Call me Panda

Lazy creature, sitting and watching life happen to others. Living with depression and anger. I just reblog things I try to stay positive but it's not always easy. They/them pronouns please. Messages are always welcome, and I love to talk, though I tend to keep people at a distance until I get to know them. SPAM FANMAIL=IMMEDIATE BLOCK.

[natalieironside]

You should never create anything with a wide audience in mind. The so-called "general audience" doesn't exist; it's a fiction made up by advertising executives. Most of the time, great art and literature is made with the intention of pleasing no more than 4 or 5 specific perverts of the author's acquaintance

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

listen I ended up regretting saying anything about this on my old blog because people will interpret literally any and every statement maliciously on this hellsite but I want to start like. a helpline for people who are like “hey I pretty much only read YA but I’m like 22 now and don’t relate to teenagers as much, it’s such a shame that there are no fun books written for adults :(” because boy HOWDY are there some fun books for adults 

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

maybe I’ll start a big google doc or something one day but for now *deep breath*

The Beautiful Ones (Silvia Moreno-Garcia) - absolutely BUCKWILD romance with a dash of telekinesis; nonstop high society drama and misunderstanding from start to finish, happy ending guaranteed. STRONGLY recommend if you, like me, are a basic bitch who enjoys a bit of Pride and Prejudice. 

Binti (Nnedi Okorafor) - a math prodigy runs away from Earth to become the first of her people to attend a prestigious university in space, but shit gets real when a crew of hostile jellyfish aliens attack her ship. 

Chilling Effect (Valerie Valdes) - a spaceship captain and her crew take on a series of convoluted missions in order to rescue the captain’s sister, who’s been frozen and held for ransom. 

The City of Brass (S.A. Chakraborty) - an 18th century conwoman and a mysterious djinn team up to go looking for a legendary hidden city.

The City We Became (N.K. Jemisin) - a scrappy bunch of Chosen Ones have to band together to defend New York City (which is very much alive) from a huge ass monster. 

The Empress of Forever (Max Gladstone) - a lady supervillain gets blasted into space and meets an even bigger, planet-destroying evil space empress. literally WHAT is not to like?

The Empress of Salt and Fortune (Nghi Vo) - high fantasy royal drama about a woman making her way to power in the wake of a political marriage that left without friends or allies. 

Escaping Exodus (Nicky Drayden) - a space-faring clan are creating their latest spaceship from the insides of a giant monster when absolutely everything goes to shit (as things are wont to do in science fiction stories). 

Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars (Kai Cheng Thom) - a trans girl runs away to the big city, where she uses her martial arts skills to team up with other trans woman and form a vigilante gang to defend their own when police look the other way. a fascinating blend of poetry and prose and magical realism. 

Finna (Nino Cipri) - two exes working at an IKEA have to team up to save a customer who disappeared through one of those interdimensional portals that all IKEAs have laying around. you know how it is.

Gideon the Ninth (Tamsyn Muir) - come on, you’ve heard about this one. it’s the one with the lesbian space necromancers? yeah, that’s the one. you got it.

In the Vanishers’ Palace (Aliette de Bodard) - a Beauty and the Beast retelling based in science fiction and Vietnamese fantasy, featuring a young woman falling in love with a “beast” who’s actually a motherly dragon after becoming a tutor to the dragon’s two powerful children. 

Jade City (Fonda Lee) - urban fantasy gang wars, pitting one magically enhanced family against rivals and a new drug that lets anyone mimic their abilities. 

The Library of the Unwritten (A.J. Hackwith) - hell’s librarian gets sent on a quest to find a runaway soul. 

The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet (Becky Chambers) - aka one of my favorite books ever, essentially slice of life science fiction following an interspecies crew of deep space truckers making the longest and most complicated delivery of their lives. very warm and fuzzy. 

Mort (Terry Pratchett) - one of many MANY Discworld books, but a very good one to start with, following the adventures of a boy named Mort after he’s taken on as Death’s apprentice. you know, like the Grim Reaper? that Death. 

River of Teeth (Sarah Gailey) - historical AU in which the United States imported and domesticated hippos in the Mississippi River; follows a crew of hippo-riding crooks and hooligans as they plan one heck of a caper. 

Space Opera (Catherynne Valente) - a washed up rock star and his old bandmate get roped into performing in an intergalactic singing competition that will determine the fate of the entire planet Earth. full of aliens, attempted assassination, art, and emotional turmoil. 

This Is How You Lose the Time War (Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone) - time-travelling assassins from rival factions fall in love in a poetic and breathless story that spans centuries and reality. 

Under the Pendulum Sun (Jeannette Ng) - fairyland is real, and Victorian England is sending missionaries. a woman and her brother attempt to bring the good word to the fair folk, but start to suspect the queen might just be screwing with their heads. PEAK gothic horror with a creepy fairy twist. 

Witchmark (C.L. Polk) - a doctor and former soldier with magical powers of healing is trying to live a quiet life and avoid his controlling, aristocratic family’s plans for him, only to get tangled up in a massive political conspiracy when one of his patients mysterious dies. accompanying him in his investigation is a mysterious and gorgeous faerie man. romance ensues. 

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

for those of y’all who like goodreads I’ve started a shelf of adult books for ya fans, which is currently 40+ books strong and will continue to grow

[owldude]

imagine you make microwave popcorn and by wild chance every single kernel has the same exact popping point and after like a minute in the microwave the bag instantly fills up with a single earsplitting gunshot noise would that be fucked up or what

[alexandrareadsthings]

stop telling girls interested in lit that they need to read these great american classics by violent misogynists in order for their opinions to be valid or for their minds to be developed

[apsychicrage]

Stop telling girls who’ve already read misogynistic pieces that their opinions aren’t valid if they thought the book was shit

[anarchycox]

My husband teaching his 1st year English Lit class: “I will now in 50 minutes prove that Dr. Frankenstein and his creature were in a deep and complex homosexual relationship and the novel Frankenstein might be the greatest piece of slash fic ever written.”

Students: “What! No way!”

50 minutes later

Students: “Oh god, they are so gay, how didn’t I see that?”

[kalesatan666]

WHERE DO I SIGN UP FOR THIS CLASS

[bananasliketoparty]

i misread as 1st grade english

[thydungeongal]

Don't mind me just looking for inspiration for my swords and sandals campaign

[celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725]

Testicles, son of Bophedes, the demigod who was invincible in all but his genitals. Thus was the tragedy of Bophedes’ Nuts.

[istillfuckwithdemilovato-deacti]

if i was a pirate captain i would get a movie projector and play a movie on the big sails every friday night for my boys to kick back and enjoy some time off unless we were under attack

[poetfish]

Pirates legit did the 16-17th century equivalent of this. When things were slow, they would put on plays, act out dramas of stories they knew, or freestyle. The most preferred model of original productions was courtroom drama: “trying” each other for piracy. The “accused” would list off their many, dramatically and humorously embellished crimes, and be equally dramatically sentenced. Sometimes there was a daring escape, sometimes just a really maudlin death scene, but a good time was had by all.

[rednightmare18]

As we all suspected, pirates are theater nerds.

[birthdaypigeon]

could u imagine if ppl talked about catholicism the same way they talked about like… indigenous ppl’s religions….

[birthdaypigeon]

girl in horror movie holding a bible open: “according to legend, a mob tortured a half-man, half-god, and nailed him to a wooden cross, leaving him to starve to death. But days later, on this very night, they found he had clawed his way out of the grave. Now those who believe lie in wait for him to rise again, To honour him, they have weekly gatherings where they chant and sing, and at the end of it they eat his flesh and blood.”

girl’s friend: “wow.. thats so creepy…”

horror movie jock: “it’s only a myth, don’t worry”

[roomba-with-knives-taped-to-it]

I love the fact that this is insinuating that jesus is going to try to kill these kids

[alexanderrm]

“Please save me! I’ll do anything for you!” “Then perish.” “Hell is empty, and all the devils are here.” “Will you fight? Or will you perish like a dog?” “…Then I shall face God, and walk backwards into hell.” “…I’d strike the sun if it insulted me.” 

-All of these are from shitposts, regrettably not from literary classics.

[angstriddentrashhuman]

Shakespeare’s ghost is simultaneously thrilled that these happened and irate that he didn’t create them

[prokopetz]

Remember: toe beans are the sign of a killer.

[prokopetz]

Funnily enough, I’m not 100% joking. While many animals have paw pads, the particular kind of soft, squishy beans found on housecats are an adaptation for stealth. Squishy beans mean you’re looking at an ambush predator.

[slippyflippers]

These are the beans of a killer, Bella.

[lovedthestars-toofondly]

[footage of Victor Frankenstein sewing together female body parts to make a mate for the Creature while Lou Bega’s Mambo no.5 plays]

[namara-ashina]

@pkmndaisuki how could you leave this in the tags???

[reallybadblackoutpoems]

imagination (1963) - harold ordway rugg

"chekhovs cat / schrödingers razor / occams gun"

[venort]

Chekov's Cat: if you see a cat in the first act, it will probably be relevant later. (example: Alien)

Shrodinger's razor: an unopened box may or may not contain the solution to the story; there's no way to know without opening it. (example: Monk)

Occam's gun: the simplest way to kill off a character is to shoot them. (example: Bambi)

[aegimeda]

i have been cracking up at this for the past 3 minutes

[jesticutioner]

Chekov's Box: If there is a container introduced in the opening act, it will be opened later.

Schrodinger's Gun: Treat every gun as if it's loaded unless you've checked it yourself.

Occam's Cat: If you hear strange noises at night, it's probably a cat.

[valarhalla]

Fun fact: Tenochtitlan fell in 1521. From 1603 onwards, large numbers of honest-to-god fricking Japanese Samurai came to Mexico from Japan to work as guardsmen and mercenaries. 

Ergo, it would be 100% historically accurate to write a story starring a quartet consisting of the child or grandchild of Aztec Noblemen, an escaped African slave, a Spanish Jew fleeing the Inquisition (which was relaxed in Mexico in 1606, for a time) and a Katana-wielding Samurai in Colonial Mexico.

[valarhalla]

Also a whole bunch of Chinese Characters BECAUSE MEXICO CITY HAD A CHINATOWN WITHIN TEN YEARS OF THE FALL OF THE AZTEC EMPIRE.

[medievalpoc]

I love how much this shakes up people’s worldviews, and the way it makes you realize how unnaturally we isolate historical events (and peoples).

For people looking to dig into some research:

Charles Mann, 1493: Uncovering the New World Columbus Created [Knopf, 2011], page 324:

The Chinese in Mexico, Robert Chao Romero

The Spanish Expulsion (1492); Judaism in Mexico

“Denunciation of Faith and Family: Crypto-Jews and the Inquisition in Seventeenth-Century Mexico”, Rafaela Acevedo-Field 

**ETA just to make it clear I hate the title of the first book up there ^^ and the overall tone of it-I’m using it to verify information that’s true but the interpretation leaves quite a bit to be desired

[raecupcake-blog]

"When Shelley's corpse washed ashore, a friend identified it by a copy of Keats's 1820 volume in the coat pocket, which he knew Shelley had taken with him. Then, after cremation in which Shelley's heart, hardened by calcium, did not burn, this same friend snatched it from the embers and presented it to Mary Shelley, who kept it thereafter in her desk, wrapped in a copy of 'Adonais."

Here’s your morbid literary fact of the day.

[voidbat]

jesus christ, i will never be this goth.

[katrinastratford]

Mary Shelley’s father taught her to spell her name by taking her to the graveyard and having her trace the letters on her mother, Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley’s gravestone.

NO ONE will ever be as goth.

[closet-lunatic-deactivated20170]

didnt she also have sex on said grave

[mankillercalledbunny]

She lost her virginity on her mother’s grave yes

[violent-darts]

… that’s it we can all go home, peak goth was achieved before we even started.

[jstor]

JSTOR confirms it: http://www.jstor.org/stable/3177447

[optimysticals]

Mary Freaking Shelley is None More Goth personified.

[flapper-queen]

@mama-germany Achieve maximum goth

[nyokoko]

@saarebitch

[gothiccharmschool]

If I fail to reblog this, assume I’m stuck in my crypt, and someone needs to come help me.

[gehayi]

She also wrote a post-apocalyptic science fiction novel focusing on the extinction of the human race and the meaninglessness of existence. In 1826.

Oh, and this isn’t especially goth, but my God, I respect her for this:

In 1827, Mary Shelley was party to a scheme that enabled her friend Isabel Robinson and Isabel’s lover, Mary Diana Dods, who wrote under the name David Lyndsay, to embark on a life together in France as man and wife.[126][note 13] With the help of  [American actor John Howard] Payne, whom she kept in the dark about the details, Mary Shelley obtained false passports for the couple.[127]

[ceridwens-cauldron]

The more I learn about Mary Shelley the more I love her

[monsieurenjlolras]

I mean makes sense that she was supportive of her non-straight friends because like she and her husband had an open relation ships and he definitely slept with other men (Lord Byron) and there’s a decent chance that Mary Shelley may have at the very least kissed other women

[almanacp]

So she was an LGBT ally icon as well as the Mother of Science Fiction. Adding her to my list of heroes.

(also @garrettauthor sorry I keep tagging you, but I feel you’d like this.)

[garrettauthor]

Oh my god do I ever like this.

[violetwolfraven]

So I just had a thought

What if supernatural creatures don’t exist anymore? What if they did once, but through the years, they slowly mixed in with humans?

You can see the blood of fairies in the way a ballet dancer hovers in mid air before he or she hits the ground. You can see it in the way that middle school girl never forgets when someone makes her a promise. You can see it in how that one little boy in the kindergarten class seems more comfortable in the forest on that field trip than the others.

You can see the blood of dryads in hikers who never trip over roots. You can see it in that suburban grandmother never lets any of her garden die. You can see it in that one kid who climbs a tree faster than his friends, barely looking at the branches as he goes.

You can see the blood of naiads in the way a professional swimmer seems to command the water to help them. You can see it in how a cross country runner needs a water break more often than his teammates. You can see it in the way that one girl in your class always has a water bottle on her desk.

You can see the blood of mermaids in a surfer who can be tossed around underwater for a long time without drowning. You can see it in a teenage boy who doesn’t have to pretend to be unbothered by the pressure when he races his friends to the bottom of a swimming pool. You can see it in the little girl who wades into every stream she sees on a hike without quite knowing why.

You can see the blood of sirens in people who never have a problem with getting people to date them. You can see it in that soprano who can hit notes most of her fellows can only dream of. You can see it in the camp counselor who all the straight girls have a crush on, who can play guitar and sing better than any of the others.

You can see the blood of shapeshifters in the way an actor adjusts their personality to become their character with scary accuracy. You can see it in the subconscious, barely noticeable changes a tween girl’s eyes make to match her outfit better. You can see it in the way you always lose that one friend in a crowd if you’re not careful, because he’s just too good at blending in.

People who carry the blood of werewolves don’t change with the full moon anymore, but you can still see it in the way your best friend always knows something is wrong, though even they don’t know they’re smelling the changes in your body chemistry. You can see it in the way that one guy always seems to eat more than the reasonable amount of red meat at an all-you-can-eat buffet. You can see it in the way that one werido never has a problem when the teacher turns off the lights before a PowerPoint presentation because her eyes adjust quicker and better than yours.

The blood of supernatural creatures may have mostly faded away. But if you look closely, you can still see it.

[thegaylists]

sapphic//songs about __

Girls with a boyfriends

your boyfriend by bloxx

boyfriend by marika hackman

girlfriend by kitty

boyfriend by tegan and sara

girlfriend by ria mae

taking off all my clothes by heidi

Breakups

talia by king princess

0108 by nakala

strangers by halsey

me & her by heavens to betsy

curious by hayley kiyoko

sheet stains by lauren ruth ward

always this way by laura marling

heartbroken forever by tender forever

now im all messed up by tegan and sara

Bad Girls

goth girls are easy by lesbian bed death

dressed in black by gossip

lesbian vampyres from outer space

she’s a gun by the greeting committee

woman dangerous by doria roberts

rebel girl by bikini kill

P.U.N.K girl by heavenly

strong woman by jen cloher

Sex

sweet girl by nicole dollanganger

bitches by tove lo

bang me box by miley cyrus

box by siya

holy by king princess

i didn’t just kiss her by jen foster

Young love

be my leia by the dollyrots

red by miki ratsula

sappho by frankie cosmos

hold your hand by nicolette forte

no kings by the total bettys

say anything by girl in red

hot like the room by my body

gossip girl by grace vanderwaal

sweet girl by nicole dollanganger

Old Love

marry me by tender forever

with a girl like you by thao

eden with my eve by jen cloher

Bisexuality

boys by maris

carmen by lana del rey

bad at love by halsey

in or out by ani difranco

think about girls sometimes by amber

i wanna boyfriend with a car by kate nash

Lesbians

I’ll never want a BF by bec sandridge

i don’t do boys by elektra

dyke march 2001 by le tigre

dyke bars never last by sapphic lasers\

blue collar sex kitten by lauren ruth ward

the only dyke at the open mic by kate reid

Pining

sleepover by hayley kiyoko

jessie’s girl by mary lambert

bestie by sizzy rocket

daisy by zedd

like me by chely wright

veronica by daddy issues

i want her by blind fury

jenny by studio killers

i wanna be your girlfriend by girl in red

Confidence

B.I.G by caitlyn scarlett

shade by iamddb

ICY GRL by saweetie ft. kehlani

boinked the bride by ember swift

checking out your babe by tribe 8

Q.U.E.E.N by janelle monae

Real People/Characters/Media

edie windsor by zoë lewis

the ellen page by partner

marceline by willow

carol by jen cloher

fingersmith by jen cloher

Coming out/Homophobia

homo song by mara levi

room by palehound

LGBT by lowell

love is love by naz & ella

love is love by starley

married in london by janis ian

pride by grace petrie

this is me by jen foster

gay sex by be steadwell

not worth hiding by alex the astronaut

Butch/Femme

drag king bar by bitch and animal

femme bitch top by tribe 8

only straight girls wear dresses by cwa

dyke bars never last by sapphic lasers

butch in the streets by tribe 8

closet femme by kate reid 

Running away

greatness by jen foster

chelsea lets go join the circus by agent R

feminist housewives by bitch and animal

[goodbyedearfriends-deactivated2]

Latin phrases to use as incantations.

This is gonna be a long list.

ab intra - from within

ab origine - from the source

absit iniuria - “let insult be absent”

absit invidia - “let envy be absent”

absit omen - “let omens be absent”

ab uno disce omnes - from one, learn all.

abyssus abyssum invocat - deep calleth unto deep

a capite ad calcem - from head to heel

acta non verba - actions not words

ad altiora tendo - “I strive to higher things”

ad astra - to the stars

ad fontes - to the sources

ad meliora - towards better things

ad oculos - to the eyes

ad undas - to the waves

ad victoriam - to victory

adsum - I am here

a fortiori - from the stronger/from strength

a mari usque ad mare - from sea to sea

audeamus - let us dare

audentes fortuna iuvat - fortune favors the bold

audi, vide, tace - hear, see, be silent

beatae memoriae - of blessed memory

bona fide - in good faith

bono malum superate - overcome evil with good

capax infiniti - holding the infinite

carpe diem - seize the day

carpe noctem - seize the night

cave - beware

ceteris paribus - all other things being equal

circa - around

citius, altius, fortius - faster, higher, stronger

clavis aurea - golden key

cogito ergo sum - I think, therefor I am

compos mentis - in control of the mind

concilio et labore - by wisdom and effort

concordia cum veritate - in harmony with truth

concordia salus - well-being through harmony

coniunctis viribus - with connected strength

consummatum est - it is complete

corruptus in extremis - corrupt to the extreme

crescit eundo - it grows as it goes

de novo - from the new

de profundis - from the depths

dies irae - day of wrath

dona nobis pacem - give us peace

ego te provoco - I challenge you

esse est percipi - to be is to be perceived  

esse quam videri - to be, rather than to seem

esto quod es - be what you are

ex animo - from the soul

ex luna scientia - from the moon, knowledge

ex scientia tridens - from knowledge, sea power

ex silentio - from silence

ex undis - from the waves of the sea

experientia docet - experience teaches

fac et spera - do and hope

fac fortia et patere - do brave deed and endure

faciam quodlibet quod necesse est - I’ll do whatever it takes

faciam ut mei memineris - I’ll make you remember me

facta, non verba - deeds, not words

fortis et liber - strong and free

fortis in arduis - strong in difficulties

gloriosus et liber - glorious and free

hic abundant leones - here lions abound

hic et nunc - here and now

hic sunt dracones - here there are dragons

hinc illae lacrimae - hence those tears

hinc itur ad astra - from here the way leads to the stars

igni ferroque - with fire and iron

in memoriam - into the memory

in nocte consilium - advice comes over night

libra - balance

littera scripta manet - the written words endure

locus standi - a right to stand

luceo non uro - I shine, not burn

luctor et emergo - I struggle and emerge

mare liberum - free sea

memento vivere - remember to live

more ferarum - like beasts

natura non contristatur - nature is not saddened

nec spe, nec metu - without hope, without fear

noli me tangere - do not touch me

ophidia in herba - a snake in the grass

pro se - for oneself

propria manu - by one’s own hand

quaere - to seek

quod abundat non obstat - what is abundant does not hinder

resurgam - I shall arise

semper ad meliora - always towards better things

semper anticus - always forward

semper apertus - always open

semper fortis - always brave

semper liber - always free

stet - let it stand

tuebor - I will protect

vera causa - true cause