the most basic of binches

personal tumblr that's been through hell and back and still kicking i gave up on tagging properly years ago, have fun

[luntfontanne]

haven't watched this yet but damn this screencap is really gonna get some mileage on here huh

[intactics]

"rickrolling is mean" rickrolling is the gentle, kind, prosocial descendant of what we used to do on the internet, which was putting a redirect to goatse in every possible misspelling of a url

[basuralindo]

So I just simultaneously did, and possibly didn't lose my job today :)

Very much did in the sense that I literally do not know where my job is at the moment. But, for the time being I haven't been let go because nobody else including the store owner knows where it is either.

So, I don't wanna risk doxxing myself by posting pictures but goddamn am I tempted because this is not a believable event. This is a cartoon problem. For looneytoons.

But yeah, so, I work(ed?) at a kiosk selling boba tea, right? Freestanding kiosk in the mall with full water and electrical hookups and multiple fridges and sinks and a mini kitchen and the works. Fully functional tea shop. Very important to note that it was there last night, The work chat was discussing another issue last night at closing time. I'll get back to this.

It's been showing signs of being on the way out with how business is being handled lately and I've been considering other options, which is probably why I'm not as torn up about this as I should be, but maybe it just hasn't set in yet, but that's not the point. The point is there's been a lot of shit breaking and not being replaced and nobody mentioning anything about it until I walk into work in the morning and have to figure out why shit like the fucking cash register isn't there today. So I'm kinda used to having to ask questions about big things that nobody bothered to update me on. I was out for two weeks recovering from a surgery, so I came to work this morning assuming there'd be some kind of bullshit, yeah?

So, the question I had to ask the chat this morning was:

Not a text I ever thought I'd have to send in sincerity, but there it is. Because what I found instead was a fenced off patch of discolored tiles and a few holes in the floor where my entire place of employment used to be.

And the answer? Nobody knows! It was there last night when the mall closed, and every single trace of the structure and all its contents including drink making supplies and our safe and cashbox was gone when it opened again. And when I say nobody knows, I mean everyone from last night's closers to the actual (former?) owner of the store jad no fucking clue about this until getting that text from me this morning. For once I am actually the first to know. 🎉.

So. I guess I didn't so much lose my job as had it stolen. Not by AI, but good old fashioned hands-on human beings picking it up and carrying it away somehow. All mall security would tell me was that they were instructed not to tell me anything and have us contact our management. Who also don't know anything. And later on I came across some construction workers around the gravesite of the kiosk discussing filling in the holes, asked them about it, and was told that they "weren't at liberty to say".

So, not only is my job gone in the most literal physical sense of the word, but it was taken in some kind of super secret kiosk extraction in the dead of night without any warning or witnesses and nobody is allowed to speak of it. The store owner said she was gonna figure it out 10 hours ago and still no word back.

I don't know what else to say aside from I've been laughing all day and I'm gonna have a hell of a time explaining Schrodinger's Unemployment to the benefits office.

[basuralindo]

Update that is not an update because I'm basically certain this isn't what actually happened:

My mother in law thinks the FBI took it.

Not any of the other stores around the state. Just the one little kiosk.

Why? Because she loves a conspiracy and is just a little bit extra.

Also because she was around for the massive crackdown on Yakuza-owned businesses in Waikiki (in her homestate) that did actually involve the FBI seizing stores (no confirmation of making kiosks cleanly disappear in the middle of the night though).

Still no word from my job on what's actually going on, but the most likely theory so far is that maybe the kiosk was on lease and got repossessed? The mystery continues

(also shout out to the person who proposed Carmen Sandiego)

[basuralindo]

ACTUAL (partial) UPDATE:

According to the owner, based on what she's been able to find out, the kiosk was not removed legally and they're starting a potentially long process of legal action. I hope she gets to sue the shit out of whoever did it but for now at least I know for sure I'm unemployed.

Really hoping for more details in terms of who/why/how, so I'll keep updating if I learn anything.

For now the summary is: An unnamed entity that is most likely mall management (on account of mall security cooperating with them) stole an entire kiosk and all the contents including money and machinery with barely a trace in the middle of the night grinch-style, with zero warning or explanation, and ensured the silence of both security and the construction crew, in an action that was definitely preplanned and illegal, and as far as I know nobody knows its whereabouts.

So now I'm officially out of a job. Because my workplace was literally stolen in the night.

[basuralindo]

Actually fuck it let's share some photos cause I wouldn't be inclined to believe this myself. It's not like anyone can stalk me at my job now and I'm not gonna have to see any coworkers that might find my tumblr.

Enjoy the unintentionally funniest text I've ever sent in my life

Aaand a close-up:

The last remains of a once Very Much Solid And Immobile Workplace

[basuralindo]

HEY HI HELLO THIS ONE'S MY FAVORITE

via @kagaminilen

[mysteryteacup]

[cut to a kiosk on legs, sipping a boba, while wandering into the nearest forest on chicken legs]

[ardanelvilyafeanturi]

Here you go @a-bit-too-dyscrasic

[sumrot]

Now I know something you don’t

[sillysiluriforme]

This week im seeing colors on heat maps I’ve never even considered before

[sillysiluriforme]

Evil fuck you purple heat storm over France

[trashlord-watson]

To the people who might go "yeah well that's a regular summer in [insert country or region]", I would like to point out the obvious that France (and other European countries curently suffering) is not these countries used to such heat for such mong periods of time.

Yes, it is finally summer, and yes, it's supposed to be hot too here. Except our hot temperatures are still way below that. The average temperatures at that period between 1991-2020 are 15-20°C below what we're experiencing. It's 41°C in Paris, Bordeaux, Toulouse, when it should be about 25, 42°C in Rennes when it should be 22.

On Tuesday 23rd, France was hotter than 99% of the planet. Only some specific zones in the Sahara, Arabian, and American deserts were hotter.

In the night between Monday and Tuesday, temperatures only came back down to between 21 and 28 degrees. Those are supposed to be the temps at day.

About A/C: it's true, most of the country doesn't have it. Some public transportation, supermarkets, restaurants have it, and some individual houses too. But that's about it. Because we didn't really need it until a few years ago, and it's both hard and expensive to get it installed, especially in older buildings like those in Paris. But also, you've got to understand that if A/C makes your life easier inside, it considerably worsens things outside. The heat generates by A/C would up the termps a few degrees more, and would not fix the issue of going outside.

[william-s-churros]

i think i saw a movie like this once

[maidslime]

Ok I needed to know the story and

Guy makes a really stupid decision and gets in a car accident -> no real damage from accident but insurance goes up -> starts beating himself up over his stupid decision -> gets depressed -> starts to realize he's single and had crash been worse he'd die alone -> realizes he's never had a relationship or even a crush and starts wondering what he'd want out of a relationship -> starts to realize he doesn't really like girls so he thinks he must be gay -> realizes he likes girls and boys about the same amount, so he must be bi -> later realizes that "same amount" is none at all -> he's ace

[eliotheman]

”This portrayal of a marginalized group was wrong then and is wrong now” and “This portrayal of a marginalized group was very progressive for the time period and paved the way for more representation while likely limited by factors outside of the creator’s control” are two statements that can and should ABSOLUTELY coexist and be kept in mind when interacting with older media

[lemonylemus]

Great example

[huffylemon]

[joyflameball]

The notes get 0 stars in reading comprehension

[enki2]

[blasesaint]

[apocryphics]

oh ok

[gorps]

[trinidemgyal-deactivated2026051]

[tgirlmaomao]

(forgetting the word erogenous) hey girl, are your horns an erogenous zone? (I remembered it at the end lol)

[that-house]

[iamoutofideas]

fucking sick of my insolent subjects

[bodyofdeath]

crossfaded on what no longer is and what remains to be seen

[orteil42]

there's this sort of default assumption online that you're meant to have watched the latest defunctland, hbomberguy or dan olson video in a manner i'd compare to "catch the game last night?"

[parkchanwoohoo]

The anger that drove the making of this is so palpable I can't stop laughing