I Ate'nt Dead

hai, I'm rowie (they/she). TMA. I reblog stuff. somewhere round 28y, from Aotearoa (NZ). Transfem sapphic.

[kaijuno]

[the-insidious-dr-grey-matter]

Patrick Stewart dancing and singing on the bridge of USS Enterprise-D. Originally filmed in 1991 as a birthday suprise for Gene Roddenberry, it wasn't meant for public viewing but a copy was made and later included as a DVD bonus.

[sandmandaddy69]

[schakira]

hey not to advertise these twats (so don't look them up) but some absolute fucks in paris allegedly created a service where you can "rent air conditioning" (taking advantage of a climate apocalypse) and they make you pay 700€ a month for AC that costs 200€ for life.

[schakira]

image descriptions and translations:

[social media screenshot from Le Parisien, a french journal "renting instead of buying AC, the good deal proposed by [Don't-Look-Them-Up] mid-heatwave."]

[journal article from Le Parisien that reads: "renting instead of buying AC, the good deal proposed by [Don't-Look-Them-Up] mid-heatwave.

Since the start of the summer, acquiring an AC has been challenging. To answer to buyers who are faced with empty storefronts, [Don't-Look-Them-Up] has found a trick: the punctual rental of cooling units."]

ahem. and the review

[One-Star Review: Crooks that profit off of people's distress. He made me an offer for a 9000 BTu AC unit (valued at 280€) for 750€ per month. To avoid.]

[schakira]

they admitted in a video that they bought all the AC units DURING A BIG HEATWAVE all over Paris to empty all stocks, so that people would rely on them to get AC.

there were 3000 deaths due to the heatwave.

[leafstem]

*while sewing*: you are a fabric. you can stay a fabric. you do not yearn to return to being string.

[batbetbitbotbut]

*while spinning*: you are a thread. you can stay a thread. you do not yarn to return to being fluff.

[strikeslip]

*while embroidering*: you are a thread on a needle. you can just exist as thread on a needle. you do knot yearn to become a tangle.

[mawofthemagnetar]

*while turning wood* you are timber on a lathe. You can stay as timber on a lathe. You do not yearn to become a live hand grenade.

[finalset]

adhd is like I think it’s gonna take me fifteen minutes to fill up my water bottle

[beardedmrbean]

Periscope up

[birds-in-posts]

Green heron (Butorides virescens)

[flareonfloof]

birds have secret bones we're not allowed to know about

[sapphic-machine]

This is like lingerie for electronics

[virtualgirladvance]

my first love...

[tredlocity]

[lazer-exe]

I'm gonna say it, I do think that even the laziest person imaginable should have a roof over their head, food in their stomach, and access to healthcare

[prokopetz]

I'm currently living in a two-cat household, and there's a thing that happens where the first cat is calling for me, the second cat shows up like "you rang?", and the first cat immediately smacks the second cat in the face like "not you, knucklehead". They do this every day.

[targetedknowledge]

[pkpaulshow]

[the-gr3y]

When u look so bad a homie comes in just to roast you

[wereralph]

IM DYING

[poorlytimed-deactivated20190607]

I’m him

[kaity--did]

Tonight on My Husband Doesn’t Know How to Baby Talk

“Ma’am, are you aware that these, right here are your hands? They belong to you. And you get to decide what happens with them. So when you use these hands to pull your binky out of your mouth that is not necessarily a dad problem. I’ll fix it obviously i just want you to acknowledge it’s not my fault”

[kaity--did]

Husband: ma’am it has been reported lately that you do in fact have tiny little toes and a little button nose, do you care to comment?

Penny Rose: Babbles in Baby

Husband: RIVETING!

[kaity--did]

Penny Rose: Does that High Pitched Baby Yell ™️

Husband: Let it out friend! Feel your feelings!

[kaity--did]

Me: Hehehe silly husband doesn’t know how to do baby talk

All of tumblr collectively at my husband:

[kaity--did]

Penny Rose: does a sad baby scream

Husband: you don’t even have to understand taxes yet! I can explain them but you’ve got several years before that’s relevant!

Penny Rose: wide eyes, staring at her father, almost intrigued

Husband: I lied to you Penny your mother does our taxes. Do you want to know about arbitration? I know all about arbitration.

[kaity--did]

THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND

yes he just walks around the house and talks to her like this

[kaity--did]

Penny Rose: Cooing as twinkle twinkle little star plays

Husband: Now Penny there is a lot of misinformation out there in the world and I hate to tell you this but the moon is in fact not made of cheese. That is a conspiracy theory pushed by Big Dairy.

????

[kaity--did]

Husband: Holds Penny Rose up to her reflection in the microwave

Husband: you see Penny Rose! This was the M. Night Shyamalan twist! You were mirror baby all along!

[kaity--did]

FYI this is how you get a Deals Warlock if you were wondering

[justplainsalty]

I have follow up questions:

1) Did you participate in baby talk to make up for your husband's deficit, or did you also opt to speak to the Deals Warlock like a very tiny adult from babyhood?

1a) If you participated in baby talk with Penny, did she ever do any code switching with you while she was learning to talk (I mean, babyish talk back to you but fully formed adult like you share with us to Lawyer Dad)?

[kaity--did]

I didn't baby talk with her very much either! I think I squealed at her more than my husband did.

Something funny that has happened is that while she formally calls me Mama when she's answering me in passing she does call me "My Darling Love" and I don't know for sure but I think it's because I call her and her father "my loves" and her father calls me and her "darlings" and she's created a mash up 😂

So I'll say "okay penny it's time for bed" and I'll just hear "okay my darling love!" 😂

[kaity--did]

Everyone is always so so kind on this post but I do want to warn you all that this did in fact lead to an insanely verbal child, and if you choose that life you have to commit to that life.

Penny Rose is now 5 years old and she

1. Starts talking the moment she opens her eyes to the moment she passes out at night

2. Asks, and I am not exaggerating I counted, an average of 892 questions a day

3. Does not accept "I don't know" as an answer to said questions, will usually have a follow up question as to why you don't know OR a suggestion on how we can find out together

I pay for limitless data and have 709 Google tabs open on my phone at all times

[ganymedeshouse]

Why he look like 👽

[todays-xkcd]

NGS and IERS are complaining that they left CLEAR instructions to set the washing machine to WGS84 (G2296) instead of WGS84 (G730).

Latitude and Longitude [Explained]

Transcript Under the Cut

[An image of the Earth showing most of Europe, Asia, Africa, and the Indian Ocean, with horizontal latitude lines and vertical longitude lines looking like a balloon tied tightly with string - like the lines are squeezed down into the surface.]

[Caption below the panel:] Bad news: NASA accidentally shrank Earth's latitude and longitude lines in the wash.

[s0fich]

[s0fich]

happy in his blankeyy