Diggin' Holes, Gettin' Paid

Archeologist and punk banjo enjoyer from the Deep South.

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[blazehedgehog]

[draculaflowdaily]

Hit the gelato papaya, took a sip of the José, everything turned red for eight minutes. Woke up in Geneva. Oh man, I did it again, didn't I?

[phaeton-flier]

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

[phaeton-flier]

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

[theaudientvoid]

[centrally-unplanned]

Regular bears tell stories of angel bears sent by the Bear God, pure white and twice as strong as any normal bear could be, who rule the summit of the Earth and kill all who stand in their path.

And they are right, those bears exist and totally do that. Humans just have fake angels as a cope.

[theabigailthorn]

love the idea of bears being the chosen species actually. having a near death experience and glimpsing heaven and realising it's just full of bears, no humans at all, humans not ensouled actually, humans an accidental byproduct of God's plan for bears

[byjove]

Mormons watching fascist Christian supremacy spread in America: 🥰

Mormons when they are reminded that no one else thinks they’re Christian and practically every other denomination of Christianity hates them: 🥺

[theonion]

Your World. Your Merch. Our Money.

Visit The Onion Store.

[ratbastarddotfuck]

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.

[digitalsymbiote]

Crazy that tech has gotten so bad that we're doing printer forgiveness now

[loveridden1999]

problematic sudoku solving skills gap

[featuringmarkhoppus]

[byjove]

watching massive franchises bomb at the box office while Backrooms has made $212 million on a $10 million initial budget has brought me hope for the future of cinema

[byjove]

audiences do NOT want Star Wars slop, audiences want a movie made by a guy who really wanted to make a movie

[demilypyro]

[demilypyro]

[poupon]

Wow thanks for the ingot man let me just inspect the quality real quick

Dude come on

[theonion]

Find the perfect gift for that special anyone at the Onion Store.

Visit The Onion Store.

[sparrowlucero]

the befouler of our crops

[geniusbee]

these are getting weird

[irondive]

[virtualgirladvance]

[exhaled-spirals]

« True gardeners cannot bear a glove Between the sure touch and the tender root, Must let their hands grow knotted as they move With a rough sensitivity about Under the earth, between the rock and shoot, Never to bruise or wound the hidden fruit. And so I watched my mother's hands grow scarred, She who could heal the wounded plant or friend With the same vulnerable yet rigorous love; I minded once to see her beauty gnarled, But now her truth is given me to live, As I learn for myself we must be hard To move among the tender with an open hand, And to stay sensitive up to the end Pay with some toughness for a gentle world. »

— May Sarton, "An Observation"

[geniusbee]

these are getting weird

[cyle]

one that drives around near where i live has a massive bumper sticker that says “I NOW DRIVE THIS IN SHAME” in big bold red text

[assignedmale]