I've been in a longterm toxic relationship that has isolated me and has brought me to a place where i dont know who i am any more. i dont feel real without them. ive lost connections with others ive lost nearly everything. they are in the shape of bottles, cans, fuzzy months and years of drowning myself in them. ive spent time, and every cent on being able to be with them. addiction comes in many forms and mine is in losing myself any chance i get. those who know me like this loss. i am fun. dancing and full of life. but i am mainly full on vodka or anything that is there. this addiction shows people a light in me that is simultaneously diming my life light, my heart light. i am in pain and the only ease is this relationship with addiction that fills me and empties me. the addiction stays and people always leave. as they should. i am full of toxins, physically and mentally.












