if anyone asks, you've never heard of me. @i-131 - Tumblr Blog

never-obsolete

Storage Wizard MacWorld - November 1997

juney-blues

stairs are so funny. falling 100 meters will kill you. solution? fall 10 centimeters a thousand times.

markadoo

they invented all those neat si prefixes and people still talk like this

395nm

falling a hectometer will kill you. solution? fall a decimeter a kilotime.

pankendev

(snaps out of it) OH MY GOD WHAT HAVE I BEEN DOING!! HOLY JESUS CHRIST FUCK WHY DID NOBODY TRY TO STOP ME (eases back into it) ahhhh. yeah this feels right

bruzum

stupidestasshole

what if it was called magic the slathering and it was about lotions and ointments

micromontage

I'm like if a

Who cares. Let's run away. I don't care anymore

chaoticneutralwife

*mumbling and grumbling* maybe i wanted to win stupid prizes *kicks dirt*

weepyemperor

Tshirt that says I'm With Holding

boymounter

just ask that person out, the worst thing they can say is an esoteric incantation that topologically inverts your body

balaclava-trismegistus

Man goes to see a doctor. Says "I'm depressed. Every morning I struggle to get out of bed. Nothing makes me feel happy anymore. I don't see the point in anything." Doctor says "whatever. Who even cares? It's not like any of this matters."

excuse-me-thanks

“i should take a walk for my mental health” boring, tired, i don’t even really wanna do it tbh

“i need to check the perimeter” i need to check the perimeter

retroactivebakeries

the principal aim of lying is to accomplish your goal in as few lies as possible, and with the least amount of effort necessary to keep those lies going. It follows naturally that the world’s greatest liar speaks only the truth.