Sara

Just a girl hanging out :) Poetic aspirations, though probably delusions of grandeur. Words are life either way. 

[inksplashgirl]

15 Days

15 days.

I am about to leave everything I know

In 15 days.

I am drowning in panic

And racing in fear.

And I cannot wait

To meet myself

Away from those I love

[inksplashgirl]

Time Capsule

It was the last day of school My last day of school ever. And they piled in my car So we could make it.

I took the pictures One at a time All eight of us So we could print them out And put them in the toolbox I bought

We wrote our favorite things And notes to our future selves And zipped them in plastic

And we took one more picture Of all of us together And we buried it.

"We'll meet in five years, And dig it up. Even if we all hate each other," She said.

I laughed. "That's morbid."

Now I wonder If we'll ever go find it.

[inksplashgirl]

Factory

This place is a beast

And it’s eating me.

The drum of the machines

The roar of the fans

The never ending cycle of my screaming body struggling to move

As every day tears it apart.

How much more can it take?

[inksplashgirl]

Miss

I miss my words

The connections they brought

The strangers who told me to write

The chain of syllables linking me to the world

Why did I stop?

I don’t know.

Maybe I forgot

How to feel.

[inksplashgirl]

IDES OF MARCH IDES OF MARCH IDES OF MARCH

CAESAR WAS ASSASSINATED FOR LESS, I LOVE BEING AN AMERICAN ITS SO GOOD FOR MY VIOLENT IMPULSES AND I DEFINITELY DONT ENCOURAGE POLITICAL VIOLENCE BUT DAMN ARE YOU PEOPLE NOT MAKING IT DIFFICULT

[inksplashgirl]

[inksplashgirl]

They say friends are the best thing you can have

But they don’t say how much they tend to leave.

My found family is falling apart

And the members are exposing themselves as worse than I had expected.

Maybe loosing people hurts as much as not having any.

[inksplashgirl]

Welcome For five months I've been trying to find a friend to create a campaign for me. My children are living under bombardment in the war 😭 Please consider them your children and help them 🙏🙏 Stand by my side to save and protect my children. They haven't gone to school for a year 🙏😢😢 Donate to save my children's lives 🍉 🙏🇵🇸 We live in very difficult and desperate circumstances, and the worst of all is that the fear that haunts me increases day by day. Help me provide basic life needs.

This is not a drill. This is our chance to prove that we are not going to stand and watch genocide happen. Help if you can and always always boost this post.

[inksplashgirl]

Sara . please help me and my family

Please, please, please, guys- I am barely scraping by but anyone who can boost and share and donate PLEASE do it. All eyes on Palestine.

[inksplashgirl]

"Hello, I hope you and your family are well. Can you please help me recycle the post on my account? 🌺 And help rescue my family from the war in Gaza? 🙏 Thank you."

https://gofund.me/7a794018

Help! Spread the word! Free Palestine 🇵🇸

[inksplashgirl]

Your favorite song played the other day and I skipped it because Shawn Mendes’ voice pulled on my heart.

I dreamed about you the other night and texted to ask if you were doing okay. You said you were fine.

You drove past me on the street and I waved after I waited a little too long to see if you were going to.

I miss you, but I won’t try to chase you again. By the time I had finally healed enough to try and repair our fragile good terms, the gap had widened just a little too much.

When you wanted to cauterize the would you tore in my chest I wasn’t ready. And when I was, you didn’t want to try anymore.

And that’s how friendships end.

[inksplashgirl]

Jacket

It’s so blue it’s almost black.

Square shoulders.

Silver snaps down the sleeves and front.

Hanging passively on the rack as I stare,

Surrounded by the hurricane of what to keep and what to donate.

Two of the snaps don’t close,

There’s a pair of tiny burn holes in one arm,

It doesn’t fit anymore,

And here I am, clinging to it anyway.

It was my favorite in eighth grade.

I would stim by clicking the snaps open and closed over and over,

I’d hide a body I was rapidly becoming insecure about under its soft cover,

And soothe my anxiety by stroking its suede surface.

I guess I’m afraid that letting go of it means letting go of that version of myself. Even if that’s what growth means.

[inksplashgirl]

Hello, I hope you're doing well! My name is Mahmoud Abu Swierh, and I'm a 17-year-old from Gaza. The ongoing war has devastated my city, destroyed my school, and made daily life incredibly challenging. Despite these hardships, I'm determined to continue my education and build a better future. I've been given a chance to study abroad, but I need help to cover the costs of leaving Gaza, as well as living expenses and other essentials abroad once the crossing opens. If you can, please consider donating or sharing, your kindness can truly make a difference. Thank you. https://gofund.me/bd3ccf0b

Thank you for reaching out! Gaza needs our attention and support.

I’m struggling to get by right now and can’t donate, but I can share. If you are able, please help! Share! Don’t let people forget what is happening in Gaza!

[inksplashgirl]

I am a good person who made a mistake.

It was a hell of a mistake.

But

I still take midnight drives

I still read to my sister and teach my nephew to hug trees

I still buy my sibling their birthday present four months early so I can see their smile

I still try to slowly reassemble the shattered pieces of my lover’s trust.

I still feel the crack in my heart from what I did.

But I am a good person.

And it will heal.

[inksplashgirl]

(Massive Trigger Warning!)

(Heavily Suicidal and Depressive Themes!)

You don’t get to kill yourself.

Every single iota of pain you’re going through, you deserve.

Death is a privilege of relief you don’t get to have.

You want to fix the pain? Then fucking stick it out.

You hurt the singular person you love most in the world and now you have to deal with the consequences.

You’re so fucking pathetic.

You’re not even the one hurting.

You’re so fucking selfish you make me sick.

You can’t cut yourself. You promised. So take up the emotional knife and slice the neurons of your brain into a million slivers of quivering aloneness.

Hell, I wonder why God even wastes the oxygen to let you continue breathing.

You don’t even deserve death.

[inksplashgirl]

a letter to twenty one pilots

Dear twenty one pilots,

Thank you.

You gave a voice to the cuts in my brain when I didn’t know what they were trying to say.

I was less alone when I had Migraine and Kitchen Sink to hold my depression.

I owe you my life, for leaching the loneliness from mental illness and teaching me not to let my demons win.

From,

Me

[inksplashgirl]

This is my golden summer.

Every second will be squeezed like a peach, their sappy sweetness dripping down my arms.

I lie on my side in my car, staring at Venus through the window.

I can feel every breath slithering across my hands as they press the letters on the screen, uncertain why I’m even typing.

My heart feels like it’s in a wine press. I don’t know why, nor do I want to. I’m a melancholy and dramatic girl who ties far more weight to her emotions than they actually warrant.

I will be fine.

Even if I don’t know what’s wrong.