[edwardsvirtue]

Hang on a minute. Bella says in Twilight that Forks High School requires students to take Gym all four years. In New Moon, she says that she and Edward have the same class schedule. Are you telling me we missed out on scenes of Bella and Edward in gym class together??? Edward having a panic attack because he has to act human, but also constantly rescue Bella from flying volleyballs??? Imagine the DRAMA

[shittytwilightaus]

twilight au where jacob and mike start actually fighting in the movie theater mike’s stomach bug vs jacob’s 110° fever mike vomits on jacob’s shoes and jacob’s so dizzy he runs headfirst into a wall

[angelicit]

bella swan october november december there’s a possibility window scene is how life’s been feeling lately

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

actually when I was in 8th grade and obsessed with twilight my master plan as a twilight vampire was to sit around in famous shipwrecks like the super deep ones where they can only send robots with cameras from their submarines and when they sent one down i’d be sitting there, pretending to drink out of an old tea cup you know for the drama of it all and the guys in the submarine would know what they saw and that it was real footage but who else would believe them? no one important.

but it didn’t stop there. at the next party they threw to celebrate one of their latest finds, some museum-y banquet idk I was 13, I was going to show up. I was going to show up and make eye contact with them one at a time from across the room and they were going to lose their goddamn minds and then before the volturi could catch wind i was gonna be back in the ocean. how could they find me?

the drama. the theatrics. i can’t believe i didn’t realize i was gay right then but that’s another story, also involving vampires,

[wuackamole]

hate to burst your fantasy, but

1) vampires don’t show up in film

2) vampires can’t cross moving water much less sit at the bottom of the ocean

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

you’ve got me a in a difficult position here because on the one hand, this post is specifically about vampire lore in Twilight, so you’re wrong, but on the other hand, saying “you clearly didn’t read twilight” doesn’t exactly make you look like the bad guy here

[edwardcullenisace]

I wish Bella had spent more time in the supermarket as the series progressed. Big fan of the supermarket scene in the first book. Would've loved her to have a silent crisis in the soup aisle

[edwardcullenisace]

Literally @edwardskhakipants where was the cereal, where was the Phoenix-white-girl enchiladas. Where was the LASAGNA. Not enough food in those films

[spanishinfluenza]

Carlisle, explaining to the kids why they're going back to high school: now bear in mind-

Emmett: oh trust me, it is

[ultward]

the volturi: hi bella. here ar e the fuckign. crown jewels, congratulations on be vampire now

irina: you will NOT believe this boys

the volturi: but wE ALREADY SENT HER.... THE GIFT.........

[toastbutteregg]

[countess-of-edessa]

i think we should stop calling them baby names so people remember they’re not just naming a baby but also a future twenty seven year old with a resume

[starry-night-on-the-impala]

that's why bella called her kid resume right away

[twilight-hoe]

[alicebrandoncullen]

The parent’s guide for the twilight movies on imdb is funny sometimes

[volturialice]

no one:

alice and jasper walking the halls of forks high:

[jaspell]

#fun fact their height difference is actually SEVEN INCHES MORE than this

[volturialice]

y’all’s tags are fucking killing me

[volturialice]

happy 2k notes to this post 🥳

[nohohankerotomania-deactivated2]

[straightboyfriend]

sorry for acting so strange & irregular it will happen again

[fluorescent-contacs-deactivated]

[matchagirl]

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS2AwSZlPlw/?utm_medium=copy_link

[erainab]

[orange-twilight]

i am shook to my goddamn CORE. THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE

[hashtagloveloses]

peak LGBT ally is robert pattinson and taylor lautner kissing each other so that kristen stewart didn’t have to be straight live on TV

[the-incedible-sulk]

OKAY BUT LOOK AT HER FACE! LOOK AT HOW HAPPY SHE IS THAT HES NOT MAKING HER GO THROUGH WITH WHAT THE PEOPLE WANT

The movies might have sucked, but the actors have redeeming qualities

[donnasweettttttttt]

every single thing robert pattinson ever does is intentionally genetically engineered to make stephenie meyer’s mormon blood boil hot enough for her to feel the constant neverending pain he experienced having to make and promote her movies for all those years. this is more than lgbt allyship. this is revenge.

[lubricates]

SORRY GIRLS

[chaoskiro]

[Video ID: A video of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart at an award having just won “Best kiss” for “The Twilight Saga: Eclipse”. Robert places the trophy on the table before him and says:

“I feel bad, I feel bad cause I don’t feel like kissing you, you don’t wanna kiss me do you?”

Kristen fidgets and answers:

“Ehhh well it’s been a long time and I, I think maybe we should finally go for it”

The crowd whoops, but Robert shakes head and probably answers: “I don’t give a damn”

Kristen says: “Really?”

Robert answers:

“I think there’s just someone in the audience who would appreciate it a little more and I just wanna do it but I, I think I know you…]

He’s cut of by Kristen gripping his arm and going “Go get him, go get him”.

He runs into the crowd and she stands alone on the stage smiling. The camera pans to Robert running through the rows of spectators and over to Taylor Lautner whom he kisses enthusiastically on the mouth, then on the forehead and lastly on the hand. End ID]

[snidely-whipstache]

Rosalie, flirting: Oh my God your deltoids are so huge 😍

Emmett, ernestly: I've never used deltoids in my LIFE I swear 😧