Life of Dork @kat5242 - Tumblr Blog

I miss read a sign while driving yesterday.

I don’t remember what it actually said.

But I read Trans Cube

And my first thought was ??? Was it assigned sphere at birth or something?

#funny #humor #billboard #billboards #advertising #driving #i cant read #im dumb sometimes

White people need to apologize to vegetables and their children.

And then never touch one again without understanding what seasoning, butter, sauces, par cooking/timing are.

You do not throw all vegetables in the pan at once. Onions and cabbage take like two minutes. Carrots need to be par boiled before you even think of sticking them in a pan. Peppers need several minutes.

AND ALL OF THEM BENEFIT FROM BUTTER, SALT, SOME KIND OF PEPPER, SOY SAUCE, CREAM SAUCE, ANY SAUCE/CONDIMENT THING

VEGETABLES CAN BE YUMMY AND THEY DONT HAVE TO HAVE AN AWFUL TEXTURE

#picky eater #vegtables #white people #white people suck #white people cant cook #white people cant season #vegtables can be yummy #food #food is so yummy #i love food #picky eating #texture eating

Someone tell me what failure to thrive even means 😭🤣🤣

#funny #weird #doctors #help #doctors appointment #i hate doctors #failure to thrive #symptoms #what does this even mean

I woke up and my first thought was

“Fly you fools”

#lord of the rings #gandalf #lotr fellowship #fellowship of the ring #funny #humor #half asleep #ian mckellen #cats #funny cats

I wonder…. Who the favorite living creature in that house is.

#dogs #families #the tiny cat you can barely see though #humor #funny #bumper sticker #car stickers #stickers #probably a dad that didnt want a dog #driving #commuting

Me and my sibling are playing xenoblade 3 at the same time.

They are ahead because I obsessively explore every area and quest so ive been getting texts like this

#xenoblade #xenoblade 3 #video games #siblings #nintendo #nintendo switch #nintendo games #xenoblade chronicles 3 #sibling relationship

These are the best snickerdoodles out there.

I KNOW whole wheat doesnt belong in dessert but trust me. They are fantastic and soooo easy.

You can ignore the sticky note.

I think everyone deserves this recipe.

#cookies #cookie recipe #recipies #recipe #snickerdoodles #snickerdoodle recipie #baking

I would like to say that in the game he isn’t a mage, or a healer, or even a defender.

He is attacker class. With his umbrella.

#inclusion #diversity #disabled representation #disabled #representation #representation matters

The american credit system is legit like

You haven’t hung yourself yet? Thats wild, here’s some more rope.

#adulting #credit #society #american society #america #i hate being an adult #credit score #humor #dark humor

#funny #humor #my texts are all like this #funny texts #text post #friends

I’m 20 btw

#bubble bath #bubble colors #bathtub #baths #I finally have a functioning bathub for the first time in like 15 years #I litterally asked a slightly confused older worker where the bubble bath was #I was directed to the baby section #I’m so excited for my sunday night bath

Shout out to Just Dance and Pokemon Go for making fun, enjoyable games that get you moving.

Just dance made it so easy to dance and sing and have fun regardless of skill level and genuinely worked up a sweat.

Pokemon go got people outside walking around and exploring like we haven’t in years.

#pokemon go #just dance #exersice #fun #actually fun exercise #just dance was a lot easier when I was younger…#shout out

On one hand I hate road trips because sitting still. But one of the best parts is the billboards.

The farther you go somehow the more random ass they get.

You’ve got your standard Bible ones.

Hell is real, Jesus gave his life, Heaven or Hell.

You have the political ones.

Currently we have a very…. Very… white old man running for governor. He has flannels and a cowboy hat…. In Ohio.

After that you start seeing things like Grandpas cheese barn. Or grandpas cheese and cider barn. Or grandpas pottery barn, or his wood carving barn/shed.

When you get reaaaal out there we get to the worlds largest pick a totally random obscure thing that no one cares about section. I’ve heard of worlds largest cheese, worlds largest hammock (that actually was a fun store), and worlds largest prairie dog.

Then in the dinky towns there are the signs for the obscure museums. “Museum of the special dirt only found in this county”and “museum of vacuum cleaners” (those two I made up but I bet they exist)

Then we havethe weird not national parks but nature preserves I guess? Anyway passed a couple signs for an Egypt wildlife preserve or something. In Ohio.

Then finally we get to the advertisements. My personal favorite from a trip years back, it was in Kentucky I believe. It stated “buy her a diamond ring and you’ll get a free gun”

So yeah bill boards.