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twilight saga: new moon

POV: ur a Forks high school teacher forced to meet with the uncannily pretty local cult leader, and his wife, to discuss their kids’ grades🧛‍♀️

Carlisle and Esme at a parent teacher conference. Thank you to my patrons who voted for this concept.

stydixa

The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009) Dir. Chris Weitz

dailyflicks

TWILIGHT 2008. Dir. Catherine Hardwicke

anbloodmoon-blog

anarcho-vampirism

I love this scene. it’s one of the more subtle examples of eddie boy letting down the human charade/being himself around bella. like bella is all huddled and staying dry but edward is just fucking dripping, like he isn’t even trying to stay dry. because it doesn’t matter to him! he can’t get cold, who cares if the rain soaks him to the bone. and hey it’s probably the same temperature as he is, I bet it feels nice.

the-golden-onion

I love this interpretation cus you’re absolutely right, Eddie wouldn’t care about the rain in canon. But this is so funny to me because in the commentary Catherine talks about how they built this rain cave and it was just completely coincidence that Kristen sat in the random dry spot but Rob got drenched, and I crack up every time I watch it, look at how miserable he looks while Kristen is sitting pretty haha

bellasdumptruckass

esme adopting a “Wine Mom” persona for a decade just to spice up her life and fit in with human women

bellasdumptruckass

trlake-deactivated20200421

what’s the pink they put in pink lemonade that makes it so poppin

craigzlist

that’s pussy babe!

doubleca5t

now THIS is a world heritage post

stonerbella

Me reading twilight for the first time and trying to picture the extremely specific cars smyer described:

the-golden-onion

honestly most of the car breed knowledge I have came from Twilight

bellaauroraswan

Okay but the worst part about twilight cars, from someone who does all of her own mechanics work on her car:

Smeyer obviously doesn’t know much about cars either. I’m pretty sure she just googled “fast cars” and then used a top ten list generated by Car and Driver (because how else would she know about that). Because here’s the deal: if someone wanted a really fast car, and they had a lot of money to buy them, they’d be buying specialty cars that have been tricked out, not off-the-belt Volvo’s and BMWs. The only excuse that I can think is that maybe the Cullens just like the look of these cars, and Rosalie makes them into specialty cars (like in midnight sun)… but again, for someone who knows about cars, I can’t see them choosing a BMW (they aren’t very reliable). Honestly, Edward’s Aston Martin Vanquish is the only car that really makes sense, and even that’s a stretch.

Oh, and the Audi Bella drives in BD? It’s fake lol, it doesn’t exist. Sure, it’s based on real cars, but it’s not real. Missile proof glass? Come on, smeyer, chill.

the-golden-onion

I drink to forget the missile proof glass