batlantern rights!

saf. 22. brucehal please

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It's easy to picture the kinds of fights Clark and Lois would have with Jon about Bruce's parenting,

Jon: Bruce let's Damian go on patrol with him all the time!

Lois: Well maybe if Bruce had an inkling of a regular childho-.

But it becomes increasingly funny to throw Hal in the mix;

Jon: It's not fair! I'm the Super and Damian spends more time in the air than me!

Lois: Maybe if Bruce watched his carbon foot print Damian wouldn't be taking fifteen minute private jet rides-.

Jon: Who said anything about Bruce? Hal let's Damian test planes with him every Friday!

Clark: Oh for Rao's sake!

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#WayneVegasWedding Part 1

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okay but Brucie™  Wayne getting hitched to a hot test pilot from Coast City just fits the✨lore✨, no one is really shocked especially when they see Hal.

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Bruce *i can never truly punish my kids cause theyve already been through so much* Wayne x Hal *they're teenagers, either you run them or they run you and my track days are over* Jordan

~

Bruce: -of all the idiotic, dangerous stunts! Over forty injured, five in critical condition, and we almost lost two civilians in the field today! You are hereby banned from patrol for the foreseeable future! From now on it's the manor and school and that's it! I hope the free time will give you some space to reflect-.

Hal: *coughs*

Bruce:...no phone, no tablet, no laptop, no electronics outside of the family computer room-.

Hal:*coughs*

Bruce:-you'll also be helping Alfred around the manor since your nights will be free-.

Hal:*coughs*

Bruce:-you'll be front and center for the galas and fundraisers next month-.

Hal: *coughs*

Bruce:- for the next three months! And you can forget about joining Hal in space this summer!

Hal: *thumbs up*

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BruceHal: *screaming at each other in the middle of a League mission*

Bruce: Maybe if you had a mature bone in your powerade fueled body- 

Hal: Well maybe if you weren't such a colossal dicknugget then-

Justice League :This is just so unhealthy, can you imagine what the fights are like in private? Those poor kids constantly being exposed to this.

Meanwhile, the batkids:

Jason: *gagging* We get it y'all love each other sheesh.

Duke: *covering Damian's eyes and ears* They’re kids here! Get a room and stop flirting in front of everyone! 

Dick: Your mating ritual is scaring the League. Keep the sexual tension down plz for the love of god.

Cass: *reading body language* Bonk, horny jail?

Tim: *gravely* Yes, bonk horny jail.

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BruceHal have designated sides in their California king bed, Bruce gets the right side so that he can have a clear visual of the door and Hal gets the left side which is closer to the heater. Bruce is notorious blanket thief/hog/menace and this way Hal doesn't freeze to death due to Gotham’s unpredictable weather every time he sleeps over.

This side/spot designation carries over into almost every room in the Manor. There’s a Bruce side and a Hal side. Living room? Bruce’s spot is closest to the Batcave and Hal’s spot closet to the kitchen where he can sneak food and annoy Alfred and not necessarily in that order. 

When Hal is off-planet, Alfred, the batkids and Bruce all avoid the left side of the bed and all other Hal associated spots like the plague. If Hal’s side of the bed is unmade, it stays that way until he gets back, even if it’s months later. Hal left a cup on a table? It stays. ( This dedication gets to the point where other Leaguers start wondering if they missed a funeral. Damian once threw a turkey leg at Clark for sitting in Hal’s spot in the living room.)

Hal likes to comes back and see physical evidence of his presence in the manor and the batfam all like to leave as many physical reminders of Hal’s existence as possible when he’s away. 

[yeats-nana]

Hal Jordan, who graduated on top of his class from U.S. Air Force (which requires both your grades and physical condition to be perfect) and is best test pilot at his current company, Ferris Air: I have an emergency backup plan.

Bruce Wayne, a college dropout from Princeton in economics of all departments: I'm suprised you can come up with a plan.

Hal, left eye starts twitching: Are yoU FUCKING KIDDING ME-

[canon-adjacent]

Hal Jordan, Air Force test pilot: So...the Batwing is a Wayne Enterprises test jet? Heh, are you Bruce Wayne?

Bruce Wayne, unaware of Hal’s credentials and suddenly defensive: Get that off a conspiracy board? How would you know if my plane was a WE jet?

Hal Jordan, test pilot for Ferris Air, a Subsidiary of Wayne Enterprises: Because I flew it, asshole, I even took up WE’s CEO for a test run...wait a minute, holy shit, you are Bruce Wayne!

Bruce, just remembering that he chose to use this plane because of Hal’s reccomendation: well...shit.

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BruceHal are incredibly cuddly with each other but they both genuinely think that the other is the cuddlebug in the relationship. 

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Bruce working on the Batcomputer by himself, Hal walking by “Look at him, he can't be left alone for 5 minutes without looking pathetic." So Hal combats this by draping himself all over Bruce's back, meanwhile Bruce is thinking " Look at him, he can't even leave me alone to work for 5 minutes." Obviously they both secretly love this 'clinginess' but would rather die than say it.

[enticeless]

BruceHal are incredibly cuddly with each other but they both genuinely think that the other is the cuddlebug in the relationship. 

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[justhaljordanthings]

#JustHalJordanThings – Having a slammin’ booty. 

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Love the thought of BruceHal getting soooo used to sleeping together in the same bed that when they go on missions, its alot of tossing and turning in their separate allocated rooms until one of them (read:Hal) sneaks into the other’s room. Now take in the glorious mental image of these two 6ft + and 180+ lbs grown ass men sharing a single bed because they don’t know what it means to sleep apart anymore. 

[lost-piero]

Could i request some cute batlantern? and or superbat? or all three???

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