System of Sapphires

hello there. I'm Sapphire (they/them), an audhd OSDD system and stuff. we like all sorts of creative things. sometimes we share what we make. seahorses are the best animal, second only to dragons. big fan of dropout, drawfee, sanders sides, lotr, the ocean and the creatures in it, the concept of fanfiction. prob more also. I'm working on original writing projects. I have chronic pain. and a lot of stuffed animals (my children). I'm aroace. idk if I'm doing this whole description thing right. DnD is cool. also more recently obsessed with spies are forever and slay the princess. I'm SaphDragon494 on Ao3

[dragonofsapphires]

I watched spies are forever for the first time one year ago today and I am irreversibly changed. I just can't stop thinking about them. plagued by these gay spy brain parasites. at all hours of the day and night. in my dreams. in my subconscious and conscious mind. everything is a reference to them. big fan.

this is art for a fic I wrote but I feel like the art and the fic can be sold separately you know? I mean I am proud of both of them and stuff

[purpleprosey]

it's my birthday. what can i even think about, when i've come so far? years are impossible to summarize, and there's infinite little parts of me that will surely be lost to time forever. this body and brain of mine have lived endlessly and it doesn't feel like i have much to show for it.

another year of nominal "adulthood" for me, and it doesn't fit at all, the amount of responsibilities that i have to face crushes me little by little each day. i don't know what my life will be like in a year, much less a decade, because i still don't know who i am. my sense of self is faltering and my thoughts slip through a sieve no matter how much i try, and i don't think it was always like this.

no doubt i've broken in some way. my passion is barely there, and almost every day i'm longing after Past Me, Past Me who could write and ramble and feel joy in the things she loved. Past Me who got out of bed in five minutes and didn't have to worry about bills or housing or making choices of her own. Past Me who had a guilt complex over failing grades, who was too afraid to paint her nails, who never thought she'd make it past eighteen.

why do i idolize her, try to make myself her, when she'd be starstruck over the simple act of my continued existence? things were so much worse for her then, and although she seemed to possess more strength than i ever will i tell myself that's not true because i still have that strength in making it this far. yet i still miss those days. maybe i never got to grow up in the way i wanted and that's why i give the terrible memories of adolescence - that prison i needed to escape from - so much disproportionate value. maybe i buried it all then and the ramifications are only unearthing themselves now. that sounds about right.

i'm the happiest i've ever been, even if i'm recovering. there might be dreary days and soul crushing nights but the fact that i get to live through them at all, through the eyes of me even if it's only a semblance of me, is invaluable. today i can light my own candles and cut my own cake and make a day out of the trip. time elapsing in itself DOES warrant celebration, after all. i look at myself in the mirror as i see myself change and i smile having this knowledge nestled in my heart.

[ur-favorite-fishgirl]

sex is a distraction from your true purpose in life which is to go to the aquarium and look at the fish and go "wooooooaaah.... fishies". cmon guys we all need to lock in.

[a-silly-poll-side-blog-yay]

would you still be alive without modern medicine? looking back at your life, would you survive without any to the moment where you are now?

yes

no

barely

yes but it would affect me for the rest of my life

results

Voting ended onJun 2

I'd have my knee fucked up forever 🫪 alive but yeahhhhh

[stele3]

I need people to understand that the “No” should be much, much higher. 50% of children used to die before the age of 15, and we just went thru an airborne global pandemic. Everybody say “thank you” to vaccines and antibiotics, without which probably 75% of us would be dead.

[heathertrash10-blog]

Reblog if

It’s 104% okay to come to your DM and just say, “Hi, can we be friends?” And then start asking you random questions.

[dragonofsapphires]

lamprey, lionfish, and shrimp merpeople respectively

[dragonofsapphires]

the Laedie of the Deep

they/them genderless

my pfp now

human diver for scale and lighting

[paperplateprose]

writing challenge!

open up your document and put words in it

[chaos-ducks]

Impossible

[confirmance]

*Mutual reblogs something you posted*

Me: They still like me. Thank God.

[kazoosandfannypacks]

reblog this post to let the mutual you reblogged this from know that you still like them

[dragonofsapphires]

NEW HATCHETFIELD MUSICAL ABOUT MISS HOLLOWAY BACKSTORY HOLY SHIT !!!!!!!!!!

[memesmusingcorner]

Reblog if it's okay to invade your ask box

Always

[shantismurf]

Do you like stories? 📖

Ofc you do!

Do you like writing stories? ✍️

Well, quite likely you do, but chances are maybe you don't always get around to writing as much as you'd like?

Do you know people on Discord? 👾

This one is harder but really, there are a lot of people out there and they aren't all scary, promise.

Then, you should write Stories with People on Discord!! 🎉

"But How??" you ask. 🤷‍♀️

Ofc you ask that bcs what the heck am I even talking about? I am talking about the...

✨Round Robin Storybot ✨

A Discord bot that helps you write stories with friends! Or, at least other people! (Or really you could write stories by yourself as well, that's actually kind of fun.)

Isn't he cute? (Yes, the branch was originally meant to look like the AO3 logo, and no, it's nothing actually to do with AO3, it just started out that way and it stuck. You might see the old logo with the red lines floating around. The bot is super fun to write collaborative fanfiction with!)

The Round Robin Storybot is a robust collaborative writing bot and story relay game that runs relay-style story events where writers take turns contributing entries.

When one writer finalizes their turn, the next participant is automatically selected and notified.

Isn't that fun? (Yes, really it totally is!)

Multiple stories can be run concurrently, and there are many configuration options available like:

- Full story metadata including Rating, with the option of having Mature or Explicit stories routed to a separate, age-restricted channel - Stories can be written in Slow, Quick, or Normal mode for varied complexity and pressure (or no pressure!) - Multiple writer order options: Random, Round Robin (random but everyone gets a turn before it repeats) and Fixed (join order)

Install the bot on your Discord server here:

Add Round Robin Storybot Discord Bot | The #1 Discord Bot and Discord App List

A robust collaborative writing bot and story relay game.

And please join the bot's support server to tell me about how you're using the bot here:

Home of the Round Robin Storybot collaborative relay-style writing tool. Writers take turns contributing entries in turn, adding images or m

I've written this bot as a labor of love for my Hobbit fandom @bagginshieldbookclub Discord server. We've written nine collaborative stories so far, nearly 50k words together! We started out using another bot, Storybot, but I wanted a better turn order than just completely random, and the whole project blossomed from that one desire. It's been great fun to create, and I'm eager to share it with others! If you want to support me but don't have a Discord server, please like and reblog, or share this with others. Thanks! ~Shantismurf

[dragonofsapphires]

canNOT believe that I'm gonna be able to see BOTH poe party AND tomb quest!!!!!! it was super easy to convince my mom this time because we're literally already gonna be in LA that weekend!!! when fate works out perfectly for once........

the ONE time getting my hopes up has paid off 🙏

[dragonofsapphires]

what i miss

soooo most of my poetry is very freeverse, bad rhythm, no rhyming, all venting, to help me sort out my feelings. but sometimes sorting out my feelings does rhyme actually. so. this is about being disabled and what i do and don't miss from when the chronic pain wasn't as bad when i was younger.

I don’t miss people. Well, I do,

but not only them, it’s true;

I miss jumping, running

fighting, hiding...

Well, okay, I never liked to run

but activities used to be fun.

Even some sports in P.E.,

like basketball and floor hockey

and now I’ll never participate

just laying here, stuck in this fate

I don’t miss sunshine

Never liked to be blinded

Always too bright turn it down drown it out

But I miss the wind on my face and in my hands

And A.C.’s not quite the same, nor are all my indoor fans

the air’s still far too still

and I don’t feel the real thing ‘til

the next appointment at the doctors’

‘cause that’s the only time I leave my house

I don’t miss classes

Only the masses

in the halls

Though I recall

getting nervous

around the herds of 

learners

who didn’t take the time to learn my name

just left me alone to my fate

I don’t miss parties

never really went to any anyway

only close friends’ birthdays

fourth of july, new years’, thanksgiving

always sitting in the corner

feeling ignored

and way too bored

wanted to lay on the floor

and dream reality away

fly off into space

I don’t miss standing

not for ovations or whatever

always hurt my feet whenever

I stood on the solid ground

wheeling’s a much easier way to get around

sitting’s more comfy cozy

easy

doesn’t take a ton of effort

stress and leave me wheezing

asthmatic lungs just can’t keep up

always hated standing up

I don’t miss lessons

for my musical devices

my old teachers weren’t all that nice

and I think I’m better off

learning from my thoughts

like how I did with singing

and with most things

only relying on myself

surprised that I turned out this well

I miss moving freely

Not trapped by the feeling

of debilitating pain inside my head

just stuck here in my bed

I miss dancing

leaping, prancing

bringing joy and smiles

god it’s been a while

and it’ll be forever ere

I have any chance of flair

tearing the floor like a hare

didn’t used to matter when or where

I don’t miss people - that’s a lie

gonna miss them ‘til the day I die

not a single day goes by

that i’m not wishing for a friend

it’ll go on until the end

unless someone finds me sooner

and stops by my little room

to keep me company

temporarily

or maybe forever

will that ever

ever happen

I can’t imagine

that it will

I just fill

my days and nights

with cheap delights

that I can reach

don’t let me miss the beach

can’t afford to long for sports

can’t have a passion for fashion

don’t take a liking to biking

can’t be wishing to go fishing

just let me wallow

in my hollow life

don’t bring the light

or the stars at night

please don’t fight

I’ll be alright

I don’t miss

everything

from years gone by

just little things

that catch your eye

details, buttons

playground stuff and

monkey bars 

and cars and stars

and climbing trees

and petting bees

and sitting, standing

stick the landing

karaoke

mud was soaking

through my clothing

when I had energy for loathing

now I’m floating

can’t go boating

trapped in covers

hope hovers

won’t set in

I can’t let it in

can’t believe in an ending

of this pain, no mending

is possible

that awesome thought

isn’t realistic

don’t get it twisted

might never dance

or do a handstand

ever again in my life

wish I savoured all those bites

my memory’s sublime

but it all still fades with time

disappearing to the void

everything that I enjoyed

I don’t miss people...

Yes, I do,

every bit of me misses you

and all your friends

I wish I could’ve known

I’m living now until the end

all alone

I miss company

two or three

friends around me

sleeping over

taking over

the whole house

we’d run about

like little kids

we’d play with sticks

and have such fun

out in the mud

I miss it bad

all the joys that we had

but missing things

doesn’t have to be sad.

[dragonofsapphires]

what i miss

soooo most of my poetry is very freeverse, bad rhythm, no rhyming, all venting, to help me sort out my feelings. but sometimes sorting out my feelings does rhyme actually. so. this is about being disabled and what i do and don't miss from when the chronic pain wasn't as bad when i was younger.

I don’t miss people. Well, I do,

but not only them, it’s true;

I miss jumping, running

fighting, hiding...

Well, okay, I never liked to run

but activities used to be fun.

Even some sports in P.E.,

like basketball and floor hockey

and now I’ll never participate

just laying here, stuck in this fate

I don’t miss sunshine

Never liked to be blinded

Always too bright turn it down drown it out

But I miss the wind on my face and in my hands

And A.C.’s not quite the same, nor are all my indoor fans

the air’s still far too still

and I don’t feel the real thing ‘til

the next appointment at the doctors’

‘cause that’s the only time I leave my house

I don’t miss classes

Only the masses

in the halls

Though I recall

getting nervous

around the herds of 

learners

who didn’t take the time to learn my name

just left me alone to my fate

I don’t miss parties

never really went to any anyway

only close friends’ birthdays

fourth of july, new years’, thanksgiving

always sitting in the corner

feeling ignored

and way too bored

wanted to lay on the floor

and dream reality away

fly off into space

I don’t miss standing

not for ovations or whatever

always hurt my feet whenever

I stood on the solid ground

wheeling’s a much easier way to get around

sitting’s more comfy cozy

easy

doesn’t take a ton of effort

stress and leave me wheezing

asthmatic lungs just can’t keep up

always hated standing up

I don’t miss lessons

for my musical devices

my old teachers weren’t all that nice

and I think I’m better off

learning from my thoughts

like how I did with singing

and with most things

only relying on myself

surprised that I turned out this well

I miss moving freely

Not trapped by the feeling

of debilitating pain inside my head

just stuck here in my bed

I miss dancing

leaping, prancing

bringing joy and smiles

god it’s been a while

and it’ll be forever ere

I have any chance of flair

tearing the floor like a hare

didn’t used to matter when or where

I don’t miss people - that’s a lie

gonna miss them ‘til the day I die

not a single day goes by

that i’m not wishing for a friend

it’ll go on until the end

unless someone finds me sooner

and stops by my little room

to keep me company

temporarily

or maybe forever

will that ever

ever happen

I can’t imagine

that it will

I just fill

my days and nights

with cheap delights

that I can reach

don’t let me miss the beach

can’t afford to long for sports

can’t have a passion for fashion

don’t take a liking to biking

can’t be wishing to go fishing

just let me wallow

in my hollow life

don’t bring the light

or the stars at night

please don’t fight

I’ll be alright

I don’t miss

everything

from years gone by

just little things

that catch your eye

details, buttons

playground stuff and

monkey bars 

and cars and stars

and climbing trees

and petting bees

and sitting, standing

stick the landing

karaoke

mud was soaking

through my clothing

when I had energy for loathing

now I’m floating

can’t go boating

trapped in covers

hope hovers

won’t set in

I can’t let it in

can’t believe in an ending

of this pain, no mending

is possible

that awesome thought

isn’t realistic

don’t get it twisted

might never dance

or do a handstand

ever again in my life

wish I savoured all those bites

my memory’s sublime

but it all still fades with time

disappearing to the void

everything that I enjoyed

I don’t miss people...

Yes, I do,

every bit of me misses you

and all your friends

I wish I could’ve known

I’m living now until the end

all alone

I miss company

two or three

friends around me

sleeping over

taking over

the whole house

we’d run about

like little kids

we’d play with sticks

and have such fun

out in the mud

I miss it bad

all the joys that we had

but missing things

doesn’t have to be sad.

[rimonoroni2]

my general opinion on what people should be "allowed" to portray and what topics they should be "allowed" to explore in fiction is that you can make whatever art with whatever themes you want but i'm also allowed to think the way you handled it was tasteless and should've been done differently. my negative opinion on your handling of sensitive topics is the price of admission for publicly showcasing your work. this is not a pro-censorship stance because i am not The Government

[joy-haver]

So many things would be better if doctors could just say “yeah that is a real problem but there isn’t much we can do to treat it so our only real recommendations are other things that raise your general health level to compensate”

instead they just say “thats normal” or “oh theres nothing wrong with you”. Because in their mind “it wont kill you and i cant fix it” means its not worth mentioning.

Affirm the problem doc, it wont kill you. Knowing that something just isnt the kind of thing doctors treat will save your patients so much time, money, and stress, all of which will improve their health.

[vergess]

I was going to link to that essay about how med school beats this out of doctors, complete with clinically diagnosable PTSD in 20-40% of doctors depending on field.

But then I went to collect the link on duckduckgo since I don't have my bookmarks at work, and oh god, there's actually thousands of these essays, and even studies now.

So uh. I'll synthesize a bit here:

Doctors need to stop doing this, yes. But for that to happen, med school has to stop punishing this with public humiliations, residency has to stop punishing this with extra shifts, and employers have to stop firing doctors who admit this for "malpractice liability."

The individual doctors sending their patients home ignorant and afraid are the last leg in a long chain, basically.