✧Takoyaki Writings✧

Here for a good time AND a long time || REQUESTS: CLOSED

[noppokun]

you’re a fucking hamtaro blogger who the fuck cares what you think. stop making political posts and stick to posting hamtaro memes.

Are you mad that I get more pussy than you?

[klefable]

this website is wildly out of control

[tobiosmilktea]

umpah umpah! smau

— IN WHICH you are a famous author of a hit webtoon that is based off of all your past relationships. after getting green-lit to become a film, the popularity of your project has led for all of your exes back into your life all at the same time.

↪︎ pairing: bokuto x f!reader x iwaizumi

↪︎ genre/s: social media!au, fluff, angst, crack

↪︎ warning/s: crude humor, bad language, and suggestive themes

taglist: (closed!)

。・CHAPTERS ・ 。

[000] — introduction! [001] — uh oh! [002] — oh boy! [003] — nice try! [004] — it’s you! [005] — if you say so! [006] — someone new! [007] — freak out! [008] — we meet again! [009] — new message! [010] — you’re kidding! [011] — it’s a date! [012] — go to bed! [013] — so sneaky! [014] — that’s news to me! [015] — the half of it! [016] — oh come on! [017] — oh honey! [018] — and burn! [019] — suckerpunch! [020] — in vain! [021] — like a storm! [022] — just platonic! [023] — team up! [024] — mission impossible! [025] — kinda smart! [026] — plan b! [027] — trust the victim! [028] — she was mine too! [029] — when the party’s over! [030] — urban mess! [031] — say it already! [032] — rain check! [033] — epilogue!

[memewhore]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

apparently this is a thing in Japan too, and it gets translated as “Mundane Halloween.” There are so photos online and they’re all so good?????

“Person going to work on a windy day"

“Woman who’s having her bang cut but the hairdresser is nowhere to be found"

"Zookeeper in charge of the pandas"

[rainbowismymiddlename]

Here are two more:

"Not pregnant lady when someone yield seat to her on subway"

And my favorite

"Person on thermal infrared camera"

Might share more tomorrow.

[rainbowismymiddlename]

Influencers taking selfies at a gym

Starbucks barista working her ass off on Halloween but gotta keep up that smile

Person who sits on wet paint

Person who's still loading

Boyfriend carrying girlfriend's shopping bags

[lightweightkate]

I love these so much

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Haikyuu Characters and Their Rice Purity Scores (Shiratorizawa Edition)

I’m only doing the characters I think I know the most about lmao. Especially for a team like Shiratorizawa where we don’t actually know much about their private lives, it’s sort of up to the writer to fill in the gaps. Feel free to disagree/comment your thoughts! As always, this is just for fun!

Ushiima: 98. Okay, usually I would say that third years have done more so they’d have lower scores but I truly believe that Ushijima hasn’t done anything that would impact his volleyball performance. He’s got a one track mind and a pure soul.

Semi: 75. He’s handsome and sincere, plus he’s a volleyball player. He has to at least have had one or two relationships that got a lil’ frisky. Not that I think he’d be a fuckboy, but like,,,, let’s just say he doesn’t have a lack of admirers. Plus he’s in a band in the timeskip?

Tendou: 91. I don’t think this man has ever been in a romantic relationship, but he’s crazy otherwise. Definitely drank, probably ran from the police, and just generally has a wild life. To clarify, it’s not that he WOULDN’T do to anything listed I just doubt he’s had the opportunity oop -

Shirabu: 97. Ok, I’m sorry I love this guy but he’s not getting any. He’s just not. Honestly gives me kind of “Ha, I’m not limited by the sin of physical pleasure like the rest of you but also please give me some” vibes

Goshiki: 96. Follows after his mentor Ushijima but probably has taken slightly more risks in his life due to his hubris. He just doesn’t have time for a relationship when he wants to be the ace! Also would never get in trouble with the law, he’s way to scared

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Haikyuu Characters and their Rice Purity Scores (Karasuno Edition)

This is just for fun, my own headcanons take it as you will lol. Here's the thing, I think Karasuno as a team is pretty innocent. I think once we get to others though that'll change (I'm looking at you Aoba Josai). This takes place before the time skip.

Third Years

Daichi: 91. I can see him having maybe a middle school girlfriend who he kissed on the cheek or something, he's got game - but I don't think it went any further than that.

Suga: 87. Similar to Daichi, I think he probably had a not too serious girlfriend but unlike Daichi I think he'd be more willing to go a little further bc he’s a bit more laid back

Asahi: 97. He >>maybe<< held hands once but also he's a teenage boy. But I can't really see him having a girlfriend or serious relationship/getting into trouble with the law. (ALTHOUGH I LOVE HIM)

Kiyoko: 95. I don't think she gave too much thought to relationships (before timeskip) but probably went on a group date or something similar bc she's very gorgeous

Second Years

Noya: 89. This man has NEVER been a relationship but has probably run from the police. Also probably drank alcohol with Tanaka.

Tanaka: 88. Similar to Noya, but bought condoms one time to seem cool and now they sit unused in his wallet, just waiting. They are expired.

First Years

Hinata: 96. He has never been on a date but he for sure checks off 7-11. I just know. No I will not explain myself further.

Kageyama: 97. His brain is full of volleyball and nothing else, but given his time with Oikawa he's probably seen and heard some shit.

Tsukishima: 91. Okay, this is hard because canonically he's popular but I just feel like he never got serious about anything before volleyball besides being bffs with Yams. Probably went on a date before.

Yamaguchi: 97. Let's be real he probably hasn't dated anyone before, and he doesn't seem the type to break the law, hence his score.

Yachi: 96. I think she's probably held hands with someone before, but nothing else. She is very timid generally so it seems unlikely anything else on the list would be crossed off.

who would have guessed sugawara huh

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Tsukishima, Asahi, and Kuroo + a "I haven't been entirely honest with you" prank

If I personally got this text IRL I think I would just Ctrl+Alt+Del on the spot

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Oikawa, Tendou, and Kuroo's favorite conspiracy theories

Okay I lowkey believe all of these oop-

Here's a link to a petition to try and help Britney Spears!

[dreamoftakoyaki]

I really adored your hcs about Bokuto and Ushiwaka asking the reader on a date , they were so cute !!!! Thank you so much for writing ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Awww! Thanks so much! I've honestly been having a tough couple days (college stuff) and lost a bit of motivation to write but this made me feel a lot better. I really appreciate it 🥺😚💕

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Okay, so can I request headcannons about the rest of Karasuno meeting Akiteru? Like, idk, it’d probably be hard to do so idm how long or short it is but PLEASE you don’t understand how much I need to see tsukki getting pissed bc his brother shows up and how the other crows reacttttt

Akiteru suprising Tsukishima at practice headcanons

Note, I am calling Kei 'Tsukki' or 'Tsukishima' and Akiteru just Akiteru. I know they're technically both Tsukishima so I wanted to clarify.

First off, I think Akiteru would be super interested to meet Tsukki's teammates

But he would also want to respect his little brother's space

However, he has this dilemma solved for him when Tsukishima forgets his gym stuff one day

Tsukishima wanted his mom to come but Akiteru was like "I am not throwing away my shot" can you tell I watched Hamilton recently

Warm up had already started and Tsukishima was sitting out without his gear

Have no fear! Big brother Akiteru is here!

Okay so immediately Tsukishima would make a face and run over

He would be like "Thanks" while literally shoving him out of the gym to try and get him out before anyone could see him

But Yamaguchi clearly missed the memo and shouts "Hello" to Akiteru

To which the team would turn around

Pretty much everyone except Hinata and Kageyama would realize this is Tsukishima's brother

They would all start walking over to see what the fuss is about

Meanwhile Tsukishima is still physically trying to force Akiteru out the door

Akiteru elbows him and steps back in

"Hello everyone! Sorry for interrupting practice, I needed to drop something off for Kei. I hope he isn't too much trouble for you all!"

Que the 'WAHHH' from KageHina

Tsukishima can't even make a response he just wants the whole interaction to be over

Tanaka would LOVE to see him embarrassed like this "Aw Tsukki~, where's your snark today"

"Shut up, Baldie", but he'd still be red

Daichi and Suga would introduce themselves to him, Asahi would try and fail to say hello and just end up saying nothing

The second years would just wave while trying to embarrass Tsukishima more

Kageyama and Hinata (more like Hinata) would probably say some shit like "your brother is so mean! How are you so nice?" And Daichi would smack them

After the coaches and everyone said hi, Akiteru would take pity on his brother and say goodbye to everyone

But not before ruffling Tsukishima's hair and telling him what an exciting bunch his teammates were

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Bokuto, Tendou, and Hinata ft. Stupid Thoughts

If you're wondering why Bokuto's is black but the others aren't the answer is I forgot how to switch it back to night mode

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Bokuto and Ushijima asking you out [Hc] (Gender Neutral) + First date headcanons

⤑ requests open! | rules

Bokuto Koutaro

You and Bokuto would have to be friends for a bit before he asks you out

Not because he doesn’t trust you, but because it would take him a while to realize that the has a crush on you and doesn’t just like you as a friend

Akaashi would probably be the one to point it out tbh

But once he realized he would IMMEDIATELY ask

“Hey Y/n! I wanna say I think you’re really cool and pretty and I like you a LOT so would you want to go on a date with me?”

To which you respond, “Of course! What were you thinking we’d do?”

Bokuto.exe has stopped responding

He didn’t think this far ahead

“It’s a suprise! Are you free tommorow after school?”

Of course, you say yes

So now he has 24 hours to plan this big date and suprise you

He agonizes over it with Akaashi for several hours, but ends up deciding to take you out for dinner and a movie

You start the night with ramen from a shop you both frequent with your group of friends

It’s pretty awkard at first ngl, but once you guys eat and settle your nerves you end up chatting the night away

So much, in fact, that you completely miss the movie you were planning on going to and end up watching a horror movie instead

How bad could it possibly be?

VERY BAD IDEA ALERT- it’s the scariest thing you’ve ever seen

Meanwhile he’s stuck in limbo because he wants to show you how manly and cool he is but he’s literally figuratively shitting his pants to whole time

At a particularly scary jumpscare you grab a hold of his hand for comfort

Bokuto: 👀👀👀🥰🥰🥰

Okay, maybe this wasn’t such a bad idea after all

After the date he walks you home and tells you he had a great time

Kiss him on the cheek at the end of the night please and thanks

He totally texts his VB groupchat gushing about it afterwards

Ushijima Wakatoshi

You and Ushijima had spoken a few times in class

He thought you were nice to talk to, but it hadn’t gone further than that

It wasn’t until you got paired up together for a physics project that you really got to know each other

Suddenly, you two spend every day after school in the library together

You could chat for hours and hours about nothing

While he’s not the best at expressing his feelings, he’s definitely in tune with himself enough to know that he liked you

However, he was worried that you only looked at him as a classmate

You are a nice person, after all, what if he misread your affections?

Not that he needed to worry, I mean, look at him

But he decided he’d rather try and fail than not try at all

So, when he found out the local museum was having a limited time physics exhibit he used that as an excuse to invite you out

“Would you like to accompany me to the Sendai science museum?”

“Ushi, are you asking me out?”

“Yes. I enjoy spending time with you and find you attractive.”

Lord knows this can get you flustered without even trying

When you get to the museum you realize that you’re the oldest visitors by a significant margin

Turns out it’s a kids program oop-

That doesn’t stop you two from watching the display and making crafts along with the elementary schoolers tho

After you’re both thouroughly out finger painted, you go to the museum bookshop and grab a bite to eat

You read a picture book about the works of Da’Vinci and he reads the ads in the newspaper that you found at the table

Later that night, he asks permission to escort you home

And the cutie actually offers his arm like prince charming 💖

All in all you have a great time at your first (of many) date with Ushijima

[dreamoftakoyaki]

hello!! could i request headcanons on what kuroo, mattsun, semi, akaashi, and tsukki would do if their s/o experiences a subdrop after a intense night? remember to take breaks and drink lots of water!! thank you in advance

Hello!! First off I want to say thank you for submitting! 

So, I don’t really know what ‘sub drop’ means? I looked up what that term meant but I just don't think I could properly represent it. I personally lack experience in that realm so even if I got the basics down it probably wouldn’t be -good-. If you want, I could do some sort of hungover scenario (that’s the closest thing I could think of) with the same boys or you could submit another request? Sorry for any inconvenience!

[dreamoftakoyaki]

could i ask for mina, tsu, and momo w/ a female s/o who’s quirk is shapeshifting (she has to learn the anatomy of the animal/object she wants to shift into, and if she overuses her she will stay in that body until she gets enough energy to shift back), and one day overuses her quirk while she’s shifted in a dog’s body, so she’s basically a dog for the rest of the day/night; thanks! ❤️

Mina, Tsuyu, and Momo with a female!SO who got stuck after shapeshifting in dog form

⤑ requests open! | rules

First off, I want to say thank you so much for giving me my first ever request! I hope you like it! (•‾⌣‾•)و ̑̑♡

Mina Ashido

First of all, I think she would think it’s hilarious

“What, you can’t switch back?”

“No... not for a while at least”

*Queue her laughing maniacally for 15 minutes*

Once she got over the initial suprise it wouldn’t take long for her to start scheming

So there you are, doing tricks on the street which no animal should normally be able to

Mina is dressed up like a magician and breakdancing

Slowly a crowd gathers around the two of you. People are clapping and someone started playing music from a shop across the road

Essentially, you know have 50 people all grooving around a dog doing stunts on a skateboard and a hip hopping ‘alien’

What a vibe honestly

When the party dies down you have both exhausted yourselves thouroughly, but it’s okay because she buys you ice cream to share on the way back to the dorms

Freaks out about you eating chocolate lowkey

If you wanted to conserve energy, she probably wasn’t the gal to go to

But tbh you had a really fun day and passed out in her arms, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Tsuyu Asui

Tsuyu is kind of animal-like in her own right, so I don’t think she will think of it as ‘cute’ or as novel like Momo or Mina would

Rather, I feel like she’d look at the whole situation holistically

“You’re a dog now?”

“Yeah, for a while at least”

“Okay.”

She’s 100% the type of girlfriend who likes having weekly dates, so you guys will go to your sunday afternoon beach picnic as normal

Well, as normal as it could possibly be given the situation

You used to bring the snacks on these dates, but given your current lack of opposable thumbs she decides to pick some up from 7/11

It was probably a very odd sight seeing a her grabbing snacks with shiba inu trailing behind her holding a basket in it’s mouth

Wait till they see you get out your wallet to pay

She really likes Lofi hip hop and uses the speaker you got her for her birthday to play music

Once you finally get settled she’ll take great joy in feeding you her onigiri

What can I say? She likes helping people

She’d place kisses on your forehead and cuddle as you watch the waves

You chat about your lives and crack jokes until the sun sets

Overall you’ll have a very wholesome and relaxing day with her

Frog gf ftw!

Momo Yaoyorozu

TBH she would love this

Of course she’d be concerned for you but she would also think it’s the cutest thing in the world

“So you’re going to be a dog for the rest of the day?”

“Yes, until I regain my energy”

“Ah I see”, she says, becoming visibly excited

Momo is extremely loving and EXTREMELY rich

So she would absolutely take this opportunity to spoil and pamper you in ways she can’t when you’re in human form

Doggie day spa? Check!

Buying matching doggie/owner outfits? Check!

5-star food brought out on a literal golden platter? Check!

She would do everything in her power make sure you were able to relax and recharge to get back to normal although she may go overboard

She would use her concern for you as an excuse to let you to sleep over

From then on it’s baking, bath bombs, and cuddles!

You’d end the night watching movies in her personal theatre with her holding your paw you both fell asleep

Ahhhhh I’m having a cuteness overload

All in all you would have a great time with her

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Kuroo Tetsurou ft. bad science pickup lines [SMAU]

⤑ requests open! | rules

Another short SMAU! Flirty nerd Kuroo owns my heart. I initially wrote this SMAU with the idea of it taking place after the the timeskip (wherever he may be 🙏), but really you can imagine it being any time. Thanks for reading ❤️

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Hinata, Sugawara, and Tsukishima SMAU with a crampy SO!

⤑ requests open! | rules

Reader is on their period and needs some love! Thanks for reading 💖

[dreamoftakoyaki]

Midoriya, Todoroki, and Bakugo with a quirkless!gn!Reader SO!

⤑ requests open! | rules

Midoriya Izuku

He first saw you while he was jogging on the beach early one sunday morning

You were sitting on a blanket watching the sun rise, and he thought you were one of the most beautiful people he’d ever seen

Next week rolls around and he sees you again, this time you smile at him

It takes a few weeks before you talk, but once you do it doesn’t take long before you hit it off and start dating

You probably tell him about your lack of quirk as soon as he mentions being in the hero course at UA

Being someone who was once quirkless himself, he really empathizes with your struggles

But besides feeling like he relates, he really doesn’t care that you don’t have a quirk

After all, he is more than his quirk and you are more than your lack of one. It’s the person inside that matters!

Although, he does tend to be a bit possesive

But not because of your quirk status! 

Just because that’s how he is as a person

He tries not to be overly protective of you because he doesn’t want you to feel like he’s looking down on you

Sometimes he fails at this tho lmao

Texts you and loves on you 24/7

Loves showing you off to his friends

Tells his mom about all of your dates and she loves hearing about them

His ideal date is going to an amusement park or zoo and spending the whole day cuddling and going on rides together

he will try and kiss you at the top of the ferris wheel but may chicken out depending on how he’s feeling that day

If you’re doubting yourself he’ll pepper you will kisses until you’re reminded how amazing he thinks you are

Overall a phenominal boyfriend 10/10 would recommend

Todoroki Shouto

He first met you at a cold soba shop you work part time at

He thought you were friendly, and in conversation he found out that you’re in class F in the support program.

Despite being in different classes, he finds himself looking for you

He ends up frequenting the soba shop just to spend more time with you, and you give him your number. Once this happens he texts you a LOT

Basically, it’s a lot easier for him to express himself over text and you start to grow closer

You tell him about your quirk status once you start dating

Not because you’re embarassed or anything, but it just isn’t something you think about that often

Todoroki grew up with his quirk being the main focus of his life, even now as a student being a hero and training takes up most of his headspace

So, he actually likes that you’re quirkless because it means he isn’t reminded about his duties and family when hes with you

He likes that your life is completely different than his

Because of this he feels like he can relax and be himself with you

Unlike other students like Jirou, he doesn’t have any hobbies that help him relax, but talking and spending time with you allows him to unwind

You’re really just a breath of fresh air in his otherwise monotonous life

He’s probably pretty secretive about his relationship with you, not because he doesn’t love you but because he doesn’t want you to deal with his friends and family bothering you

It’s mostly his father tho tbh

If you really want to meet his family, he’ll want you to meet his mom first 

she loves you and thinks you’re a sweet SO! btw

His ideal date is going back to your house and hanging out and relaxing with you, but will also go along with any plans you may come up with

But he’s really busy so you go out for dinner dates most of the time

He’s pretty low maintenence as boyfriends go, and loves you very much

Bakugo Katsuki

He met you at the rock climbing gym he usually goes to to blow off steam

One day he saw you on the racing wall beating someone double your size

This intrigues him, so offers to race you next. To his suprise, you win!

You quickly become friends, and you (like many others) realize how fun it is to bait him and get him riled up

Eventually it just comes up in conversation that you’re quirkless

Bakugo is someone who holds a lot of pride in how powerful his quirk is

I mean, for the vast majority of his life people followed him around and praised him for how cool he was

So why is a quirkless person like you able to fluster him so easily????

It would take a little time for him to come to terms with his crush on you, especially given his own personal complex about his quirk

Probably makes jokes about it more than you’d like, but you fire jokes right back and make him blush more than he had in his entire life

But eventually he just realized that he liked you a lot, and that your quirk had nothing to do with it.

Once you actually start dating, he’ll still tease you a bit about it

but if someone else does? Hell no it’s time to get those hands

His friends definitely noticed he was acting strangely nice, and pried it out of him that you guys were dating

When he showed a picture of you to them Kaminari called you hot and now he won’t let them meet you

He’s super protective over AND he’s the jealous type and that didn’t help

On the other hand he’s the type that won’t admit out loud that he loves you until you’ve been dating for a really long time Tsundere 100%

Your relationship is basically the epitome of the “soft for you, but an ass to everyone else” trope and you love it

[dreamoftakoyaki]

How Kenma reacts to his SO! Losing his favorite shirt

Can't get this man out of my head so here's a short SMAU