I work in education and how that parent in the first post helped their child calm down is exactly what we do when I work in preK through 1st grade classrooms.
I also do this with my own children and it âs incredibly helpful. Small children are able to tell you whatâs wrong and tell you how they feel if theyâre given the tools to do so.
Common mistakes parents make:
-Assuming this will work right away. It wonât. It takes time for kids to get used to this. Parents/families need to use this frequently, consistently, and using language children can understand.
-By not staying calm themselves. This will not work if you let your own emotions/frustrations get in the way. When this happens frustrated parents want the kids to âhurry up and tell them whatâs wrongâ. Kids can tell youâre upset/frustrated/impatient. This can make things worse. You as a parent/caregiver need to remain calm as well.
-Use language that the child doesnât understand (as Enog mentioned above). Use language that your child CAN understand. A big thing you need to do even when your child isnât upset is to identify feelings. Do this all the time. When a child canât identify emotions, they have a hard time dealing with them. Use accessible language and model identifying as well as healthy ways to deal with various emotions.
-Failing to remove the child from a stressful situation. This is a VERY COMMON mistake parents and caregivers make. Young children in particular have a hard time focusing/calming down when overwhelmed. Some parents/caregivers expect the child to calm down while overwhelmed get frustrated with the child when this method doesnât work. Be sure to remove your child from the stressful situation or stimulus before asking them to tell you what is wrong.
Many people wonât get it right the first time. Recognizing the frequent mistakes above will help parents/caregivers from making these errors.
areudirty
blakekathryn
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