one of the tweets of all time to me
mustard snob canon
todays bird
Monterey Bay Aquarium

blake kathryn
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

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Misplaced Lens Cap
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NASA

Discoholic 🪩
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cherry valley forever

titsay
YOU ARE THE REASON
The Bowery Presents

tannertan36

★

Love Begins

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
Claire Keane

seen from Singapore
seen from Venezuela

seen from Japan
seen from United States

seen from Australia

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Canada
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia

seen from Malaysia
seen from Ecuador

seen from Malaysia
seen from Norway

seen from France

seen from United States

seen from France
seen from United States

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seen from Germany
@general-goods
one of the tweets of all time to me
mustard snob canon
A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier. The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man says, “All right, all right. I’m *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?” The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.” The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.” The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.” The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.” The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?” The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst. Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.” The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound. But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk
Originally posted by disneyasastrology
BWAHAHAHAHAH.
the way i learned this, it was always told through spoken word. And you’d do the door thing for ages. AGES. literally just making up any old material. ‘behind the foam door is a door made of spinach’ that kind of shit. Go on until whoever is listening has already begged you to stop and has now gone on to pleading, clutching your shirt on their knees pleading. And when you finally said the last line? People went fucking nuts Like there was a good chance of just getting the teeth knocked out of you after telling that joke.
A friend of mine did that shit for 30 minutes on a camp once. The entire fucking bus just exploded in anger when she finished. It was a fucking massacre.
Necessary and sufficient
Adding a second lock was not necessary.
Understanding the difference between necessary and sufficient is necessary, but not sufficient to earn a math degree.
its important to me that all y'all know that mannertee has an arch nemesis
his name is Ikanzame and he's a shark with bad driving etiquette!!
ikanzame!!! your people of virginia desire you carnally!!!!
interesting kink assortment on the dash
big fan of slug play
I started looking up 'petplay but youre a slug' on tumblr so I could reblog the original post and I got the 'hold your horses we're not showing you the results of your search' thing. fuck this stupid site that won't even let me be a freak in peace. LET ME REBLOG POSTS ABOUT TAKING THREE HOURS TO EAT A CARROT
so abstract algebra pilled rn that i searched "image of rings" and was shocked when i got this
via Seattle Times:
Local Ballard raccoon has been spotted thriving in a remarkably unique and charming body
Yes he(?)'s actually factually real and has even been given an extremely millennial nickname: Jimothy. Wildlife experts advise everyone to just leave him alone and let him live his life
He is healthy and thriving.
Let him live his best life.
passing in public makes me feel like white shrek
literally how it feels
my understanding of the petplay dog clicker thing is that people seem to be utilizing classical conditioning to make their girlfriends associate having sex with having sex
nip over to troy, bit of rough and tumble, big horse, bish bash bosh, back home to ithaca. simple as
@sercezgazety
take your pick