#batlantern headcanon

[haljordangetpregnant]

I just think it's neat if half of Hal's stomach gets blasted by a beam, but he decides it's not important enough to fix, so he just walks around eating half of what he used to, and no one really notices. But of course, Bruce does.

Bruce has the same problem sometimes, but unlike Hal, he cannot afford to let his body lose its natural functions because it would be counterintuitive in the end.

So Bruce does not overreact or interrogate Hal.

Bruce just asks whether Hal needs help finishing his meal and watches as Hal dumps half of the man's pancake onto his plate and calls it a day.

A man who eats only half and a man who eats more than an average guy.

I just think they would suit this dynamic that I pluck from elsewhere a lot, haha.

[greenlanternnerd]

One day Hal realized he had a degree in aerospace engineering and Bruce didn’t have a degree at all and Hal hasn’t shut up about it ever since.

[enticeless]

BruceHal: *screaming at each other in the middle of a League mission*

Bruce: Maybe if you had a mature bone in your powerade fueled body- 

Hal: Well maybe if you weren't such a colossal dicknugget then-

Justice League :This is just so unhealthy, can you imagine what the fights are like in private? Those poor kids constantly being exposed to this.

Meanwhile, the batkids:

Jason: *gagging* We get it y'all love each other sheesh.

Duke: *covering Damian's eyes and ears* They’re kids here! Get a room and stop flirting in front of everyone! 

Dick: Your mating ritual is scaring the League. Keep the sexual tension down plz for the love of god.

Cass: *reading body language* Bonk, horny jail?

Tim: *gravely* Yes, bonk horny jail.

[haljordangetpregnant]

Hal is either a light sleeper or too stubborn to sleep at all, and he would stay up until his brain cannot physically stay up anymore, so he would fall face down onto a flat surface and pass out. Even when he passes out, Hal still has a layer of defence in his mind that would wake him up to perform his hero duty.

But whenever he's with Bruce, Hal can fall asleep more easily, somehow. He once suspected Bruce drugged him, but even Bruce wouldn't stoop that low (he would) to get him to sleep more.

Deep down, Hal knows that Bruce would never hurt him, and he would protect him, and that he would protect this world just fine when Hal is sleeping, but admitting to that would mean admitting that Hal trusts Bruce deeply, and it's a little bit embarrassing for him.

Eventually, when Hal and Bruce are finally together. Hal starts to sleep more and more. Sometimes he would fall asleep in the middle of dinner or even while talking.

But it's fine.

Bruce would always make sure that he could still wake up to a shining sun, anyway.

(And if there's a problem, Bruce would definitely wake him up in time)

Oh, and Bruce? He just has chronic amnesia lol, there's no fixing that. But he does enjoy having somebody accompanying him during the night, even if that person does nothing but sleep on his couch in the Batcave with no care.

Just having the knowledge that Hal can sleep peacefully is enough for him to ease his mind on most days.

[greenlanternnerd]

I see you have joined the bat lantern nation LOL any headcanons???

I’ve been in BatLantern nation a bit longer than I’ve had this blog actually! I just recently went onto the tag and started reposting tf out of everything but I’ve always been a fan! And I have a couple of headcanons.

Alfred and Hal bond over their respective Air Force days

Since Hal uses his ring for pretty much everything and he’s off planet so often, he’s basically an old man with tech and the Batfam, mainly Tim and Bruce, have to help him navigate it

When Hal first saw all the batkids in one room unmasked near Bruce he was convinced they were all biologically Bruce’s kids and he kept tryna reassure Bruce that he can admit they’re his kids

The whole family gets space joy rides obv, most of which Bruce doesn’t approve of

Tim had tried stealing and testing on the ring before

They’ve made their relationship public as heros and civilians but in order to keep anyone from suspecting it’s them they made two personas/stories for public and hero relationship. In public it’s Brucie Wayne and his ‘California himbo’ test pilot sugar baby, as heros they’re a bitter divorced couple who force themselves to get along for the sake of Duke who they’ve somehow convinced everyone is their biological child with each other

Dick loved their relationship during his Robin days because Hal was his dad but also his two best friends (Wally and Roy)’s uncle

[haljordangetpregnant]

I think it's the norm that Bruce is pale af and Hal is tanned, or as I like to say, has honeyed skin. Natural sunlight, he's very active, never in doors, sunglasses are his only defense against the sun

But I also think it would be funny af as a headcanon that-

Hal and Bruce are now official and Hal retires a little bit, letting the younger GLs do the work and he partially moves to Gotham for convenience.

And after 6 months he's fucking paler than Bruce.

He looks like he's only 2 digits away from the skintone of the Spectre. He can practically glow a little bit in the dark but there's a small chance it's just the radiation from Gotham's water.

The fact that his actual skin tone is lighter than Batman would ruins him spiritually. It crumbles his beliefs in himself. And it robs from Hal a part of him that he never knows existed but he has been taking if for granted.

Now Hal finally knows the reason behind the existence of the "tanning" industry.

Hal used to tease Batman all the time about being as pale as a ghost but honestly only one of them has been a dead dead ghost with ashy-white skin for years so who's Hal to be judgmental, really?

[haljordangetpregnant]

yello sorry for spamming you by liking everything you post while I wasn't here Im back with my whole new manic era and sleppleness. God I'm scared

Anyway!

Everyone knows cinnamon roll/ can kill you thing (btw Hal looks like a "looks like a cinnamon roll bit can kill you" but actually a cinnamon roll. Like yeah he looks like a cinnamon roll but can kill you but it doesn't change that he is a cinnamon roll!!!!) and it could be for cat/dog person thing

Got it right? I'm not talking bullshit right?

Like looks like a dog person, actually a cat person or opposite

NAYWAY EVEN IF I COULDNT TELL U STILL GOT UT SO PERFECT

Now imma talk

%99 of pet owners are Karen's and that's the truth, they don't understand that a living creatures and treats them like decors. Lol narcissist parent behavior

Cutting cats claws and furs? Their literal body parts? Cats skin can't control their fucking temperature, yeah human skin can but cats skin? NO! They need their fur for that. And there are real alive humans who cut their dogs tails for aesthetics. Are? I mean? What? Is it even?

So let me talk more

Dogs are complicated creatures. Idk why the media likes to make them stupid happy creatures. They are so not understand by everyone it hurts. If a dog is showing their teeth, it's not an "awww it's smiling 😊" you dumbass, it's their way to say "I'm about to fucking bite you, you bitch" and then human get crazy because "it got crazy from nowhere" go to where came from, and I mean your mom's womb, be unborn please. It doesn't mean "dogs can't be happy cuz they don't smile" no??? They got tails you know. A dog wing their tails when they're happy, like waving, like "hiiiiiii🤗🤗🤗🥰 I'm here and I would like a head pet!"

And other hand cats aren't that complicated, it's just a yes or no for them. Yes they do have a whole new language just like dogs did, but you can just go with yes and no and you'd be fine. Just know how to hiss and great you passed the cat language finals. Like a two dimensional mind. You wanna do something then you do, if you don't then you don't. This is the why most people are unable to pet stray cats, when they need to leave they'll be like "bye bye pretty creature" and cats don't understand your words they just see your "🥺" face so they follow. If you stop petting a cat and just leave they'll be like "pet time over? Yuck. Okay" Once I hissed Mine (the stray cat that I decided she's mine) for trying to enter my apartment and since she didn't try again.

Okay talking time over hc comes up

Hal looks like a dog person but he's actually a cat person. He's also a cat-like person, he would push objects just to watch it fall and then act surprised when it fell.

While Bruce is the opposite, he looks like a cat person with all the "black cat energy" but he's a dog person. He's not emotionless he just has a wholeass new language for his emotions. He will love you even if you don't return that love.

And yep again, dogs can love their owners even if they hate them. Cats won't, they stop loving them too. Cats be like "to you too" and dogs having a whole Lana del Rey episode.

I had more but my brain died byee

HAHAHAHA YEa, yea hahaha I GET IT

I have a dog too, but my dog's surprisingly independent, almost like a stereotypical cat. If he doesn't want to stay in my room, he will leave. He doesn't even want people touching him when he is resting. Good thing people are scared of his appearance, so they do not pick him up and make him uncomfortable, like how small dogs are often treated. Except for me tho, I think I annoy him too much on a daily basis that he just accepts that he cannot rest properly next to me, but he likes to rest right next to me anyway, so that's a tsundere dog, I guess

Honestly, I think it fits! Bruce already has a dog anyway. Dogs are typically more high-maintenance and clingy and I think Bruce can afford to take care of them. He will not miss a dog's feeding time or jogging if he can help it. I think he already has plans in case he cannot. But I also think Bruce likes cats, too but he's just not well-liked by them LOL Bats are mice with wings, take that if you will.

I think Hal wouldn't actually own, own a cat, he's too busy for that but rather a neighbor stray that he lets in when it's cold or raining. He buys food for it, toys for it, but never calls it "my cat". I think he likes cats more because cats are not demanding of him like dogs, which he cannot give. Cats are more independent; they can hunt on their own if they must. And Hal wouldn't feel burdened by them. He can just die at any moment, and they would be fine. And personally, I think if Hal dies in his apartment, he would want his cat to eat him to stay alive, lol. I also think every cat sees itself as Hal's owner and not the other way around, lol Cats like him. Look at Sin haha. Like the cats would be worried sick since he's always away, he always looks malnourished, he can never bring meat home, he always looks ungroomed, like Hal can literally reverse-psychology the cats and it's his power

So Bruce adopts dogs, but cats adopt Hal.

[enticeless]

BruceHal are incredibly cuddly with each other but they both genuinely think that the other is the cuddlebug in the relationship.