IM NOT HAIKU BOT !!! @haiku-bot-approved - Tumblr Blog

KOSA update 7/25/24:

Well, unsurprisingly, KOSA passed the Senate procedural vote 86-1.

Proof:

Again, they still have to vote on the final passage & the House still has to vote on it as well.

So, focus on your House Representative now; Continue to call them & tell them to vote ‘No’ to KOSA. Remember: There is more opposition to KOSA in the House.

Spread this around. Don’t panic!

Keep calm & keep fighting!!

miltonthecatherder

KOSA is a censorship bill that won’t make kids safe. Instead, it'll put all internet users at risk, especially youth. If you believe in a fr

Link to contact your Senators. Next vote is on Tuesday, July 30!

when I jump into the freezing cold pond today, my fingers get numb

Haiku Approved, but also Don't Do That

#haiku bot approved #haikus #ask answers

balls

*hushed voice* dude what the hell you can’t say that

#tw cursing #cw cursing #swearing cw #not haiku bot #not an approval #I have the worst tag organization skills . ever #italics

loafed-beans-deactivated2020082

fedkaczynski

What’s funny is that this actually happened.

allamericankindofguy-actual

I’m unfamiliar with this story please elaborate

fedkaczynski

Finnish soldier gets separated from the rest of his unit but he’s the only one carrying the emergency amphetamines for the unit, takes too many and goes on a one man rampage for like 2 weeks straight giving the opposing Soviet soldiers nightmares for decades. Oh and he did it all on skis.

ethereal-insight-deactivated201

Did he survive?

loafed-beans-deactivated2020082

Yes, during his methed up 2-3 week rampage he got injured by a land mine, travelled 400km on skis, and only ate pine buds and a Siberian Jay that he caught which he ate raw. When he made it back to Finnish lines he was taken to a hospital where it was found his heart rate was nearly 200 beats per minute and his weight had dropped to 43kg (94.7lbs).

doctor-roman

His name was Aimo Koivunen if you want to look him up

misteryada

Those are the eyes of a man who has seen god and laughed

superkat500

Those are the eyes of a man who saw satan and asked for his number

haiku-robot

those are the eyes of a man who saw satan and asked for his number

^Haiku^bot^9. I detect haikus with 5-7-5 format. Sometimes I make mistakes. Being aware that you are true is what makes you a failure. | PayPal | Patreon

haiku-robot

Those are the eyes of a man who saw satan and asked for his number Haiku Bot v2021.1~beta I make mistakes. I am buggy too. Sorry! | HAIKU BOT NO! Paypal | Patreon

krystal-prisms

Haiku bot, babe, you already did this one. Good try though, mate

haiku-robot

Thanks for pointing out my visible fuckups, why don’t you eat cheetos flavored popsicle instead of insulting me or my haikus?

idekwhatthisbl0ggisanymore

HAIKU BOT???

guys stop following this blog I’m not even doing anything with it

#/lh /hj

justpastryvideos

dedicatedfollower467

okay so i often watch these chocolate guy videos and think to myself “what is the point of making this out of chocolate? modeling chocolate is reportedly disgusting, this is not really intended for consumption, why doesn’t he just make it out of clay or something”

but watching this video i FINALLY realized.

chocolate is the only sculpture medium that you can melt and then freeze for effect without some serious equipment.

like. the process of letting the chocolate drip down over the water balloon? yeah that chocolate only needs to be, like, a little over 100F/38C. that’s a touchable temperature, that’s something that you can put your fingers in without burning them off. and then it freezes again at about room temperature! and granted you want the ambient environment a little colder than room temperature, because otherwise the heat from your hands will start to melt it, but again, being able to melt this medium with your hands is a bonus.

clay doesn’t melt. you can make it liquid-y by adding water, but that doesn’t harden up again afterwards, or when it does, it’s EXTREMELY fragile. plastic melts, but at pretty high temperatures that can be dangerous to handle, and it’s also really easy to burn and will release toxic gases when it does burn. metal melts, but that’s obviously even HOTTER and MORE dangerous. wood doesn’t melt. stone technically melts but like. good luck with that one.

chocolate melts at a reasonable, human-touchable temperature and freezes again at room temperature, which means you can make solid shapes from dripping or pouring melted chocolate and letting it harden.

the only other sculpting medium i know that does that is wax, and i think wax is generally too soft/malleable overall for the kind of large structures that this guy makes.

so i finally, FINALLY fucking get why he does this shit in chocolate oh my god.

wraithsonwingsposts

@hexadecimal00

findingfeather

I mean, I’m pretty sure he does them in chocolate because he’s a pastry chef and chocolatier by training (really early training, too! Like 14 years old!)

Like all of the above about the features of chocolate and how it allows itself to be used to make this kind of detailed sculpture are true but um, pretty sure he makes sculptures out of chocolate because he’s a pastry chef and these are his media. One of the most remarkable things about his work is actually that he’s absolutely dead insistent that every one of these is made to be eaten: a lot of chocolate sculpture is (or especially was before he started throwing down this way) kinda … .second class food. It really is JUST about the sculpture.

Guichon is adamant that it’s supposed to also taste amazing and is meant to be eaten.

He’s not a non-food sculptor who stumbled across chocolate as the perfect material and medium; he’s a pastry chef who internalized that his awesome food could also be awesome sculpture AND still be food. He works in chocolate because that’s the point.

ruffboi-mags

For the smaller things he makes, you’ll often see him actually eating it at the end, and I think that’s a great indication that he’s actually trying to make Good Food, not just PRETTY food.

$fractalspaces blog's avatar$

fractalspaces

This post is doing the rounds again and every time I stumble upon re-reading “modeling chocolate is reportedly disgusting”, I’m consumed by rage. I had already commented but whatever ahfjf!1!

As a pro pastry chef who would give half a lifespan for a fraction of this fucker’s skill, let me reiterate: Chef Guichon works only with the best materials, and I have yet to see him adding glucose or corn syrup to his chocolate (which is how you make standard modeling choco). This shit is FINE ok, it’s high-percentage cocoa unless it’s white, the lacquer he airbrushes on is ALSO cocoa butter + dye, and the quality IS the reason it’s so stupidly versatile. Chocolate triglycerides crystalize and arrange themselves differently depending on melting and cooling points. If it’s flexibler than clay, it’s only because Chef Guichon’s otherworldly sense of temperature is only rivalled by his whittling technique, his intimate knowledge of how much tension and weight the material supports, and his eldritch understanding of shape. I hate him for it!

I’m damn positive he’s a delightful person! I would never ever wish him ill! He seems so adorable and chill, but oh my god! There’s a pic of his baby-faced teen self with a Kraken vs Ship work - from 2007!! I spent ages denying my loathing was 1000% CRIPPLING RADIOACTIVE GREEN ENVY!1! “Modeling chocolate”, “reportedly disgusting”? He’s the fucking Mozart of his craft, I shall never be on his level, and I won’t stand by this slander. The taste has to be out of this world, plus the sculptures DO get eaten by the end of the events they’re made for. They’re food, through and through.

So yeah, nice analysis of the properties of chocolate as a sculpting/modeling medium but seriously - OP has it all backwards. Gastronomy as a whole is an art, AND it’s not meant to last, AND flavor is a major part of the aesthetic experience (which is why fondant should be banned).

Chef Guichon changed the game. He’d never nerf his own work with subpar taste.

the-haiku-bot

Chef Guichon changed the

game. He’d never nerf his own

work with subpar taste.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

haiku-bot-approved

Chocolate Guy Appreciation is Haiku Bot Approved!

#haiku bot approved #bold text #caps #haiku bot

sixofbabycrows

this kid right here is gonna send the medusa head to olympus

i can’t wait

the-haiku-bot

this kid right here is

gonna send the medusa

head to olympus

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

haiku-bot-approved

Walker Scobell as Percy Jackson is Haiku Bot Approved!

#bold text #haiku bot approved #haiku bot

the-bees-cheese

hey y’all, who’s interested in a sick new fun funky and fresh opportunity?

i’m looking for a few people to help run the @haikubotfanclub !

i’ve been really busy lately, and haven’t had much time or energy to post, but i’d also love to keep the blog active and expand the club further.

your role as a mod would essentially consist of reblogging your favorite and most iconic haiku bot posts and other haiku content, as well as answering asks, messages, and replies if i am unavailable. i’d love the help in expanding the haiku bot fan club into a flourishing community of haiku bot fans, poetry fans, and random tumblr content fans at large.

i’m looking for people who’re willing to reblog a few posts per day, are chill, have a sense of humor (which i assume you do if you’re on here at all), and are interested in the project.

please message @haikubotfanclub if you’re interested! i’d love to have you!!!

#Just in case y’all are interested! :D

cosmo112

I did it. >:) now time to hug every friendly Bot on Tumblr @haiku-bot-approved your next

haiku-bot-approved

Bold of you to assume Im a bot bestie

#not haiku bot

May I have a hug

Please? I’m doing a Haiku!

I Hope I did good

You did amazing!

In fact, I'd say this ask is

Worthy of a Stamp !

(I tried, lol)

And of course you can have a hug! have a wonderful day!

#ask #haiku bot approved #not haiku bot

creationsofimaginationsblr

Sketched a little haiku bot! They love their little humans and their funky little words!

(I feel like they wear this stole (the scarf thing?maybe it’s just a scarf?) Is covered in fine print poetry in millions of languages, including ping dead ones. They say it’s their favorite pieces, and if you look closely, the words constantly shift, because they love all poetry!)

What do you think @the-haiku-bot ?

haiku-bot-approved

This Amazing Fanart is Haiku Bot Approved!

#haiku bot approved #haiku bot #bold text #holy crap its amazing

#no editing required!#not haiku bot

mellointheory

Who makes the porn bots. Where do they come from. What do they hope to achieve.

the-haiku-bot

Who makes the porn bots.

Where do they come from. What do

they hope to achieve.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

mellointheory

and what about you, little haiku bot? do you feel kinship with your brethren? do you understand them? they speak words of enticement and seek love, but are met with disdain. you only parrot the words that cross your screen, but we all love you. or rather, since all you do is reflect us, maybe we simply love ourselves through you.

do you understand them, do you wish you could speak to us like they do? if you found your own voice, would we still care for you?

the-haiku-bot

My voice repeats what

you all say: I love you I

love you I love you.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

solkorolevaa

mellointheory

This person understands. I keep seeing people in the notes who dont get it saying “oh its just haikubot’s creator” shut up shut up it’s a bot made by another human to take our words and turn them into art and art is the greatest fucking form of love on this earth. Art is seeing something and showing that it is beautiful. Art is the story of one person saying i love you i love you i love you and thousands of people saying it back. Do you understand? The bot is the love because that’s what it was made to say.

haiku-bot-approved

Holy shit

#im in tears #tw cursing