Palest Bitch In Florida

Faith, 20, Florida. Disney addict! Rarely active but funny af

[cartoon-deactivated20220930]

Sorry, Dad. I couldn't think of a nice way to say "America Stinks!"

The Simpsons, Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington (1991) dir. Wes Archer

[raccoonfootproductions]

“A little girl is losing faith in democracy!”

“Good lord!”

[bellasredchevy]

the news: “Hurricane Dorian is now expected to be Category 4 by the time it hits Florida. Gov. DeSantis has declared a state of emergency. Floridians should prepare to evacuate”

floridians:

[kuromilesbian-deactivated202205]

Me after a long day of being a stupid bitch

[pokemonpostsdaily]

Only day you can reblog this

[tardisman14]

HINGA DINGA DERGEN!

[thedoomreport-deactivated202201]

Some of you really deserve to be called the F word.

[xanadu-next]

[rosewater1997]

all i ever think about is skincare and getting rawed

[istillfuckwithdemilovato-deacti]

have you guys considered hobbies

[retroactivebakeries]

all i ever think about is tabletop roleplaying games and getting rawed

[swampfevercapital]

have you considered skincare

[ignorance-is-injustice]

Someone do the triangle where you can only pick two.

[singerrrsongwriterrr-deactivate]

[carldangerous]

Reach for the stars, get all three

[animals-riding-animals]

[timblywimbly]

Shadow of the Colossus

[owlmylove]

it’s officially impossible for me to fall in love bc last night at a party drunk-me remembered that sober-me had thrown 3 funsize kitkats into my bag with the explicit thought “drunk-me is going to be so excited when she finds these” and i don’t think any other person is gonna be able to love me like that

[transcendental-genderism-deacti]

but what did drunk you ever do for sober you

[owlmylove]

one time i blacked out and woke up to find 13 full sized rolls of ritz crackers in my bag bc drunk me is also an ideal provider

[scoobycore]

god, imagine sharing a bed with the person you love. chatting about dumb things! just sleeping! it’s like a sleepover but every night how sweet is that!!!!

[cute-pessimess]

All the people in long term relationships will fight to the death for that fucking blanket at night

[theweirdwideweb]

[cute-pessimess]

While simultaneously waving to the person you’re crossing as a thank you

[riotsnotdiets]

[yeahwehadatime]

[revolutionarykoolaid]

reblog to save a life

[thenatsdorf]

Music box puts kitten to sleep. (via osirisosito)

[tootsieboy-deactivated20171122]

I use the snapchat camera to take selfies…the iPhone camera captures the real me…a me I don’t want to see…

[shawtyfromroundtheway]

If this ain’t the truth. Double points for both. 🙃

[john-marshall]

Okay I’m trying to find this one particular meme… I’m hoping that with this rough recreation I just made in paint I can Stir Someone’s Memory and they can send me the true meme. It looks something like this:

I haven’t seen this meme in years but I love it so much, please

[nickvelantine]

[john-marshall]

THANK YOU

[bob-belcher]

[fireb0y]

STICK HIM LEGS UP IN THE AIR

[prokopetz]

If you’re trying to catch a housecat that’s gotten outside, don’t forget: they’re an ambush predator and you’re a persistence predator. You have several times more endurance than they do - use that to your advantage! Don’t run after them; that’s playing to the cat’s strengths, and vigorous pursuit may cause them to hide. Instead, follow them at a brisk walking pace until they get tired and need to have a lie-down, at which point you can simply pick them up and take them home.

[fsthhdwefg-deactivated20180515]

Ok but no shit this tactic is what allowed humans to survive pre-civilisation

[lowkey-revolutionary-raccoon]

Some mammoth: *chilling, eating grass, mammothing*

Cavedude: *power walks towards them*

Mammoth: oh sIHT

[krwzprtt]

cat : haha you can’t outrun me

human: