o my darlin clementine =^..^=

Dreaming about sloths and sunflowers she/her

[omgthatdress]

Hedy Lamarr in The Great Zigfield, 1936

Costume by Adrian

[onlytwitterpics]

[veryfunnymemes]

[i-cant-make-a-good-name]

[dandy-boi-ftm]

The best part is the fact that out of the two of them Martha Stewart was the one who went to prison.

[shadowkat678]

Wait…what?

[2fngrsin]

Wiiiiild. He did commit murder (in self defense - no judging) and America‘s Best Housewife was sent to jail because of insider trading, securities fraud, obstruction of justice and conspiracy. This is wiiiiiild 😄😄😄

[skrytch]

[brunhiddensmusings]

also he has every right to make fun of kanye west considering snoop has had a successful career for about two decades including his own cookbook and appearing in movies whereas kanye is a flat earther who had to crowdfund another album because he ran out of money despite kim kardashian being with him, not having the money to produce another album should be the metric when you know you can tell a musician has failed somewhere in either money management or actually being a musician rather then a famous trainwreck

[sunshine-tattoo]

snoop dogg is a good man who loves cooking, nature, and supporting the dreams of young children in poverty. kanye west helped get trump elected.

[brunhiddensmusings]

seriously though check out his cookbook its beautiful

and filled with lgiht humor, legit cooking, and charming life stories

[nevercure]

Whenever I think about snoop I remember that episode of cribs where he lived in an unusually modest house compared to everyone else on that show, spent the entire time with his young daughter hugging onto his leg and dragging her around as he walked. He even talked about how he didn’t want his kids to be musicians and that he just wants them to have a chance at a normal life / he doesn’t wish music career drama on anyone

The dude is mega down to earth for having a networth of 135 million dollars and staying relevant for longer than some of the top charting musicians have been alive

[brunhiddensmusings]

he says he keeps a supply of poptarts in the house for his nieces/nephews and grandkids but admits theyre really for him and then goes on to discuss what selection of condiments your fridge should have to jazz up leftover takeout hes one of the most thoroughly human humans ive ever known of

[owengrose]

Doesn’t he also coach football for kids, and stops smoking during the season to set a good example for the kids?

[bossymarmalade]

all these people going on about how Hozier is the peak representation of musical soft masculinity when Snoop has been out here rocking the smoothest braids and most hype manicures for decades

[stelamaris]

[unamedwatcher]

Have you seen his Planet Earth voiceover video? It’s the best thing I’ve ever heard. Man knows nothing about otters

[randomslasher]

Plizzanet Earth is a joy. Here’s the playlist:

[ironwoman359]

Why has no one ever told me about Plizzanet Earth oh my god

[holykryptonitekitten]

Snoop is legit; don’t come for him. 

[nuggsmum]

He also did an episode of Storybots and my kids adore the computer man. Which is wild to me. Cuz I remember gangster rap Snoop. And we love and support Snoop in this house.

[ijustwannagobacktosleep]

Love him, great man

[fanwithoutaplan]

plizzanet earth

[prismatic-bell]

Hozier is the peak of good white masculinity. Snoop is the peak of good Black masculinity, and on top of what Hozier does, Snoop adds something a lot of Black children never get to see—you can be a man, you can have “cred,” you can be cool, and also know how to make cookies. (Hozier is great, but he’s never been cool a day in his life and he freely admits this. The two of them have very different kinds of good masculinity both culturally and personally.)

There’s this idea—and the tweet opening this thread exemplifies it—that being “gangsta” means being self-absorbed, materialistic, and violent. Snoop is just like “nah, I have bling and street talk and I’m higher than a kite and also I love my kids and cooking and FUCK your toxic masculinity,” and that’s an important message. You can have the look, if you like the look, but you don’t have to be a stereotype to have the look.

[lizzie-saltzman]

TOP 5 EPISODES OF BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER ACCORDING TO IMDB

[sosuperawesome]

Lara Hacker on Instagram

[catasters]

[doggosource]

you know who it is

[ifitaintbaroque]

[doggosource]

the one and only

[nicollekidman]

the peak of network comedies

[bignaz8]

[recklesslyinfatuated]

Current mood.

[memewhore]

[marinella-ela]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[gerrycanavan]

 I’m afraid of Americans

[lindsayribar]

This is super real.

[justgot1]

Completely accurate.

[next-time-you-invite-pam]

@pre-successful America exposed. 

[themightyglamazon]

It’s hilarious watching non-Americans react to this with fear because I read it just nodding along like “yes, in fact this is How Things Are, there you go”

[sexycraisinthanos]

If you ask an American how they are and they respond “Super.” that means they want to die

[themightyglamazon]

ACCURATE

[nyanbinyuri]

If they say they’re peachy it means they’re tired of existence

[drneverland]

If they say “Living the dream,” it means “please kill me, I hate my job so, so much.”

[accordingtomyresearch]

also “that’s a great question” means “I have no freaking idea”

[aampharros]

if asked “how are things going?” and they reply “its going” it means theyre in the middle of a mental breakdown

[notthepopeiv]

“Getting by” means that I, personally, I am just barely surviving at the moment, please don’t ask any difficult questions.

[roguebelle]

Also if you actually answer “How are you?” honestly, it will cause other Americans to have a total BSOD response. We don’t know what to do.

[jumpingjacktrash]

please be aware that this differs by region.

if someone in san francisco tells you your work is “interesting” it means they think it’s galaxy brain and they want to write a paper on it.

from someone in new york, it means they’re not impressed but they’re still going to name drop you when you’re famous.

from someone in minneapolis, it means it’s appalling and they’re embarrassed for you but they don’t want to hurt your feelings.

midwesterners in response to “how are you”:

“eh, same old same old” = actually okay

“not s’bad” = pretty good

“not s’good” = i’m about to ask you for a favor

“can’t complain” = i can, and if you don’t ask i will hint for hours

“really great” = i have something to brag about but i’m too midwestern to volunteer it so please prompt me

“oh i just can’t believe this weather, we have ten thousand dollars of hail damage to our roof, my aunt has bubonic plague, three of our cows were stolen by aliens, and my dog wants a divorce!” = i’m the happiest i’ve ever been and you’re my best friend, i trust you with my life

“could be better” = i have cancer

[sandandglass]

[vetmedirl]

God bless nurses forever

[dynamite5ftjewishbitch]

[toastbutteregg]

[omgthatdress]

stolen from Twitter

[itsfunnytome]