[wildparsnip]

but i’m a cweep.. i’m a weiwdo.. what the heww am i doowing hewe. i don’t bewong hewe 

[konoko]

[85-rend]

this was missing the incredibly important next picture where she got mad at the camera like its their fault she bit the soap

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

5 year anniversary of the miette post \o/

[anais-ninja-bitch]

995 years left on mother's sentence

[ntrlily]

they should invent a 9-5 where its only 3 hours instead of 8

[sonandheirofnothinginparticular]

[william-snekspeare]

This is so real

[catcrumb]

[max-oats]

hey folks,,,,,... glad 2 b here on tubblr . here's a little self-portrait of me,, a human male

[max-oats]

on my way to work at the job factory :) lets get this bread !, and by bre,d i mean human money dollars haha. dont even like bred

[max-oats]

feeding the ducks

(disclaimer: i do Not live in thi,s pond. i live in a home House.)

[max-oats]

ah . allow me to introduce my two lovely childen . Child and Baby . :) they are both just regular Men just like their old man(me)

[depsidase]

[reallyndacarter]

A PSA

[guidancerune]

[tea-and-secrets]

My friend got pregnant at 17. Deeply religious family (she would be kivked out if they found out), one night stand, she just could NOT have the baby. Thing is we live in a country where abortion is illegal. Our only option was to illegally buy some pills online and hope they worked and we didnt go to jail

But these are hecking expensive and we needed to rush

So i set up a twitter/fb/insta/furaffinity/etc account and advertised my furry art EVERYWHERE. Im not that good but i said id draw basically anything no matter how weird (not cub art or anything illegal). I got a lot of weird coms (vore, scat, inflation and some i dont even understand) and for two weeks i did nothing but draw weird shit all day. My hand hurt so bad, but i got the money.

We spent a week afraid we'd been scammed and afraid we'd get caught, then a weekend afraid my friend might die once we did the procedure in my house. But it worked

I never told her how i got the money and i never will. Id rather die than tell her i funded her illegal abortion by drawing the wolf from robin hood swallowing robin through his belly button. Im pretty sure she thinks i was a prostitute for those two weeks and id rather her think that

To this day i gift her condoms on her bd as a joke bc im never doing that again

.

[mr-deep-downer]

[unashamedly-enthusiastic]

You just don't get content like this anywhere else

[vanquishedvaliant]

ngl deep respect to this person for hauling ass and getting shit done for their friend like laugh all you want but this person was RIDE OR DIE

[crabanarchy]

you can't use a portal gun to have sex with your own butt because every time you thrust your butt would get further away. You'd be like tantalus in the garden

[memorycycle]

reason for a snout is so you can stick your sniffer in areas, in order to get an accurate sniff. this was necessary back when god still hadnt finished the big jigsaw puzzle yet and there were unfilled crevices everywhere. end of chapter 4.

chapter 5: the smoothening of reality and decline of snouted beasts

[dreg-heap]

The moral of The Lottery is that they threw rocks at her

[dreg-heap]

[cbc-bb-deactivated20250802]

would it krill you to have a little shrimpathy?

[beaft]

my cat hates taking his pills. the only way we can get him to eat them is to turn it into an elaborate pantomime - we take the packet out of the cupboard slowly and hold it up, saying “oh!! what’s this? what’s this? a TREAT? a TREAT for louis????” while making surprised faces. we offer him a pill… then, before he has a chance to sniff it, we wag our fingers at him and replace it in the packet so it becomes a Tantalising Forbidden Mystery. we continue doing this until he’s so confused and excited that he will eat the pill as fast as possible, just so he can find out what it is before we can take it away from him again. as soon as he’s eaten it he looks utterly disappointed and betrayed, like a child who just ate a delicious sweet only to find it was a chocolate-coated brussels sprout. it never gets old

[autumngracy]

Op this is the funniest thing I’ve ever read

[fucktheflagandfuckyou]

op how could you just hide this from me in the tag this makes this objectively 10000000% funnier

[stalling]

50 First Doses

[skyline-sunset-in-my-veins]

You trick Louis? You trick Louis like a common fool? Oh jail, jail for owners ONE MILLION YE-oh what’s this? A treat?