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novis-canis-deactivated20200504

Once again its 3am and this washing machine wizard haunts me

novis-canis-deactivated20200504

[Audio ID]

*washing machine beating noises come from behind the door at a steady rhythm*

*door creaks slightly as its opened*

Cowboy Wizard, in a sing songy country tune: "wellllllll you get down to fiddle and you get down to bowl, ya kick off yer shoes and ya throw em on the floor. Ya dancin' in the kitchen till the mornin' lightttt~ till the lousi-"

(audio cuts out before he can finish the word lousiana)

novis-canis-deactivated20200504

Once again its 3am and this washing machine wizard haunts me

novis-canis-deactivated20200504

[Audio ID]

*washing machine beating noises come from behind the door at a steady rhythm*

*door creaks slightly as its opened*

Cowboy Wizard, in a sing songy country tune: "wellllllll you get down to fiddle and you get down to bowl, ya kick off yer shoes and ya throw em on the floor. Ya dancin' in the kitchen till the mornin' lightttt~ till the lousi-"

(audio cuts out before he can finish the word lousiana)

lesbian-toddhoward

im going to fucking die

doobler2

I unironically love every second

tonakings

I don’t know wtf i just watched but i love it with every fiber of my being

theraddy

The first time I saw this it was captioned “gendry, the hound and arya in the forge in 8x01”

im-leaving-this-blog-now-bye-de

the mcu’s only Big Dick Energy movies. no i won’t accept any criticism because i’m objectively and irrefutably right.

presidentrhodes

Excuse me, ma'am, please also consider:

im-leaving-this-blog-now-bye-de

this is the only valid criticism i’m accepting because you’re right. how could i forget the film that said fuck you to racist villain stereotypes and gave us the first male superhero to canonically and explicitly suffer from anxiety and ptsd? im a fool. this is an oversight that will never happen again. i promise you.

memetokyo

This is my new favorite thing on the Internet

drozvx

me: is that who i think it is

lizzo: BITCH me: yyep

ginocchie

as a child i was always amazed by how fast adults could chop onions and then before you know it you’re chopping onions very fast and that’s it that’s life

miss-perkey

butchdotgov

Millennial Sisyphus keeps entering all the information from his resume into the web form, only for it to delete everything when he tries to move to the next page. He just goes back and types it all up again, over and over again, forever, and he never gets a job.

crystalandrock

Millennial Tantalus has been promised that his unpaid internship will become a paid position as soon as the company has space for him. Every week he sees their new job posting. Every week he asks his boss if he can have a real job. The boss shrugs apologetically and says he’ll just have to make do with being paid in experience a little longer. He goes back and keeps working, over and over again, forever, and he never reaches the fruits of his labors.

fiftysevenacademics

Millennial Persephone can’t get a job without a degree, but because she had to take out loans to pay for college, she must spend 1/3 of her life working just to pay them off.

sci-fantasy

Millennial Cassandra’s title is Social Media Coordinator, she was hired to be the expert, but every time she tries to explain the problems in her company’s social media decisionmaking, the managers don’t listen…and end up hiring expensive PR flacks to repair the damage to their reputation when things blow up exactly as she predicted.

necrofuturism

Millennial Medusa uses multiple shades of primer and opaque foundation to cover the scars snaking across her face, hiding the bruises, aligning the asymmetry in her broken nose and jaw. Red matte on the lips, green shimmer on the lids. Flawless liner on the first try. She’s had lots and lots of practice. She films her transformation in secret for all to see and learn, and again, men are turned to anonymous stone faces screaming in horror. “Liar!” “Witch!” “Take her swimming on the first date!” These words do not discourage her. These words are a challenge. GlamGorgonXx posts another video.

mao-tenno

Millennial Prometheus uploads another PDF to his site. He’s lost track of the printing and edition of this textbook. He knows they just rearranged some of chapters then charge 150 dollars per copy, and the professor wrote the book himself. the ZIP fills uploads successfully, and he starts uploading the next one. He isn’t afraid of the potential lawsuit. knowledge shouldn’t held out of reach like this.

i-will-not-be-caged

Millennial Circe screenshots all the lewd messages she gets from men on online dating sites and posts them on her very popular Instagram along with their pictures and usernames. When people accuse her of attempting to destroy their reputations, she insists she’s just revealing them for the pigs they truly are.