Freedom in the Dark

I'm Nyx, Poly, Bisexual, 30, They/Them pronouns. This blog is the museum of my heart. Sometimes, I tag things, but no promises. This blog is about whatever the fuck happens to be running through this witch punk stoner's head. Fandoms, (Heated Rivalry, Black Sails, Sense8, Fo4 WtNV, Good Omens, Doctor Who, Supernatural, FMA, etcetera, etcetera), things I believe in, (Politics, Feminism (TERFs Fuck Off), Liberalism) my struggles, (Recovery from and dealings with: Self Harm, Depression, Suicidal Thoughts) and Random shit I happen to like. I'm open to asks and random conversation, or any advice you might need, but if you don't believe in equality, and just trying to basically be a good person, then Fuck Off; this blog aint for you.

[tikkety-tok]

This is what Rasputin would've wanted.

[teaboot]

I feel like I'm being seduced like one of those fancy rainforest birds

[fruitpilled]

is it working

[teaboot]

Yes

[magnuspool]

[nsk96]

[deehellcat]

if I repeat myself, sorry, but I needed to find this exchange about the bird seduction, finally tracked it down, now I'm gonna reblog it in the (often vain) hope I can actually locate it the NEXT time I need it. lol

[actuallysara]

HUDSON WILLIAMS | Heated Rivalry Toronto Premiere 2025 (via tara_taralynn)

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

imagine you had a friend who constantly made jokes at the expense of something you loved. they're never funny, but they seem to expect you to laugh even though the punchline is just, "this thing you love sucks ass". it's not even really a joke, there's nothing funny about it, you can tell that they genuinely actually believe it. but they insist it's just a joke!

no matter what the situation is, they're always bringing the social interaction to a screeching halt with these jokes. nobody ever wants to participate in this joke with them. nobody agrees with the premise. nobody ever knows what to say afterwards, it's just an awkward moment and a subject change. but they just keep doing it.

you have to stop with the self-deprecatory "humor", it's not fun for anyone including you.

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

#actual advice: switch to self-aggrandizing humor #have the biggest ego in the world even if it's fake #does wonders

as the smartest and most beautiful woman in the world, I can confirm this

[soup-mother]

Putting the term "Catholic Guilt" up on a really high shelf just because I don't want Catholics to have things

[reptile-ruler]

Sometimes a guy in a fanfiction has the ability to read someone's gaze with the same level of detail a wine taster can taste the wine

[reptile-ruler]

"He glared at him with anger in his eyes, but behind that longing and sorrow over things left unsaid, a subtle but desperate yearning for things to be different, and with just a hint of roasted nuts right at the end."

[harpieisthecarpie]

we've all heard about the male gaze in media, but we've yet to explore the equally important sommelier gaze

[reptile-ruler]

the only fun addition to this post

[msmimundo]

Girl that's literally Perry the platypus and Heinz Doofenshmirtz

[willgrahamscock]

sometimes you think yeah i'm over this hyperfixation then you log onto tumblr dot com and your mutual is blorbo posting in such a niche and perverted way that it relights the flame for another decade

[creatingblackcharacters]

There are people who could probably put it in better words than I (though I did try with a lesson!) but one thing I love about being Black and Queer is that once you reject all of the internalized hate that your society has forced onto you, that being Black and being Queer are aberrant, sinful, inferior, something to abhor... It's really fucking awesome. Go together like whipped cream and a sundae fr. I love being me.

I haven't loved myself more than I have accepting myself and how my experiences cannot be separated. I'm not just Black and just Queer, the way I think many queer white folks struggle with (how Whiteness affects even your queerness and understanding of gender experience).

I'm both, they're together and inseparable, they make for something that frankly, is clear everybody Wants because otherwise we wouldn't be the queer pop culture creators and innovators we continue to be.

Idk, I just love it. I love knowing that I'm an existence that was meant to die out or be crushed or wilt under pressure and I'm still standing (ha!) I want that for all of us, fr. Self love won't stop systemic oppression, but it sure helps when you're sure of who you are when you're fighting.

[tinylilhollander]

Ilya always has a mop of frizzy wild curls at the cottage because

They're always in and out of the water – lake swims, pool swims, hot tub, showers – so doing his curl routine each time would be crazy when he could be spending that precious time sucking his boyfriend's dick.

Shane's not the biggest fan of how Ilya's styling products feel. He'll tolerate it, but Ilya can tell by his face that the texture isn't his favourite. Less product = more hair touching.

Shane's hands are always in his hair. When they're kissing. When they're watching a movie. When they fuck. When Ilya sits with his head in Shane's lap. When they're napping on the couch together. Shane's hands are usually full of a handful of Ilya's curls.

Shane seems to really like it. One time Shane said Ilya's fluffy hair made him look like a duckling and he's been chasing that high ever since.

He just prefers this version of him that doesn't need to look perfect and be perfect to be loved and adored. Shane never makes him feel lazy for letting his hair get a little wild over summer. He kisses his temples and tells him he's so fucking beautiful.

[trickydog]

"It is extraordinarily difficult, for example, to teach a wolf to walk on a leash, even if you have raised it from puppyhood and it is quite tame. If you pull, it pulls back automatically, and if you are too insistent and pull too hard, the wolf, no matter how calm and sociable it usually is, panics and tries to escape."

- Don't Shoot The Dog by Karen Pryor about the effectiveness of negative reinforcement on wild animals.

( @mail-me-a-snail & @bookwyrminspiration thank you for the inspiration)

[landmineblogging]

you're doomed regardless. might as well save someone else

[landmineblogging]

do it again. keep going. use everything you have left. burn brightly

[the-haiku-bot]

do it again. keep

going. use everything you

have left. burn brightly

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[wannabetonthat]

Idk if this is a controversial headcanon or not, but I can't imagine Small Shane Hollander being shy and anxious.

He strikes me as the type of kid who really didn't give a single fuck. Not a one. He was doing his own thing and having fun and being good at it, and whether he had friends or not really wasn't a concern for him because it's not like he wanted to hang out with other gross stupid kids. He was a haughty nonchalant child who didn't even register any kind of bullying attempt from fucking Jimmy, bc who cares about Jimmy?

Any kind of feeling of inadequacy came after puberty when other kids started being slightly more interesting and complex and he became the younger kid on his teams instead of just one more of the lot. When hockey practice actually started to need some team synergy and the dynamics changed on him.

But before that, that kid wasn't shy, and he was having a wonderful time

Ilya Rozanov on the other hand...

[lemonsweet]

Do you remember the episode of Spongebob where he's training gary for the snail race and does a coach persona + calls gary a girl and has an aside where he's like "I called you a lady to demean you 🤓" and right after he says that it cuts to sandy and she somehow telepathically feels that Spongebob just did something misogynistic and us like I feel like I need to kick Spongebobs ass for some reason. And then she appears just at the end of the episode to kick his ass.

[keiitopop]

"me and who" bitch Me and You!!! come on take my hand, let's go to Affection World......

together

[rylandsgrace]

[iwrotemrtambourineman]

tashi duncan’s whole life revolves around the fact that she is both devoted and disciplined to tennis but she can no longer play tennis while art is disciplined but not devoted and patrick is devoted but not disciplined and both of those things are glaring weaknesses that disgust tashi but she has formatted her life in such a way that these are the two people who are really in it and she really can’t let go because she’s chasing the high of watching them play together that one time a decade ago where she realized that together they could almost be as devoted and disciplined to tennis as she is

[itsapmseymour]

There’s a Surprise Inside

[maureen2musings]

Day & Night, Arches National Park, Utah

shelbydiamondstar photography