the resurrection of the fangirl

just a fic writer who daylights as a functioning adult. current fixations: the pitt // heated rivalry // 9-1-1 // st always @insomniacwriter17 on ao3! 31. she/her.

[insomniacwriter17]

Project Manager -- AMA

so hello, here i am again. after a [redacted] break, i am back on my bullshit and thinking more about fic writing than anything else in my life...it's a coping mechanism it's fun!

(un)fortunately for all involved, several ideas survived my hiatus, and my trauma now fuels my source material

yes, the number of fandoms has increased. what can i say? give me two yearning boys and i will eventually arrive on scene.

in an attempt to look half-way organized, here is a breakdown of what my brain is thinking about 24/7, whether i am actively writing or staring at the document longingly:

projects currently open/being typed

"Rebuilt" // Heated Rivalry // Ilya-centric ilya's therapist suggests age regression as a therapeutic technique

See-Through // Heated Rivalry // Shane-centric shane is not hiding his secrets as well as he thinks he is

Family Lines // Heated Rivalry // 4&1 4 times yuna & david treat ilya like family (because he is), and 1 time ilya asks to be a part of that family (he doesn't have to)

hovering menacingly nearby

"I'll Find a New Place to be From" // Heated Rivalry // Ilya-centric if you know me at all, you knew this was coming

Saved from the Flames 'verse -- Billy meets his grandparents yes, it's as cute as you think it is

projects that have not been forgotten

TLB 'verse -- little! Billy asks Stevie about his stutter

TLB 'verse -- little! Billy gets jealous

projects that are laughing at me from ellipsus

Through the Years // The Pitt // Hucklerobby dennis and robby are too similar to not fall in love, tbh. the universe said so

TLB 'verse -- The Zoo Day

asks waiting to be answered

TLB 'verse - pool rules

cg! robby snaps at little! dennis

projects i wish to start

Saved from the Flames 'verse -- Enter Max Mayfield

Harringrove Starts a Family

anywhozit, my asks are open ...so ASK ME ANYTHING! if you want to talk about what any of these are, give me additional prompts to work on, or gently encourage me back into writing! (please don't bully me, i'll cry). maybe just remind me that writing anything is better than writing nothing.

glad to be back in my funky, comfortable little corner of the internet <3

updated: may 1, 2026

[insomniacwriter17]

Rebuilt -- Hold Me, Promise Me (Ch. 10)

ao3

~~~

Suddenly, Ilya wanted it so badly it made his chest ache. His big, logical brain would probably later find reasons to not want it, but right now? All Ilya could sense was the love he felt with Shane, but multiplied. Different, sure, but much needed all the same. From every angle of his life, the acceptance and care he'd fought so hard to achieve all these years.

Ilya's chin trembled and he finally unfolded himself from where he was curled against the couch, crawling over until he could settle himself in Shane's lap. Immediately, his husband's arms surrounded him and hugged him tight, and Ilya felt himself melt into the touch. "You really t'ink so?" Ilya mumbled against Shane's shoulder, his shoulders hitching as his breath caught on a quiet sob.

Shane's next words were spoken directly into Ilya's hair while Shane rocked them back and forth. "Baby boy, you spent a really long time not getting what you needed or wanted." His voice broke on the last word, and Shane paused for a moment to swallow back the emotion before he continued. "Because you had people that taught you it was wrong to want or need something. I never, ever want you to feel like that again. And I think everyone else in your life would agree with me."

[insomniacwriter17]

someone tell me to focus on rebuilt and ptichka instead of starting my *checks list* 4th WIP.

i am falling victim to the "oh this song would make a good idea" scheme.

[insomniacwriter17]

Rebuilt -- Papa's Brave Boy (Ch. 9)

ao3

~~~

"We keep going," Shane repeated with a smile. When he pulled away, he paused. "But promise me you'll say it again?"

Ilya chewed his lip again, fighting the urge to ask Shane if he was sure. "I'll try," he promised with a soft smile. "Okay?"

"Okay," Shane agreed with a pleased look lighting up his features. "And," he added, turning his attention back to his plate, "For the record, I liked it." His voice was quiet, his cheeks heating up in the adorable blush Ilya loved so much.

Ilya blinked in surprise, looking over. "You did?" His eyebrows raised as he studied his husband.

Shane nodded, using his fork to push his veggies around his plate to avoid making eye contact. He hummed an affirmative, a tiny smile tugging at his lips. "Yeah. Reminds me that just maybe I am not fucking things up." Ilya's small laugh gave Shane the courage to look up, adding, "I think it's tied for favorite with My Shane."

Ilya smirked. "Will keep that in mind." After a beat of silence, he added, "My Shane."

[insomniacwriter17]

I wrote 800 words today 😊

It’s the most I’ve written in awhile and I’m very excited about it ❤️

If all goes according to plan, you’ll have a new Rebuilt chapter and a Ptichka one shot by the end of next week!

[insomniacwriter17]

apologies on the delay on the writings.

my mental health is fighting me, hard. life is hard and i am sad. i am angry.

and, i am busy. with work, with life things i wish i didn’t have to deal with.

i’m still writing. at least a sentence or two a day, sometimes more.

but i don’t want to take my misery out on our precious boys, so they sit protected in ellipsus until i am able to shower them with the love and attention they deserve.

in the words of ethel cain: and i spend my life, watching it go by from the sidelines and god i’ve tried, but i think it’s about time i put up a fight

im fighting, but life is fighting back.

love you, see you when i see you 🖤

[insomniacwriter17]

"Happy birthday, Ilya Rozanov!" we all say in unison.

Ilya's best birthday ever, now on ao3!

[insomniacwriter17]

canes lb, its been real <3

see yall in the fall.

[insomniacwriter17]

YEAH ROD YOU GO BUDDY

[alcego]

Stank looks fucking tiny out there

[insomniacwriter17]

The cups almost as big as him 🥺

[insomniacwriter17]

BUSSI YOU HOLD THAT CUP HIGH BABY

[jesters-immunity]

AHO MAKING HIM GIVE IT TO HALL FIRST 😭😭😭

[lumpawaroospaceprincess]

“Congrats you won MVP. Also you’re old”

[insomniacwriter17]

JORDAN STAAL MY BELOVED

oh no im crying

[insomniacwriter17]

ew not the hart hoodie crew

[insomniacwriter17]

all of them chanting bussi's name

im so emotional for him

[teossss2434]

YEAH WE CAN SAY IT NOW

BUSSI SHUTOUT IN THE FINAL