STFU Eli

Eli | 26 | gay asf gender whatever | #1 Goomy Fan

[berrytart]

quitting my job to be a full time upstairs neighbor. bowling balls are in the mail as we speak

[eilinknight]

My partner used to live on the first floor of a two story building really close to my university and their upstairs neighbours were a bunch of college guys.

And every single evening at roughly the same time - yes, *every. Single. Evening* the Boys™️ would have what we called Gallop Time. We would hear thunderous galumphing back and forth down the long hallway for like 5 minutes straight. Other than that, we never heard them; they were completely silent.

Tl;dr if you want to really nail being and Upstairs Neighbour you should schedule nightly Gallop Time. To confuse and occasionally delight

[000l]

[shrewreadings]

like to charge, reblog to cast.

[guerrillatech]

[revelware]

[vampirecatprince]

[eilinknight]

This is the kinda shit that makes god do a mass extinction event

[mawofthemagnetar]

What do you mean “chat” is now referring to ChatGPT and not twitch chat? What? What? What the fuck? No?

When I address chat I am speaking to a presumed Greek chorus of real human people shitposting on their lunch break, not a machine that devours lakes to covert electricity into slop.

[juniepuppie]

who the fuck is emailing me

[glysreia]

[michameinmicha]

There are posts for explaining your url but i want one for blog title, so ill just make one myself:

Reblog this and tell us in the tags what your blog title means!

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

bungus

[itwashotwestayedinthewater]

welcome to ‘no note bungus’. reblog and you will feel a sense of accomplishment and goodwill wash over you

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

nosferatu? no. tuferatu. no es mi problema.

[quorpiest]

no mi circo no mis feratus

[r-truth]

[gischtglas]

[hybernating-bear]

That's because this is Silmarillion

[the-commonplace-book]

[animentality]

[inthefallofasparrow]

I've found that the best scientific way to get rid of hiccups is to activate your vagus nerve so it relaxes your diaphragm. The way to do that (or just relax your body in general) is with '458'. Gently breathe in for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 5 seconds, then slowly breathe out for 8 seconds. Keep repeating that cycle and the hiccups should stop fairly quickly.

[badpsychicadvice]

If you press/ hold your chest over the heart with one hand, and press your lower abdomen/stomach with the other hand at the same time, you can also activate the vagus nerve.

[laddy-buck]

you can also have someone gently squeeze the back of your neck to reset the diaphragm but it's a bit hit and miss if you don't pinpoint the exact spot

[obi-waankenobi]

@dduane has a sure-fire science-based hiccup cure that's worked every time I've used it. Scaring? Laughing? Drinking upside down? Holding my breath? None of those has worked 100% of the time. But Ms. Duane's hiccup cure? Every fucking time.

[beemovieerotica]

my cure is slowly drinking orange juice while spinning in a circle and it works every time

[eilinknight]

I use the tried and true “I’ll give you a dollar if you hiccup right now” on myself. It’s doesn’t always work because I know I don’t actually have a dollar to give me

[im-literally-so-dun]

Me because I got to witness a major historic event but it was a Good One for once

[centaurself]

in celebration of april 13, i present all four known photos of neil, who banged out the tunes 19 years ago today

source: theagilerat.com (click right to see all four photos!)

[starberry-cupcake]

[frogdrops]

if you like a piece of media that is good eventually youll more or less run out of things to say about how good it is but if you like a piece of media that is objectively pretty mediocre but also somehow deeply compelling thats how the demons get you

[eilinknight]

[to-spirkly-go]

They killed Julius Caesar AGAIN today.

every march 15 in rome they restage the assassination at torre argentina. you know. the literal ruins of the curia of pompey. the exact place where it actually happened in 44 BCE.

and then they put his body on a litter and do a whole funeral procession through the city. with professional mourners and everything. they literally blocked traffic for this.

like imagine missing your bus because rome decided to re-kill julius caesar today.

note: i tried to show in the video how huge the crowd was because there were SO many people. also the last part of the video shows the roman forum, where caesar is actually buried. people still leave flowers there.

[eilinknight]

This is 300x funnier when you know that the ruins of Torre Argentina is now an active cat sanctuary. Just an audience of about 60+ cats watching that guy get stabbed AGAIN

[somewhereovertherainbowtables]

The result of a post I saw on bsky earlier and joking with my friends

[eilinknight]

You laugh but I named my catboy Eli first and then realised I liked it…

[fandom-trash-goblin]

we've got a life to love living.

[teaboot]

advice that has literally saved and improved my life

[whereareyourightnow]

There is a wound that won't heal at the center of the galaxy. There is a darkness reaching like rust into everything around us. We let it grow, and now it's here. It's here and it's not visiting anymore. It wants to stay. The Empire is a disease that thrives in darkness, it is never more alive than when we asleep. It's easy for the dead to tell you to fight, and maybe it's true, maybe fighting is useless.

STAR WARS: ANDOR - Rix Road