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@flaminhotlem0n
𝑊𝑒𝑙𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑦 𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑙𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑙𝑑 ₊˚⊹♡⋆
ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ — all my works, organized & ready to read
ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴍᴇ — a little about who I am & what I love
ʀᴇǫᴜᴇꜱᴛꜱ ᴀʀᴇ ᴏᴘᴇɴ!
i mainly write for nct, stray kids and riize! but i can write for other groups and idols, if i feel comfortable
𝐍𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 — 18+ only, enter if you dare!
heyy are you doing alright?? I'm waiting for the sion wonbin anton fic but you can take your time ❤️❤️
heeeey baby!! im doing alright, thanks for asking
my new job is sucking my energy AND time, but i promise im posting this fic soon. its 80% done so im not gonna take that long to post, I PROMISE!
here to also say i would 100003093098% read an anton sion wonbin fic PLEASE <33333
👅👅🫦🫦
you guys are crazy and i love it!!!!!! and im gonna post it tomorrow 🤞
YES 100% YES I WILL READ A 4SOME SMUT W SION ANTON AND WONBIN 😭😭😭😭😭😭
🫦😈🤤😏
then get ready bae, cause i’ll do it!!!!!!!!!!!
and im posting this week
a random question: if i write a foursome with sion, anton and wonbin…. would you guys read it? 👀👀
heyyy can you write a smut abt anton (with plot lol) tyyyy<3
🗣️🗣️🗣️ OF COURSE!!!!! i actually have a lot of smut already written for anton in my notes (im addicted in writing for him) so im gonna choose a very good one for you anon 🫶🏻🫶🏻
but if you want a specific plot, you can send to me in the ask and i’ll make it happen
𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧
genre: smut mdni
wc: ~850
pairing: sungchan x afab!reader
cw: explicit sexual content, explicit language, protected sex, dirty talk
thanks anon for the request!
not proofread!
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you probably shouldn’t have come over. or at least, you shouldn’t have brought that damn massage oil. but here you are, sitting on the edge of sungchan’s bed, watching him lie face down, shirtless, his broad back stretching like it knows you’re watching. he buries his face in a pillow and lets out a dramatic sigh.
“can’t believe i actually convinced you to do this”
“you’re taking advantage of our friendship” you say, flipping the oil cap open and rubbing a bit between your palms “just because i said you looked tense”
he chuckles, low and boyish, the sound muffled in the sheets.
“don’t be modest. you offered, remember? with that ‘i’m a pro at relaxing massages’ attitude…”
“maybe i am. now shut up and enjoy”
you sit beside him and press your warm, slick hands onto his back. his skin is hot under your fingers, muscles twitching slightly as you begin to knead from his shoulders down to his lower back.
“mm… fuck” he groans, voice heavy “that actually feels so good”
“told you”
you circle your thumbs near his spine, trying to keep your breathing steady. but you’re not calm. not even close. the scent of the oil mixing with his skin, the way his back moves under your palms… it’s making you restless. and the silence between you is thick with tension.
“were you always like this?” he asks suddenly, voice low
“like what?”
“good with your hands. or is it just me?”
you bite your lip, smirking.
“maybe you inspire me”
he laughs, slow and a little rough. then he turns his face toward you, just enough to lock eyes.
“that’s dangerous, you know?”
“what is?”
“you, sitting on my bed, hands all warm and sweet, touching me like that… acting like we’re still just friends”
your hands freeze for a second. the silence drops heavy between you. then, he slowly turns over, lying on his back, chest rising and falling under your gaze. his eyes, darker now, don’t leave yours.
“tell me you feel it too” he says, barely above a whisper “tell me i’m not imagining this shit”
you lean over him, your hands resting against his bare chest.
“i feel it. i’ve felt it for a long time”
his breath hitches, almost a moan. he reaches up, fingers sliding around your waist and up to the back of your neck, pulling you down slowly. the kiss is messy, heated, urgent. tongues colliding, lips parting, your hips settling onto his lap where you can feel him already getting hard.
he groans into your mouth, gripping your hips tighter.
“you have no idea how many times i imagined this. you, on top of me, pretending to be innocent while grinding like this…”
“maybe i’m not pretending” you murmur, rolling your hips over the bulge in his sweatpants.
“and maybe you’re gonna kill me if you keep moving like that. off with the shirt. now”
you don’t hesitate. as soon as the shirt hits the floor, his eyes devour you. he sits up, kissing your chest, your stomach, unbuttoning your shorts painfully slow.
“condom” you whisper between kisses.
“always” he breathes.
he grabs one from the drawer and tosses the wrapper beside you. then he strips you fully, climbs over you, lips dragging down your neck, over your chest, down to your waist.
his fingers slide through your folds, teasing you.
“fuck… look at this. you’re already dripping for me”
“your fault”
he chuckles, then leans down and starts licking you, slow and deep. you gasp, arching into his mouth, fingers tangled in the sheets.
“say my name, baby. let the whole damn building know who’s making you cum”
“sungchan… fuck—”
when he slips two fingers inside you while sucking your clit, you completely lose it. you come hard, shaking under his mouth, moaning without shame. he doesn’t stop until your body begs for air.
“now it’s my turn” he mutters, sitting up and sliding down his pants. he rolls the condom on while keeping his eyes locked on yours “ready?”
“come fuck me”
he pushes in slowly, deeply, groaning as he fills you.
“god, you’re so fucking tight…”
“then fuck me already, stop talking—ah—”
and he does. hard. fast. with rhythm and hunger. one hand on your waist, the other squeezing your breast, his voice all gravel and filth in your ear.
“ride me like that… yeah… just like that…”
“harder… deeper…”
“you like being fucked by your best friend, huh? you like it rough?”
“i love it. love when you use me like this… ruin me, sungchan…”
the second orgasm hits you even harder. you cry out his name as your whole body trembles, and he follows right after, burying himself deep as he comes into the condom with a deep, hoarse moan.
you collapse side by side, covered in sweat, catching your breath. after a while, he breaks the silence.
“this is gonna change everything, huh?”
“it already did”
“what if i say i want it to change… forever?”
you smile, pulling him close.
“then tomorrow… i’m bringing more oil”
⊹ ࣪ ˖ 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝑶𝒏𝒆 𝑫𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏'𝒔 𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐬
──────────────────────
ㅤ♡ ꜱᴍᴜᴛ 𐙚 ꜰʟᴜꜰꜰ 𓍯 ᴀɴɢꜱᴛ ⏾ ᴅᴀʀᴋ ᴛʜᴇᴍᴇ ✦ ꜱᴇʀɪᴇꜱ ❀ ʀᴏᴍᴀɴᴄᴇ/ᴅʀᴀᴍᴀ
──────────────────────
more stories coming soon…
01. last first kiss 𐙚 - sion (nct)
02. truly, madly, depply 𐙚 - seungmin (skz)
03. change my mind ❀ - shotaro (riize)
Hiii, can you do a sungchan smut pls pls pls?? I love your writing so much
yes yes and YES!!!!!! and i already have a good plot hmmmmmmmm (i actually have a half written smut with him, so i might finish rn)
from:sion smut anon
thank you so muchh I love you 🥹🫶🏻
love u too!! hope you liked the story
I have tons of stories that it’s like, 90% done, but instead of actually finishing them, i keep writing more things for sion cause i can’t help i love him and i’m obsessed.
i wrote a very fluff one with him that includes ryo and sakuya and its a very very very cute story and a litte suggestive cause why not? 🤷♀️
and i’m also writing a 3some smut with him and mark cause why not again?? 🤷♀️
𝐑𝐔𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐄
genre: smut mdni
wc: ~1000
pairing: xiaojun x f!reader x hendery
cw: threesome, explicit language, explicit sexual content, pwp, oral (f and m receiving), slight degradation, overstimulation, double penetration (anal)
not proofread!
──────────────────────
you hadn’t expected this.
two sets of hands. two mouths. two voices whispering your name like a prayer and a threat at the same time.
xiaojun was behind you, warm breath on your neck, his hands sliding under your shirt with slow, possessive confidence. hendery was in front of you, lips curled in that filthy smirk, dragging his fingers along your thighs as you sat between them on the bed, already aching.
“you don’t know what you’ve gotten yourself into, do you?” hendery murmured, eyes locked on the way your lips parted. “two of us, one of you. think you can handle it?”
xiaojun’s voice was lower, darker. “she’s shaking, and we haven’t even started.”
a sharp gasp escaped your lips as xiaojun’s hand slid between your legs from behind, fingers pressing over your panties, already soaked. you tried to grind down, desperate for more, but he held your hips still.
“nuh-uh” he whispered, voice like silk. “you only move when we say.”
hendery leaned in, his mouth brushing yours but not kissing you yet. “you’re dripping, baby. just from the idea of being used by us. you want it that bad?”
you nodded, barely able to breathe. that was enough.
xiaojun slipped his fingers inside your panties, dragging them down as hendery finally pressed his lips to yours, hot, rough, dominant. your moan was swallowed by his mouth as two fingers slid inside you from behind, curling with perfect precision. xiaojun groaned low in your ear.
“fuck, she’s so wet. she was made for this.”
hendery pulled away just long enough to watch you squirm.
“get on your knees, princess” he said, already unbuckling his belt. “open that pretty mouth for me.”
xiaojun didn’t stop touching you as you dropped to the floor between them, your knees hitting the carpet. hendery stood in front of you, cock already hard, thick, flushed, and ready. he fisted the base, guiding it to your lips.
“you take him while i stretch you out” xiaojun murmured behind you, his tongue replacing his fingers, licking long and slow between your folds. “let’s see if you can keep up.”
you moaned around hendery’s cock as xiaojun’s mouth devoured you from behind, wet, hot, relentless. hendery hissed, threading his fingers into your hair and holding you in place as you took him deeper, drool dripping down your chin, your thighs trembling from the pressure of xiaojun’s tongue.
“look at her” hendery growled, hips bucking gently into your mouth. “fucking perfect. our filthy little girl.”
xiaojun pulled away only to thrust two fingers back inside you, fast and rough now, his voice breathless.
“she’s clenching. she’s gonna cum already.”
and you did. hard. loud. shaking with both of them groaning at the way your body gave out, soaked and twitching.
but it wasn’t over.
hendery pulled out of your mouth with a pop, grabbing your jaw.
“on the bed. now. ass up, baby. we’re just getting started.”
xiaojun’s hand was already gripping your hips as you crawled onto the bed, thighs still trembling, breath uneven. hendery dragged your panties the rest of the way down, groaning when he saw the mess between your legs.
“she’s ruined already” he muttered, dragging two fingers through your wetness and bringing them to your mouth. “taste how fucking desperate you are.”
you sucked them in without hesitation, eyes burning as xiaojun climbed onto the bed in front of you, stroking his cock, thick and flushed, tip already dripping.
“come here” he said, voice low and hungry. “mouth on me while he fucks you.”
you wrapped your lips around him slowly, tongue swirling around the head, savoring the salty taste and the way he groaned deep in his chest. his hand slid into your hair, guiding you at his pace. slow first, then deeper.
behind you, hendery didn’t wait. he lined himself up and slid in hard, one deep thrust that made you choke slightly on xiaojun’s cock. you moaned, drool running down your chin, tears pricking your eyes as hendery picked up a brutal rhythm.
“fuck… she’s tight.”
“and her mouth feels like heaven” xiaojun hissed, thrusting gently into your throat.
their voices surrounded you.
“such a good girl for us.”
“taking both our cocks like she was made for it.”
“look how fucking messy she is.”
you were dripping down your thighs, every nerve set on fire. hendery pulled out suddenly, making you whimper, but he just chuckled darkly.
“she’s not done yet. you want him too, right, baby?”
you nodded, barely able to speak. xiaojun pulled out of your mouth, dragging you onto his lap, lining himself up.
and then he filled you, inch by inch, deep and thick, stretching you in a way that made your eyes roll back.
“that’s it” he whispered, pressing his lips to your ear. “take all of me.”
then you felt hendery again, behind you, hands on your ass, spreading you wide.
“ready to be really full?”
you gasped, nails digging into xiaojun’s back as hendery pressed slowly into your second hole, careful, teasing, until both of them were inside you at once, stretching you open completely, overwhelming your senses.
you moaned brokenly, body caught in a mix of pleasure and overstimulation as they both began to move perfectly synced, deep, hard, relentless.
“fuck” xiaojun groaned. “she’s shaking.”
“feel that?” hendery growled. “she’s gonna cum again.”
and you did, again and again, each time more intense, body clenching around both of them, sobbing from the pleasure.
xiaojun was the first to lose it, groaning in your ear as he spilled deep inside you. hendery followed seconds later, hips slamming into you one last time as he came with a curse, heat filling you to the brim.
you collapsed between them, completely spent, your body twitching, your mind hazy.
hendery kissed your back, chuckling. “you’re wrecked.”
xiaojun brushed the hair from your face, gently. “still breathing, angel?”
you gave a shaky laugh.
“barely.”
and then hendery smirked, licking a drop of sweat from your shoulder.
“good. because round two’s after the shower”
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TAGLIST: @feet4liferss
𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐃𝐈𝐎 𝐒𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍
genre: smut mdni
wc: ~900
pairing: idol!sion x idol!f!reader
cw: explicit language, explicit sexual content, kinda frenemies with a lot sexual tension
thanks anon for this request!
not proofread!
──────────────────────
the dance studio was dark and humid, the floor absorbing the muffled sound of footsteps. the mirrored walls reflected everything: your panting body, strands of hair stuck to your forehead, skin glistening under the bluish lights. the clingy top no longer felt like clothing, it was a second skin, barely hiding the arousal written in every movement.
and then, in the corner of the room, his shadow appeared.
sion.
the annoying presence. the damn provocation that never gave you peace.
“here again at this hour?” you asked without turning, eyes still fixed on the mirror. “don’t you have a home?”
“i do. but i prefer it here.” his voice was low, lazy, and dripping with desire. “i like the view.”
you turned slowly, gaze dripping with disdain, or at least you tried to disdain.
“you’re an asshole.”
he stepped closer, slowly, like he knew you wouldn’t run. like he knew you couldn’t. his gaze ran down every inch of you sweaty body.
“and you look beautiful like this…” he stopped inches away, breath hot against you face “… bet you already ready for me.”
you swallowed hard, inhaling the scent of his woody cologne mixed with sweat. the heat between you was suffocating.
“we shouldn’t” she whispered.
“i couldn’t careless about it”
and with a firm pull at your waist, yours bodies collided. mouths met like they’d been waiting for days, weeks. he pressed you against the mirror with his entire body, one hand grabbing your thigh and pulling it up, grinding you against the already hard bulge in his sweatpants.
you moaned softly into the kiss, and he smirked against your lips.
“that’s it. let it out”
his hand moved down the back of your thigh, reaching the waistband of your shorts. with controlled roughness, he yanked the fabric down along with your underwear, leaving you exposed. the cool air of the room touched your damp skin.
you braced one hand on the mirror, trying to keep balance. with the other, weakly pushed at his chest.
“fuck you, sion.”
“oh, i will. but you first.”
then, with just enough pull of his pants and boxers, he freed his hard cock. gripping your waist tight, he positioned himself and slid the head between your wet folds, rubbing slowly over the entrance.
you gasped loudly.
“stop teasing.”
“say you want it” he whispered, lips brushing your neck. “say you want my cock stretching you open”
you bit your lip, eyes fluttering.
“just fuck me already.”
he chuckled darkly, and the next second, slammed into you.
the impact sent your body forward into the mirror, hands splayed out, trying to steady yourself. the sensation was so intense that a loud moan escaped you lips.
“keep moaning like that and i might fall in love with you”
his thrusts were rhythmic, deep. the sound of skin slapping filled the studio, mixed with their heavy breaths and muffled moans. the mirror was fogging up, smudged with their hands and the heat radiating off their bodies.
you felt every deep stroke, every thrust hitting the perfect spot, making your vision blur.
his hand slid up and tangled in your hair, tugging your head back slightly, forcing you to look at your reflection.
“look at us, look how pretty you look like that” he ordered. “all mine”
you couldn’t respond. only moan.
“sion, if someone comes in…”
“no one will.” he brushed his hips against yours. “and if they do… they’ll get a fucking show.”
you moaned even louder, and he gripped you waistharder, hips slamming with faster, rougher thrusts.
the heat in you stomach climbed fast, and he knew it. knew it by the way you ground against him, desperate, trying to take him deeper, faster.
“you’re close, aren’t you?” he murmured. “i feel it. you’re trembling.”
“sion… fuck…”
“come for me. now.”
and you did.
forehead pressed against his, body arching, muscles clenching tight around him. sion groaned low, almost growling, continuing to move until he followed seconds later, hips pressed hard against yours, his breathing ragged on your neck.
for long moments, all that remained was silence, except for the heavy breathing and the sound of sweat dripping onto the floor.
he pulled out slowly, adjusting his clothes, and looked at you panting, eyes half-lidded.
“that’s what you get for training alone,” he said with a smirk.
you turned, still shaking.
“that’s what i get for you being a bastard.”
he leaned in, kissing the corner of you mouth.
“ah y/n, next time, try not to moan so loud, the rookies are practicing next door and the room is pretty echoey”
you turned slowly, throwing your shoes at him
“son of a bitch”
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TAGLIST: @feet4liferss
hiii loves!! I’m gonna write a 4 chapter story inspired by the ‘first love’ series from nct dream (my first and last; bye my first; love again; to my first).
which member should I write this story for?
mark
renjun
jeno
haechan
jaemin
chenle
jisung
✨ Taglist Open! ✨
Hi, loves! I decided to organize my taglist for anyone who wants to be tagged in my fanfics.
My taglist is open for: NCT (all units), SKZ and RIIZE
If you’d like to get notified whenever I post a new story, just leave a comment with the member or group/unit you want to be tagged for!
If you want to be tagged only for a specific genre, let me know.
I’ll keep everything updated and organized! 🫶
𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐌 𝐎𝐅 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍
𝐜𝐡. 𝟐 - 𝑮𝑹𝑬𝑬𝑫
wc: ~2000
cw: explicit language, explicit sexual content, mild manipulation/control, psychological tension
not proofread | next chapter soon
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you didn’t remember how you got home.
the lights of the club were still dancing behind your eyelids when you woke up. the taste of tequila and cigarettes still lingered on your tongue. but what truly scared you… was his scent. still on your skin. still on your clothes. still clinging to you like he wanted to claim territory.
taeyong.
that was the name your body repeated, even when your head screamed to forget.
you should’ve called the police. should’ve reported what you saw. but you didn’t. not because you were scared — but because, deep down, you didn’t want him to get caught. you wanted to see him again. you wanted to understand. you wanted to dive deeper.
you were falling.
and he knew it.
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two days later, he showed up. unannounced. uninvited.
he knocked on your apartment door like he had the right. like he owned the place — like he owned you.
when you opened it, your stomach dropped.
taeyong was wearing a dark leather jacket, sunglasses, his expression cold as ice. behind him, a luxury black car parked on the curb. engine running. doors open.
“are you gonna play hard to get or get in?”
“how do you know where i live?”
he calmly took off his glasses, his eyes locked on yours.
“y/n… i know everything about you.”
your blood ran cold. he was serious. and somehow, that turned you on even more.
──────────────────────
the car smelled like expensive leather and danger.
you sat in the passenger seat with sweaty palms, your heart pounding unevenly. taeyong said nothing. just drove. the radio played soft instrumental jazz, muffling the tense silence between you.
he took you to the rooftop of an abandoned commercial building. you climbed dark staircases, the sound of footsteps echoing off the walls. when you reached the top, the sun was starting to set. the city stretched below your feet — chaotic, loud, full of secrets.
“why here?”
“because from here, i see everything that’s mine.”
you turned slowly.
“you have a thing for possession?”
taeyong smirked.
“i have a thing against losing what’s mine.”
“and i’m yours?”
he stepped closer. his fingers touched your chin gently — a complete contrast to the fierce look in his eyes.
“not yet. but you will be.”
the answer was so certain it sounded like prophecy.
you wanted to argue, but he was already too close. he kissed you with less fury than the last time — but with much more control. like he was setting the pace, testing boundaries. his mouth was a trap, and you stepped into it willingly.
when he pulled back, you were dizzy.
“why did you bring me here?”
taeyong lit a cigarette and leaned against the railing.
“because i need someone by my side. someone who doesn’t ask stupid questions. who understands that power costs blood. and that sometimes, what’s ‘right’ depends on who’s telling the story.”
“is that an invitation or a threat?”
“it’s an offer.”
he tossed a folder to the ground in front of you. “open it.”
you did.
documents. bank statements. photos. maps.
and in the middle of it all… your name.
on accounts, transfer papers, transactions with absurd amounts.
“what is this?”
“money. properties. access codes. all in your name. secretly.”
he stepped closer. “i take care of what belongs to me. and i like knowing where my money is. where you are.”
“this is insane.”
“yeah. and that’s why it works.”
you closed the folder with trembling hands.
“you made me your front?”
“i made you my shield. you won’t get involved. you’ll just be there. and in return…”
he leaned in, face inches from yours.
“in return, i’ll protect you from everything.”
──────────────────────
in the following days, everything changed.
you started receiving calls from unknown numbers offering services you never requested. a security guard began standing at the end of your street. at work, your boss called you in — wanted to know “who you knew,” since “powerful people” had called to “guarantee your comfort and career growth.”
you started receiving deliveries: expensive dresses, boxes of discreet jewelry, cards signed only with the letter “t.” and more disturbing: every time you went out with mina, someone took photos. the next day, those photos were on your phone.
taeyong wasn’t asking for you.
he was buying you.
you tried confronting him. sent messages he ignored. called. nothing.
until, in the silence of one early morning, he showed up. inside your apartment.
“the door was locked,” you said, startled.
“i have a key.”
“how?”
he laughed, like it was obvious.
“i gave you the folder, y/n. you really thought i wouldn’t have a copy?”
you were angry. but not enough to push him away when he touched your warm skin with cold fingers.
“you can’t just invade my life.”
“but i already did.”
he pressed you softly against the wall, exactly like in the club.
“and you let me.”
“this isn’t normal.”
“i never said it was.”
his voice dropped. “but it’s yours. if you want it.”
and in that moment, you knew: he wasn’t just lust.
he was possession. greed. avarice in flesh.
taeyong didn’t collect lovers. he collected secrets, people, and now… you.
──────────────────────
days later, you went with him to a house outside the city. an old mansion, surrounded by high gates and trees that blocked the view. inside, it was cold, silent, and spotless — as if no one lived there. but everything smelled like taeyong.
he showed you the rooms with disinterest, until he stopped at a study. locked with a key. inside, a dark marble desk, heavy drawers, old paintings, an entire wall of monitors connected to cameras.
cameras placed all over the city.
and among them… one with a direct view of your living room.
you froze.
“you spy on me?”
“i protect you.”
“this is sick.”
“this is strategy.”
he stared at you. “you don’t understand the world you’re entering. i need to see everything. control everything. because the day i let my guard down… i die.”
“and me? am i just another asset to you, taeyong?”
“no. you’re my weakness. and that’s why you have to be mine too.”
you had no answers. only a racing heart. part fear. part desire.
and when he kissed you again, there, in that cold room full of eyes, you kissed him back.
because it was already too late.
he closed the office door behind you.
silence thickened, cut only by the sound of keys turning in the lock. taeyong put the keyring in his pocket, but never took his eyes off you.
“come.”
the order came firm, low, with no room for hesitation.
you followed him upstairs, your body reacting to the rising tension. the hallway was dark, lit only by amber-toned lamps, and ended in a double black door with metallic details.
when he opened it, the room seemed to swallow you.
dark gray walls, heavy curtains, a king-size bed with black sheets. shelves lined with hardcover books. a red armchair in the corner. it was masculine, refined, dangerous.
it was him.
taeyong pulled you by the waist with trained precision. like he had imagined you there a thousand times. like he knew exactly how you would react.
“still think this is madness?”
“yes,” you whispered, already breathless. “but i don’t care anymore.”
the response made his lips curl into a dark smile.
without warning, he kissed you.
it was hungry.
there was no more gentleness. his mouth dominated yours with force, like he wanted to consume you whole. his fingers slid down your waist, pulling your shirt up, impatient. when you raised your arms, he took it off roughly, exposing your breasts to the room’s cold air
his eyes darkened.
“so beautiful. so mine.”
his hands went to your back, unhooking your bra with scary ease. he tossed it to the floor without a glance. when his fingers touched your nipples, you moaned softly, your skin burning under his touch.
he pushed you to the edge of the bed and laid you down gently. climbed over you with his firm body, knees spreading your legs.
“open for me.”
you obeyed without thinking.
and when his palm pressed between your thighs, over your pants, you moaned again. he chuckled, lips brushing your ear.
“are you wet, y/n? just knowing i control everything?”
“t-taeyong…”
he unbuttoned your pants, pulling them off quickly, never looking away. when you were left in just panties, he ran his fingers over the fabric, pressing the soaked center with torturous calm.
“you like being watched? knowing i see you even when you don’t notice?”
“this is sick.”
“but it makes you like this” — he slipped his fingers under your panties and sank two inside you at once — “wet. hot. tight.”
you arched, moaning loud. he kept moving with precision, eyes fixed on yours like he was reading every reaction.
“gonna cum just from my fingers, y/n?”
you tried to answer, but your voice failed. the pleasure rose too fast.
he noticed.
he pulled his fingers out abruptly, leaving you empty, trembling.
“not yet. i want more than that.”
taeyong got on his knees and slowly undressed. first the jacket. then the shirt, revealing his defined, tattooed chest, narrow waist.
finally, he undid his belt and pants. the bulge in his briefs made your body clench again, involuntarily.
when he took them off, his cock was fully hard.
“turn around.”
you obeyed, without question.
you felt him climb behind you, hands spreading your thighs, yanking your panties down. a sharp slap on your ass made you gasp, and another followed, leaving you even more exposed.
“you’re mine. my weakness. my obsession.” — he positioned his tip at your entrance, sliding it slowly, teasing — “my favorite possession.”
and then, he entered you.
deep.
without warning.
you screamed, clutching the sheets, and he groaned against your neck, fingers digging into your waist as he buried himself inside you.
“so tight for me… so perfect…”
the thrusts started intense. rhythmic. he held your hips firmly, fucking deep and steady, each thrust drawing another moan from you.
“you’re gonna remember you’re mine every time you sit on this bed. you’ll remember i was the first to fuck you here.”
“taeyong…”
“say you’re mine.”
“i am… i’m yours…”
he leaned down, chest pressing into your back, thrusting even deeper, one hand wrapped around your neck.
“again.”
“i’m yours!”
he went faster, the sound of skin against skin filling the room, mixed with your loud moans, his ragged breathing. you felt everything. the possession. the surrender. the fear. the overwhelming pleasure.
and when he reached down and rubbed your clit hard, your body gave in.
you came in seconds, screaming, your entire body trembling beneath him. taeyong didn’t stop until the last second — and when he came, it was with a rough groan in your ear, burying himself deep like he wanted to mark you from the inside.
he stayed there, panting, for a few moments, still inside you.
then, he pulled out slowly. and pulled you close in bed, covering you both with the dark sheet.
“are you afraid of me now?”
you were breathing hard, your body still pulsing from the orgasm, the aftershocks leaving your limbs weak. his voice was quieter now — but no less intense.
you hesitated.
“i don’t know.”
taeyong turned your face toward his with two fingers under your chin. his gaze was unreadable, but something flickered there — not softness, but something close to it.
“good. fear keeps people alive.”
you stayed quiet. your head on his chest. his hand in your hair.
“don’t try to run from me again, y/n.”
you closed your eyes.
“i won’t.”
you didn’t say it because you believed him.
you said it because you didn’t want to run.
and that was the scariest part.
𝐠𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐲
genre: fluff
wc: ~5400 (don´t get used)
pairing: husband!hyunjin x f!reader
summary: you are pregnant, but hyunjin is the one who got all the symptoms
not proofread!
──────────────────────
the smell of grilled chicken started to spread through the kitchen as i stirred the pan with one hand and cut the rest of the potatoes with the other. i put on a calm playlist in the background just to break the afternoon silence. it was a sunny sunday, the kind that would normally put hyunjin in a good mood, but he was acting strange… again
“hyune, lunch is almost ready!” i called without taking my eyes off the pan
what i heard in response was a dull sound coming from the living room, something between a groan of pain and a muffled “oh my god”
“hyunjin?”
“i can’t even look at chicken today i swear…” he replied in a whiny voice
i walked to the kitchen door and found him lying on the couch, hugging a pillow against his stomach, legs stretched out, eyes closed
“are you feeling sick?”
“nausea. again. seriously just the smell of the chicken flipped my stomach inside out”
“again?” i leaned against the doorframe, crossing my arms
“third time this week. i woke up with a headache, heartburn, nausea, and now this. y/n, something’s wrong with me”
“maybe you should see a doctor. it’s been like this for two weeks now”
hyunjin opened his eyes slowly and looked at me like he had just made a huge discovery
“what if…” he dramatically adjusted himself on the couch “what if i’m pregnant?”
i burst out laughing right away
“sure. you’re pregnant. i’ll go mark it on the calendar”
“mocking my pain doesn’t help you know?” he placed a hand on his stomach with a suffering expression “maybe it’s sympathy pregnancy. it happens to some dads. i read about it”
“hyunjin, you can’t get pregnant”
“but what if my body is so connected to yours that it decided to go through the pregnancy with you? like soulmates… but with cramps and heartburn”
i rolled my eyes with a smile tugging at the corner of my lips but part of me froze
wait
my hands automatically went to the waistband of my sweatpants
that crazy idea made me remember something i shouldn’t have forgotten
“what is it?” he asked, raising his eyebrows at me “you look pale all of a sudden”
“nothing… i mean… just trying to remember…”
i went to the fridge and pulled off the calendar stuck with a magnet. i started counting the days
1… 2… 3… 4 weeks
“what are you trying to remember?”
“my period…” i whispered more to myself
“WHAT?” he shot up “you’re late?”
i nodded slowly
“it’s been over thirty days”
hyunjin went quiet for a second, staring at me like he was witnessing a miracle
“you think…”
“i don’t know. but i’m going to the pharmacy right now”
“want me to go with you? want me to buy it? want me to go alone and you stay here resting just in case you’re already pregnant and need to take it easy?”
“hyune, it’s just a test”
“but it’s the test”
i took a deep breath, grabbed my bag and left, feeling my heart beat differently
maybe it was just a false alarm
maybe not
20 minutes later, the bathroom felt quieter than usual
we were sitting on the floor, side by side, hyunjin’s hands tangled with mine
the pregnancy test sat on the sink, face down
time seemed to stop
“if it’s positive…” he began in a soft voice “…i promise i’ll learn to change diapers and never say i’d sell my soul for ice cream at 3 a.m. again”
“you never said that”
“but i thought it”
i laughed nervously
“and if it’s negative?”
“we try again”
“hyunjin!”
“what? it’s true! i’ve already grown attached to the imaginary baby”
i sighed and finally turned over the test
two lines
we went silent for two seconds
then hyunjin’s eyes widened and he covered his mouth, looking between the test and my face
“two lines. two lines. y/n…”
“i’m pregnant”
he started laughing and crying at the same time, completely caught between sobs and giggles
“you’re pregnant… i’m pregnant too! i knew it! i always knew. my body screamed it with every wave of nausea!”
he pulled me into a tight hug, the two of us sitting on the cold bathroom floor, the whole world suddenly too small for that moment
“i love you” he whispered in my ear “and i love this baby. even if it’s the size of a chia seed for now”
“i can’t believe we’re having a baby” i said wiping the tears off my face
he reached out and touched my belly, still flat
“you’re gonna be the perfect mom. and if i keep having symptoms, i swear i won’t complain. i’ll live this pregnancy with you. every single minute”
“ and you’re gonna be the most wonderful dad”
we stayed there a while longer, still a little shocked, but smiling
hyunjin rested his head on my shoulder and let out a dramatic sigh
“now everything makes sense. i felt it. i was pregnant with empathy. literally pregnant with love”
──────────────────────
the office was all white, with a light beige armchair and a little table with old magazines. but what really filled the space was the tense silence between the two of us. hyunjin was sitting next to me, one hand holding mine and the other… clutching a little pack of tissues.
“baby, why the tissues?” i asked, unable to hold back a laugh.
“i’m just getting ready. i know i’m going to cry. i saw those videos on tiktok, love, some dads hear the baby’s heartbeat and just lose it. i’m more sensitive than all of them put together"
he squeezed my hand tighter and looked at me with his eyes already glistening.
“i’m nervous"
“me too"
the doctor entered the room with a gentle smile and a clipboard in hand.
“hello, mr. and mrs. hwang, right?”
“yes, that's us”
“we’ll start with the ultrasound. is that okay?”
i nodded.
i lay down on the table while hyunjin stood next to me, holding onto my wrist like he was afraid i’d run away.
the doctor prepped the ultrasound machine, spread the cold gel on my belly, and slid the transducer over it.
hyunjin was already sniffling before we even saw anything.
“there.” the doctor pointed. “see that little flickering dot?”
“i do…” i replied, barely able to speak.
“that’s the heartbeat. we estimate about seven weeks. everything looks good with the baby.”
hyunjin let out a sound that was half cry, half laugh.
“it’s the most beautiful little bean i’ve ever seen…”
he dropped to his knees beside me, rested his head against the exam table, and sobbed with his face buried in my fingers.
“babe, it has a heart. a tiny little heart beating. like… for real.”
“hyunjin, get up, oh my god”
“i can’t. my knees gave out.”
the doctor had to stifle a laugh, and i stayed there, teary-eyed, holding the hand of the most dramatically loving man in the world.
after the exam ended, he helped me sit up with a gentleness that would make any nurse proud. he wrapped me in my little jacket, grabbed my bag, and led me to the car like i was about to give birth on the sidewalk.
at home, by late afternoon, we were lying on the bed, his head resting against my still-flat belly.
“you know, if you start kicking hard, please be gentle with daddy. he’s sensitive”
“hyunjin…”
“i just want them to hear my voice from now on”
i was running my fingers through his hair, giggling softly.
“are you feeling anything today?”
“today? headache, craving for mango with chili, nausea when i smelled our neighbor’s cologne… and i had a nightmare that the baby was born talking.”
“you seem more pregnant than i do.”
“i know.” he sighed. “but i’m happy. i never thought it was possible to love someone i haven’t even seen. but i do. i’m in love. with you… and our little bean.”
in the middle of the night, i woke up to a soft sound. i found hyunjin sitting on the floor of the bedroom, holding a little box.
“hyune? are you okay?”
“i’m writing a journal for the baby.”
“now? at three in the morning?”
“inspiration hit. i wrote: ‘dear baby, today was the day we heard your heart. the most beautiful sound in the world. your mom is a heroine and i… i’m an emotional potato, but i’ll try to be the best dad in the world. love you. signed: your daddy'”
“it's beautiful husband but come back to bed"
he smiled and climbed into bed, curling up behind me with his hands on my belly.
“good night wife, and good night little one"
i woke up with thin rays of sunlight slipping through the gap in the curtain. it was a warm, gentle light, the kind that feels like it’s hugging you in a calm way. i stretched carefully, feeling the weight of my belly becoming more present with each passing day.
next to me, hyunjin was still asleep. his messy hair had fallen over his eyes, and one of his hands, as always, rested on top of my belly — like he was afraid of losing contact with the baby during the night.
i turned slowly so i wouldn’t wake him, but of course he felt the movement.
“hmm…” he mumbled, voice raspy “already waking up, love?”
“yes” i smiled “someone in here is kicking like they’re in dance rehearsal.”
his eyes opened a little more, and a smile spread across his face even though his voice was still sleepy. he leaned in toward my belly and gently rested his face there.
“you’re growing so well, you know that? and your mom is even more beautiful with you in there.”
“are you asking for breakfast or just flirting with me?”
he gave a silly little smile, but before he could answer, his body stiffened. he sat up quickly, holding his stomach and frowning.
“ugh… oh no. oh no.”
“what is it?” i sat up too, worried.
“i… i think i’m gonna throw up. babe, i feel really sick.”
“again, hyune?”
he ran to the bathroom with one hand over his mouth. i sat there on the bed, listening to him gag and trying to understand how he had more pregnancy symptoms than i did.
a few minutes later, he came back looking pale and teary-eyed.
“false alarm, but the smell of our soap almost made me really throw up” he said, collapsing back onto the bed with a dramatic groan “that lavender one. i’ll never be able to use it again”
“you’re more pregnant than i am”
“and am i being judged for that?” he shot back, closing his eyes.
“no, i just find it funny that even air conditioning makes you nauseous”
“you don’t get it. i’m so connected to you two that i feel it. i really do. seriously. like… my body wants the full experience”
i sighed, laughing, and started running my fingers through his hair.
“let me remind you that i’m still the only person with an actual child growing inside of them, okay?”
he lifted his head slowly.
“for now…”
“hyunjin, don’t start”
he laughed, finally seeming better.
“but hey, this afternoon we need to go out and buy the rest of the baby stuff. remember?”
he sat up straighter in bed.
“today? yeah, of course. but only if i don’t faint from the store smell”
“you’re unbearable and perfect at the same time”
“the perfect recipe for an emotional dad”
──────────────────────
the mall was busy, but the baby store felt like a quiet bubble of cuteness. everything in pastel colors, soft fabrics, piles of teddy bears… and hyunjin, like an overgrown kid, trying to hide the sparkle in his eyes.
“babe… look at this sock. it has little ears. look at this” he practically whispered, holding up a tiny pair of pink socks.
“too cute. but focus, love, we came to get the stroller and the crib set”
but he had already gotten distracted again, this time in front of a little lion onesie.
“our baby’s gonna look like a stuffed animal in this.”
“hyunjin.”
he sighed, resigned, but still tossed the onesie into the cart.
we headed to the stroller section and he froze in front of an ultra-high-tech model that almost looked like a transformer.
“this one has suspension, a camera, and plays lullabies.”
“is it a stroller or a car?”
“what if our baby is a very picky baby? they’re gonna want comfort.”
“our baby doesn’t even know how to open their eyes yet.”
he laughed, but grabbed the stroller anyway. the problem came when it was time to fit it into the car trunk.
“hyunjin… you didn’t check if this would fit first?”
“did you check if your patience could handle dating a guy with empathy nausea?”
“touché.”
in the end, we came back with the stroller in the back seat, a bag full of tiny clothes, and a hyunjin completely in love with every inch of the experience.
night fell with the cool breeze coming through the living room window. hyunjin was already in a baggy sweatshirt, hair tied in a loose bun, and a nearly childlike excitement in his eyes. the shopping bags were scattered on the floor, and he was crouching carefully — not because he was in pain, but because he said he was “syncing with y/n's difficulty to bend down.” dramatic? absolutely. but my favorite kind of dramatic.
“ready to organize the baby stuff?” he asked, opening the first bag with almost ceremonial care.
“ready. i’m just wondering if you’re gonna cry again today.”
“y/n” he looked at me seriously “today we’re building the crib. if that’s not a reason to cry, i don’t know what is.”
i didn’t even have time to answer. he pulled out one of those little bunny security blankets and let out a sigh so dramatic it was like he had just found a lost childhood relic.
“look at this, love… the baby’s gonna hold this while they sleep. it’s gonna have their little scent.”
“or vomit, if they take after you and get nauseous from literally everything.”
he made a face but couldn’t hold back a laugh.
while he started assembling the crib with pieces scattered around the room, i sat on the pouf with a bottle of water and began sorting the clothes to wash the next day. every now and then he’d let out an “ow!” or a “hyunjin, focus!” to himself, like he was on some kind of life mission.
when he finished, the crib was facing our side of the bed. he stood there in silence for a while, eyes shining.
“we’re gonna sleep here and… right next to us will be our baby. here. with us…”
he stopped talking. literally. just opened his arms like he couldn’t put the feeling into words. and then, he ran to the closet and came back with… a doll.
“hyunjin…”
“let me play, just to see what it’ll be like.”
he carefully laid the doll in the crib and stood beside it, gently rocking the mattress with his hand.
“shhh… daddy’s here…” he whispered, acting it out.
“you know this is creepy, right?”
“it’s practice! look how well he’s sleeping.”
“hyunjin, the doll doesn’t even blink.”
“that means it’s in a deep sleep then.”
i was already crying from laughing.
after a few minutes, he sat on the floor, leaning back against the wall, watching the crib with slightly glassy eyes. i reached out my hand to him.
“come here, emotional dad.”
he crawled over and lay down with his head in my lap. i ran my fingers through his hair while i felt the baby move inside me.
“baby’s kicking.”
he stared at my belly, mesmerized.
“it feels like i have it inside me too, you know?”
“i know. you’re the only man who could have such an intense empathetic pregnancy.”
“do you think it’s possible to have cravings too? because i’m seriously craving those sugar donuts.”
“hyunjin, you ate seven yesterday.”
“the baby wants it too, y/n. the baby used me as a messenger.”
i rolled my eyes, laughing, but i was already heading to the kitchen. the truth was, i couldn’t resist him, especially when he looked at me like that, like i was the most beautiful thing in the world with this belly growing more every week.
that night, we laid together and stayed quiet for a long time, just feeling each other’s presence, and our baby’s. hyunjin with his hand on my belly, eyes closed, and that silly little smile still on his face.
“do you think he’ll have my eyes?” he whispered, already half asleep.
“if he does, he’s gonna melt the world just like his dad did.”
and that’s how we fell asleep. him, me… and our little kicker.
──────────────────────
the garden looked like it had come straight out of a dream. baby blue and soft pink balloons covered every corner, in arches above the table, scattered between white chairs, and tied to the ground with ribbons that danced in the wind. hanging from a tree were photos of us since the beginning of the pregnancy, hyunjin kissing my belly, the first ultrasound, me laughing with my hand on my stomach while he pretended to feel sick beside me. it was impossible to look around and not smile.
but hyunjin… he was a walking ball of nerves.
“do you want to sit down? want some water?” i asked for the third time, watching him rub the back of his neck for what felt like the thousandth time in five minutes.
“i don’t even know what i want, babe.” he replied with a nervous laugh. “maybe pass out? can i come back after the reveal?”
“you’re pale!”
“i’m about to find out if i’m going to be the dad of a little girl who’ll shatter my heart with two glances or of a mini-hyunjin who’s gonna drive me crazy climbing on everything. pale is an understatement.”
i slowly stood up from the chair and walked over to him. i placed my hand on his cheek.
“you’re already the dad of anyone’s dreams. whoever this baby is, they’re the luckiest in the world.”
he held my hand against his face and closed his eyes.
“do you think she… or he… can already feel all of this?”
“absolutely. this baby’s going to grow up surrounded by so much love it won’t even fit.”
hyunjin opened his eyes, a glimmer of emotion threatening to spill. then he looked at my belly and bent down slightly, speaking softly as if the world around us had disappeared:
“hey, baby… it’s daddy here. today’s our big day, okay? we’re going to find out who you are. but no matter what… i already love you so much it doesn’t even fit inside me.”
“babe…” i said, feeling my eyes fill too.
he stood up, squeezed my hand, and took a deep breath.
“is it time?”
i nodded. people around us were already calling, guests getting their phones ready. in the center, the big black balloon swayed gently in the wind, with a small golden tag that read in cursive: “girl or boy?”
we stood under the balloon. hyunjin looked at me.
“last chance to run.”
“you run slower than i do pregnant. there’s no escape.”
he laughed.
“i love you.”
“i love you too, hyunjin.”
we grabbed the stick together. one, two… three.
POUF!
the balloon burst with a pop, and for a second, time froze. a shower of pink confetti flew into the sky and started falling around us like flower petals.
everything went quiet. and then…
“is… is it a girl?” he asked, as if he couldn’t believe what he was seeing. “pink… it’s pink, right? oh my god, it’s a girl!”
he brought his hands to his head, then let the tears fall, smiling like it was the most beautiful thing in the world.
“it’s a girl… she’s my little girl…” his voice broke completely. he dropped to his knees in the grass. “i’m… i’m doomed.”
i knelt beside him. held him tightly. we were both laughing and crying at the same time as the guests cheered around us.
“i knew it… i knew it was you.” he whispered to my belly, overwhelmed. “i felt everything, every wave of nausea, every fear, every joy. it was you telling me you were here all along.”
“she already knows she has the silliest dad in the universe.” i said, my hand in his hair.
“silly and totally smitten.” he chuckled, eyes still glistening. then he brought his face close to my belly. “you already have my heart, princess. and i promise i’ll protect you forever.”
in that moment, between confetti, promises, and tears, there was no doubt: our daughter was already loved more than words could ever explain.
──────────────────────
“babe, have you seen the pouch with my breast pads?” i asked, rummaging through the dresser with one hand and holding the checklist with the other.
hyunjin appeared at the door, flushed and breathless, holding two toothbrushes, one of my socks, and the makeup case.
“i found this. is this useful? this is useful, right?” he sounded out of breath just from running up and down the room.
“hyun, that’s the eyeliner case. and this is the baby’s sock.”
he stepped closer, eyes wide.
“the baby’s sock?! how did i put the baby’s sock in your pouch?? oh god, i’m going to faint.”
“breathe. you’re not the one giving birth, i am.”
“you think?! because i’m starting to doubt that!” he put a hand on his belly, frowning. “ow… ow. ow. oh my god…”
“hyunjin…”
“it’s like a cramp, babe. it’s coming in waves. it’s coming in waves”
“you’ve got gas”
“i’ve got contractions”
“you’ve got drama”
he placed his hands on his hips and started pacing in circles.
“i think the baby’s going to be born through me. my body absorbed the suffering. i’m the new birth canal. take me to the hospital”
“hyun, grab my blue button-up shirt and stop with the theatrics”
he left the room talking to himself, still clutching his belly and moaning like he was about to have his water break. i laughed to myself, organizing the last things in the hospital bag, when i felt… a pop.
pluc.
and then… the warmth.
“hyunjin…” i called out, frozen in place.
he came running back with the blue shirt, still acting out his contractions.
“what it is babe?”
“my water just broke”
he froze.
“YOUR WHAT?”
“my water broke. the baby’s coming”
panic. silence. eyes locked.
hyunjin let out a high-pitched squeal, stumbled, and nearly fell on his butt.
“oh my god it’s real? oh my god it’s today?!”
“yes! and you need to stop pretending you’re in pain and help me up!”
he rushed over, tripping over his own feet, hands on his head.
“okay, okay! bag! keys! car! you! me! ah no, i’m feeling another contraction!”
“hyunjin!”
“sorry! i’m coming! everything’s gonna be okay! don’t go into labor yet, let me find my wallet!”
“i’m the one giving birth!”
“i know, love, but i’m just as pregnant as you are in spirit!!”
amid the chaos, we finally left the house. hyunjin driving like a rocket, whispering prayers, cursing at red lights, and tearing up every time i took a deep breath.
“if she’s born with this sense of timing, she’s definitely gonna be a drama queen like her dad.” i said, between contractions.
“she inherited the talent and comedic timing, yes. but i hope she gets her mom’s common sense. ow, ow… phantom pain again!”
“you’ll give birth through your mouth if you keep saying that.”
we arrived at the hospital with hyunjin practically skidding into the emergency parking spot. he jumped out of the car, shouting at the nurses:
“my wife is in labor! and so am i!”
“he’s not in labor!” i yelled from the car door. “but i am, and he’s about to pass out!”
it was the most beautiful chaos of our lives. the beginning of the greatest love of all.
──────────────────────
the room was softly lit. the nurse adjusted the equipment, the doctor spoke in a calm voice, but everything sounded muffled. the loudest sound was hyunjin’s heavy breathing and the rhythmic echo of contractions, each one stronger than the last.
he was squeezing my hand so tightly I couldn’t even tell who was comforting who anymore.
“you’re doing so good, baby. so, so good. i’m right here, okay? i’m not going anywhere. not even if i faint. if i faint, just pick me up, but i’m staying.” he spoke fast, his voice trembling, eyes glassy.
“you’ve said that like ten times already, hyune” I murmured, trying to smile between the pain.
“i have to keep reminding you because… you’re incredible. i don’t even know how you’re doing this. and i wish i could take all this pain and carry it for you…”
“you’ve already felt everything for me so far.” I replied, my gaze soft.
he let out a nervous laugh, wiping sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand. he was pale, hair stuck to his skin from the anxiety. he turned to the doctor:
“she’s almost there, right? you can see the head? the ears? everything’s coming out already?!”
the doctor answered with a patient smile:
“almost there, dad. we just need a little more strength, mama. you can do this.”
I nodded, my eyes filling with tears. the pain was intense, but love overflowed. I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and pushed with everything I had left.
“yes! that’s it, baby! oh my god! you’re doing it! she’s coming, you’re bringing her to us!” Hyunjin shouted, voice cracking with emotion, like he was witnessing a miracle.
one more contraction. one more push. and then… the sound.
the first cry. small. fragile. loud.
my eyes opened instantly. and the world stopped.
“did she… is she here?” I asked, breathless.
the doctor held that tiny little being, wrapped in a white and pink cloth, eyes shut and mouth slightly open.
“she’s a beautiful little girl.” she said with a smile. “congratulations, mama. congratulations, papa.”
hyunjin broke down.
tears streamed freely down his face. He fell to his knees beside the bed, resting his head on my legs as he sobbed.
“she’s here… she’s really here… she’s real…” he repeated, broken. “you did this. you brought her to us.”
the nurse called him, and he stood up on shaky legs, clumsily wiping his face, and took the first steps toward our daughter.
“hi…” he whispered, approaching gently. “i’m your dad. you have no idea how long we’ve waited for you.”
he held the little bundle in his arms like she was made of porcelain and brought her back to me.
“look at her, baby… she’s perfect. she has your lips.”
“and your nose.” I smiled, crying too.
hyunjin sat beside me, arms wrapped around both of us, the three of us fitting together like a single heartbeat.
“we did it.” he murmured, kissing my forehead. “she’s here.”
we stayed like that, in silence, while the world outside kept spinning. Inside that room, there was only peace. only love.
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the apartment door closed with a soft click. hyunjin pushed it shut with his foot as he helped me inside. the baby was sleeping curled up in my arms, wrapped in a white blanket with tiny pink bows.
the silence in the air felt strange. After months of waiting, running, pain, tears, and dreams… now she was here. Home.
“i think she likes it here.” I whispered, feeling my heart on the verge of bursting.
hyunjin kicked off his shoes in the hallway like any sound might wake her. Then he ran to the couch and threw all the pillows around.
“wait, wait, sit here, babe. rest your arm on this side. yeah, slowly…” he instructed every move like I was made of glass. “want water? fruit? a pillow for your back? your feet? a massage? the moon? i’ll bring it.”
I let out a soft laugh.
“i want you to sit down next to me and stop spinning around the house like a top.”
he froze, laughed nervously, and collapsed onto the couch beside me.
“sorry. i’m kinda freaking out. it’s just… damn, she’s here. like… really here.”
I looked at our daughter. she was sleeping with her lips slightly parted and her tiny hands balled up like she was dreaming of her own birth.
“do you think she’ll hate the crib?” I asked, stroking the edge of the blanket.
“if she does, she sleeps with us. we’ll manage.” he replied, resting his head against mine. “or i’ll stay up all night with her in my arms. no big deal.”
“of course it is. you’ll fall asleep standing up.”
“not true. i’m a dad now, i’ve reached monk-level self-control.”
“hyunjin, you cried yesterday because she sneezed.”
“and it was the cutest sneeze in the entire world. don’t even deny it.”
i let out a muffled laugh, but quickly went quiet when the baby stirred. Hyunjin held his breath. she let out a tiny sigh… and fell back asleep.
he melted into the couch, relieved.
“okay. we survived her first sigh.”
we sat there for a while, admiring that tiny little face like it was the eighth wonder of the world. after a moment, he whispered:
“can I hold her for a bit?”
I nodded. He gently took her into his arms like he was holding a falling star.
“hi, my love…” he whispered. “it’s your dad. we made it. this is your home now.”
my eyes welled up again.
“you’re gonna spoil her.”
"with love? absolutely.” he said with a goofy smile, kissing her forehead.
suddenly, she opened her mouth and made a soft sound… and then the dreaded little cry began.
hyunjin went pale.
“she’s hungry? diaper? cold? hot? help me!”
I carefully took the baby back and opened her onesie.
“it’s okay. just a dirty diaper. want to change her?”
he jumped to his feet, excited:
“yes! of course I do! I practiced with the training doll! I’m a total profe—”
“she pooped all the way up to her neck.”
he froze.
“okay. copy that. plan b: i’ll grab the wipes and offer emotional support.”
while he fumbled with wipes, a burp cloth, the portable changing mat and a roll of paper towels, I couldn’t stop smiling. even with the dark circles under my eyes and exhaustion dragging me down… my whole world was right there, in two sets of eyes: my daughter’s, and my husband, who was now looking at me with the purest expression of love… and poop on his finger.
“are you laughing at me?” he asked, horrified.
“hyun, the diaper’s on backwards.”
“it’s conceptual.”
“it’s a disaster.”
later that night, once she finally fell asleep in the crib for the very first time, we collapsed into bed, hand in hand.
“i’m scared I won’t be able to handle this.” he confessed quietly, staring at the ceiling.
I turned to face him.
“you already are. every diaper disaster, every kiss on the forehead, every dumb joke that made me laugh these past nine months… you’re the best dad she could ever have.”
he turned his face to look at me, eyes full again.
“and you’re the best mom in the universe. thank you for giving me both of you.”
we kissed slowly, feeling our hearts beat in sync.
and there, on the first night of our new life, we realized:
the chaos had begun…
but we had never been this happy