Castiel Derangement Hot Zone

Laura | 30s | they/he/she | U.S. | writer | AO3 I have never had a heterosexual thought in my life and my toxic trait is that I like the show I'm in a fandom for. Icon by X

[ilarual]

wake up new pinned post just dropped

⬆ ⬆ ⬆ my old pinned post was too nostalgic to be left out ⬆ ⬆ ⬆

IF TUMBLR DIES YOU CAN FIND ME ON DISCORD (for chatting), AO3 (for fic), OR DREAMWIDTH (for meta and blog-style content). MY USERNAME ACROSS ALL PLATFORMS IS ILARUAL

( more specific details and direct links in this post )

About

This is, broadly, a multifandom and personal blog, but 90% of the content you're gonna get here is Supernatural. Yeah. I didn't expect that either but after going on three years I've just accepted that this is my life now.

Generally show-positive and actor-positive. Neither the show nor the people who produced it are without flaws and I will happily have a ponder on issues of racism, misogyny, etc. when the mood strikes. However I am here because I like the show and want to celebrate the things that I like about it because fandom is a fun hobby for me.

Officially I am a Cas fan first and a human second because I see him and my brain turns into a gibbering pile of mush in a way it simply does not with other characters. Unofficially so many people having bad faith takes on Dean and dunking on him in really classist, shitty, deeply unwarranted ways caused me to become extremely protective of him and love him almost as much as I do Cas because I spent so much time trying to take him apart to see how he works.

Basically what I'm saying is that this is a pro-Destiel blog and I think both Cas and Dean are loving, well-intentioned people with a lot of baggage and issues who sometimes hurt each other and both contribute to that pretty much equally but who both, ultimately, are capable of growth, healing, and being their best selves with and for each other.

Related to the above, calling Dean or Cas abusive will get you blocked <3

Rowena is love. Rowena is life. I don't blog about her nearly as much as I think about her.

I'm not interested in policing anyone else's fandom engagement (or media consumption in general) and that includes not shaming people for enjoying things I personally find objectionable, whether that's ships, fanfic, or entire source texts. That's their business, not mine. If I don't want to interact with someone, I block or softblock and move on with my life.

Related to the above, Sastiel squicks the hell out of me. I do not want to hear about it, I do not want to talk about it, I want people to be able to enjoy what they like but I would like them to do it far the hell away from me in this specific case.

Lastly, I'm one whole grown adult. Not a young adult, an adult-adult with a mortgage and everything. I do not have an MDNI policy bc I think teenagers who are old enough to be online unsupervised are also old enough to decide for themselves if they want to follow or not. (I also don't interact one on one with people via DMs on tumblr very much, as I use tumblr as a blogging platform rather than a social media platform.) However, if you feel compelled to DM me for whatever reason and happen to be a young person, please indicate in some way that you are in fact not an adult because my socially oblivious ass will just sort of assume everyone around me is also in the 20-40 range unless told otherwise.

Navigation

Writing: all fanfiction, original fiction, and poetry I've written (tbh it's 99.9% fanfic). A direct link to my AO3 can be found in my bio at the top of the blog.

Meta posts: either my original posts or posts to which I've added substantial additional commentary

Bi Dean: what it says on the tin, posts that are evidentiary of Dean's queerness, a mix of original and reblogged content.

2023 SPN rewatch: liveblogging and analysis posts generated by my ongoing rewatch. [currently on season 12]

End of the Book podcast: Hey, I write for that! EOTBpod started as a reaction and analysis podcast for The Winchesters, and is being reorganized as a general analysis podcast for Supernatural, The Winchesters, and any other projects in the SPN universe that may come down the pipeline. [Currently on hiatus out of respect for the WGA and SAG-AFTRA strikes as we have creatives on the show who are currently members or may be future members of both unions and we're not trying to cross picket lines here]

further tags and links TBA as I think of it or as they become relevant

[pikestaff]

"Stop saying 15 year olds with weird interests are cringe, they're 15" this is true however you should also stop saying adults with weird interests are cringe because who gives a shit

[themythicalcodfish]

To wit:

[switchelsweets]

I want to share some wisdom from my high school art teacher.

In my AP Art class, there was a girl who was just starting to experiment with mixed media. At this point she was still playing around, trying to decide what direction she wanted to go with her portfolio. So one critique day, she brought in an abstract canvas with some rhinestone highlights and painted and real peacock feathers. She loved sparkles and peacock feathers so she thought she’d try introducing them a *little*. And after everyone had given some input, the teacher gave her his advice, VERY roughly paraphrased here:

“So here’s the thing… I do not like this style. These are just elements that do not speak to me personally, but I see that you like them, and you’re doing interesting things with them.

“My biggest critique is, I only merely *dislike* this piece. I want you to make me HATE it. Go crazy with the things that you like. Don’t hold back trying to make it palatable to people like me. Because I am NEVER going to like it. And if the audience does not like it, it should drive them crazy seeing how much YOU love it.”

Her portfolio was chock full of neon colors and glitter and rhinestones and splashes of peacock feathers and it was a delight. Our teacher despised every piece lol, but she got great marks and I think even won some awards. And more importantly, she was happy and proud of the results. Because she didn’t limit herself by trying to appeal to people who were never going to enjoy what she enjoyed.

Takeaway here: be as cringe as you want. Don’t limit yourself based on other ppl’s tastes. They’re not you, and you are incredible 💕

[magnuspeccatori]

This is the most inspirational thing I've read all week. Possibly all year

[lazarrusrising]

The way both Zachariah and Metatron are the closest to actually understanding Chuck out of all of his children and yet I honestly think he doesn't even see them, not really, because they're not main character potential, but that's exactly why they Know, they're observers, they're orchestrators, they're writers

[foxykindofstand]

people aren't having sex anymore because Leonard Cohen had all of it in the 70s

[transthatmasc]

I get so bummed in fics when Cas introduces himself to Dean as Cas and not Castiel. That’s the name DEAN gave him!!!! Not Gabe, not Hannah, not anyone else, DEAN!! Dean goes “oh I’m gonna be sayin this a lot gotta cut it down” and then REMOVED THE “OF GOD” FROM THE NAME OF AN ANGEL??? Cas coming to terms with that new identity and how it ties him to dean and not his family is soooooooooo juicy.

[gaitou]

do you remember Angel Maxine, the artist behind this song?

Angel opened a gofundme about a month ago, so if possible please consider donating to help fund her future projects :)

Donate to PAY ME FOR EXISTING, organized by Maxine Angel Opoku

I’m Angel Maxine, a trans woman, artist, musician, and activist using my voice, music, and vis… Maxine Angel Opoku needs your support for P

if you aren't able to donate, please share! as of writing this, Angel has only raised €433 out of her €7k goal

[hadesisqueer]

This is the actual Gaang and their counterpart from the Krew actually no I'm not sorry /j

[hungwy]

Another reason why trains would be good is that most people are not good at driving

[reckless-glitch]

[ramblingandpie]

[Video description: Gritty is turning the crank on a flagpole to raise the Progress Pride Flag. He gesticulates angrily that the flag is not blowing in the wind, then gestures offscreen. The flag begins blowing. As Gritty begins raising the flag more, the camera pans out to show a man in a suit and sunglasses, looking like a stern Secret Service agent, is holding a leafblower that points at the flag. End description.]

[countrygypsywt]

[beholdingslut]

in absolute tears about the pride module at my work

[dikdikpronouncedxylophone]

[bigfoots-biggest-fan]

HOLY SHIT GUYS, I WAS INSPIRED BY THIS POST TO TRY MAKE THE SONG AND YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT WHEN I DRAGGED THE TRAINING AUDIO OVER THE BACKING TRACK AND IT LINED UP PERFECTLY

Visit Original Link

Tempted to actually put this on spotify so I can secretly stream it at work...

Tagging @batshit-auspol because as an Australian you're the only big account I know who might share (sorry).

[punkrorschach]

happy first day of pride everyone

[plainclothes2025]

this has never been more true goddd

[audhdspacewizard]

Do you like William Shakespeare's The Tempest?

Do you like sapphic love stories?

Do you like giant robots?

If you answered "Yes," to one or more of these questions, I would like to inform you that Mobile Suit Gundam: The Witch From Mercury is available to watch for free on the Gundam YouTube channel, in both English and Japanese.

[reasonsforhope]

FDA just approved the world’s first once-a-week insulin injection for diabetics, a major development for patients who rely on daily insulin

For millions of people managing type 2 diabetes, mornings begin the same way — a needle, a dose, and a quiet mental note to do it all again

"For millions of people managing type 2 diabetes, mornings begin the same way — a needle, a dose, and a quiet mental note to do it all again tomorrow.

That routine just changed.

On March 26, 2026, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration approved Awiqli (insulin icodec-abae), developed by Novo Nordisk, as the first and only once-weekly basal insulin ever approved for adults with type 2 diabetes in the United States.

This is not a minor update to an existing drug.

It is the first entirely new class of basal insulin to reach U.S. patients in more than two decades.

Instead of injecting insulin every single day, people with type 2 diabetes using Awiqli will only need one shot per week, on the same day, every week.

That means reducing from 365 injections a year down to just 52.

For anyone who has ever felt the weight of that daily ritual — the anxiety of forgetting, the physical discomfort, the constant reminder that their body needs help — this approval represents something much bigger than a dosing schedule.

It represents relief.

How the Drug Actually Works

Understanding why this injection lasts a full week requires a quick look inside the body.

Most traditional basal insulins are absorbed into the bloodstream and begin breaking down within 24 hours, which is why patients need a fresh dose every day to maintain stable blood sugar levels.

Awiqli works differently.

Its active ingredient, insulin icodec-abae, is engineered to loosely attach to a blood protein called albumin, which is found naturally and abundantly in the bloodstream.

This attachment creates a slow-release reservoir.

Instead of flooding the system and fading fast, the insulin releases gradually and consistently over an entire seven-day period, keeping blood sugar in a healthy range around the clock...

The FDA reviewed and ultimately declined to approve it for people with type 1 diabetes, citing concerns about a modestly increased risk of hypoglycemia in that population specifically.

Some regulatory agencies in other countries, including the European Union, Canada, Australia, and Japan, have approved Awiqli for both type 1 and type 2 diabetes, but for now the U.S. approval is limited to type 2...

What Comes Next

Awiqli is not standing alone in this space for long.

Eli Lilly is developing its own once-weekly basal insulin, called efsitora alfa, which is currently in late-stage clinical trials.

If that drug also earns FDA approval, it would give patients and doctors two once-weekly options to choose from, allowing for personalized decisions based on a patient’s health profile, insurance coverage, and individual response.

The broader direction of travel in diabetes care is unmistakable.

Fewer injections, smarter formulations, and better integration with digital tools like continuous glucose monitors and insulin-tracking apps are all converging toward a future where managing diabetes requires less daily mental effort without becoming any less medically precise...

A Small Shot With Large Implications

It is easy to look at a once-weekly injection and see only a scheduling change.

But the science behind Awiqli, the scale of the ONWARDS trials, and the consistent satisfaction reported by patients all point toward something that matters far more than convenience.

Diabetes management has always asked a lot of people.

It asks for daily vigilance, daily discipline, and a daily willingness to confront one’s own condition, sometimes in uncomfortable or inconvenient circumstances.

Anything that reduces that load, without reducing the quality of care, is worth taking seriously.

For the more than 37 million Americans living with diabetes, and the hundreds of millions more around the world, a simpler weekly routine could mean the difference between a treatment plan that works on paper and one that actually works in a person’s life.

That is the real significance of what the FDA approved on March 26, 2026.

Not just a new drug.

A new way of keeping people healthy, one week at a time."

-via Science Aim, March 29, 2026.

[cleolinda]

Oscar-winning ‘Star Wars’ editor Marcia Lucas dies at 80

She was also part of the editing team for Martin Scorsese’s 1970s films “Taxi Driver,” “Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore” and “New York, New

Marcia Lucas was the editor on 1983’s "Return of the Jedi" and the pre-"Star Wars" George Lucas-directed films "THX 1138" and "American Graffiti."

She was also part of the editing team for director Martin Scorsese’s 1970s films "Taxi Driver," "Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore" and "New York, New York."

Marcia Lucas was often called the unsung hero of "Star Wars," the original film that after sequels, prequels and spinoffs has come to be known by its subtitle, "A New Hope."

She convinced husband George that he should have Obi-Wan Kenobi, played by Alec Guinness, in his light saber battle with Darth Vader and become a spirit guide to Mark Hamill’s Luke Skywalker.

And she had to make sense of the raw footage that could’ve been a mess in the wrong hands, including the climactic rebel attack on the Death Star.

[....]

"Her influence on film is indelible, but those who knew her best will remember the way she made life feel more vivid, more beautiful, more fun, and more full of love," a family statement said. "Her work was known for its emotional intelligence, rhythm, and humanity — a rare ability to find the truth of a scene and bring heart, momentum, and clarity to the screen."

[kawuli]

random PSA, I know a lot of people use duckduckgo as a Google alternative search engine, but it always kind of annoyed me when I was using it because it felt like No Name Brand Google

I have switched to using Startpage.com and vastly prefer it. for one thing, instead of displaying an "AI summary" at the top of the search results (unless you turn it off, yes I know), it displays the first paragraph of the Wikipedia article, with link, whenever it finds one that's relevant.

also a waaayyyyy better sense of design than duckduckgo

also private, European based, least annoying search I've used lately (RIP old "don't be evil" Google)

[yomikoreadsbooks]

Keeping a list of Google alternatives just in case…

[saxifraga-x-urbium]

i have one of those, scraped from multiple different rec posts:

Search Engines

Infinity Search is an alternative search engine with a special focus on privacy

DuckDuckGo is a popular search engine for those who value their privacy and are put off by the thought of their every query being tracked and logged. Uses bangs, ![site] for in-page search (sells your data to microsoft and draws from fucking bing)

WolframAlpha is a privately owned search engine that allows you to “compute expert-level answers using Wolfram’s breakthrough algorithms, knowledgebase, and AI technology.” A data search engine.

Boardreader is a search engine for forums and message boards. It allows you to search forums and then filter down results by date and language.

Based in France, Qwant is a privacy-based search engine that won’t record your searches or use your personal details for advertising. Uses “&” as a bang search.

Another privacy-based search engine is Search Encrypt, which uses local encryption to ensure that users’ identifiable information cannot be tracked. Metasearch across multiple engines. 

Offering unbiased results from several sources, SearX is a metasearch engine that aims to present a free, decentralized view of the internet. Can be self-hosted. 

Gibiru’s tagline is “Unfiltered private search” and that’s exactly what it offers. Requires AnonymoX Firefox add-on for privacy. 

Disconnect allows you to conduct anonymous searches through a search engine of your choice.

Swisscows provides fully encrypted searches to protect your privacy and security. Built-in violence/porn filter cannot be overridden. 

MetaGer offers “Privacy Protected Search & Find” through its anonymised search. A plugin will allow it to be made a default.

Gigablast is a private search engine that indexes millions of websites and servers real-time information without tracking your data, keeping you hidden from marketers and spammers. Variety of filtration and refinement options for searching. 

Oscobo is a search engine that protects your privacy while you search the web. By not using any third-party tools or scripts, your data is protected from hacking and misuse. Has a Chrome extension to allow use in toolbar. 

https://search.marginalia.nu/ an independent DIY search engine that focuses on non-commercial content, and attempts to show you sites you perhaps weren't aware of in favor of the sort of sites you probably already knew existed. Use old-school searching rather than query-based for the best results. 

https://www.mojeek.com/ 

https://wiby.me/ - It’s goal is to index as many personalized websites as possible, and NOT commercial sites. 

https://4get.ca/ it works a lot like SearX, but honestly better. It doesn’t have its own index, but pulls from many others. I think it’s the best for research, since it allows you to search for answers from different indexes, is easy to configure, add free, and avoids censorship as much as it can.

https://www.searchenginemap.com/ for more on how search engines relate to each other.

https://yep.com/ is a crawler

https://www.etools.ch/ retrieves from Google, Mojeek, Bing, and Yandex, like Searx

https://www.dogpile.com/ 

https://searxng.org/ (next gen Searx)

https://luxxle.com/ - possibly conservative?

https://presearch.com/ - good for academic?

https://kagi.com/smallweb - free/randomised Kagi.

Other Searchers

www.refseek.com - Academic Resource Search. More than a billion sources: encyclopedia, monographies, magazines.

www.worldcat.org - a search for the contents of 20 thousand worldwide libraries. Find out where lies the nearest rare book you need.

https://link.springer.com - access to more than 10 million scientific documents: books, articles, research protocols.

www.bioline.org.br is a library of scientific bioscience journals published in developing countries.

http://repec.org - volunteers from 102 countries have collected almost 4 million publications on economics and related science.

www.science.gov is an American state search engine on 2200+ scientific sites. More than 200 million articles are indexed.

www.base-search.net is one of the most powerful researches on academic studies texts. More than 100 million scientific documents, 70% of them are free.https://cosine.club/ is an electronic music similarity search engine

[soft-pine]

as the strange combination of a bitter deangirl (gn) and a deancas shipper, i cannot overstate how much i appreciate everyone's thoughtful 15.09 The Trap takes. my only contribution to the conversation is that 15.03 kills me.

at the end of s14, everything happens so fast. cas finally admits to himself something's really wrong with jack. meanwhile jack's killed nick and mary. dean is devastated. rightfully angry. then jack's manipulated into fucking with the whole world. they don't know what to do. the plan dean and sam come up with seems like the only thing with anything close to jack's power. and even cas suggests locking jack away until they have more time to work things out. like i cannot overstate how dramatically quickly everything is unfolding. chuck shows up and says jack will end the world. dean was never gonna be okay with the world ending. was never gonna be okay with anyone but himself sacrificing to make that happen. instead they find out chuck is messing with them. he kills jack, opens hell, and they spend an awful horrible week trying to fight ghosts they thought they'd dealt with long ago, while trying to keep a whole town safe and calm, while grieving jack's death, while having to talk to a demon in his corpse, while reckoning with the fact that everything they've ever known is a lie and an elaborate set-up for a cosmic being's entertainment. like it is punch after punch for weeks and weeks with no breathing room. finally culminating in cas doing something which makes sense but is also very much a pattern where he just decides what to do. which results in rowena dying and sam being entirely torn up.

the conversation dean is having right before cas leaves in 15.03 is trying to take care of a broken up sam. based on what dean says it seems like they haven't even been home for a day. like they haven't even had a moment to try to decompress from the series of escalating, terrifying events which they've been dealing with for days and days pretty much nonstop.

it always strikes me then that what cas says is "You used to trust me, give me the benefit of the doubt. Now you can barely look at me..... I've tried to talk to you, over and over, and you just don't want to hear it. You don't care. I'm... dead to you." i recognize he's parroting back something dean said in 14.18 but i don't understand, i really don't, what the timeline he's working off is. like when is dean supposed to have enough space to work through the emotional ramifications of everything above. when is he supposed to have calmed down enough settle in to feeling any one kind of way.

"You still blame me for Mary." like it just happened, my guy. like where was he supposed to work in grieving for his mom (again) and working to move on from the grief and blame, into fighting off a ghost apocalypse and finding out god is basically jacking off to his pain.

i think patience and understanding has always been one of dean's strong suits. and i think cas tends toward impatience more. and it does make sense that when dean truly does get to the edge of his patience, that feels like a breaking point to cas because he has always had access to it before.

in response, i do think cas is allowed to be reactive and hurt and angry! after all he just went through all of the above as well!!!! but i think it's a grave mistake to think that cas doesn't also need to apologize for lashing out in anger.

[soft-pine]

thinking about this again... and getting .... frustrated because if the trap apology and reconciliation scene is supposed to be resolving their issues.... why is it so one-sided?

like i am not the first to point out that the issues that lead to 15.03 are a long-time pattern of behavior from cas! dean feels angry and betrayed and hurt not only because of what happened at the end of s14 but also for all the ways it calls back to a pattern of hurt!

BUT ALSO dean not offering immediate forgiveness is literally not at all a pattern.... like he is so forgiving often to the point of being so while still in the midst of suffering the effects of the hurt. so it's just sad to me to see the time where he can't offer it so immediately as though that's like some longtime character flaw when it's just. JUST NOT.

the one thing i will say is that of course it doesn't feel out of character for dean to be the one to swallow his pride - or not even realize he's also owed an apology - and apologize first. or just decide to shoulder all the blame for the rupture or feel like it's all his fault (when its not its not its not). but god it hurts!