Ma’am. I’m at my parents’ house.

Hello! You may know me from Livejournal or sweet god, Yahoo Groups. Currently: Heated Rivalry Always: X-Files, Smallville, Due South, Highlander, Sports Night, Oz, SGA, Whoniverse, Vampire Academy, Black Sails, The Magicians, All Things Canadian. Gen X, she/her, 🩷💜💙

[hollzy-baby]

They’re at the cottage and it’s near the end of the summer, Shane’s skin has gone golden and Ilya tackles him to their bed and holds Shane’s arms over his head and very sternly says, “Mr. Hollander, you have been withholding something from me?” And Shane laughs and shakes his head and Ilya tears off his shirt and his little shorts and settles in between his legs and says “You have freckles I have not kissed yet, very serious problem, emergency freckle audit must happen” and takes his toll for the very serious infraction of unkissed unknown Shane freckles

[dntat-makesthings]

The Bite | Rated E | Omegaverse | Shane Hollander/Ilya Rozanov

Shane has been hiding his designation for his entire NHL career. It's been hard, but its been worth it.

Then a single moment makes everything come tumbling down.

Read on AO3.

[dntat-makesthings]

Chapter 6 is up!

[dntat-makesthings]

Chapter 8 is now up :)

[dntat-makesthings]

Chapters 9 AND 10 now live!

[eemolu]

the idea that hollander "tamed" rozanov is really funny to shane because like. ilya finds it hot and is always going along with it, yes of course my husband is so sexy why do you think i moved to this boring fucking city. for dick. meanwhile shane knows the truth which is that ilya tamed himself. he herded shane like a sheepdog until he was exactly in the right position for ilya to flop down at his feet and say i love you, i am a one man guy, sleep with other people if you want but you are it for me, so shane is always there like ??? ilya. what are you talking about. i was literally prepared to be a secret slot on your roster for the rest of time without even admitting that i was gay until you decided to have me over make me lunch and say my name while you come like a love confession and ilya goes lyubmiyy. shut up. i was untamable you tamed the untamable and so shane has to be like yes, baby, i worked so hard, i used all my tricks but he's rolling his eyes because ilya wants to be a wolf shane coaxed inside to sleep on the hearth but instead he's a cat who snuck through the window and fell in love with his prey. self domesticated. and this is just one of the many perfect games they play

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

May I offer some emotional damage on this Tuesday? (Ending is happy)

🎧: Hit the Wall, Gracie Abrams

Edit by me 😘

[ilexa]

Well, well, well. I see we're throwing bricks this morning.

Gorgeous, beautiful bricks that end up just being softly lobbed oranges.

[jorja82729]

[ilexa]

This goes a long way to convincing me that he was NOT wearing a wig in Vampire Academy. (I totally thought he was. I don’t know why. But clearly this is just what his grown out hair looks like.)

(Doesn’t that other guy look like baby Ryan Phillippe in the top picture?)

[ilexa]

So I blogged this July 5, 2015, deep in my Vampire Academy era. It just came up in notifs, and 13 (!) years later, it feels like a sign to get started on that Hollanov fencing AU.

[shanehollandered]

that was so fucking hot.

[ilexa]

The face journey from “yeah I fucked you so good you’re dumb with it” to “how was I so dumb? oh god I am so fucked” is just … chef’s kiss.

[lesbianrozanov]

toddler shane refusing to talk after his hockey team lose a game. yuna & david are trying to be encouraging like “bud!! you played so good!!” and shane is ignoring them while climbing into his car seat where he’s going to angrily drink his juice box and then chew on the straw.

[rabbittush]

He’s had a rough day…

[ilexa]

This is Ilya Rozanov’s favorite Baby Shane story. David has a photo. Ilya gets it blown up to 18x24 and hangs it in the trophy room.

[lavenderprose]

I've been thinking about it and yeah I think Ilya wakes Shane up on his birthday by sitting on top of him and then waiting for Shane to wake up slowly, soft and curious and then Ilya hums happy birthday as he goes down Shane's body and maybe sucks his dick a bit but the main event, the pièce de résistance really is the part where Ilya eats him out until he's completely boneless, just rag doll limp and moaning softly with his knees around his ears, compressed into a shape that is just so right and Ilya is doing that thing where he massages the arch of Shane's foot with his thumb while he fucks him with his tongue and the bliss of it--it's like nothing exists but the floating life raft of their bed on this gently flowing ocean of desire and sex and love.

Then after he comes and Ilya is kissing his way up his side, over his hip and ribs and through his armpit hair and finally to his neck, Ilya says, "Maybe is unfair that it's your birthday but I get to eat cake," and Shane groans from his very toes and tries to push Ilya off the bed and then they WRESTLE while Ilya's dick is still hard and there is cum on one of Ilya's cowlicks. They're married and they're best friends and it's Shane's birthday and they're gonna win the Stanley Cup next month.

[vodka-and-gingerale]

Them: What’s your favorite vocal stim from Heated Rivalry?

Me:

[bedlund]

okay NOW we're having fun

[agenderjane]

New show to watch....wtf....

[agnes-nielsens]

you're telling me this hole is significant to the plot?

[ilexa]

Ilya Rozanov, at his first visit to Shane Hollander’s apartment.

[upset-to-dead]

Obsessed with Ilya struggling to straddle Shane for a second bc Shane's first instinct after being pushed onto a bed is to spread his legs

[russianblush]

#ilya baby get behind me

[russianblush]

HEY HELLO JUST GIVE ME THE GUN INSTEAD

(sorry @joyousmistake these tags killed me)

[pastainhismouth]

I've read so many fics where our boys are doing laundry every single time they fuck and I get it, I too am not a bodily fluid enjoyer

however!

may I introduce the concept of the sex blanket? it's big and soft but not too slidey. it's lightweight enough to be easily bundled into the washer or a picnic basket ('oh my god, ilya, not in the park') but heavy enough to absorb their sweat and come without getting it on what's underneath. it's just the right texture for shane to have on his back or his knees or his ass or rubbing against his face. it's machine washable and dries quickly without getting too wrinkled. it's a kind of ugly nondescript colour that doesn't seem to stain. it's a practical (because shane) and endearing (to ilya) solution

with me so far? okay.

now please imagine the sex blanket as mating call. Ilya comes home from the grocery store and shane is sitting reading on the sofa, glasses on, not looking at ilya - but he's laid out the sex blanket across the couch and ilya immediately drops the groceries on the floor. shane gets out of the shower after his morning run expecting ilya to be up with anya or making them breakfast - but he's on the sex blanket on the bed, smirking, and shane gets hard so fast he's weak from it. one time ilya lays the sex blanket out on the patio while they're making dinner and shane can't stop shooting glances at it through the patio doors, getting flustered even though they're cooking something complicated with a lot of steps that he really needs to focus on. Ilya pretends innocence and won't touch him until they're outside after dinner...on the sex blanket.

all I'm saying is I think our boys are pavloving themselves into getting hard at the sight or feel of a particular blanket and I'm so proud of them yay

[rainbow-femme]

Ok but Ilya not realizing until much later that he hurt Shane with things he’d done in the past

One day it randomly comes up as Ilya says something about a time he acted like a dick and Shane is just like “Eh it’s ok, looking back I understand now that you were in a ‘I’m going to hurt you before you can hurt me’ mindset and that’s why you acted like that.”

And Ilya is staring at him and Shane asks what’s wrong and Ilya goes “I hurt you?” And Shane’s just like well yeah but it was forever ago don’t worry about it. But Ilya is worrying about it because back when he’d done the various hurtful things he’d been in downward spirals where he was convinced he didn’t have the ability to hurt Shane because he didn’t matter enough to Shane to hurt him, so he didn’t think the way he acted had any negative effects. And now he’s turning pale and his eyes are getting big as he’s realizing that oh god when he did those things he hurt his favorite person and he hadn’t even realized it

He makes Shane tell him the different times it happened and Shane doesn’t really want to because clearly this is just going to upset Ilya more, but hiding it or lying is probably also going to make things worse in the long run so it’s better to get it out now. So he mentions Ilya ghosting him after they had sex, and then how Ilya acted in Sochi, and that whole night in Vegas, and “I like you… Not as a person, obviously”

And the whole time Ilya is silently nodding and looking like he wants to throw up because no no no those weren’t supposed to be things that hurt Shane, those were supposed to be things that bounced off Shane without affecting him because they were only ever meant to hurt or protect himself, Shane was never supposed to have been hurt by those and fuck how did he not see in the moment the way that he was actively hurting Shane by doing that

And now it’s even worse because Shane won’t even be mad at him about it, he keeps insisting on being understanding and not upset and trying to make Ilya feel better when in fact Ilya is the worst most awful person in the world who should be punished for eternity for making 22 year old floppy haired baby Shane SAD like some kind of MONSTER

The next Galina session Shane is also there with Ilya who has his head in his hands and Shane is just like ok so we may have accidentally stepped on a landmine the other night-

[martelldoran]

when ilya walked into the cottage for the first time, it must have been such a bizarre moment of déjà vu. he goes to the window and there's the garden sloping down to the water and he's seeing shane doing yoga in the documentary. he's looking out the window and thinking, "oh he's moved the chairs. will we sit there together, maybe?"

shane is telling him about the well, and all ilya wants to say is, "i know. i know. i know. i know about the well and the water, and the way the sun looks when it hits the lake. what time was that? what time of day did you film it? i want to see it for myself. with you. is this still your fortress of solitude if i'm here? can it still be your favourite place in the world if you share it with me? i've waited for years to see the heart of you and you're welcoming me in with cokes and a fruit bowl of doritos."

[sobadbad]

HEATED RIVALRY 1.06

[ilexa]

I will never be over this scene. Shane grabbing Ilya’s hair like a handle, thumbs on mouths, neck arches, nipple sucking, fucked our eyes.