How Did I Get Here?

Theo | They/them | 21 | trans aroace

[otrebot]

Transfem Peter Parker drawings I forgot to post

[lakevida]

everyone seems to be doing quite well

[fuckhugeoctopus]

For years, sci-fi has asked, what if aliens were wetter than us. Project Hail Mary posits a new, daring question. What if we are the wet aliens

[cafffine]

woke up this morning, rolled over, and very confidently tried to blow out my alarm clock like a candle. absolutely no precedent for that.

[wizardshark]

In the year 1450 a priest rolls over and slams his hand into his candle, burning him and sending wax flying all over the place

[megamindsupremacy]

surely this is a sign that there’s nothing in particular wrong with the atmosphere right now

[hersurvival]

[melodies-stereo]

i dont care how many beautiful trans women Wizards of the Coast sends at me, i am NOT playing magic the gathering

[hymneminium]

#oh my god did gallagher just discover the term dank this is so exciting #does he know it's a weed thing?? there's no way right

Of course Peter Gallagher knows that "dank" is a weed thing. He also knows that "in heat" is a sex thing and that when aliens "probe" someone it's in the anus.

These are words, not things. Heathcliff is a comic about symbols.

You're never going to get a comic where an alien actually probes someone any more than you're going to get a comic where the Man-Eating Giant eats a man. You're just going to get a dozen comics where aliens like the word "probe".

Heathcliff wears the ham helmet because it's the helmet you wear when you eat a ham. You can tell it's that helmet because it says "ham" on it. The helmet's function is determined not by its form but by its label.

summer = beach = sand = desert = mummy and thus there is the Summer Mummy. Because of symbolic associations that do not otherwise cohere.

Robots don't wear clothes but the mere act of labeling them "nude" makes them nude. And once a painting is a nude painting there has to be a fig leaf because a "nude" without a "figleaf" is "indecent".

A "ham" is a ham even when it's a car. A yam can be a ham can be a car because "yam" sounds like "ham". Symbols have overtaken things.

[hymneminium]

Jimmy is Heathcliff's attempt to manipulate these symbols.

popularity = billboards, popularity = charity fundraising, popularity = influencers. But standing underneath the word "influencer" has failed to make Jimmy popular. Why is this?

[vonspe]

figuring out a manticore :o

[rexhistoria]

people act like this college shit is hard but i used AI to generate me a medical license and have bee ndoing surgery on newborns for 6 months

[earthmovers]

[vintage-tigre]

[sufjansjoy]

does anybody know how to get out of bed. or be a better person

[sufjansjoy]

wow

[sanlorenzoherald]

good morning

[sztupy]

[thatlittleegyptologist]

You’ll need the link!

Who wants to help Cards Against Humanity f*** with Elon Musk?

We got Musk off our land. Let's build a monument to remind him he's a sad little b**** with no friends.

[ashleeabutton]

Not all heroes wear capes, sometimes they publish questionable card games

[depsidase]

[m4d-minute]

[jabberwockypie]

Me: I don't know, maybe I was overstating how bad my migraines are to the neurologist. :-/

My best friend:

[jabberwockypie]

#THIS BITCH #do you know how many times a week this winter she got a migraine??? #Or this spring? #THIS SUMMER? #CALL OUT POST#between this and 'well maybe I don't have asthma and am just choosing to wheeze for aesthetic purposes' #I will be inflicting one million 'well maybe I could talk if I just tried harder' DON'T TEST ME (tags via @arinrowan)

Arin did you just turn MY post into a callout post?

[arinrowan]

Crawling out of the well of deep tumblr for the purpose, yes

[jabberwockypie]

#for every note this gets op has 1(one) day where she's not allowed to say maybe her disabilities what disable her are fake or made up (@arinrowan again)

I don't think you can do that?

[arinrowan]

Can I do that?

Yes

No

Remaining time: 8 hours 9 minutes

[camilieroart-reblog]

Op I have migraines what the fuck is the clinically significant number of migraines post and can I have it please for I am Concerned™️

[arinrowan]

tl;dr if you have more than 4 bad headaches a month the International headache society recommends going on preventative medication to treat it. Yes, four a month. No, it still counts if you have to think really hard if your migraines are 'bad'.

edit: if you only have 'one' headache that lasts for four days, THAT STILL COUNTS AS FOUR.

[girlsnighteverynight]

[anarqueeen]

Bouncy balls are kinda bullshit cuz they're all these different fun colors but they all taste the same