"Waltz (ghost and cat)" by Tetsuhiro Wakabayashi
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"Waltz (ghost and cat)" by Tetsuhiro Wakabayashi
Writing tips:
“You feel the bulge in his pants” - implies that you are feeling some guy’s penis, may be sexy depending on context
“You feel the bugle in his pants” - implies that this guy has a military horn in his pants, invites confusing questions like why does he have that and how big are his pockets
Both options convey that he's horny
How dare you be funnier than me on my own post
Every day I handle more money than I will ever make. Every day.
At the start of my employment, my boss showed me videos of people stealing, and we both had a chuckle about it. How silly they were! There was a camera overhead, and it’s not to watch the shoppers. See, we can’t actually stop shoplifters. They get away with it maybe nine out of ten times. But we, who are watched and tallied and witnessed? We are always caught.
At first it was hard to hold one hundred dollars bills. An amount I had never seen before. An amount that didn’t exist in my household. It’s normal now. Here is something that is not for me.
“What the hell, I’ll take another,” says the man, pondering our 200 dollar watches. What the hell. Total comes to 580 and not even a flinch in his face. I have been working for 11 hours today and made only 110 dollars. It will go to my rent. Today I work for free, it feels. When I get my check, I will have 35 dollars left for food and saving.
The six hundreds he hands me go into the cash register. For a moment, I imagine having money. Then I put it away, counting out his change.
I know for a fact we sell our products for double what they are worth. That I could be making commission. That they could hand me those 580 dollars and change my life and not even mark the difference in their checkbooks. He’s not the only sale they make today, but I am the reason they made it. He’s not the only one spending 600 dollars, but if I hadn’t spent two hours with him telling me about his life, he wouldn’t have spent any. I go home. I don’t own a watch.
I have watched and rewatched a video on how to make salmon four ways. My shopping list is always the same. Pasta. Rice. Tuna. If I can afford butter it was a good week. I dream of the world I will never walk in, where I can throw the best fish fillet in the cart with a shrug. I hold hundreds in my hand and look up at the camera. I put them under the cash drawer.
I go to work. I scrap together my savings. I eat my bowl of rice slowly. My manager takes a paid week off from work just for his birthday. He owns a yacht.
I’m not worth the cost of a watch.
i wrote this while i was working at orlando’s walt disney world parks.
i was part of their college program. i moved to the state for it. they legally owned the building i was living in and still charged me rent. i ostensibly was being charged to work for them. it was a 2 bedroom apartment and they placed 6 adult women in it in forced triples.
as many as one in ten disney employees have experienced homelessness while working for the company. despite huge efforts to unionize, strike, or otherwise demand fair treatment; disney has refused to increase employee quality of life.
disney admits publicly that a good portion of their success is because the employees (“cast members”) are dedicated, passionate, and selfless. this is never reflected in pay. even “face” characters (ie those that are princesses etc) make barely above a minimum wage.
at the time that i worked there, i made $8.50 an hour. at one point i was asked to create a human shield around a bag because a bomb dog had alerted to it. for eight fucking dollars an hour.
i now work a very cushy office job. i have bought the salmon and cooked it all four ways.
i go to the store. i am nice to the person behind the counter. she looks up at the camera while she counts out my change. there is nothing fundamentally different about her and i.
we are both worth more than the watch, anyway.
“Because the truth is, tech doesn’t have an image problem. It doesn’t have a message problem. It has an intention problem. What’s wrong with the axe murderer who broke into my house is not that he hasn’t successfully persuaded me to buy into his narrative. What’s wrong is that he’s trying to kill me with an axe. Similarly, when you launch a product that’s designed to put millions of people out of work, block access to sources of verifiable truth, replace human creativity with slop, and lower the barriers to every sort of atrocity, the problem isn’t that you haven’t told the public a good story about those things. The problem is that you are trying to do them.”
— The 40 Most Rage-Inducing Problems in Tech
Occasionally as an Australian you'll be talking to someone from overseas, and you'll discover a common phrase you took for granted is, in fact, not universally known outside of our country.
Turns out casually dropping "fuck me dead" into conversation will give unsuspecting Americans an aneurism.
The more you know.
Imagine being on a work call with an Aussie and they suddenly announce they're gonna blow a load in response to a problem.
Not Aussie but I asked an American once if she was taking the piss ( i.e. pulling my leg, joking. Perfectly cromulent and friendly english expression)
and she got really upset because she thought I was threatening to piss ON her
This is killing me
Rifling through the tags, here's some other terms which are apparently causing mass carnage whenever they escape our borders:
Having a goon (i.e. Sipping on a delightful wine)
Having a gaytime (Eating an icecream)
Having a sticky beak (Investigating)
Take a squiz (To have a sticky beak)
Get stuffed (To express a revelation is most frightful)
Chuck a sickie (Take a day off work due to the humours being misaligned)
Chuck a wobbly (When one's temperament becomes visibly upset)
Carry on like a pork chop (Acting most silly indeed)
Thongs (flip flops)
Hot chook (Pre-cooked supermarket rotisserie chicken, otherwise known as the Bachelor's Handbag)
Fair suck of the sauce bottle (Let's be real)
Shits me to tears (Something is mildly annoying)
Not here to fuck spiders (Expressing a situation is serious)
Having a piss-up (A social gathering)
I'll shout you (offering to goon an old chum)
A cruisy place (a relaxed atmosphere, where one might shout and goon the night away while enjoying many a gaytime in your favourite thongs)
Some usamerican friends of mine recently learned the Aussie meaning of snail trail (the line of hair from the bellybutton heading south). They were horrified to say the least
NO FEAR. The actors who played Long John Silver and Captain Flint in Black Sails FULLY ACKOWLEDGE that the Muppet adaptation was the best
(source)
hi i hope i get to be the one to break this news on Tumblr, because
I am reading Tim Curry’s 2025 memoir, Vagabond
and in it, he not only devotes a chapter to Muppet Treasure Island, but also references this very post
so, to recap
no, Tim Curry is absolutely NOT a Muppet; however
yes, he and Miss Piggy ABSOLUTELY fucked
the best part of field trip experiments is a chance to become THE experiment yourself ;)
i think peak historical fiction is when there is a random ass major historical figure but as a comedic relief side character. like geoffrey chaucer being a naked gambling addict in a knight’s tale or leonardo da vinci being cinderella’s fairy godmother in ever after. like. nothing can top that.
Dame Archer kicks McDougal’s Scots ass there in the rain at the Washington Midsummer Renaissance Faire - August 11, 2018 - Photo by Douglas Herring
Oh NO.
me, a sheltered noblewoman: Pray who is that brave knight? Dame Archer:*turns around* me: gasp! *instantly in love*
Alicia Archer
my bi heart………
I’VE NEVER SEEN THE ADDED PICS
*dies*
Oh shit.
GAY KNIGHTS
Fellas I’m real gay
@0hheytherebigbadwolf HELP!!
Every June this inevitably winds up back on my dash. And I appreciate that. And I will reblog it. Every time.
Hey, it’s @archerinventive, and the Pride Knights!
if only Gyatso had run away with Aang
A once-in-a-lifetime shot — the moon perfectly framed by a rainbow. Caught at just the right time. 🌈 🌕
Sourcing the photos as taken by Mark Ham on Instagram, according to one of the replies.
Happy Pride month to the moon
GUYS READ ALL OF THIS PLEASE PLEASE PL–
some IMPORTANT UPDATES
stay tuned for the resolution
THIS IS WHAT I WAS TELLING EARLIER
A.FUCKI G.REAL LIFE LWJ. A fkn modern wangxian au this is crazy
PLEASE GO ON REDDIT AND CHECK THE UPDATES!!!!
THERE’S MOOOORE
This is a hell of a ride but this is the Queer romance of arranged Marraige actually turning romance and ahhh i love it so much
GOOD FOR THEM!
this is adorable but i’m still just stuck on ‘he keeps crawling into my lap and cuddling and nuzzling me, but i can’t tell if he LIKES ME-likes me, please help’
dude
The reconstructed face of the “Cheddar Man” (c. 7,000 BCE) compared to his living descendant, Adrian Targett
The Cheddar Man is a Mesolithic skeleton that was recovered from England’s Cheddar Gorge in 1903. At around 9,000 years old, the Cheddar Man is the oldest complete skeleton ever discovered in the UK, and has long been hailed as the “first Briton.” DNA analysis on the Cheddar man from 2018 indicated that he was lactose intolerant, had light-colored eyes, dark brown or black hair, and had a dark to black skin tone. Although the discovery of the Cheddar Man’s dark skin tone was surprising for both scientists and the public alike, it corresponds with recent research suggesting that genes linked to lighter skin only began to spread about 8,500 years ago - approximately 32,000 years later than what was previously believed.
In addition to the development on his skin tone, the Cheddar Man surprised scientists in 1997 when DNA analysis revealed that he had a living descendant - a retired history teacher named Adrian Targett. Targett and the Cheddar man share the same mtDNA, which is passed down from mother to daughter. In other words, they share a common maternal ancestor. What is even more remarkable is that Targett lives in Cheddar, only a half mile away where his 9,000-year-old ancestor was discovered.
Targett was not invited to the initial reveal of his ancestor’s new facial reconstruction, but he has since seen it and has commented on the family resemblance. “I do feel a bit more multicultural now,” he once joked in an interview “And I can definitely see that there is a family resemblance. That nose is similar to mine. And we have both got those blue eyes.”
The development of the Cheddar Man’s skin tone has generated resistance, especially among far-right and white supremacist circles. Targett, however, is unbothered by it, stating that it is “marvelous what scientists can reconstruct once they sequence the DNA.” When asked if he thought whether the findings affected the way people think about race, Targett responded: “Yes, I do think it’s significant. Not many people in Cheddar mind it. But the lesson is that we’re all immigrants, whether you’ve been in a place for 10 minutes or 9,000 years. We’ve all come from somewhere.”
Source! This is real wow
https://www.theguardian.com/science/2018/feb/09/hes-one-of-us-modern-neighbours-welcome-cheddar-man
I love it
The first brit is black
I’ve heard of staying in the same town your whole life, but this guy’s on another level.
Incredible tweet
German car giant with Nazi-era roots pivots to defence production as the industry struggles to compete with China
source link
Volkswagen is considering plans to convert one of its German car factories into a production hub for Israel’s missile defence systems, the Financial Times reported on Tuesday.
The carmaker has held talks with Israel's Rafael Advanced Defense Systems about repurposing its Osnabruck plant, shifting from vehicle production to manufacturing components for Israel’s Iron Dome system.
The move underscores growing pressure on Germany’s automotive sector, which is struggling to compete with Chinese electric vehicle makers.
It also carries historical resonance: during the Second World War, Volkswagen halted car production and switched to arms manufacturing for Nazi Germany.
The proposal points to a wider shift, as parts of German industry move closer to defence production with support from Berlin.
every major structural social problem right now is basically "we don't have enough skilled workers on the ground" and the reason is always "well we've been intentionally underpaying and understaffng them for decades to increase corporate profits" and somehow the news always just mentions the "shortage" without digging into the cause
air travel is a mess? shortage of air traffic controllers - for some mysterious reason
logistics a mess? shortage of truck drivers - for some mysterious reason
public transit can't meet demand? shortage of bus drivers - for some mysterious reason
We even mysteriously have shortages of doctors, nurses, teachers... FOR SOME MYSTERIOUS REASON
FUCKING PAY PEOPLE AND HIRE ENOUGH STAFF
Yes and: Make education more affordable and achievable!!
The destruction of public and higher education and the degradation and subjugation of workers has been an active part of conservative policy for more than fifty years.
Related: when conservatives say "no one wants to work anymore", what they mean is "no one wants to give up a substantial portion of the fruits of their labor in order to enrich an idle capital-holding class".