Just A Simple Jellyfish

No thoughts, just float Old enough to buy alcohol, too young to have my shit together

[laeffy]

Every time I get groceries I’m always appalled at how little you can get for like, $20. I was making banana pudding so I needed vanilla wafers but the brand name nilla wafers cost $4 a box. The minimum wage in my state is $7.25/hr. My friend put it really well when he said “imagine you work for an hour and someone hands you two boxes of nilla wafers and said ‘actually this is a bit more than what I owe you’”

[laeffy]

How are some of y’all missing the point so bad. “Shop at aldi instead” “make your own food” “don’t buy brand name” “don’t buy unhealthy processed food” It’s not about the box of cookies. This is about how minimum wage pays peanuts and has stagnated for 12 years while the cost of living keeps growing. No one wants your financial advice about how to survive on beans and rice and frozen veggies. The smartest grocery list in the world is not gonna help you budget your way out of poverty. Please get a grip for the love of god

[byjove]

Without fail, every time a woman is talking about how she does not want to have children and never wants to be pregnant and how medical professionals, romantic interests and family members keep trying to bulldoze her decision and keep expecting her to change her mind because motherhood is something that is expected of all women and it is abhorrent to think a woman could not desire it, a random mother spawns in the comments to be like “Well, actually, you never know! I didn’t want children and then I got pregnant and I realized I love being a mama and I have five little babies now! Could happen to you! 🥰”

Sister, keep that to yourself or make your own goddamn post, you are ignoring that woman’s central concern and belittling her, you don’t even think you’re doing it. Formerly childfree women who ended up having children and loving it are like detransitioners in the sense that there is nothing inherently wrong with changing your mind about having children or realizing you were mistaken about your gender identity but immediately weaponizing your indecision to tell people that the barriers to healthcare and the violations of their bodily autonomy and the way society ignores that person’s wishes is actually okay because you were wrong. Some people do know themselves.

[imissthembutitwasntadisaster]

Watching any movie before 2000 reminds you that people in movies used to be hot but like in a normal way

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[fruitcakebro]

Holy moly they're GOOD. The music is fucking FIRE, and the outfits??? They're all so PRETTY???

[snoodly-boop]

Does anybody know who these are??? Do they have albums!! 🤩🤩🤩

[raspberryslut]

I was so curious that I had to go find this band. They're called Fortress Dwellers and they have a website with all of their socials!

They released an album too! I don't think this song is on it but the rest of their stuff is SO GOOD !!

MUSIC | Fortress Dwellers

Step into the fantasy world of Fortress Dwellers. A fantasy Renaissance musical collective blending epic original music, immersive performan

[ceruleana]

project hail mary is a touching and poignant film that leaves you asking questions about humanity like, "wow what if all mainstream media was genuinely good" and "what if book adaptions actually gave a shit about the book in question" and "what if studios hired actors that could actually act, and then let them get a lil wacky with it"

[astriiformes]

#Don’t forget ‘what if puppetry was treated as a serious artform’ (via @specialagentartemis)

[raccoonmilf]

Chat, is it considered “abusive roommate behavior” to release a raccoon into the living space after you have asked your roommate for months to please clean up their messes (they do not pay any of the mortgage)

[raccoonmilf]

For context, when I used to live alone I would do something called “Princess Time” where I would do an initial sweep (to remove any significant hazards) and then I would release a raccoon into the living area and clean. This helped because I would 1) feel like a princess and 2) the raccoon would bring attention to things my ADHD brain had decided to ignore and I’d quickly clean that stuff up.

So like, if I’m expected to clean the house now, I will be doing it in the way that is most effective for me. And anything that has not been cleaned up after months of having sit-down talks and sending reminders and being promised things will change, might be deemed “trash” by the trash panda and thrown away.

[raccoonmilf]

We haven’t done since we moved into the house, because I didn’t want to cause my roommate or their cats destress or have their things destroyed by a raccoon

[raccoonmilf]

I am a raccoon biologist and one of the few people in the state allowed to take in captive bred raccoons that had been possessed illegally. The raccoon in the photos is Moonshine, but she is currently at the animal sanctuary where I work as I had been quarantining multiple new intakes from an abuse case. I still have two males (Rum Tum Tugger and Electra) left in my home enclosure as we are getting them neutered and then hopefully sending them to an AZA accredited zoo.

I wanna make things very clear that underneath all the whimsy, I am a trained professional.

[raccoonmilf]

Those vibes are likely because I’m the original creator of Dashcon and my personality has not changed since 2012 lmao

[fipindustries]

[nothing-more-than-hot-leaf-juice]

Iroh: so Toph, what are your goals in life?

Toph: I’ve been banned from every major city’s transportation system except Omashu

Toph: I don’t know what their limit is but I will fucking find it 

[probsjosh]

King Boomie, having exactly zero limits:

[theotheristhedoctor]

Unstoppable object meets immovable force

[gaangarang]

[Toph eventually slips up and is captured by the city guard force. Instead of being imprisoned or exiled, Toph finds herself being given audience with the King of Omashu.]

Bumi: Well, well, well. It seems I have finally met the troublemaker who has been causing such chaos with my rail systems.

Toph:…

Bumi: I must say, I am thoroughly impressed with your earthbending abilities. You remind me of myself when I was a lad.

Toph: Get to the point.

Bumi: I see great potential in you, Toph Beifong. I want you inherit my title once I am no longer fit to rule.

Toph: Wait what the fuck

[out-there-on-the-maroon]

Why wasn’t this Toph’s future instead of becoming a freaking cop. This would have made so much more sense. 

[gallusrostromegalus]

My favorite part of this is “when I am no longer fit to rule” because

1. Implying Bumi was fit to rule at any point

1.1 except maybe in the sense that he was completely shredded

2. That he has no plans to die, (nor would death necessarily make him unfit to rule), but that he apparently intends to like. Tuck his arms and legs into himself and just roll off into the sunset.

3. Given that the Earth Kingdom has an actual ruling family that causes some drama in LoK, Toph continuing to cause monarchy confusion is both 100% in character and fucking hilarious.

[definitelynotaminion]

Toph takes over as King Bumi the second and everyone is like “no that’s not how inheriting works” and Bumi is like “No no she’s right, I did say “inherit my title!”

[aromantic-angel]

When toph is no longer fit to rule, she instills bumi (Aang’s son) as her heir and he is known as bumi 3.

[catflowerqueen]

Her first act as ruler is to ban herself from Omashu’s transportation system, thus fulfilling one of her life goals.

[carolofthebell]

But then she ignores her ban and continues to use the transport system forcing her guard to chase her and print wanted posters declaring her a fugitive.

Fortunately the clerks served under King Bumi the First and are well aquatinted with explaining chaos to the confused citizenry of Omashu. Without missing a beat they print the posters in 2 parts.

The first (read this aloud) part is a fairly standard Wanted poster explaining that King Bumi II Toph the Blind Melon Bandit Lord is Banned from the Omashu Transport system for crimes etc….

The second part (do not read this aloud) explains not to be concerned; if you see the King at one of the stations just shout “There she is!” The guards will chase her and you are free to go about your day. The King thanks you for participating in this guard training drill.

[thelambliesdown1974]

victory royale

[valtsv]

there are few experiences more disappointing and embarrassing to be had than when you manage to convince yourself that something was loaded with erotic subtext and feel like the most intelligent sensitive pervert on earth, only to realise that was only the case because you misread or misunderstood an essential element of context which completely transforms if not outright removes any hint of eroticism

[valtsv]

ohhhh okay so i just straight up hallucinated it like a desert mirage. i AM too horny and it IS making me stupid. the 1890s called; there's someone named sigmund freud on the phone who'd like to talk to you about these dreams you've been having.

[mosslingg]

My liege im sorry to break it to you but your advisor that's actually evil and wants you dead turned out to be straight. I know you really wanted to have an enemies to lovers situation with him. Yeah I'm afraid the poisoning didn't hold any romantic intent behind it. The king of the enemy kingdom is bisexual though, I could send him a letter? Yes, I'll make sure to include multiple threats of homoerotic nature. You will have your toxic yaoi, my liege

[redstonedust]

its probably a normal sign for the economy that all of my adulthood fantasies are like "imagine having your own kitchen living room and bathroom to decorate" "what if i could get on a train" "maybe one day i could purchase a sturdy pair of shoes" "i should save and invest in a single bicycle"

[littleguysdaily]

[depsidase]

[tiktaalic]

I was born in the exact right generation I love being an unmarried woman in my twenties with my own bank account and no children

[tiktaalic]

This getting reblogged with “and my thirties” “and my forties” “and my fifties”

[pearlo]

there’s very few things that drive me up the wall in fandom as much as this weird new assumption that fandom is primarily a space for younger people that older folks are only accepted into in a trial basis if they promise to centralize and accommodate younger fans, and further, anything else is creepy and predatory. IT’S OKAY FOR ADULTS TO PRODUCE CONTENT FOR OTHER ADULTS.

[deputychairman]

if I have to read “women in their 30s” used as an insult one more time I swear I’ll - step away from that user and just hang out with the other grownups who consistently create good content because I’m also an adult and too busy comparing car insurance to fight with teenagers on the internet, but goddAMMIT I’ll be annoyed

[teaboot]

I’ve been in this hole since yall lil shits were three apples tall and I’ll die in this hole too

[dykepuffs]

There is a really frustrating thing where some kinds of speculative story are hard to write because they will be assumed to be bad (clumsy, harmful, regressive) metaphors for real-world events or people, rather than exploring completely speculative ideas. Like:

"What if a small group of religious extremists, persecuted in their own country, moved to an inhospitable uninhabited island and had to rebuild society there?" - But the Americas and Australia weren't inhospitable and were full of Native nations, why are you perpetuating the idea of Terra Nullius and manifest destiny? - Yes, that's because this isn't a metaphor for the British invading other countries, it's a metaphor for finding out how much of a person's religious practise is rooted in worldly concerns, vs how much they will really stymie themselves for the sake of God.

"What if 1/100 children born was a werewolf?" - But queer people are no danger to straight people, and disabled people don't have predictable patterns to their illnesses, and most people who have uncontrollable rages really CAN control them and are just lying, and no minority group has superpowers... - Yes, but that's all immaterial, because I wanted to talk about a load of other metaphors about the passage of time and responsibility and the relationship between humans and wildlife.

It almost feels like death of the author, like "Death of the most obvious metaphor" - If you couldn't reach for the (tormented) parallel between being an alien species and being stateless, what stories could someone tell? If your changeling-baby was neither disabled nor adopted, what would the story be about? Etc.

[miseria-fortes-viros]

[ph-cutie]

[bite-my-grimy-fleshy-ass]

If You Like a Long Island, Wait Until You Try the Adios, Motherfucker

If you like a Long Island Iced Tea, wait until you try the provocatively named Adios, Motherfucker. It’s fun, boozy and blue.

Found a recipe for it that's worded like electrochemistry wrote it

[bite-my-grimy-fleshy-ass]

Update: this tastes like if a baha blast could kill you and annihilates any ongoing anxiety attacks

[bite-my-grimy-fleshy-ass]

Update update: comparing this to a long island is like comparing a pickup truck to a tank