Some Blog Or Something

Jessica. 21. I ride the pigeons; they owe me favors. Some reviews of me: “Pretty cute for a goblin.” And “Jessica you’re a bitch and I hate you”

[boy-and-girl-crazy123456]

Realized I don't need crunchyroll premium anymore

[nomorelonelydays]

Literally heard a convo at the library where a guy was telling a girl that he’s an omega and the girl telling him that she’s a beta, and my mind just did not automatically connect the context to fraternity pledge classes at all and I just whispered to myself “what the fuck?? What the fuck??”

[cyhiraeth]

a comedy of errors

[curioscurio]

OK so I'm no physicist yet but i think sound could be dark matter maybe 🤔

I'm also very very sleep deprived right now

[curioscurio]

Nvm nvm nvm this is so embarrassing I'm not smart im a dunce of the universe. I just made coffee but forgot to put the pot back in and went outside for 10 minutes. don't listen to anything i say

[crunchingonicedcoffeesugar]

*blows kiss up to the sky (for the aliens)*

[hannahhhbieberrr-deactivated201]

*blows kiss to iPhone screen (for the dumb person who posted this)*

[crunchingonicedcoffeesugar]

sorry you didnt like this hannah bieber hercules, shoot me an email and we can discuss what content you’d rather see in the future. 

[the-minecraft-funnies]

[depsidase]

[greenflamestherabbit]

My funniest ventriloquism story starts with the fact that I was obsessed with ventriloquism from a young age. I used to obsessively practice speaking without moving my lips, practicing the different tongue and air tricks and everything. Then I got sick with Bell’s Palsy, and it hit both sides of my face at the same time. Bell’s Palsy is like a headcold that hits your facial nerves. Anyway- This meant my entire face was paralyzed. I couldn’t speak using my lips. The doctor stared at me, dumbfounded that I was able to speak very fluently without my face moving at all.

[cantankerouscanuck]

[neofooturism]

the doctor

[its-only-the-rain]

Have you ever wondered how someone meets Santa? Well, you need to follow a very specific ritual to summon him.

[the-nwah-embassy]

Do you have any idea how long I’ve had this queued? Any idea? A year. A fucking year. I don’t even use my queue ever. Ever. This is the only thing I’ve EVER queued. I’ve had this queued for a year so I don’t forget it.

[ihatepickingusernames101]

So, I put the McElroys through the NeuralBlender and it’s a mix of haunting and wonderful

Clint. I like the sunset and cloud vibes, but the actual human element is missing for me, just a lil meatball in the corner. 4/10

Justin McElroy. Love that he looks like he’s giving a speech in a dungeon with PlayStation 2 graphics. Has a pronounced human form, and a visible Hawaiian shirt. A solid 8/10

Travis. I won’t lie, this one doesn’t do much for me. Where’s the flavor? Just half a kinda face on a pink background. It does look like the face has comically large sunglasses on, so one style point for that. 3/10

Griffin McElroy. This is beautiful. This is haunting. I want this in the MOMA, I want this hanging over my bed to watch me sleep at night. The hair color, the glasses, the head shape that looks like it was ripped from Family Guy. Twisted and blended together in something that is decidedly Griffin. I look at that, and I think yep, that’s Griffin. And around it? Unreadable, scrawling notes. In small, straight lines, not the devoted ramblings of a desperate man, but the neat and painstaking records of a man who knows he is doomed, and accepts his fate. Only a fool would try to reverse the tide. 10/10

[adz]

one time this nondescript guy came into my dunkin donuts and ordered a small black coffee with blueberry flavor shot, and for some reason that peculiar order stuck with me so much that when, seven months later, i saw him in the parking lot walking towards the door, i quickly made a small black coffee with blueberry flavor shot. he ordered it and i was already holding it. 

i would describe his demeanor that second time as “incredulous”

[honeylemony]

What the fuck who drinks that

[adz]

it’s such a perfectly bonkers order because like, most unusual orders are maximalist and sugary but this one just combines the most basic drink with the most incongruous little add-on. it’s the order of a simple, regular man who has something wrong with him

[nepofledgling]

I actually wouldn’t mind people coming back to tumblr, I think an increase in activity could be fun. I think it would be fucking hilarious if people tried to introduce 2021s influencer culture on here. you would literally get eaten alive

[garchomp-ings]

[evilscientist3]

its so homophobic that thunderstorms make me want to stand atop a sheer cliff in robes as i brandish a wizard staff but i cant without getting struck by fucking lightning

[emil]

lol this guy doesn't know how to ward off lightning. amateur

[hubedihubbe]

I’ve been wanting to do a thing like this for a while. Behold my amazing animu mongah skills there wow swoons

[hubedihubbe]

2016 rendition!

[hubedihubbe]

She finally has hands!

[hubedihubbe]

She’s on her way!

[hubedihubbe]

Wooshing that skirt a bit more!

[hubedihubbe]

Trying a softer approach!

[hubedihubbe]

Woosh that skirt some more

[ailithnight]

I feel like these things are extremely important for young artists to see.

[hustlerose]

who the fuck draws things like gangsta spongebob and godfather bugs bunny. a human being created those pieces of art. why? what compelled them?

[doggirlhen]

lust

[loptrcoptr]

I have never laughed at anything in my life as hard as I laughed at this fucking bracket

[gamchawizzy]

All hail Little Josh, sole bearer of his name, the one true Josh!

[memewhore]

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

u kids really liked this one huh everyone doin ok?

[kibblekez]

This weirdly reminds me of the time the people installing the new water heater at my house found hundreds of living clams and mushrooms under the floor in our basement.

[gallusrostromegalus]

I'm gonna need you to elaborate and provide images if possible because that sounds both horrifying and fucking magical.

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

So when Anakin Skywalker was a Jedi he looked like this

But turning to the dark side changed his physical appearance. Most notably his eyes, which became yellow (a very typical Sith transformation in many species)

And while I know that Wookies are not supposed to be able to be force sensitive and therefore cannot become Jedi or Sith, all I am saying is that

…. You know?

[keepcalmandcarriefischer]

As a tag?? You make the funniest comment on this post ever as a tag?