throwaway

[angrychicagoan24]

i’m gonna be real the people who complain about transandrophobia and transmisandry and stuff not being good terms because they imply this or that are just like the people who would say homophobia is a bad term because they’re not afraid of gay people

[disgusting-yucky-steve]

i feel so fucking numb rn. my friend was venting about dysphoria and i, thinking the floor was open to it, mentioned a thing with dysphoria that i experienced the other day (having an intrusive thought about taking a knife to my breasts). and her response was that they didn't want to hear it esp since they wanted to keep theirs. like girl i am not asking you to take off your own breasts bc i am upset by mine. i'm just sharing the fact that we have an experience of feeling wrong in our own bodies.

[gender-incinerator]

I fear many of us are forgetting that trans men belong to Men (the gender) but not Men (the sociopolitical class) and I think thats an important distinction

[spikyabyss]

I thought the consensus was gender is social construct. can you elaborate on what do you mean by gender as distinct from it's sociopolitical meaning?

[frozen-puddle-stomper]

sex and gender operate on a variety of levels.

medical, legal, beaurocratic, interpersonal, domestic, sexual, romantic, experiential, spiritual

it's always easier in a strictly hierarchical world to downgrade your spot in the hierarchy than it is to climb up

born males can easily disbenefit themselves by taking any steps towards feminisation. born females taking steps to masculinisation also usually disbenefit themselves except in certain, contextual scenarios.

so trans women are women = when a born male decides to live as a woman, she casts herself off that throne and down into the pit with the rest of us very easily. i think of course there are complicating factors, but for the most part. loving as a woman, legally being a woman, opens her up to domestic, interpersonal, and structural abuse on the basis of being a woman. whereas for the trans man, the negative effects of being born a female are much harder to elide. legal transition without surgical transition opens up one to situations like being forced into male prisons, shelters, and other spaces while having a vagina and possibly even breasts, which opens one up to higher rates of rape and assault. medicial transition often makes the trans man a domestic outcast from his family of origin or from his cis partner, if applicable, and in the case of lesbians, from his chosen family.

basically, if youre born rich, you can experience the wonders of being poor by just giving away all your money and living on the street. if youre born poor, you cant just identify as being rich.

but trans men can be truly men in their spirit, in the way they love, the domestic roles they take on, and so forth, and might genuinely interact with people as men and get coded as men in social settings. but when it comes to medical issues for his female body, legal issues that affect his reproduction and other rights, and the trauma of having been a woman in a misogynistic world, those are inescapable.

[fvckw4d]

Its not that trfism is an accident but it's really funny how often they will describe "tme" privilege and it is clearly pericis privilege. "When I go into the trans community there is afab-only groups and housing and programs everywhere" you are describing things for pericis women. When you say "afab-only housing", you are describing a Woman's Shelter For Pericis Woman. They are notorious for kicking out "afab" trans and intersex people as well. Most of the these groups and programs are. Because they are for pericis women.

[frozen-puddle-stomper]

+percis women do not have privilege on the basis of gender/sex either, i dont think theres a need to concede that point: the reason womens shelters exist is partly because a.) domestic violence victims are, numerically, by and large pericis women and b.) they cannot go to a mixed-sex shelted because they will be raped and re-vicitimized there. it is not a "privilege" to be female, even if you also identify as a woman, and there is not circumstance under which we should cede that ground to people who hate people who were born female or assigned/assumed female at birth.

[molfread]

if you think saying "trans men have gynecological body parts and are thus affected by misogyny" is equal to saying "all trans men are actually women" then sweetheart you might be a bioessentialist

[frozen-puddle-stomper]

its so fucking maddening, and their hypocrisy is always laid bare when you ask them if afab people can be TMA or identify as trans women. its apparently never bioessentialist to say only people born with penises/amab can be trans women, but for some reason it is bioessentialist to say that everyone born with vaginas needs access to gynecological care.

notice how it's always their ego which is the deciding factor, not our actual needs or agency.