Not A Dragon

[beardedmrbean]

this sounds like a party to me

[grand-theft-carbohydrates]

[tikkety-tok]

This is what Rasputin would've wanted.

[teaboot]

I feel like I'm being seduced like one of those fancy rainforest birds

[fruitpilled]

is it working

[teaboot]

Yes

[magnuspool]

[sloppystyle]

😳

[transmortifried]

[elecktrum]

This . . . actually looks like a doable workout routine.

[brightlotusmoon]

...in fact a bunch of these have been done in my cerebral palsy therapies, at least with help. And my upper abs are hardcore, particularly on the left which is my spastic hemiplegia side, because spastic CP means microspasms and chronic contracting of muscles. Like, you can't see my six pack anymore, but I have done most of these workouts in some form for my disability for a couple of decades.

[stevishabitat]

I needs this. I used to have very strong core, and it was such a good thing for life in general. Then I did the pregnancy. And yo... pregnancy does quite a thing to your abdomen. I had no idea what that would actually be like IRL.

Now... my muscles are very floppy, and not much good at things like lifting, carrying, getting off the couch, keeping my back from hurting, etc. 

I would have no idea where to start though, because most of what this lovely person demonstrated would just look like me laying on the floor like a fish out of water.

Is there a beginner version???

[brightlotusmoon]

@stevishabitat Look up physical therapy exercises for core strength! We do a lot of thrusts, bridges, bicycles, planks, Pilates style movements where you lay on your back and lift your legs up, lots of propping up the legs on a large ball, etc. Roll up a towel or use a resistance band and use it across your feet as you stretch your legs. I've never had pregnancies but I'd imagine it's like a lot of core injuries that need gentle encouraging to get the muscles and tendons to snap back. Even lying in bed lifting my upper body so I "crunch" my abs is very helpful.

I suggest physical therapy and Pilates and tai chi over yoga poses, because I personally cannot do yoga unless it is specific restorative style for disabilities like what my mom teaches.

Also, I hate Western Yoga Culture to the point where it's an anxiety trigger, so if I do a move that someone insists is yoga and I politely with bared teeth say it's physical therapy, I'm just trying not to snap. Long story, many arguments with yoga instructors who didn't understand CPTSD. Also, it's contradicted in EDS and spasticity, and even some folks in my cerebral palsy groups have turned into "yoga heals everything" cultists and they're hard to ignore.

Anyway. Physical therapy and orthopedic exercises to train the abs, lower back, and hips. *finger guns, double thumbs*

("don't let them get to you, just ignore them, just be you tee hee" is much easier said than done when you're not being actively targeted by people who really do think they know you better than you know you)

[kyidyl]

@stevishabitat I believe that @hawthorn-and-ivy had a similar problem after giving birth to her twins. She might have some good advice. :)

[earendil-was-a-mariner]

While talking with the Hobbits, Tom Bombadil puts on the One Ring. For a moment, all of the Nazgul burst into merry song. It is never discussed among them again.

[ttrtru]

I really couldn’t stop my self drawing this lol

[da-boy-o-kultur]

Eldritch horrors getting an eldritch horror experience, for a second they experienced something incomprehensible.

[paulgadzikowski]

[eowyn7023]

the last time I reblogged this, it did not yet have the happy face on the Eye of Sauron. I think it just makes it even more hilarious.

[beardedmrbean]

[theman]

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

[tattooedzombigirl]

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

[secondlina]

Reblogging because it’s a damn potato and I want to encourage people to assume potatoes are magical.

[sinksanksockie2]

w-what if potato is actually lucky

[dontsteponthe-momeraths]

i need a lucky potato

[slashtiddie]

My friend sent me this no context

I want what they have

[actually-elley]

This is the true spirit of Halloween

[dr-graf]

Oh, by the way, there are already 10 covers!

Witches are next

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2022??

Absolute beginner adult ballet series (fabulous beginning teacher)

40 piano lessons for beginners (some of the best explanations for piano I’ve ever seen)

Excellent basic crochet video series

Basic knitting (probably the best how to knit video out there)

Pre-Free Figure Skate Levels A-D guides and practice activities (each video builds up with exercises to the actual moves!)

How to draw character faces video (very funny, surprisingly instructive?)

Another drawing character faces video

Literally my favorite art pose hack

Tutorial of how to make a whole ass Stardew Valley esque farming game in Gamemaker Studios 2??

Introduction to flying small aircrafts

French/Dutch/Fishtail braiding

Playing the guitar for beginners (well paced and excellent instructor)

Playing the violin for beginners (really good practical tips mixed in)

Color theory in digital art (not of the children’s hospital variety)

Retake classes you hated but now there’s zero stakes:

Calculus 1 (full semester class)

Learn basic statistics (free textbook)

Introduction to college physics (free textbook)

Introduction to accounting (free textbook)

Learn a language:

Ancient Greek

Latin

Spanish

German

Japanese (grammar guide) (for dummies)

French

Russian (pretty good cyrillic guide!)

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2023??

Cooking with flavor bootcamp (used what I learned in this a LOT this year)

Beekeeping 101

Learn Interior Design from the British Academy of Interior Design (free to audit course - just choose the free option when you register)

Video on learning to read music that actually helped me??

How to use and sew with a sewing machine

How to ride a bike (listen. some of us never learned, and that's okay.)

How to cornrow-braid hair (I have it on good authority that this video is a godsend for doing your baby niece's black hair)

Making mead at home (I actually did this last summer and it was SO good)

How to garden

Basics of snowboarding (proceed with caution)

How to draw for people who (think they) suck at art (I know this website looks like a 2003 monstrosity, but the tutorials are excellent)

Pixel art for beginners so you can make the next great indie game

Go (back) to school

Introduction to Astronomy (high school course - free textbook w/ practice problems)

Principals of Economics (high school course - free textbook w/ practice problems)

Introduction to philosophy (free college course)

Computer science basics (full-semester Harvard course free online)

Learn a language

Japanese for Dummies (link fix from 2022)

Ukrainian

Portuguese (Brazil)

American Sign Language (as somebody who works with Deaf people professionally, I also strongly advise you to read up on Deaf/HoH culture and history!)

Chinese (Mandarin, Simplified)

Quenya (LOTR fantasy elf language)

[hamletthedane]

Want to learn something new in 2024??

Beginner-oriented video on how to sail

This guy has so many videos on baking different types of bread. SO very many.

Coding in Python - one of the most flexible and adaptable high-level programming languages out there - explained through projects making video games

Learn to swim! (for adult learners. I don’t care if you live in Kansas or Mali or wherever. LEARN TO SWIM.)

Learn how quantum mechanics works. Then read some more about it

[Learn about quantum mechanics again, but in a more advanced engineering/mathematics class. Then read more about the math and physics of it]

Poetry Handbook, by Mary Oliver

Something I learned this year: how to sew a quilt (Here’s a very easy beginning pattern that looks amazing and can be done with pre-cut fabric!)

How to hit the ball in softball

Tutorial video on what is under the hood of most (gas) cars + weird engine sounds and what they mean

Full beginner mechanics technical training, if you want to go more in depth

Playlist on how car engine physics work if you want to go ultra in depth

Lecture series on architecture design through study of buildings

How (American income) taxes & tax law work (choose “audit course” at checkout for free class)

Pickleball for beginners (so you can finally join your neighbor/friend/distant cousin who is always insisting you join their team)

+ Para-Pickleball for beginners (for mobility aid users!)

School is so much more fun when there’s no tests:

American Law - Contracts

Shakespeare’s Life and Plays

Fairy Tales: Meanings, Messages, and Morals

Modern Poetry

World History [Part 1, Part 2]

Learn a language:

Arabic + Resource Guide compiled from Reddit (includes info on different dialects)

Chinese (Cantonese) (audio)

Urdu (frequently recommended course on Reddit) + Resource Guide

Yucatec Maya

[ashtwinproject22]

I know Bethesda has the (well deserved) reputation of creating their games out of hacked together duct-tape-laden spaghetti code on an ancient quirky engine but I feel like FromSoft deserves their fair mention too. Bonfires aren't objects, they're a visual mesh with an invisible NPC standing on top of it that you "talk to" when you want to sit. Tons of enemies are just two NPCs glued on top of one another because they didn't know how to make an enemy have more than one attack that can fire off at a time. Winter lanterns' frenzy buildup attack comes from an invisible guy sitting on their heads shooting you with an invisible gun. Djura doesn't shoot you with his gatling gun, he just sits there doing nothing (with his cape sitting right around his ears due to how the game renders cloth physics from far away) because the actual NPC shooting you is the gun itself. Lothric and Lorian aren't two separate NPCs holding onto each other, they're one NPC with a second, invisible NPC glued to its back that takes damage on behalf of Lothric. Why? Because they couldn't figure out how to make one NPC ride on another one. They straight up went "We couldn't figure out how to make one NPC ride another, so we combined two NPCs into one and then glued another one to its back, simple." Really it's amazing how much of FromSoft's game design is just "we put an invisible guy here to do things because we couldn't figure out how to make the visible guy do it"

Even Elden Ring for all its advancements in mounts and whatnot has hilarious behind the scenes quirks. When Radahn does his meteor attack he doesn't track you, he teleports his horse underneath you and then aims at the horse

[hogans-heroes]

Wake up folks new absolute Legend on TikTok

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

hey can you do me a favour?? Can you go get that nice pristine sketchbook or journal you've been hoarding and put some kind of mark on the first page? Anything will do, like a smudge of graphite or a blob of ink, or perhaps a very scribbly dinosaur. Just put something there. Please, or the dinosaur will be sad.

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

[bioluminescent-fungus]

I was SO SAD for this dinosaur that I grabbed the nearest notebook (a calendar) and drew a little sailing ship for him

[pterribledinosaurdrawings]

oh thank goodness!

[alex51324]

I found him! Here is the dinosaur that will be sad if you don't use your new sketchbook!

[gardenvarietywizard-deactivated]

I've found that if it's still really hard to do this, marking the last page instead of the first helps.

[stormblessed95]

"You Cannot Have My Pain"

- Oathbringer, Brandon Sanderson

The scene made me cry in the book and this guy delivered it SO WELL omg. Dalinar 😭

[classycookiexo]

[capricorn-born]

Oddly specific. Got a deposit for 6,837 today

[weaselle]

fuck it, i never ever do those “reblog for X, this one really works!” posts, but this one doesn’t have any of that BS, this is just straight up wishing us good things; and then the comment doesn’t even say any of that either. Zero claims on this post, all positive vibes

May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love

[vmohlere]

May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love

[onlycosmere]

[tanoraqui]

that theory that the Arkenstone is a Silmaril…it’s doubly implausible, but imagine if nobody knew. If the dwarves were guarded enough of their greatest treasure that…you wouldn’t even need to hide it from that many people, honestly. Mostly a few elves, and all wizards.

and then Bilbo sidles up to Gandalf like, “Thorin and all are holed up in the Mountain, but I think they’re being nuts, so I…kind of stole the Arkenstone, I think.” And (it’s been thousands of years since the light of the trees was doused save for the precious brilliance locked away in Feanor’s gems, since oaths and blood and war that raged until the skies cracked and the earth shattered, and the little people of the Shire have no memory of it at all) he pulls out a fucking Silmaril.

[tanoraqui]

Gandalf: *spittake*

Gandalf: *hurriedly glances at Thranduil. the king of Mirkwood’s eyes shine with curiosity and greed, but not recognition, nor the terrible lust that overtook Feanor and his sons. right, right, he was never in Thingol’s court while the jewel that Luthien and Beren took was there. we’re good. we’re good for now*

Gandalf: That’s, uh, nice, Bilbo. Put it away, would you?

[tanoraqui]

Gandalf, telepathically(?): EMERGENCY RINGBEARERS ONLY CONFAB NOW

Gandalf: [mental image of a goddam Silmaril in hobbit hands, labelled “thisfuckingrockagain.jpg”]

Galadriel, who watched 95% of her family slaughter everyone within 100 miles for several thousand years over these things, including each other and themselves: no.

Elrond, who was very nearly one of those people slaughtered, and did watch most of his town be killed before he and his twin were kidnapped for a while: Absolutely Fucking Not.

Gandalf: Apparently fucking yes. The legendary Arkenstone-

Galadriel: You’ve got to be kidding me.

Elrond: Thorin Oakenshield has a Silmaril right now?

Gandalf: No, no.

Gandalf: Bilbo stole it.

Elrond: *wordless sputtering*

Gandalf: @Galadriel [information packet: BilboBagginsoftheShire.pdf]

Galadriel: Oh yes, Belladonna’s boy, you were telling me about him last winter. 

Galadriel: Btw, orc+warg army probably coming your way. Spotted it in the mirror last night. Thank goodness we dealt with Dol Goldur at least, huh?

Elrond: No fucking shit.

[tanoraqui]

Gandalf @Gwaihir Windlord: hey, sorry to bother you again, I know it’s nearly mating season. but we have a situation again

Gandalf: [thisfuckingrockagain.jpg]

Gandalf: [oncomingorcwargarmy.jpg]

Gandalf: [flashbacktobadasseaglesinwarofwrathhinthint.mov]

[avelera]

I mean, given that Tolkien retconned “The Hobbit” so Bilbo’s little invisibility ring became an ancient piece of jewelry that controls minds and drives the mighty mad, one can at least understand why it seems plausible that the other shiny white gem that destroys empires and makes the mighty go mad with greed could be linked from his kid’s book to his gigantic early mythology in retrospect??

[crazy-pages]

You know this actually explains a lot about why Gandalf didn’t immediately raise the alarm about Bilbo’s ring out of an abundance of caution. I mean, what are the odds, what are the fucking odds, that this one little hobbit stole both a Silmaril and the Ring of Power? Like, you are Gandalf the Grey and you have already dealt with the heart attack to end all heart attacks because this little innocent fool stole a world war inspiring artifact once. You still get flashbacks every time Bilbo offers to show you something and have to employ all of your angel’s serenity and thousands of years of learned composure not start giBbERinG “ pleaseletitnotbeanotherartifactpleaseletitnotbeanotherartifact”. And then. AND THEN! One day he’s like, “hey Gandalf let me show you this neat ring I found back on our journey”. And on the inside a tiny part of you is screaming “nottheoneringnottheoneringnottheonering” while a more rational part of your brain assures you it could not possibly be the one- “It’s this plain gold ring that’s very precious to me and turns me invisible!”

AND THEN YOU FUCK OFF AND SEARCH THROUGH EVERY POSSIBLE TOME YOU CAN TO PROVE IT CAN’T REALLY BE THE RING OF POWER, SAURON’S RING OF POWER, THAT RING, THE ONE RING, LITERALLY EVERY SINGLE TOME, BEFORE FINALLY FUCKING ACKNOWLEDGING THAT THIS SHIT IS REALLY HAPPENING AGAIN

[countesskittymeow]

@shewhodoesnotexist what says you? :P

[shewhodoesnotexist]

I’ve never been a proponent of this theory, but I gotta admit the idea of Bilbo finding two world war inspiring artifacts is alluring ;D

Next you’ll be telling me Sting is Gurthang

[abrownpanther]

Sting may or may not be Angrist, the knife that Beren used to get the Silmarill off of Morgoth’s crown

[pepperonyscience]

I. LOVE. ALL. OF. THIS.

[luffysfakebeard]

there aren’t words for how much I adore Bartolomeo’s intensity of fanboying

[blorbopoll2]

Iconic Tumblr Blorbo : Round 1

MOST ICONIC TUMBLR BLORBO

Miette (From real life)

Shoto Todoroki (My Hero Academia)

Voting ended onFeb 27, 2023

[blorbopoll2]

You FIGHT against Miette?? You freeze her body like a an ice cube? oh! oh! Jail for little man Jail for little man for one thounsand years!!!!