hi hello I’m LaureL, a plant, call me grass, flower, photosynthesis, ANYTHING PLANT RELATED!!
She/her, proud Peruvian🇵🇪🇵🇪 and aroace :)
DM’s are open anytime, feel free to have a chat if we follow each other :D
I just do everything for fun, I write, draw and animate every 2 months
All my oc's have their own tags, just search for oc: [name]
Also, please, IM A MINOR, don't be weird, I don't do comms, I have a life, creeps, ai blogs, nsfw blogs or mean ppl dni. This is my safe space, treat others how you would like to be treated.
Hi there, I'm new to the g/t community, and if you could recommend a fic for me to start with
–A lurker–
Hi anon!! First, WELCOME TO THE G/T COMMUNITY YAYYY
Second, there are many stories and comics I can recommend, of course you can see if you like it or not since this is purely based on my preferences
-Trevor&Bennett comic by @ilovegt, this is one of the first ones I read when I joined the g/t community of tumblr after forgetting and refusing for 1 year. This is a slice of life comic, (in most chapters............) including amazing art, wholesome g/t ;), and good characters that are likeable and feel alive, I recommend this story really much, it gives me this homey feeling, it makes me feel relaxed just by looking and I love it (right now not, I'm feeling uneasy and desperate help)
-Another I would recommend is @sleepergent’s byler borrower au, I know NOTHING about Stranger Things but this fic is just too beautiful and amazing and LONG (i love that) this fic might get me into stranger things JAJAJS I love it mr sleepergent keep giving us masterpieces
-Other recommendations I have are A Fraction Of Justice by @ratcatcher0325, It uses the pet trope but IN THE BEST WAY, It has angst, hurt/comfort and fluff omg it’s amazing I love it, one of my main recommendations please check it out
-another story I recommend is Beyond the beanstalk by @yippeesizedifgohard It’s about the classic tale everyone knows BUT with PARENTAL G/T it’s amazing, check it out INMEDIATELY
-Finally, I shall mention 24/7 working with humans and The Moon and the Star by @collenseward, the first is already completed and it’s a fic about the son of the g/t tumblr community Kevin (WE LOVE KEVIN) and the second is still on progress and has GREAT WORLDBUILDING AND CHARACTERS
Those are all my recommendations :] go read ALL OF THEM
also sorry for tagging so many people!! Good day, afternoon and night
Who is your oc with the best design in your opinion? Who is the oc with the best lore? And who is your favorite to write?
-your dear friend pasto
UHHHHHH HOLA PASTO 🗣‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥‼️🗣‼️‼️‼️
Ejem, okey let me think about it.
♡ When it comes to design, I have a lot of characters with really beautiful designs, but I remember one in particular. It actually has a very intriguing backstory, and honestly, I should draw it again.
TW: Mentions of suicide—read at your own discretion
《Long ago, there lived a young artist who, frustrated by his lack of success and his sorrows, was drowning in problems until, suffocated by his own guilt, he decided one day to take his own life.
But he died with such rage that his soul did not leave this earthly plane, transforming into a divine creature, jealous of other artists.
They say that if you find your art sabotaged, scratched, or simply notice the next day that what you created looks terrible, it’s Ethan’s spirit haunting the paintings, jealous of others》
Gods, I drew so horrible in digital years before (No me doing a circle xddd) I have new sketches of him and he looks too much better, like the vibe I wanted to trasmit in that years
◇ Speaking of lore, Marry is one of the best-written characters. I have her past, present, future, and descendants all mapped out. She’s a character who’s been with me for a long time—almost 6 years of my life—and I’ve been developing her little by little.
The truth is, I love her so much. Forgive me, Marry, for making you suffer so much. Your death, too, was really ouch (she turned into a marble statue—ouch).
JASJJAJSHJA BRUUUUH MY OLD DRAWINGS, is her and her husband when they were younger (Their plot is simple, an invisible man and the daughter of the woman who did that to him)
♧ And my favorite to write we will always the marionette oc, and Casir. Both are characters that I create for a necessity I had and they help me a lot to cure some things I need to left behind
Old drawings of "rayita" ah... I need to give him a good ending, don't worry guys, he is a paid actor, he only does his work
And old drawings of Casir, they are amazing, they has one of my favorite stories of creation JANJSJAJA its just hilarious how I came to that. They has a very special place in my heart
these two are complicated, they say the writers work mirror the writer BUT YOU ARE WRONG, and right………it only mirrors what was my mindset in the worst time of my life, and I FEEL DUMB AND CORNY WRITING THIS
Struggled A LOT with this one as I said in the other post😓😓 girls don’t be dumb pls
CW: Suicidal ideation, my girls being stupid asf, slight cursing
Prologue<< Previous< Next>>
Word count: 2,700k
————
It all started with that thought, that silly, dumb, dangerous thought.
But it’s been bugging her for a good while. Since Sienna was 14, since the massacre happened and her parents and her managed to go to Tsavorite.
Why not go to—
NO! No…! That’s NOT a good idea at all, It’s dangerous, it’s a bad idea, no thoughts like that should appear on her head.
She just needs to stop thinking about that. Just get the thought out of her head.
Problem is that the thought hasn’t disappeared since Tuesday, It was Sunday already.
Sienna lay on her bed, looking at the ceiling while in deep thought, having an inner debate whether the idea of going back to Maedale was a good idea or not, well, of course it isn’t a good idea— It’s a death sentence even going outside Tsavorite itself. Maybe that’s a good thing…To get a taste of her own medicine…
What is she even thinking? Ugh, stupid and confusing brain. Maybe she should try to think about something else…Like Delphi coming over today…Yeah! Delphi would come over to her place today, she told her yesterday night tho. But her parents didn’t usually mind, Delphi had been her friend for 4 years and they always welcomed her here for all she has done for their daughter.
A few time later the doorbell rang, she hurried to the front door to find her mom already in the door, greeting her best friend.
“Delphi! Come inside.” Sienna’s mother greeted, making her way out for Delphi to walk in.
“Good morning Martha. How are you all doing?” She greeted back, quickly hugging with her friend’s mother, briefly making eye contact with Sienna and walking towards her.
“It’s been good! It’s nice to have you here again after a while.” She explained “How is Hailey? Oh, and Marie too…” She asked, adding the last part in a sadder tone, Delphi turned around.
“My mom’s been fine, Marie is better than before, she’s been worried about Campbell.” Sienna couldn’t see Delphi’s expression as she was behind her, but she could hear how quiet she went with that theme, and with reason. Marie’s best friend Liz went missing late last year, and it seems she may have passed away. It’s obvious Delphi would be sad over her sister’s distress.
Delphi and Sienna headed to her room, Sienna sat in her bed while Delphi slumped on the desk chair. They started talking about normal stuff, school, band, problems, etcetera…
“You still have these lying around?” Delphi asked as she picked up a few cardboard stars that were on top of her desk. Sienna remembered, she had those since she tried replicating Iv– her sister’s crafts, failing miserably. “I promised myself I’d do them someday, yet it's been almost 1 year since i’ve touched those…” Sienna explained, laying on her bed, staring at the ceiling.
“You really need to finish it eh?” Delphi suggested, putting down the small star on Sienna’s desk. “So, anything else on your mind lately?” She asked.
“Maedale.” Sienna said automatically, regretting her own words for a second, but this was Delphi. She could trust her with her thoughts.
Delphi didn’t react much, only put a face that expressed pity for her friend. Sienna was used to that type of reactions, at least Delphi listened to her and tried to give her an advice. Unlike most who just said “Oh that’s so sad…” and then nothing else.
“What exactly this time?” Delphi asked, moving the chair closer to Sienna’s bed.
Sienna stayed silent for a second, getting her thoughts in order, opening her mouth shortly after.
“I— you know, I get this thought about going to Maedale, I get this… urge, is it like an impulsive thought?” Sienna explained, fiddling with her hands in the air in the process.
Delphi hummed, nodding, probably deep in thought. Her eyes locking on her, shoot— She needed to keep explaining.
“So— This…thing…it’s there most of the time, every now and then it reappears and stuff… But, now, it’s been there bugging me since Tuesday.” Sienna finished, putting her hands on her face and grumbling, sinking more into her bed as if she could just melt away from the world.
Delphi’s eyes widened, she was surprised by this? Honestly it was a odd considering Sienna has told her way worse stuff before.
“Woah, and I thought you weren’t having never-ending-cycle-of-thoughts since 2020.” Delphi said in genuine surprise, pausing for a moment before speaking again. “You really want to go?” She asked Sienna.
"I don't know- I want to go, but it's just... I can't- I don't want to face it again." Sienna told Delphi, feeling conflicted. She felt her hand on her shoulder, already used to the gesture.
“I don’t want but I want at the same time?!” Sienna began, pulling her hair a little “I just— What if I find Ash? What if I find Rosie? What if I find Ivy?! I— How?” Sienna buried her face in her hands, she felt bad, so bad, yet, she wanted to go there. Just so she could get what she deserved, and maybe find them? But— How will she face everything?
“Wait—“ Delphi spoke up, shaking her hands in front of her. “Your friends? There? What? But they are— well, supposed to…” Delphi’s face showed a mix of confusion and disbelief.
“I don’t know?!” Sienna snapped, facing Delphi, she herself had a face of confusion and frustration. She couldn’t get her mind in order, were her thoughts positive or negative at this point? Going to Maedale was bad, but it was good? Finding Rosie and Ash would be a mix of both… No— It would be good…
It would be great? But—
“What do you really want to do? Do you want to possibly encounter your old friends or stay here forever?” Delphi intervened, her expression dead serious.
It was like a cold bucket of water being poured right on her.
Of course, of course she understood that, she wouldn’t stay forever here, she didn’t need to keep running away, she didn’t want to, she wanted to save them, she failed at that already, she wanted to re—
But how will I face Ash?
But how will I face my home?
But how will I face that scene?
“Sienna stop blanking out.” Delphi snapped her out of her trance, shaking her shoulders harshly. The girl blinked a few times, before setting her eyes on Delphi again.
“I-I want to find them…I miss them…But— I don’t want to find her. I don’t want to go to my house and find her, I wouldn’t be… able to…” Sienna’s face went blank at the mere thought of her sister’s dead corpse…The thing that always appeared at one point in her nightmares, If she already freaked out and tensed at a damn dream, how would it be in real life for the second time?
Because when her family managed to escape that massacre, managed to escape the Shifters, managed to escape death, they were letting go everything at once.
They were missing someone, missing everyone in their old town. Missing friends, neighbors, everyone. They all were left to die, all because of beasts, just because that stupid town decided to ignore the obvious sign of disaster.
The attacks and defenses from their people were useless, everyone perished, on a quick or gruesome way, depending if the monster was feeling like it would be cruel this time or not. But most of them were cruel, tearing limbs apart, striking non vital yet painful parts, slowly crushing you with those strong animalistic traits they possessed, soulless eyes watching you suffer in an endless torture.
Except for the few that survived, including her, an unfortunate soul that survived, the cost of it being haunted with that night forever, being overwhelmed by the guilt of previous decisions, stuck in the past, not able to let go of it.
But with this, wasn’t she going back to the past? To face it? To remember? Yes? No? She was only facing her fears with this, to prove herself as brave, for the first time. And also finally clear her doubts.
Because deep down, she had the hunch, that part of her that believed that they were alive, that some of them also managed to survive, and survive.
But wasn’t it illogical? Not moving from one place to another? Instead of staying in the same place…
At least if it was them, she knew they would stay, she knew her friends, she knew how they were.
…
“Alright, I’ll go…” Sienna declared, gulping down all the negative thoughts invading her mind. Delphi didn’t seem satisfied.
“You’ll go? We’ll go.” Delphi spoke up, shaking her head, Oh, she wanted to go? But— why? Delphi didn’t have anyone or anything in Maedale. She wanted to go alone, just so she could let destiny decide whether she could find her friends or not. Let fate decide for her.
But… Delphi was being nice again? And now that she was actually thinking about it, she would have way more chances to find them if she went with Delphi. At the end of the day, Delphi was one of those students who took the S.D classes really seriously, and not only that, she went to separate martial arts lessons on the weekend.
So… Maybe they can do this, no— They will do this!
“Sienna, we can do this, we can find your stuff, your friends…!” Delphi encouraged, her face showing an actual smile, her eyes lighting up. She held her hand in between both of her hands, squeezing hers a bit.
“Delph…You really want to go with me?” Sienna asked one last time to confirm.
“Yes.” Delphi said confidently, Sienna couldn’t help but feel a bit…Relieved? At peace? And weirdest of all, disappointed? Her mind was a mess.
“Ok…But how are we going to get there? Out.” Sienna asked, even if she remembered the path to Maedale and very clearly remembered how she got to Tsavorite, in that time they were lucky and someone actually was there to let them inside the city. Since everything is surrounded by metal rales, even if as always, if Shifters attacked in mass, those would be useless.
“I actually know a path,” Delphi said more quietly, Sienna couldn’t get a finger on what type of expression she was making right now but she felt a tinge of an…off face, a mix of many emotions probably. “It’s near that bakery near the border.” She explained.
“The one that sells those cakes that taste like cardboard?” Sienna guessed, not knowing exactly where was this place.
Delphi shook her head. “No, the one that sells the cheesecake.” Sienna remembered immediately where it was, that bakery sold probably the best cheesecakes, she knew how Delphi and Marie loved those, typical sisterhood, how envious she felt.
“Ok…So we are going in there, then I guide?” Sienna suggested unsure.
“Yeah? You remember it.” Delphi stated more than asking.
Delphi started typing something on her phone, probably organizing this thing. That reminded her to do the same, she should do so she can have everything ready and organized as well.
A notification from Delphi’s phone ringed, and Sienna saw as she was most likely opening it, since she slouched on her chair and glued her eyes to her phone.
“Is it Matt?” She asked.
“Nope, ‘s Marsh” Delphi mumbled, her expression turning a little frustrated, what did Marie do now?
“Fussing over shit?” Sienna asked, growing a tiny bit curious about what was going on.
“Kinda, she’s saying I owe her something from probably 2 years ago.” She complained, picking the bridge of her nose.
“Hm, good memory.” Sienna said more to herself than Delphi.
“Alright— Back to important things,” Delphi began as she properly sat up and set her phone on the desk.
“…When can we do it?” She asked. Alright, Monday is discarded, too early, Saturday too, Delph cant do it that day…
That leaves Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Sunday…For now.
“Ok, ok, Tomorrow and Saturday it’s a no, do we have something on the week?” The white haired said.
Delphi pondered for a second, tapping the armchair as she thought.
“Should we check the weather throughout the week?” She suggested. That was a good idea, Sienna proceeded to check the weather for everyday of the week.
“Ok not Thursday, it’ll rain.” Sienna informed, looking at the other days.
Friday was going to be windy…and foggy, discarded.
Sunday wasn’t even in the list, discarded I guess… She thought, the unpredictability of that was enough to discard that day.
That leaves Wednesday and Tuesday.
…
“Tuesday or Wednesday?” Delphi heard Sienna ask, getting out of the train of thought she just got, thinking about that again.
Wednesday or Tuesday?
Honestly she didn’t have a preference for that, Sienna was asking, she should probably choose.
“Hmm, Tuesday seems the best.” Tuesday, yeah! Tuesday was probably the best, Wednesday her parents would be home, and maybe they would try and get her to babysit her sister even if little-baby-Marie was 15 already.
Sienna nodded, looking at her phone intensely.
Oh fuck she was blanking out again.
She moved her hand towards Sienna’s shoulder, gripping it fiercely and shaking her.
“Oh— Sorry Del…” Don’t apologize, you shouldn’t apologize for that. Delphi thought as her friend kept apologizing, Sienna really went through hell and aback in Maedale, she just couldn’t let her go there alone, she would probably have a real bad time, panic attacks, crying, dying…
No— That wouldn’t happen, besides, going to Maedale would be the excuse to go and finally get a piece of what she deserved, or see if…
No, Shifters are merciless, Sienna already taught her that with the horrific tales of what happened in the massacre, those monsters…
How selfish of her to keep looking for a reason to redeem herself.
“Ok, we should go there when school ends, the sooner the better.” She said, her expression serious, the sooner they went there, they could have more time to go there before the sunset.
Going to Maedale was going to be her first time going outside Tsavorite, going outside for the first time in her life, she felt determined to do so. She would help Sienna, and if needed, put her life at risk for her, Sienna deserved every good thing in the universe, after all she went through, even if she was overwhelming sometimes—
No, that was last year, only last year.
“Yeah, let’s do that by now.” Sienna nodded as she spoke, probably coming up with an excuse to tell the others they wouldn’t go to band practice that day.
They would go there, and get to see Maedale.
Her for the first time, Enny for the second time in four years. It was mind blowing.
And all in two days, they should be planning everything now, to be prepared, to not miss anything and let this develop perfectly.
Perfectly as she wanted, she needed to go, she needed to do it. It was the way she could get her mind at peace after one excruciating year.
And make Sienna happy, she would help her.
Because if she’s enjoying herself and that blank stare when she first arrived in 8th grade won’t return.
Then everything’s fine.
“Ah, this is going to be a long planning day.” Sienna stretched and yawned, complaining about having to plan too much. Typical.
“We gotta plan y’know? We gotta be prepared.” She reprimanded, her expression turning harsh, Sienna couldn’t take this without seriousness.
“Y-yeah, I know.” Sienna spoke up, that’s better, that’s the spirit Sienna! She was her best friend, but she couldn’t let things like that slip, Sienna had to be good, she couldn’t let others harm her more, others making her feel miserable, or her thinking in a negative or harmful way.
I decided to write this in my first language, because I feel like i can express myself better.
La historia de [?????], alguien sin nombre, sin voluntad, y como pudo superar una situación.
CW: Relaciones tóxicas, manipulación, desprecio de uno mismo
————
¿Como terminé así?
Mi mundo es gris, mi mundo es un vacío, mi mundo no tiene ningún color.
Al menos, cuando ella no está.
Ella le da algo de color a mi vida, su presencia le da un color rojo y azul a mi vida. Cuando ella se va, el gris opaca todo mi mundo, el gris se apodera de todo lo que puedo ver, oír y sentir.
En mi hogar soy un papel arrugado, mis [monstruos] me agarran, escriben todo lo que desean en mi, para luego desecharme, ya que no pude seguir todo al pie de la letra, para luego volver y tratar de arreglarme. Nunca pudieron arreglarme, nadie pudo arreglarme.
En la [infierno] soy un lienzo, las personas pueden pintar en mi, pueden tirarme pintura, usarme como el lienzo de su odio. Y cuando terminen, van a cubrir todo en una gruesa capa de pintura blanca, para poder dejar todo como estuvo antes.
Con ella soy… algo diferente. Soy humana, soy una humana con una pobre vista y que tiene la boca tapada con una cinta que apenas la empiece a despegar, mandará un inmenso dolor a mi cabeza.
Pero es mejor que ser algo inanimado… Es mejor que ser un objeto que no es capaz de responder :)
Con ella, puedo ser feliz? Si, ¡si! Soy feliz con ella… Con ella puedo hablar de lo que le gusta, de lo que ella piensa, de lo que le pasa an ella, y yo, debo escuchar todo, es divertido. Cada cierto tiempo debo opinar, pero con cuidado, ya que ella es una escultura frágil, y no quiero romper esta obra de arte. Ella se ve a si como una basura, pero yo sé que no lo es, yo no veo nada feo, no veo nada que pueda ser repugnante, solo veo una persona de buen corazón, porque yo tengo su corazón, ella misma me lo entregó. Porque mi tarea, es cuidar su corazón, su pobre corazón…Tan roto, tan frágil, mi tarea es cuidarla del mundo cruel que nos rodea, de las serpientes, de las sombras, de todo.
Porque si dejo que su corazón se rompa, mi mundo volverá a ser gris.
Amaneció
…
En el [??????] soy encadenada, no tengo derecho a moverme, ya que las serpientes me observan, nos observan y sisean entre sí, esparciendo su veneno entre colmillos, dejando que este se esparza por todo el lugar.
Ella me mantiene al margen, debo seguir cuidando su corazón, por algo sigo cuidándolo, y como lo rompí esa horrenda tarde, fui encadenada a su muñeca, mi cuello es pesado, al menos estas cadenas pueden cubrir sus imperfecciones, pueden cubrir las marcas de mis manos, sus manos, sus manos.
Mis lentes están rotos, no puedo ver nada, ella es mi única guía, ella es mi visión, porque confío en ella, yo sé que ella no me va a dejar.
“[?????], ayer me pasó de lo peor.” Su voz me despertó, presté atención a sus palabras.
“Ayer mi [monstruo] me gritó, agarró mi corazón y le clavó un papel con palabras tan horrendas, no sé qué hacer, ahora le estoy hablando a [persona decente :)]” Ella terminó de explicar, su cara de porcelana tornándose a su expresión de tristeza, lágrimas carmesí cayendo de una de las mitades de esa cara.
Creo que tengo permiso para poder hablar.
Y tenía razón, en un segundo su mano arrancó con fuerza la cinta que cubría mi boca, respire por un segundo, antes de hablar.
“Ay, tú [monstruo] realmente es alguien horrible, ¿como puede hacer eso? A veces me hace acordar a mi propio [monstruo??] Ya te dije como es, es medio complicado…” Mis ojos se dirigieron a su cara, analizando su expresión, creo que hablé mucho sobre mi misma, a juzgar por su expresión, desvié el tema a mí misma, no voy a descuidar su corazón.
No debo descuidar su corazón.
“Estás muy callada, di algo.” Ella ordenó, la mano que estaba atada a la cadena se movió bruscamente, moviéndome más cerca a ella, su mano tocó la mía, agarrándome con fuerza, sentía púas en mi piel, lentamente derramando el líquido rubí de mis venas.
Y no pude hablar, porque no sé cómo responder, no sé qué decir, así que en vez de arruinar la situación al decir cualquier estupidez, me quedé callada.
Al recibir un silencio ella me soltó, me soltó bruscamente y clavó un papel en mi cabeza que describía perfectamente lo que era, un demonio, un ser tan horrendamente despiadado, porque yo no soy nada más que eso, porque yo fui la que descuidó su corazón.
Y al final, ella se fue, se fue, se fue, por mi culpa.
Mi mundo fue gris de nuevo, sentí unas lágrimas caer por mis mejillas, sin ella, mi mundo es totalmente gris. Y no puedo ir con los demás, no, ellos no me entienden tan bien como ella… Y tampoco puedo abrir mi propio corazón a nadie más que a ella, estamos rodeadas de serpientes, y aunque las serpientes esparzan su veneno alrededor de nosotros cuatro, ellos dos también pueden serlo… Aunque no quieran serlo, de todas maneras, [<3?] descuido el corazón de ella, no puedo confiar tanto en ella…
Aunque quiera volver confiar en ella, en todos.
¿Que estoy diciendo? Con estos pensamientos voy a volver a descuidar su corazón…
Quedé sentada en un rincón, abrazándome a mí misma mientras mi mente se podría por dentro.
Atardeció
…
Es extraño.
Sé que algo está mal, sé que algo está muy mal conmigo.
Mi mundo no recuperó color.
Ahora solo es gris.
Vivo para ella, vivo para consolarla, vivo para poder hablar tranquilamente con ella, y aún así, mi mundo no recupera su color. Soy encadenada, no puedo moverme, no puedo hacer nada.
Juro que ella ha cambiado y no es la misma que hace 2 años, de verdad, en ese tiempo solo era algo mala, pero ahora, gracias a charlas ha mejorado!??
…
…
…
Desde que recibí la noticia de mis [monstruos? No? No se.] de que mi infierno cesaría, me sentí… Feliz? No se porque, pero definitivamente me siento nerviosa, nuevas serpientes, nuevas sombras, es horrendo tener que abrir la boca solo para arruinar todo.
Pero… No tenía opción, es más, ella también se iría, por más que me doliera, por más que quisiera que ella vaya conmigo, el mundo no lo permitiría.
Y aún así, aunque ya se acercaba el momento, las serpientes seguían siseando, que horrendo, los odio, los odio a todos.
Pero… Nunca más los voy a ver, no tendré que pensar en ellos, podré ser libre! …De ellos.
Y así, mire por última vez al infierno, y la abrace a ella por última vez.
“Te extrañaré.” Grité en alegría, abrazando fuerte su frágil cuerpo, no tan fuerte para romperlo, pero lo suficientemente fuerte para expresar mi gratitud a todo lo que ella hizo por mí.
“Te extrañaré muchísimo, te amo [?????].” Ella dijo con una inmensa tristeza, perlas cayendo de sus ojos, ella hundió su cabeza en mi hombro, abrazándome demasiado fuerte, pero esta vez no me molestó.
Pero algo raro es que yo no llore.
Salí de ese lugar en el que tanto sufría por mis compañeros, salí, y por alguna razón,
Mi mundo recuperó color.
Anocheció
…
Ahora, estoy en otro ambiente, ahora, tengo que empezar de nuevo, tengo que agarrar el valor, tengo que actuar normalmente para que las serpientes de este lugar no fijen sus ojos en mi.
Este lugar es pacífico, no es tan ruidoso, es bonito.
:)
Ahora he hecho algunos amigos, y la he pasado muy bien, mi mundo ya no es tan gris, el lugar que llame infierno es donde hay más color ahora, en mi hogar sigue siendo algo gris, pero igual.
¡Creo que he mejorado!
Es más, aún me sigo hablando con ella! Estamos hablando de lo que pasa en su entorno, realmente no sé si ha mejorado, pero le deseo suerte.
…
…
Creo que no.
Otra vez volvió el gris, porque volví a arruinar todo, absolutamente todo, porque volví a descuidar su corazón… O no? Espera, no, NO!
Esta vez…
Algo está pasando, es EL DÍA en que enlazamos, el día en que nos encadenamos, el día en que mi cuello no fue libre y su mano tampoco.
Pero, no está ahí, no está ahí para celebrar, no está ahí para reír, solo un mísero nada, una ola de mensajes revisados, pero ninguno respondido.
Acaso… Pasa algo?
Por primera vez, sentí esa cadena algo floja.
Por primera vez, la pesada bola atada a mi pierna no fue tan pesada.
Por primera vez, ese papel clavado a mi cabeza cayó al piso.
“Voy a hablar con [:D].” Fui decidida, con la tercera de nuestro grupo, que realmente solo estaba ahí de adorno, y si…Tengo que pensar todo de nuevo?
Amaneció, el sol iluminando lo que fue un lindo día.
…
Soy libre :)
Porque todo este tiempo, ella fue lo que hizo gris mi mundo.
Aunque igual siempre vaya a atormentar mi mente y sea una de esas razones por las que mi tengo la mente podrida, ahora, en el presente, soy realmente feliz, más feliz de lo que pude ser ahí.
I’m GENUINELY STRUGGLING to write chap 3 because of this one everything on tbts HAPPENS, problem is that im too attached to the original idea i had in 2024 at least for this specific event that probably changes everything else.
The thing is that it’s so stupidly unbelievable, it’s DUMB and Sienna and Delphi sound dumb asf I hate it. But I have no other idea of how things could develop unless this stupid move is made, I sure gave a lot more “depth” to it now but still, I’m very confused and frustrated over it :/
Ok I’ve been reflecting a bit rn and MAYBE I have an excuse for it, spoiler, Sienna thinks it’s a thing she deserves and has the need to do, and Delphi thinks it’s something she deserves and needs to do, BUT even if it’s the same goal and thought, It’s derived from totally different reasons
anyway, this post helped me motivate myself into finishing writing :)
Something like a pattern and color of a friendship bracelet? Its pretty inconspicuous and also easily identifiable, and its somethings thats easy and accessible for most people to make.
True true. There are those letter beads too but that might be too obvious and might cause people to ask questions
Perhaps it could be a bracelet or even a necklace with the two different sized beads and like a tea leaf pendant (or any leaf really) cause then it’d be a pun G/tea. That and leaves have lots to do with g/t at least on the smaller side of things lol
All the ideas everyone’s been suggesting are AMAZINGGG, I want to combine many of those, like if we could represent ourselves with objects related to g/t! I’ll make a drawing about all those ideas now >:)
let’s ignore the fact that I forgot about this for 2 months cause I have 1 billion projects at once.
so… one thing, thanks to @a-chaotically-small-lunta post (that is above in the reblogs) suggesting the name “G/tea” I got an idea, one that I’ve been using for 2 months…
I started calling g/t green tea😭😭
@collenseward and @cataultimatecetacean can confirm this, in fact, they also started calling it that in public, and sometimes just because it sounds cool, ITS TOO DEEP NOW, I DONT EVEN LIKE GREEN TEA (the drink) THE IDEA JUST POPPED UP IN MY HEADDDDDDD I USE IT EVERYDAY NOWWWWWW
My idea now it’s just a beaded bracelet, big beads alternating with small beads, different colors and everything, and elements associated with fairies, borrowers, nature, etc, all with the text “GREEN/TEA” :]
if it isn’t a bracelet, it could be a keychain, with the things mentioned earlier, THE HOOK THE HOOKKKKKK, that could be really easily identifiableeeee (again, more ideas please :3)
Which of your OCs do you consider the most morally questionable, and why?
hola playaso🗣️🔥🔥
GOOD QUESTIONS…..I have many MANY morally questionable ocs, but the ones I could consider the most morally questionable are these
(I’ve rewritten everything 2 times because tumblr decided to crash when I wanted to save my progress i hate it.)
oc yap incoming….
When we are talking about THE SHIFTERS… (you’ll see them later in TBTS soon I SWEAR) most of them are morally grey, don’t get me wrong, many are good👍👍 but the interesting ones are morally grey, but other good bunch is not that good.
I can just talk of a few cause I know I will spill stuff on accident and I want EVERYONE TO WAIT *evil laughter*
Nymphia Nymphia Nymphia, I think everyone that looked at my blog knows her, the dear protagonist of the Butcher Vanity amv that took me 149 days. Anyway, the FACT that Butcher Vanity is her song kinda speaks for itself, cus y’know, eating humans and also Shifters, SO CANNIBALISM AND MURDER, yeh
but that isn’t the whole character, she’s fun and everything and kind of crazy, like insane. My girl RAMBLES about human eating like a damn food reviewer.
If we have to talk about any kind of morals she might have, she convinced and forced herself that she has no morals left, she pushed those away a long ago. She has no empathy or mercy left for anyone, she lives only to eat, be judged, be feared and have some sort of fun. Ignoring everyone’s opinions, because if she doesn’t, she’ll just dwell and her past self will come back, the one who became a sinner of the Bachelor tribe.
If Nymphia has something near some value or morality left, It could be her odd sense of justice, which I don’t think it can be considered a sense of justice at all. This only applies to those who piss her off (which trust me, it’s hard, girl sees funsies in everything.) by doing something “wrong” in the Shifter’s values, or more specifically, her tribe’s. This sense of justice fluctuates depending on how she’s feeling at the moment, it’s very unstable and inconsistent and that’s a reason I hardly consider it that. One exception or so is Azula, one that is so similar yet so different from her. She constantly wishes something bad or tragic to happen to her, since Azula is stronger than her and can’t do anything aw man :(
Still, Nymphia is a bit isolated from everyone else in a emotional way, since, mostly everyone fears or is wary of her, humans for obvious reasons, but Shifters too, since even if they themselves kill humans, eating them is seen as weird and creepy, and even worse in her tribe, which even human killing was seen as a reason to be banished (which she was), so even worse if she ATE them. The human killing thing did change since a CERTAIN event happened (oops spoilers)
If we move onto the HUMANS, I have SO MUCH MORE QUESTIONABLE GUYS, I have trouble deciding who I should talk about cus I consider them more morally grey than anything.
This woman is questionable, just look at her, I don’t trust her, Genesis is part of the 4th part of my story, so I can’t talk much about her, along with Sawyer, who will appear in a video I’m working on rn. (ITS 60% OK I hate animating)
The only I can say about Gen is that she also has some sense of justice, but unlike Nymphia’s, hers is a lot more solid and established, but this makes her really harsh since there are NO exceptions. Her ways of applying this justice are particularly aggressive. I also think she’s kind of against the everyone, since S.E.A = bad Shifters = bad SO EVERYONE IS BAD!??
I’ll talk about the S.E.A someday…When I finish and sort out how I will introduce the 4th part of the story.
Sawyer and Genesis are both connected in the story at some point, yep
The only thing I can say is that Sawyer is a soldier, and at this point it’s obvious Genesis a vigilante.
At the end of the day I think everyone is morally questionable in a way (except my cutie pie Liz, protect her at all costs). If I flip the Human perspective to Shifters and Shifter to humans everyone will be the bad guy in the others side. What I have considered what defines if someone is “morally questionable” or not are actions and mindset, but not biased by the values of each side, more of a, mix of both. Even if this post is a bit more of Humans side of things, since I don’t want to spoil anything.
HOLY YAP ANYWAY THANKS DEAR COLLAGEN THANK YOU FOR SENDING ME AN ASK ILY pls guys send more asks i want to unleash the lore monster🙏🙏
my friends have been bullying me by constantly saying “Open the window” and I’m suffering I’ll patiently wait for the next chapter to either suffer more or recover
Chapter 19 is truly the worst, they both die in it.
hi hello I’m LaureL, a plant, call me grass, flower, photosynthesis, ANYTHING PLANT RELATED!!
She/her, proud Peruvian🇵🇪🇵🇪 and aroace :)
DM’s are open anytime, feel free to have a chat if we follow each other :D
I just do everything for fun, I write, draw and animate every 2 months
All my oc's have their own tags, just search for oc: name
Also, please, IM A MINOR, don't be weird, I don't do comms, I have a life, creeps, ai blogs, nsfw blogs or mean ppl dni. This is my safe space, treat others how you would like to be treated.
I cooked some art yeyyy, I’m proud of this one, It STRESSED ME SO MUCH, I tried the breakcore art style and lost it when i needed to color, but turns out I just need many overlays for it to look good :3
ANYWAY ERIS ART YAYYYY, fun fact @cataultimatecetacean and I call her “moñito” or “little ribbon” because oh surprises SHES THE RIBBON IN THE BUTCHER VANITY AMV!!!!
I’m using this as my pfp hehehehe
(Version without many effects)
THIS woman I love her sm but can’t talk too much abt her cus she’s important and will be mentioned and appear in later chapters of my story
guys this is a call for all of you to send me asks, I NEED ASKS I WILL ANSWER (just no spam or any harmful messages!!!) anyway good afternoon, good morning, good evening
Hoy nos reunimos peruanos, hoy bailamos, hoy celebramos, porque hace 205 años, el 28 de julio de 1821 se declaró la Independencia de nuestro país, después de innumerables batallas, de gente que quería a su país libre, libre del virreinato español, y lo lograron.
Ahora, celebramos, celebramos nuestra patria, celebramos nuestra hermosa cultura. Aunque nuestro país se haya vuelto una burla para los ignorantes que solo ven lo superficial, nosotros celebramos nuestro país. Esos ignorantes no ven nuestra diversa cultura, nuestra riqueza gastronómica, nuestros carnavales, nuestra historia, todo.
La gente se burla de nuestra apariencia, la gente se burla de nuestras calles, se burla de nuestra cultura, y nosotros no debemos escuchar ¡Debemos estar orgullosos de nuestras raíces! ¡De nuestro país! ¡De nosotros mismos!
Yo soy peruana y estoy orgullosa de ello, abrazo mi bella cultura, así que todos gritemos en unión: “¡Viva la patria! ¡Viva la libertad! ¡Viva la independencia! ¡VIVA EL PERÚ!"
…
Para celebrar este día, he dibujado el traje de una de las tantas danzas típicas de mi país, la Contradanza. Estoy segura que al menos el 90% de los peruanos que leen esto la han bailado en el colegio, yo incluida. Es una danza tan hermosa, con una música que puedo escuchar por horas y unos pasos que animan a cualquiera.
Hoy nos vestimos de rojo y blanco para celebrar quw hace 205 años fuimos liberados del virreinato español, que ahora tenemos una gran cultura de años de historia, años de lucha, años de estar presionados.
(Today we’re wearing red and white to celebrate the fact that 205 years ago we were liberated from Spanish rule, and that we now have a rich culture shaped by years of history, years of struggle, and years of oppression.)
Y ahora, después de tanto tiempo, nosotros como peruanos deberíamos abrazar nuestra cultura, nuestras raíces latinas ¿Por que avergonzarnos? ¿Por que sucumbir a la xenofobia de Internet? ¿Por que estar apresados?
Los malos comentarios que hemos oído, insultando nuestra belleza, nuestras virtudes, nuestras calles. Nosotros, peruanos, no somos "feos" como nos hagan creer, somos gente luchadora, que ha tenido la valentía de alzar la voz durante tantos años.
Somos un país con mucha riqueza gastronómica, con una gente tan atenta, con los andes fríos, las playas cálidas y la selva que siempre nos anima
(And now, after all this time, we as Peruvians should embrace our culture, our Latin roots. Why be ashamed? Why give in to online xenophobia? Why let ourselves be held captive?
The hurtful comments we’ve heard, insulting our beauty, our virtues, our streets. We Peruvians aren’t “ugly” as they’d have us believe; we’re a resilient people who’ve had the courage to speak out for so many years.
We’re a country with a rich culinary heritage, with such warm and welcoming people, with the cool Andes, the warm beaches, and the jungle that always lifts our spirits.)
Estoy muy orgulloso de ser peruano, estoy orgulloso de mi cultura, así que, por mi patria y que todo vaya para mejor ¡Viva la patria! ¡Viva la libertad! ¡Viva la independencia del Perú!
(I am very proud to be Peruvian; I am proud of my culture. So, for my country and for everything to get better: Long live the homeland! Long live freedom! Long live Peru’s independence! )
¡Kawsachun Perú!
JAJSJAJJSJAJA MOVING ON TO THIS DRAWING—those little llamas-shaped keychains are a beautiful memory from my childhood. I have family in the mountains and I travel there often, and it was a little souvenir I used to buy all the time
I LOVE THEM JAKSJJAJSJAJJAJA SO CUTE, CUTIES
P.S: YOU REALLY CAN TELL IDK HOW TO DRAW ANIMALS XDDDDDD
I like this one, it starts a bit panicky but chills at the middle, then fucks up again in the end
CW: a bit of swearing, a bit of suicidal thoughts
Prologue<< Previous< Next>>
Word count: 3k-ish
———
6:20 a.m
A new day, great. Sienna stirred after having a particularly comfortable sleep, it had been a slightly cold night, now her bed felt like heaven…How much she wishes she wouldn’t wake up and enjoy this sleep forever.
What to wear… Sienna thought, yesterday she wore a off shoulder top and jeans, but today she was feeling more like boots…She would like to wear a skirt maybe, but no— Not after what happened last year, no way. No more making herself look dumb!
At the end she wore shorts with a long sleeved shirt, that looked decent, she only needed to brush her hair and put on all her hair clips on.
After finally ending her preparations, she ate a toast with marmalade, brushed her teeth, and she was finally ready. Another day.
Another day…
Sienna walked silently to school, trying to remember if she had any homework or anything else, ignoring the fact that today was Tuesday.
And that meant, a whole hour and thirty minutes of P.E, more specifically, Shifter Defense this day. She hates those classes, they are useful but— It’s the worst to have a constant reminder of Maedale and her friends, and her, and Shifters, for almost 2 hours straight…
This time when she arrived Delphi, Sebastian and Fleur were already there. She greeted all of them and sat on the floor next to Delphi, leaning on the chair next to her best friend’s seat. It was a nice distraction chatting with her friends before hell started.
“Seriously, who decided to put S.D on whole first period?” Sebastian complained in the middle of the conversation.
“I dunno, the coach herself probably.” Delphi guessed, slumping on her seat while listening to the others. The coach was really intense sometimes, and Fleur told them the year prior that a senior told her how strict she was on them, and to prepare for it.
A few more minutes passed and students arrived, along with Ms. Brown, who as the bell rang indicating it was already 8 o’clock and classes were about to start. The coach started noting every late student out loud as usual, she did it when Sienna first arrived to this school, and apparently she has been doing that since forever.
“Graham, you’re late.” Ms. Brown remarked with an annoyed tone, Matthew standing in the door waiting to have permission to enter the classroom, staring at the teacher with a tired look.
“This better be the last time or I’ll start notifying your parents.” Matthew didn’t even react, and to be honest? No one did, at least with this teacher, she always threatened to do this and that but never did anything. The problem was probably her way of teaching, Sienna was scared of her, she was always snappy and all.
After a quick ramble about “the class purpose”, everyone left the classroom to head towards the Shifter Defense room, a specific room made for those classes.
Everyone got settled, the assignment was to “shoot” the dummy a few times, easy, for most people.
Oh god, how horrible. It never got old, it simply couldn’t.
Her hands shook as she held the fake gun and pointed at it towards the dummy, pulling the trigger and failing. The teacher eyed her, going closer to her.
“Lockwood! Focus.” The teacher scolded, she was pretty strict and Sienna knew it, which only added more pressure to this class. For obvious reasons she also was pretty harsh on her, out of worry? No idea, but being a survivor of a damn massacre wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows.
“Aim seriously.”
I am trying to.
She tried aiming at the dummy, but her hands wouldn’t stop shaking, making her shoot anywhere but the target.
“Think of it as a Shifter!”
I am
Again, she failed, in fact, now that she was starting to think of it more and more as a Shifter, her shaking got even worse, her legs joining along with a numb feeling in her body in general, her heart was pounding. A distorted figure replaced the dummy, a tiger with limbs way to long and eyes devoid of life, staring right into her.
“Lockwood!” She called out again, snapping her fingers next to her, Sienna snapped out of it and tried shooting again, failing, but not so far from the goal actually.
And again, the figure of a harmless dummy slowly turned into a monster, a human like creature with animalistic features, claws that could pierce her skin easily, a grin with several sharp teeth showing, a hunched back posture as if it was ready to pounce—
She was helped like someone would do with a 10 year old, who barely knows how to aim. C’mon, aim correctly—!! She remembered the breathing exercise her therapist taught her, deep breath… In… 1, 2, 3… Out. Damn, sometimes she just forgot about this, it’s so easy to get caught up on oneself’s mind.
Sienna was helped for about what felt like an eternity, the coach helping her aim correctly, managing to get it by the fourth time. After getting it twice in a row, the teacher left, still eyeing Sienna with that sharp look and finally left to inspect the other students.
About 20 minutes passed and the assignment changed, now the dummy moved. With many effort and deep breaths, she got it in a few tries, can’t say the same about the next phase.
Sienna had to “stab” the dummy, which to her, was worse than the previous exercise, she couldn’t help but start thinking about Shifters and how they— It’s bad.
But she would do anything for the teacher not scolding her again.
In the 6th try she managed to get and strike the mannequin’s head, the target. She felt satisfaction, that thing was moving real fast… A few more exercises later, she was doing things “decently”, just above failure. And according to the clock, there were only 7 minutes left until recess.
…
Time passed incredibly fast. The school day was over in a blink, damn S.D and coach Brown… Ruining the day.
Again, band practice really went fast huh? Practicing the same melody over and over again, playing it decently as usual. Why did she keep thinking about that? Why was the past still replaying every day? No matter how hard she tried, how she wanted to focus on the present, on what she has now, how she evolved as a person, yet, the panic, the nostalgia, the guilt, still haunted her mind. How she wished to go back in time, change everything, save her— No, save them all.
”Alright guys, I think we already mastered this one, anyone has a suggestion?” Sebastian’s loud voice interrupted her inner turmoil, her eyes focusing back on what was happening.
“Eh, I’m running low on ideas right now, all I can think of is…“ Matthew began, and stopped as soon as he glanced at Delphi’s face, her sky blue eyes saying the words for her. “Aight, I’ll keep my mouth shut.” He concluded, zipping his mouth shut.
Sienna felt a tap on her shoulder, almost flinching, but she already knew who was behind her. “Hey, you’ve been kinda down today.—“ Delphi said, worried as always, god— How could she see through her so easily? “—Having trouble again?”
“Yeah.” She replied, fiddling with her necklace. “I just- You know the deal, I can’t keep it out of my mind.” She paused, trying to get her thoughts clear, the old days, oh the good days, when her life was great, but, isnt it great now?
Delphi's arm wrapped around her back, bringing her closer, as some sort of comfort. Sienna felt okay with that, sorta, sometimes it was uncomfortable, but Delphi was always looking out for her.
Band practice was over and this time Sienna would head home with Delphi, who was quiet for a good while, only responding to their bandmates on a few occasions.
They walked for a few blocks together, silent the whole time. Sienna’s brain was going crazy just with the silence, did she do something wrong? Was she being too dramatic? Was Delphi tired of her rambles about the massacre? It must be—
“Wanna go to the mall?” Delphi suddenly spoke up.
Huh? Oh, well she was being dramatic for overthinking that.
“Ah— Yeah, yeah, of course.” Sienna answered, nodding a bit, diverting her gaze to the ground.
Delphi was so nice… She often thought she didn’t deserve someone like that, someone that practically saved her when she first arrived Tsavorite and her classmates where making fun of her in 2019. She felt real bad back then, and those idiots saw how she was so sensible and pathetic and took advantage of that— Ahh, Delphi you are so nice.
…
The duo practically spent all afternoon in the mall, looking between stores, Delphi bought a few things for Sienna, oh god she might again feel overwhelmed with all this kindness from her, seriously, how did she even deserve all that? It was all so beautiful, except a few things that really didn’t suit her style such as a golden necklace, she really didn’t… use another necklaces aside from the moon necklace from… um, her sister.
But either way, she would maybe find a way to use it, Delphi was spending so much on her and she would be grateful. They eventually reached another accessories store, walking in and starting to look for a something interesting, Sienna could’ve looked for something to gift Delphi, but this shop didn’t really suit her style, at all.
“Hey, look at this.” Delphi spoke up, shuffling closer to Sienna, showing her a pair of earrings, they were big and a bit weird, the hearts on it were purple and Sienna had a feeling that if someone wore them it would look like as if they were showing off. “Oh, yeah it’s so—“
“It would suit you.” Sienna was interrupted by Delphi as she held the earrings near her. Did those really suit her?
“O-Oh, you think so?” Sienna questioned awkwardly, and becoming even more confused when Delphi nodded, a faint smile on her face.
“Uh, I don’t think so…Maybe I’ll buy something else—“ Sienna tried to intervene, but she was interrupted again. “C’mon it would really suit you, my treat.” Delphi let no room for discussion as she headed to pay for the gift. Oh wow, she’s just worrying for her again. She has to be grateful.
The silver haired returned shortly, holding the now bought pair of earrings and giving them to Sienna. “Here you go, Enny.” Sienna was already saying thank you but cut off as she heard how Delphi called her.
Enny.
“Uhh, Delphi…Y-you really have to…call me that??” Sienna stuttered, fiddling a bit with the earrings she was given. Delphi tilted her head, a frown almost appearing on her face. “Can’t I call you that?” Oh shit, she’s fucking things up again.
“Ah- Well, y’know Iv- she called me that way… So…” She was getting way more nervous now, beginning to reach for her moon necklace instead of the earrings, she dreaded seeing Delphi’s expression.
“I don’t see any issue. Why can’t I?” Delphi responded, her tone going more defensive now. Oh no no no no no no….!
”Um— Wait no-! I…You can call me Enny if you want…” She gone quiet after saying that, hoping to see Delphi’s frown disappear. Thankfully, It worked.
The girls walked inside the mall for a few minutes more, chatting normally, talking about the band and a few other music-related things. Sienna checked her clock and her eyes widened at the time, It was already 7:30 p.m, she really needed to go or she would be grounded again.
“Oh damn it, girl, I need to go now.” Sienna spoke with a rushed tone, looking at Delphi with pleading eyes. Her best friend eyes widened, coming closer to her. “What? We didn’t even eat anything?” Delphi said.
“Ahh, my parents are gonna ground me, I’m so so sooo sorry!” Sienna was practically begging Delphi wouldn’t react badly, she could tell how she was acting now. It was one of those bad days again?
“Girl fuck your patents, at least stay a little longer.” Delphi insisted, grabbing her arm. Sienna was unsure, yeah, she did want to stay longer, she did want that coffee… But it’s kinda late.
With no response, Delphi stopped grabbing her. The look on her face being a mix of annoyance (please at her parents not her) and a bit of understanding.
“Sigh…Ok, leave, we can do this other time.” She said, waving her goodbyes at Sienna (and giving her the stuff she bought for her) and going separate ways. Sienna walked alone home, it was already the evening. Oh her parents would interrogate her, but, yeah, they worry for her, that’s good.
She checked her phone, nervous of seeing a reprimand on her last texts. There were 5 texts from her mother, oh god, please don’t be harsh.
“Your father and I are going to a meeting of his we aren’t coming back until 8… Oh.” She read out loud, feeling relieved and lucky, well that was convenient. She walked home in a hurry, it was already more than 7:30, she needed to arrive quickly.
7:41 p.m
Well she arrived pretty quickly… Now her legs hurt so much. After leaving her things on the bedroom beside her bed and the tiny bags with a few accessories in her desk, Sienna sat on her desk chair, grabbing her diary, felt like venting a bit today… It was a tiring day after all.
As always, she looked through some of the entries she’s made…Not all, she will feel worse if she looks through 2019 and 2020. She found a few from last year.
“I hate how they still look at me with that face, I hate how they think I’m a sensitive baby, I hate how they are talking behind my back and think I don’t notice, yet I can’t even say it to their faces. I wish I was as strong as Delphi, I wish I was as pretty as all them, I wish I could be brave, I wish I could go back and fix everything by—,,
(2022/9/29)
She couldn’t read more, It would be worse if she did, the next page would be more chill?
“I want to go I want to go I want to go there I want to go back to Mae—,,
(2023/1/31)
Oh my god why is everything wanting to remind her of all the bad things? Why is she choosing to read her diary out of all things to feel better?
“Today was not a good day,,
What a start, she flipped the page.
“I hate my classmates, I hate everyone—,,
Please not know…
“I hate how—,,
No need for other reminders—
“Today was good...,, FINALLY! Something decent. She kept reading.
“…We had a field trip to the museum, it was fun and all, I saw many statues, paintings, and things, not really interested in all the talk about it but it was good to look at.,, Huh, that’s cool.
“Tho I think I made Delphi angry, I opened my mouth when I didn’t have to, I feel so fucking horrible because of that, I don’t want my day to be ruined, but as always I deserve it for being wrong all the damn time. I want to die I want to apologize but I don’t know how what do I do omg i don’t know anything.,,
(2021/6/19)
Well that wasn’t really good. She was so messed up huh? By reading this a few locked up memories came back, she remembers that day… It then caused a big fight, tears… Yelling… Delphi punched Fleur… Delphi kicked Sienna… They stopped talking for a day or so… Fights…
Why does that sound messed up?
Nonetheless, at least Delphi is better now, after that their friendship was a lot better. Both she and Delphi learned from her mistakes and not many fights have happened since then. That’s good.
…
It was already 9 o’ clock and her parents weren’t back.
Hopefully they are just having fun, or stuck, nothing bad, not any issue. Nothing to be paranoid about.
Ok seriously, she’s worrying now, please just be stuck, please just be having a particularly long dinner… No Shifter incidents or she will move out right this second… Her parents won’t end up like Tom… Huh.
She hasn’t thought about that situation, the death of Tom Jameson was the thing that was probably the only warning of a massacre in Maedale… She remembers how Roseanne was affected by it… Her father died after all.
She wishes she hadn’t just taken it as a mere worry, it was a sign, before tragedy happened. And that tragedy is what has ruined her. It took many lives, her sister’s, her…friends?
Or no? What if…
What the fuck is she even thinking about? No bad ideas, no impulsive desires, just stay here, safe.
Her parents are fine… Nothings bad…
As if destiny was answering her worries her phone buzzed, a notification popping up, her mother’s contact on it.
“We’ll be a little late, don’t try making a homemade recipe in the microwave.”
