It's Worm Season, Sweaty

Martin Luthot // he/him // has been dead for 471 frumpy, thotty years

[christor5]

The most pious monk of the 2000s was reported to get two more ribs inserted to make double sure he couldn't such his own dick

[yu-gi-oh-slavia]

they always talk about penis envy but what about the other six penis sins

[cipheramnesia]

I just can't go a day without seeing posts from the catholic penis side of Tumblr.

[adamndisgrace]

Penis divorce

[cipheramnesia]

I just can't go a day without seeing posts from the church of england penis side of Tumblr.

[frumpy-thot]

beautiful poem :)

[wanna-b-poet31]

It’s happened! The first Blaze post has haunted my dash, and it’s the fucking 95 theses. 

When I say hellsite (affectionate) this wasn’t the context I was thinking

[cardassiangoodreads]

This is the greatest website in the history of the world and I am never leaving

[mycroftrh]

catholic guilt vs protestant belief in your own inherent superiority, fight

[mycroftrh]

wait no I just remembered a few hundred years of history I take this post back

[bananahomo]

[anarchocunt]

[nonetoon]

So far the only sponsored posts I’ve seen on my dash is the “become Catholic now” one and one that is just a bunch of gifs of a ship for a tv show I don’t even recognize where are you guys getting the fun ones

[nonetoon]

Why is any of this happening

[orpheusilver]

hyperfixating on this is not enough i need to eat it

[heartshop]

Christians with jesus christ

[aaronburrssexdungeon]

i searched martin luther in the gifs section and this is the only result and i’m losing my mind

[baltowolfquest]

catholic emperors would name themselves "pope innocent" "pope clement" "pope never did anything wrong" "pope tiny little baby" "pope good guy" and then commit atrocities

[aurpiment]

#pope just a little guy it’s also my birthday i’m a little birthday boy. the third (via lakevida)

[pollyjean]

catholic (derogatory)

[hymnsofheresy]

protestant (derogatory)

[normal-horoscopes]

Did you know that the Vatican says you spend less time in purgatory if you follow the Pope on Twitter

PAYING MY INDULGENCES IN CLOUT

[c0rpseductor]

I AM SO SICK OF GETTING EMAILS FROM FUCKING CHRISTIANBOOK.COM!!!!! you buy a playmobil figure of martin luther ONE TIME and they’re all over your dick for years telling you about their bible specials. it’s over! i don’t have feelings for you christianbook.com i just wanted a single night of pleasure! it was a one night stand with protestantism!! 

[hotvampireadjacent]

Why did you buy a play mobile Martin Luther

[c0rpseductor]

i thought he was funny your honor

[parakeet]

[queen-mayhem]

protestants: god is not an absent father! talk to god like a friend! god is always with you! bring your problems to god, no matter how small! it’s not at all weird to call god “daddy!”

catholics: god is far too important to give a fuck about your lost keys or your algebra exam. please address your petty concerns to one of god’s ten thousand holy secretaries. if it’s really important, consider asking his mom.

[arsondotpng]

catholics can’t get in touch with god because he’s always on the phone with a protestant

[eternalgirlscout]

i will take a hammer and fix the canon

[eternalgirlscout]

[lifeattomsdiner]

[st-just]

[historyeet]

protestant reformation check 🤪