CSI Amish Country

My name is Justin and I'm currently living in Milwaukee, WI. He/Him. I've had a pretty interesting life so far and can't wait to see what I do next.

[stuffing-pillows]

[sonderpoison]

JACKIE CHAN ADVENTURES (2000-2005)

[tilthat]

TIL the first known case of “dying from laughing” involved the greek man called Chrysippus, who, after giving figs to his donkey, cried out “Now give the donkey a drink of pure wine to wash down the figs”, had a fit of laughter afterwards and died.

via reddit.com

[honted]

pretty funny i guess

[pastabot]

had to be there

[llamallover]

Translation is always tricky, but I remember this slightly different:

Figs were an imported delicacy at the time, and the donkey just managed to eat them (without being given any on purpose). Seeing a donkey eating several times their own value in figs, the philosopher looked to his servant who might have been standing there either in shock, despair, or both, and said something along the lines of “Oh don’t just stand there. Get him some (undiluted) wine to wash the figs down with”. With (undiluted) wine also being an expensive drink.

I feel like that context makes it funnier. Basically like standing in front of your burning mansion with a butler, meeting their eyes, and telling them that you still feel a little chilly and ask them if they could put on an extra log or two.

[commandtower-solring-go]

idk what’s funnier, the burning house situation, or being the butler as you watch your master laugh so hard at his own joke that he fully fucking dies.

[depsidase]

[tchaikovskaya]

had to be there i guess

[superherospinoff]

[Image ID: Screenshot of a paragraph that reads ‘Batman is quite famously an orphan, as are the first two Robins. For years Tim Drake was unusual among the Batclan in having a living parent, but eventually the temptations of orphanhood overcame the writers. End ID]

still one of the funniest ways i’ve ever heard tim’s backstory recapped 

[wajjs]

sleepy tired but coffee machine at work can make hot cock so I'm surviving

[wajjs]

HOT CHOCO I MEAN HOT CHOCO

[wajjs]

please don't do this to me

[johnwickfucker]

[funnytwittertweets]

[aphony-cree]

This feels like a good time add one of my favorite weird inventions from history: The book wheel, invented in 1588

[beardedmrbean]

[cryoverkiltmilk]

Acceptable use of 'Boys will be boys'.

[reagan-slayer69]

for your viewing pleasure I have marked where their heads cannot be

[laughconfetti]

Leave Space For Jesus

[guooey]

please please please help me find more cats smelling a smelly smell 

[glourp]

A compilation from the notes: stimky

[vancila]

source

[dingdongyouarewrong]

americans are always saying shit like garbage disposal and i-95

[toanshirotaka]

Those are good names for a pair of orange cats

[waterwizardcat]

I draw too many vash recently he started to look like woodstock to me

[waterwizardcat]

[waterwizardcat]

people's voice is heard

now you have wolfwood as snoopy

[fakemon]

A concept I concocted after recently falling down the rabbit-hole of Haachama and her cooking streams.

Art was once again commissioned from Nyula.

[niceinchnails]

why so celibate

-the jerker

[shizas-salad]

Why did this make me laugh

[niceinchnails]

Because my friend you have a jovial soul

[rydenxo]

okay picture this; i go back in time and find a victorian orphan child. do i blow his mind? do i break his brain? NO!!! i give him warm soft clothes and a hug. he gets me wizard high off what would commonly be used to treat a minor cough in that era. we both eventually contract a deadly illness and then i bring him to the future where we get easily cured of our ailment. i buy him a happy meal afterwards. he’s my good son now. love you son.

[catsoverloaded]

Poor girl broke her favorite sitting basket.

[kitten-cab00dle]

I’m sorry but this is the funniest thing I have ever seen ever in my fucking life her PEETS are STICKING OUT

[beatlemeat-archive]

from the creators of kids bop meet adult bop where we take regular songs and make it have as many curse words as possible

[chaotickalix-deactivated2021050]

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck Banana phone