wild improvisations

writer (on ao3 as annhamilton)

[eleanoreparker]

You weren't in school today, Charlie Brown. All the kids missed you. I'm never going to school again as long as I live.

A BOY NAMED CHARLIE BROWN 1969, dir. Bill Melendez

[fallingtowers]

George: thats all he would say, was "keep administering the shocks, keep going."

jerry: so what did you do??

george: what do you think i did? i kept administering the shocks!

jerry : even though you could hear the person on the other end--

george: well what was i supposed to do!

jerry: --screaming and begging for mercy?

george: "keep going, keep shocking him," the guy was telling me! *puts his head in his hands* he was in charge of the experiment, he was paying me, what was i supposed to do? tell him to go suck a lemon?

jerry: so what you're telling me is, you were just following orders?

*kramer enters wearing a brand new pork pie hat with the price tag still on*

kramer: guess who just got paid to sit around in a room pretending to get electrocuted all day!

[psychwardchic]

I've been thinking about this for days. Best fake Seinfeld episode

[powerbottombrucespringsteen]

I do genuinely believe that Matt Damon and Ben Affleck are heterosexual but i think that was like a genetic mistake and they were supposed to be lovers but since they can’t (because they’re straight) that’s why they’re like that

[only-tiktoks]

[sypon]

I didn’t see this link in the reblogs but I love Mercury and she has a book out called “Safe & Sound: A Renter-Friendly Guide to Home Repair”. She is one of those beautiful souls who love to teach people new skills with compassion and joy, instead of putting down others for not having knowledge about (what others may consider basic home repairs and DIY.

Mercury Stardust

Mercury Stardust

[rosslynpaladin]

I love this lady. She's like a friendly big sister here to show you how to do stuff.

[catchymemes]

[stars-bean]

The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (1988 - 1992) dir. Carole Beers and Karl Geurs

[jerry-hornes-foot]

Trying to watch hannibal without subtitles:

Hannibal: Mmmbdmsnn, Will? Did you sjduk mmfndm hdudhebjsbj jdjdinsk?

Will: I don't even know who I mnfmmd dmdjndm sndmnd even when shhsmmdi ajsjdjdm mcmcmcm... ndjdnmd mind.....

The music:

[thatqueerweirdo]

[ID: a screenshot of a YouTube video titled "Dropping Metal Plates ~ Crashing Silverware ~ Drop Pan Sound Effects". End ID]

[menecrates]

i think people forget that its ok to like some bad music. everyone likes bad music. and not all shallow music is bad. yeah sure maybe this song about partying is just about partying but so what. people at parties probably want good party songs. like if your top song on spotify is one of the latest pop hits theres literally nothing wrong with that. its messed up that people get all high and mighty about listening to weevil and the heebiejeebies or whatever while shitting on some other person for liking mainstream artists.

[menecrates]

happy spotify wrapped season or whatever what an important time to remember this

[nando161mando]

If you want to know why people have lost faith in capitalism, this might help

[thatqueerchoirkid]

What the fuck

[soberscientistlife]

Jesus H. Christ!

[brendering]

Show this to every person you know over age 50. 99.9% of the people giving young folks flack about "not wanting to work" (even though over a third of us are already working 2 or more jobs) or "being selfish" (even though we're the most-giving generations in history, especially when you look at the amount we give vs our income) as reasons for living with parents, other family, or roommates? Most of the people spewing that crap bought a house in the 80s or sooner. They could work in a gd mail room and afford rent, or work for a summer to pay for college that year. I know, I can hear you laughing.

Some good news: we can force that blue line up by organizing for workers' rights, and we can force that red line down by contacting our local officials and telling them we want rent increase caps during and in between tenancies!

[pomegranate-flower]

[aveloka-draws]

Couldn't stop thinking about that tweet, I love the idea of a god promoting his faith.

[carsonjonesfiance]

It’s Magic Word Leftism. You say the Right Words to prove you are Correct and then you don’t have to elaborate and you don’t have to think any deeper. If someone else says The Magic Words you don’t have to question that they are telling the truth — they said The Words — so you know it’s true and spread anything they say. At this point you could publish the writing of Henry Ford and add in the right buzzwords and people who genuinely think they are helping would post it across all their platforms.

[jethroq]

hold on, let him cook

[desinteresse]

Americans making polls like:

“What’s the first thing you think of when you think of Iowa” girl nobody ever thinks about Iowa

[plant-dad-sulu]

WRONG

[anchovy]

Me in a random tag: weeeeee this is so fun!! I love looking at all the cool art and posts wow.

An 18+ untagged self insert reader fic that involves multiple kinks, is thousands of words long, and isn’t under a read more:

[kreuzaderny]

[cosmoscenti]

i wanna know who spent a once-in-a-lifetime event to take this horrifying aesthetically-pleasing picture

[brucespringsteen]

In the old days, Springsteen would, pretty frequently, give Clemons a lingering kiss right on the lips onstage, sometimes sliding all the way across the stage to meet his welcoming arms. For years, this gesture sparked cultural-studies theorizing — queer overtones, racial subversion, etc. — and lately, it’s been inspiring social media photo collages from young music fans charmed by the thought of the seemingly super-straightest of rock stars challenging the squarer elements of his audience. When I bring all this up to Springsteen, he’s as amused as he is dumbfounded. “You’re kidding,” he says. “I gotta be honest with you. I never thought about it. I can honestly tell you, I never felt self-conscious about it or gave it any thought. We were just close.”

Later, he adds: “We’re talking about one of the deepest relationships of my life. I can’t reduce it to an intellectual exercise. I can’t reduce it to a capsule sociological explanation, of 45 years of work and love between me and one of my dearest friends."

Ghosts, Guitars, and the E Street Shuffle

[gettingnutsfromsquirrels]