Manda's Path

I'm Manda, 29, Australian. Have a nice day!

[farmlesbians]

it’s talking heads kermit friday

[ghsot]

everyones got that fic they chip away at like michaelangelo sculpting david. and brother? its penis month

[ghsot]

asked my friends if they knew what i was referencing and they said no. we all know that post where someone divided how long it took michelangelo to sculpt david by it's size and went "yuuuuup. whole month spent on penis" right. sure, my search history is full variations upon "michelangelo penis month tumblr" to no avail, but we all know it. right.

[itriedonce]

Hi, that was a MBMBAM bit. But i see you and i hear you and i dont know if someone already said something

[ghsot]

oh my god youre right.

[desinteresse]

Talking to friends with inept parents is crazy. No wonder they’re like this if their parents kept fumbling

[desinteresse]

“I’m having trouble adapting to my adult responsibilities” well no wonder, nobody raised you 😭😭😭

[desinteresse]

Hot tip for future parents: you actually have to guide your kid to adulthood. Feeding them and waiting for them to grow up is not enough since they are not house plants. A little more thought and care is required.

[mosssreblogs]

for those lacking certain "adulting" skills, especially things around the house, check out:

mom, how do i...?

and dad, how do i...?

^ there are tons of other resources but these two will teach you some personal hygiene, home or apartment repairs, easy recipes and basic cleaning techniques, even how to schedule doctor's appointments

if youre a renter i cannot recommend the trans handyma'am enough, mercury is a lifesaver, and her channel and accounts are always accepting new questions

there are so many resources, a lot that you dont have to even ask for, just know how to look 🩷 much love

[undying-princess]

they're executing the count from sesame street for violating the masquerade

[shymikka]

Okay, here's the thing. Count von Count is absolutely a vampire, we know this. However, he's on a children's show. A very popular one. One that we all, collectively as a society, firmly believe is 100% real.

But we all, again as a society, accept at some point that it's secretly not real. It's a fiction for children that we all say is real but actually isn't. Count von Count is a real vampire, and at the same time he cannot be a vampire, because he's on a show for children that is only pretend real. We all want him to be real, but we all know at a certain point that he isn't.

He is the Camarilla's long con, their best psyop. He is the only vampire allowed to publicly breach the Masquerade every day, because by doing so, he is making the Masquerade that much more believable. People who claim that vampires are real have to deal with others saying "What, like the Count on Sesame Street? Suuuuee, buddy, vampires are real...and they count things..."

If Count von Count was an actual threat to the Masquerade, he would have been blood hunted decades ago. And Jim Henson and Sesame Street would have been quietly disappeared. But the Justicars know that he's doing his part to ensure that the Camarilla's Masquerade is doing what it needs to.

[himbocorgi]

I like to imagine these two dated.

[trapny]

This is also him

[conspiracy-frog]

What if Erid invented intergalactic fast travel

I don't support Eva bashing that's emotional support environmental terrorist right there. What I'm interested in is the bad pr she is giving earth because the eridian ambassador is too invested in his flesh teddy bears life

[sidecast-text]

incredibly elaborate bit me and @iclimbtreestofeelalive came up with while i was playing pokemon Y iii couldn't pick if i should put this on the art blog but whateverr hello if you scrolled down this far sorry for the long post okay i love you

[thebibliosphere]

The kid next door (talking toddler age) is playing outside and just wiped out in his Fisher Price car, and I just heard the babysitter say, “oh no, your insurance premium is definitely going to go up!” And the kid who had only been mildly sniffling before made the most confused, but startled sound you’ve ever heard.

Just very clearly an attempt at saying, “my what?”

He straight up forgot about his scraped knee and is now worried about whatever the fuck an insurance premium is.

[xxxdragonfucker69xxx]

[in-a-mellow-tone]

Fuck it, post lamb stew slow cooker recipe

[in-a-mellow-tone]

[in-a-mellow-tone]

How high was I last night?

How much lamb stew did I want to make??

1,814¾ lbs of Lamb????

[beemovieerotica]

>960 cups beef broth >2 bay leaves

the unfathomable power of bay leaf

[apolladay]

Which notorious English class short story fucked you up the most?

* I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream

*The King in Yellow

* The Lottery

* The Masque of the Red Death

* The Monkey’s Paw

* The Most Dangerous Game

* The Nameless City

* The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas

* There Will Come Soft Rains

*The Yellow Wallpaper

* The Veldt

* “you think those were fucked up? What about [X]!”

Which notorious English class short story fucked you up the most?

I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream

The King in Yellow

The Lottery

The Masque of the Red Death

The Monkey’s Paw

The Most Dangerous Game

The Nameless City

The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas

There Will Come Soft Rains

The Yellow Wallpaper

The Veldt

“you think those were fucked up? What about [X]!”

Voting ended onApr 30

[it-grrl]

Okay I have things I should be seeing to but I couldn't help myself. In case you, like me, have not read all of these stories and would like to be amongst the lucky 10,000 today:

I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream by Harlan Ellison

The King in Yellow by Robert W Chambers*

The Lottery by Shirley Jackson**

The Masque of the Red Death by Edgar Allan Poe

The Monkey's Paw by W.W. Jacobs

The Most Dangerous Game by Richard O'Connell

The Nameless City by HP Lovecraft

The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas by Ursula K LeGuin

There Will Come Soft Rains by Ray Bradbury

The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman

The Veldt by Ray Bradbury

Honorable Mention from the comments/reblogs:

All Summer in a Day by Ray Bradbury

*note: this is actually a collection of short stories and clocks in at about 72k words

**Originally published in the New Yorker in 1948; interestingly, the New Yorker still has this story archived on their website BEHIND A PAYWALL. CAN YOU IMAGINE.

[enki2]

[hylianengineer]

@copperbadge this seems up your alley

[copperbadge]

If the system ain't broke, don't fix it, I guess! Accounting may not be the oldest profession, but someone had to keep the books for them.

I mean, in theory I know that Excel is based on the structure of earlier accounting technology that's been around for hundreds of years -- what do we think we did to track commerce before computers? -- but it still kind of blows my mind to, for example, look at my ancestor's journal from a whaling voyage in 1770 and see spreadsheets in the back.

[charaznablespeteevee]

[chillyfeetsteak]

a few doors down from me my neighbors have a squirrel bar nailed to the tree in front of the sidewalk, not exactly this but something like this:

it's been there for years and they never "stock" it so it's just sitting there. anyway, i thought it would be cute to make a little squirrel out of sculpey and leave it on one of the stools in the middle of the night. i also made a little sculpey beer bottle with its own label.

it lasted exactly one day and now it is gone. it didn't fall off, i stuck it on with tape. what do you think happened to it? your most fantastical and wrong answers only, please

[chillyfeetsteak]

HUGE NEWS HUGE UPDATE

squirrel REAPPEARED today... NOW PAINTED

[chillyfeetsteak]

i wanted to provide another update because there has been more activity at the nut bar

a few weeks ago i sculpted a new patron:

and put him in the bar. the next day he was gone. a couple weeks later he reappeared painted... but with ANOTHER new guest: a 3D printed squirrel based on the first one i sculpted (with a bottle!)

:)

[cricketcat9]

Sometimes I love Humanity

[coldasyou]

bojack horseman really treated hollyhock loosing a large amount weight from being secretly drugged as something bad and unhealthy and not as something with a silver lining bc she was now thin and then had her gain the weight back with no one making comments about how that was “unhealthy” and appropriately showed the fact that she was traumatized by the event and not secretly grateful other shows CAN NOT RELATE 

[sidlingmooselike]

And this is the same show that showed another character hesitate to take medication to treat her severe depression because of the risk of weight gain and then showed her, after agreeing to take it, fat and happy and mentally healthy and loved by her partner for the rest of the show. It wasn’t a temporary change to make a point then back to status quo, she got fat and stayed fat and the narrative told us it was better for her to be fat and healthy than thin and depressed or dead. And her weight wasn’t a punchline! It just was how she was now.

Truly this show was doing some things.

[sweaterkittensahoy]

These two are a married couple. They never wanted kids. Diane gets pregnant. They still don’t want to have kids. Diane gets an abortion. At no point is the abortion blamed for any issues in their relationship. They agreed to it together, and that balloon made me laugh so hard I nearly had an asthma attack.

[wolfythewitch]

all all all

[railroadreverie]

found this on reddit you know what i have to do

[railroadreverie]

[railroadreverie]

[railroadreverie]

[railroadreverie]

[railroadreverie]

[railroadreverie]

[starkid256]

[metropolitanmutantofark]

[kokica1]

Love that Ryland Grace is the opposite of so many male protagonist "heroes" in media and yet he's still so incredibly brave, resilient, and strong. That flimsy little science teacher saves the day.

But he also,

Throws fits when things don't go his way. Not a "I'm a bad bitch" destroying everything-type fit, but tossing a trash can, breaking a screen-type fit.

Cries. A lot.

Pleads. He begs.

Doesn't answer the call to action.

Shows weakness. Being a coward and being fearful are two things he defines himself with.

Doesn't end up with the girl. In fact, that girl isn't even interested and he isn't, either.

Cherishes friendship over a romantic plot or something stereotypically brave like, "I'm going to save Rocky so I can save his world." No, he wants to save his friend, first and foremost.

Squeaks. He squeals. He screams, loudly and very high pitched. He whines. He complains. He physically struggles to open a jar. He's clumsy as hell. He makes some of the least graceful noises one can make.

Is not afraid to be the primitive species lowkey.

I love him and everything he stands for as a male protagonist. Men need to know that they can be just like Ryland Grace and still be just as much of a hero and a man.

[mteverestaaaaahh]

if the airlock (or just any of this) looks inaccurate, excuse me, I’m an idiot

warning: blood, and Grace frying the ever-loving heck out of his arm