Childe x Zhongli: you got betrayal, bloodlust, sugar daddies, convenient dragon anatomy, wrong sides of the war, miscommunications, culture clash—
Zhongli x Venti: those who share the memory....../I am the only person who understands your nightmares, I have the same ones—a kingdom is burning to the ground and I have a torch in my hand
Venti x Diluc: my kingdom’s beloved god is the annoying twink bard that keeps stealing my wine???
Diluc x Kaeya: translations are ~funky~ and that’s all I’ll say about that
Kaeya x Albedo: sexy coworker/destined to destroy the nation we love
Diluc x Childe: you killed my father, prepare to kissie
Childe x Kaeya: flirting to “gather intel”/if you stare long enough into the abyss, the abyss will stare back
Scaramouche x Childe: do you wanna place your bloody hand into my bloodier hand/whoever kills the most people gets to decide on dinner tonight
Mona x Scaramouche: whoever wins this tongue battle gets to decide whether astrology is real or not
Venti x Xiao: I fell in love with you the moment you played titanic on your recorder 1000 years ago
Xiao x Zhongli: loyalty. oh god my general is so fucking hot oh my god why is bowing to him so sexy
Keqing x Ganyu: my biggest turn on is the ability to do math and question divinity
Beidou x Ningguang: everyone knows the mayor is bonking the local pirate captain and yet to avoid death and egregious financial investigation, they say nothing
Ninggunag x Zhongli: the reincarnation of your best friend that died thousands of years ago is now pegging you
Razor x Bennett: puppy love with a puppy man
Chongyun x Xingqiu: matching keychains with your high school boyfriend
Childe x Lumine: trust me when I say he enjoys being kicked in the shins
Albedo x Aether: blond boys doing what blond boys do (turn each other into catboys)
Jean x Lisa: sexy librarian SEDUCES young mayor/true love is forged in civil management
Diluc x Jean: if you ever need to talk something out, my office door is always open (I left you a key a long time ago)
Amber x Eula: love is melting down someone’s icey walls (literal, actual, I have my fire arrows drawn and ready, come out and accept my love please)
Xiao x Traveler: I've watched that scene of Xiao catching them probably a thousand times analyzing every twitch of the hands like its a period drama
Ei x Yae: I love you so please trust me when I say that you are being a little bitch
Sara x Itto: staring at your “enemy”s tits while dueling for the 54th time that week, saying it’s because that’s where the vital organs are
Itto x Gorou: the Mulan effect—hot warriors are hot no matter what gender they present as
Kazuha x Tomo: cheering while your bf sword fights with god/please don’t go, what’s gonna happen to your cat (whats gonna happen to me)
Ayaka x Thoma: period drama we can’t do this you’re a lady and I am but your humble servant what will your older brother think
Ayato x Thoma: maid kink + period drama we can’t do this you’re a lord and I am but your humble servant you need an heir to maintain power in your clan
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