glub

if you follow me youre consenting to seeing homestuck

[nohaijiachi]

I am consistently delighted by @justcakethanks eridian welcoming committee comics, and I *HAD* to do something with their template lmfao, I love these little guys!!!

[parkchanwoohoo]

I beg my kidnappers for a phone, swearing not to make any calls or texts, and they stare over my shoulder, holding a gun to my head as I use my newly-freed hand to post, "So do like, dudes just buy ropes and baklavas from the same store or what lmfao like a specialty Crime Store"

One of the kidnappers says "balaclavas" but it's muffled under the fabric. I ask them to repeat and they do, their voice raspy from disuse. "You wrote baklava, that's a pastry." The other kidnapper goes "stfu" and then after a pause goes "Why would you buy from a crime store"

[godisafujoshi]

Then they spit roast me

[parkchanwoohoo]

I didn't wanna say this but now that someone's left this kind of comment I have to be honest: Everyone else's tags are funny but this is the only person who understood my vision for this scenario

[everybidenjusthavegoodtime]

i finally found the best youtube comment

[hellsitegenetics]

String identified: !!! at a gat g t t ’ a t ’ ac a t t t ct

Closest match: Equus caballus genome assembly, chromosome: 9 Common name: Horse

(image source)

[ooppo]

A PORN BOT UNFOLLOWED ME?

[ooppo]

not that i care

[ooppo]

[superbeans89]

I had an idea, sorry

[beardedmrbean]

Is this from Muppet's Goncharov?

[assortedcrackers]

It is! Only the directors cut though.

[swanlakereturns]

me and the other girls are have been telling each other 'draw steel' whenever we mildly inconvenience each other lol yeah ive lost 2 fingers

[important-animal-images]

[astarlightstrawberry]

Meanwhile, in a certain someone's office:

I never considered kismesissitude to be a cute relationship dynamic but Gorgor and Galekh convinced me anything is possible.

[prettyyinpunk]

#mytwuck

[homunculus-argument]

Transitioning gives you interesting perspective on how peoples' perception of your build changes more than your build actually does. I'm about 3 cm taller than the national female average where I'm from, and in my teens was just the most basic default settings standard-average build bitch. Can carry buckets of rocks and do other shitty yard work, separate two fighting dogs, is just fine walking 4 km home drunk in heels, short skirt and fishnet stockings at 2 am in a blizzard. Hoes are immune to frost damage anyway. Can't kill one of them things. Could be strapped on a yoke to plough a field if you don't have an ox.

But eight years on testosterone, ID changed and top surgery healed, I'm the same damn build and people will ask if I'm ok managing things that I'm perfectly fine with. Had a doctor who was 100% aware of my robust health describe my build as "delicate". I first wondered whether my boyfriend's family doesn't actually consider me male over being reluctant about letting me do physical outdoor work, before I noted that they're totally fine with his sister doing the same kind of work. And she's anemic and allergic to the fucking sun.

I'm about the same weight and height as I was when I was 16, but somehow a 16-year-old girl can be expected to have the relative strength and resilience of a cockroach, but a 30-something man the size of a 16-year-old girl is something that might die if someone sneezes too loud.

[toothpaste-footlocker]

I’m distracted from the point here, I know, but your description of a “most basic default settings standard-average build bitch” is a draft animal hauling rocks & competing in the Highland Games while wearing heels during a blizzard.

OP, are you from Krypton??? Were you walking home from the bar in Themyscira? Did we finally figure out the setting of Xena?? Where are these standard issue rock hauling field plowing women?? I want to go to there.

[homunculus-argument]

I'm from Finland.

[jame7t]

ai-generated YouTube thumbnails are pretty convenient because you can tell from a glance the video won’t be very good & isn’t worth watching

[mushroominaforest]

Shout out to the doctor who responded with complete sincerity when I (on anesthesia) uttered the phrase “chat are we cooked” in her medical professional vicinity. You’re such a real one for that fr fr

[toskarin]

guy who's in initial d but doesn't know about all that: honey our tofu is on time as usual

[hazard-symbols-that-fuck-hard]

scientists don’t shoot and kill each other like they used to

[simperius]

please elaborate on this

[hazard-symbols-that-fuck-hard]

scientists used to shoot and kill each other a lot

[fleshinstinct]

ao oni comic

[pangur-and-grim]

oh..... I interrupted.

[cutecipher]

pointing at his fuzzy

[rickybabyboy]

mom disrespectful my fuzzy