Of Doctors and Dragons by BodhrĂĄn M.
The assurance kept bouncing around Sixâs head as he climbed up the grassy slope. The man had looked quite serious as heâd said it but had added with the wisdom of a scholar that he didnât think that was going to dissuade him.
And he was right, Six thought with a touch of pride, heâd never been stopped by the threat of carnivorous creatures before. And he had a lovely scar on his left leg to prove it.
Come to think of it, he also had a scar in the small of his back from a manticore⊠and another under his third rib on the right side from a gryphonâŠ
Ah, well, that was life. Couldnât expect to get through it without some bruises, right? Besides, heâd quite enjoyed all three of those excursions.
Apart from the actual getting mauled, of course, but you couldnât have everything.
Anyway, Six had heard a lot of stories about dragons and heâd never actually come across a confirmed case of a human being devoured by one. It was always a case of someone whoâd heard it from someone whoâd heard it from a merchant whoâd known of someone vanishing mysteriously near a dragonâs lair. You never got to the source, exactly.
Sometimes, heâd wondered if the story had been made up by the dragons themselves just to get some peace. That made some sort of sense, he lied to himself.
But then again, those devoured didnât often get to tell the tale.
Six shivered, half from horror and half from delight. This was the fun part, the little moment before all hell broke loose and things got really interesting.
And this was when things got really interesting.
Cresting the hill, he was suddenly met with the vaguely disturbing tableau of four heavily armed, thickly padded figures all levelling nasty looking rifles in his direction.
He froze where he was, lifting his hands high into the air. Â âOh,â he said, trying a charming grin. âI think I may have gotten a bit lost.â
They didnât lower their weapons. One â the smallest â ratcheted the pin of their gun in a meaningful manner. âState your business.â
Sixâs grin got wider. âMy nameâs Six,â he said, âanâ âm lookinâ for a dragon.â
The tallest lowered their weapon and stepped forwards. Their face was completely concealed by a black hood and scarf, but they dug in their pocket and retrieved a cigarette of some kind. Some careful manoeuvring of the various materials later and they had it stuck in their mouth and lit.
Six thought about applauding, but he also quite liked having a head and all his limbs. So, instead, he just waited to see what theyâd do.
âWell, you found it,â the tallest figure said. Their voice was quite high for their size and Six suspected they might be a woman. They gestured behind them to a gaping shadowy maw of a cave, leading into the hill and â presumably â underground.
âSo, I am in the right place. Can I go inside?â
The smallest guard â he was guessing, but he felt confident enough about that title that he would have bet money â shook their rifle threateningly. âWhy?â
Shrugging, which was surprisingly difficult to do with both hands above your head, Six said, âI just wanted to see if the rumours were true. Talkinâ to a dragon â thatâd be somethinâ to tell the grandkids, wouldnât it?â
The end of the cigarette flared red as the tallest guard inhaled. âAnd would you,â they said, smoke curling around each level word, âbe concerned if I told you that it eats people?â
He thought about it for a moment. âI dunât know,â he replied, honestly, ââcause I dunât know if thatâs true. What you just told me.â
âWell,â Six began, âyou asked if I would be concerned if you told me that the dragon eats people. Not whether I would be concerned that it eats people. Can I put my arms down now? Theyâre gettinâ tired.â
The guards looked over at each other, seemingly in a bid to work out what heâd just said.
Normally, this would be the point where he ran away, but they didnât seem like they were going to shoot him immediately. Or at least, shoot him anywhere immediately fatal. It was an important distinction to make in times like these.
And also, he was having tremendous fun.
âWell, it doesnât matter what I tell you,â the tallest guard finally said, âbecause it doesnât change the fact that it eats people. And yes, you can put your arms down.â
Sixsmith pulled a face and let his arms drop to his sides, careful not to reach anywhere near his pistol. âWhoâd it eat?â
âWhoâd it eat? Presumably, someone from here, right?â
The smallest guard lifted their gun again, shaking it in his direction and said the very words he was hoping to hear. âYou ask too many questions.â
He shrugged, secretly rejoicing. That phrase was only said when the speaker either didnât have â or didnât want to give â the real answers.
Six liked mysteries. They did usually mean he had to cross a town off his internal map after the locals chucked him out on his ear, and he typically picked up a few physical mementos, but they were usually worth it.
But a dragon who ate people (but never anyone the accusers could actually name), a mafia of doctors and armed guards seemed just exactly the right amount of unexplained madness to be interesting.
He thought it was about time he did what he did best.
It was time to stick his nose in and see who tried to cut it off first.
Six slipped into the busiest pub he could find and took his subtlety off at the door.
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