Ok so like
A lot of the angsty “Ford does kick Stan out at the end of Summer” (either because weirdmagedeon doesn’t happen, the Zodiac does work, etc etc) kinda operate off of the notion that like. Stan has like no savings and would be homeless
But like. What if Stan did have a lot of savings. What if he was so successful with the mystery shack and various other scams he’d run over the years of living in gravity falls that he actually not earned enough to pay Ford’s mortgage, the ridiculously high portal energy bills, and all the repairs he’d had to make to the shack over the summer, and he still had enough money left over that he actually had enough to like. Buy another house. What then
Like. Sure he’s stingy but that’s not necessarily because he has no extra money, but more a kind of trauma response from so many years of having nothing, the mindset is just sort of engrained in him that no matter how much money he has he never truly feels “safe” and still feels like he has to pinch pennies in every way he can. And he had no money when Gideon stole the shack—but what if that’s because all of his money is literally hidden inside the shack. Like, he doesn’t trust banks so it’s all hidden in hidden compartments—maybe some of them even being in the basement—that Gideon never found (or, if he did find them, simply wasn’t interested—he has enough money, what he wants is magical power!). And so when he gets the shack back he got all of his savings back
Like. If he did have plenty of money what would happen when ford kicked him out. Would he still end up homeless—not because he couldn’t afford to buy a new house, but because the shack was his, some place he’d made truly his own, where he’d spent half of his life—and he doesn’t want to live anywhere else (and besides, even if he has enough money to buy a house and then some, he’s still jobless right now). And gravity falls… it may have been a crazy town in the middle of nowhere full of dangerous creatures and idiotic townsfolk, but it was his town. Would he want to live anywhere else? Would he simply be a homeless wandering, driving from hotel room to hotel room, because without the mystery shack, without gravity falls, without his family, he feels there is nowhere he will truly belong?
Or.
Funny option
What if he stayed in gravity falls
And just
Had another mystery shack built.
Can. Can u imagine
Ford is all angsty when Stan moves out and is regretting that he told Stan to but can’t bring himself to take it back but now the house feels so empty without Stan and he misses him and maybe the shack wasn’t so bad and maybe he made a huge mistake and what if he’s gone forever—
Only to discover that. There’s ANOTHER mystery shack being built?? And. Stan is just. Still living in town?
He’s happy about this but also mad for some reason and has just a whole complicated mess of emotions about it. Like he’s glad Stan is still there but he’s also mad that he was angsting about Stan being gone for nothing and also isn’t super happy about Stan opening his god awful tourist attraction again (at least it’s not in ford’s house this time but it still makes a mockery of anomalies, ford’s life work!)
Ford runs into Stan and proceeds to put his foot in his mouth. Just says the absolute worst things that just reinforce to Stan that ford doesn’t care about him (something of course ford doesn’t realize Stan thinks). Just like… asks Stan why he’s still living in town, but of course because of the tone ford uses without realizing it, Stan immediately gets snappy and defensive and is like “so? Just because you said I couldn’t live in your house, suddenly I can’t live in the town at all too? I get wanting me out of your house, since you own it and all, but you have no right to expect me to stay out of the entire town—one I’ve lived in 30 years, far longer than even you! What, “this town ain’t big enough for the two of us”?
And then of course ford snaps back at him and it escalates into a whole argument
And then they just. Exist living in the same town. Stan has been burned by ford too many times and is convinced Ford doesn’t love him so he’s just trying to avoid ford at all costs, and when he does see him he’s always pretty snappy at him.
Meanwhile ford is angry at Stan but misses him and feels lonely living alone again and doesn’t understand why Stan is being so difficult (he doesn’t realize just how deeply he wounded Stan, he doesn’t realize just how bad their relationship is from Stan’s perspective, he’s never doubted Stan’s love for him so he doesn’t imagine Stan doubting his love) but Ford refuses to apologize to Stan or tell them that he misses him so he just. Keeps conveniently running into him. Yes hello Stan I noticed some mushrooms growing near your new home and I needed to investigate them. Hmm they’re gone now. How mysterious. They must be disappearing mushrooms! Perhaps they went invisible or teleported away! I need to stay near your house for several hours to investigate this
And also somehow keeps ending up in/around Stan’s house and fixing things?? Like hello Stanley I was chasing an anomaly and it broke your window so I fixed it for you. You’re welcome. And also while I was fixing your window I noticed a bulb was burnt out so I replaced it with one that will last for 1000 years.
(To make it even more ridiculous: maybe some of the stuff ford fixes is stuff that didn’t even really need fixing or that ford broke himself. That light bulb was inferior to the ones ford invented! It would have broken anyway so if ford… sped up the process. Well, it doesn’t really matter! Now Stan will never have to replace the light bulb again!)
And of course, because ford is such a caring brother, he also wards Stan’s house against magical dangers (that may or may not have actually been a problem at all) that Stan didn’t want or ask for—but really, Stan should be thanking him! With his brother’s… charming personality, he’s bound to piss off a dangerous supernatural creature sometime, so really, why is Stan complaining that ford randomly showed up out of the blue and “start sprinkling fairy dust and magical crap all around his house and chanting creepy shit like a weirdo.” He’s just trying to look out for him!
(Ford thinks that maybe if he fixes enough things for him, if he helps him out… maybe Stan will stop being so angry at him. Ford is trying to show that he cares but going about it in the most roundabout way possible)
Bonus: it would be funny if Stan talked to the Corduroys and had them build the new mystery shack EXACTLY like the old one. Like, aside from the basement, the floor plan and everything is completely identical. Ford is annoyed by this and thinks Stan is just copying him. Stan just wants the familiarity, just wants to feel like he didn’t truly lose the only home he ever made his own. Actually now that I say that maybe that isn’t funny at all akdnskfnskfn
