Four for you Jaynelle.

http://wewerekoolkids.tumblr.com/

[chickenfarmersan]

[25or6to4]

[pinkomemesforpinkoteens]

[antifachicken]

[omghotmemes]

[stream]

Scary Movie 3 (2003) dir. David Zucker

[lilstinky-deactivated20221002]

this pic is abt to make me lose my life

[wahtdahel-blog]

never forget when Beyoncé’s camera man started doing her choreography

[poypourri]

[gennyescsecsemo]

[ghouliayelp5]

[basic-banshee]

I keep using my girlfriend with unusual work hours to get out of coworker interactions and happy hours and hanging out.

But now the company holiday party is upon us.

And I’ve been lying about the girlfriend.

I suddenly really empathise with the characters in Hallmark Christmas movies.

[basic-banshee]

I like that people have two reactions to this post.

Reasonable: “just say she couldn’t make it!”

Chaotic: FAKE DATING AU

Well, which one is it going to be?

[basic-banshee]

And so it begins

having the DMV area Craigslist bookmarked has never come in handy before but now

[basic-banshee]

Update, Craigslist has flagged my post as inappropriate.

[basic-banshee]

Apparently you can’t solicit a date as a “gig”

I now see my mistake

[basic-banshee]

Update: a date has been acquired. This is true lesbian solidarity in action.

[justluckyiguess]

My wife has now read this and wonders how baby gays are even meeting and mating

[basic-banshee]

Can confirm I am meeting and mating just fine 😂

[basic-banshee]

By the way I’m in a relationship with this woman now

[cooliopumpkin]

[basic-banshee]

This is the feedback I’ve been looking for

[funnyreclaimed]

I believe Willy Wonka invented this...

[bobsdoghouse-blog1]

Wtf

[bossyheifer-deactivated20200822]

It’s called a Pigg O Stat - hard to xray a squirming baby so you drop ‘em in a tube.

[dankxsinatra]

I deadass thought someone had put a baby in a blender for a second there

[leiaisaskywalker-deactivated202]

[catchymemes]

[dstrybys]

the phantom: sing for me my angel of music!!!

9 year old me honestly believing i had both the vocal range and operatic stylings of miss christine daaé:

[art--felt]

I remember first learning that you can cry from any emotion, that emotions are chemical levels in your brain and your body is constantly trying to maintain equilibrium. so if one emotion sky rockets, that chemical becomes flagged and signals the tear duct to open as an exit to release that emotion packaged neatly within a tear. Everything made sense after learning that. That sudden stability of your emotions after crying. How crying is often accompanied by the inability to feel any other emotion in that precise moment. And it is especially beautiful knowing that it is even possible to experience so much beauty or love or happiness that your body literally can’t hold on to all of it. So what I’ve learned is that crying signifies that you are feeling as much as humanely possible and that is living to the fullest extent. So keep feeling and cry often and as much as needed

[wishyroses]

SHIT WHAT

[teal-deer]

Also let yourself cry. It really is a biochemical release valve to dump out all the chemicals that make you feel stuff.

I honestly think one reason men in western culture have so many problems is that we don’t let them cry, and literally their brains get stuffed with all this crap that doesn’t have a release valve. Men, please cry. You’ll feel better. It’s ok. You are not lesser for taking care of your health.

[freewillandphysics]

This is why tears from different emotions look different under an electron microscope. They’re literally made up of different things. 

Happy tears are structurally different than sad tears than angry tears than overwhelmed tears etc.

[samthe-onion-nigga]

I looked it up, cuz that tidbit was dope to me and..

[skyakafreckles]

Never would have known

[lemonlyman-dot-com]

Ah yes, the emotions: grief, change, onion, humor

[cecexheart]

[Ariana Grande singing unintelligible] Me:

[nuka-rockit]

the bible but its retold in memes

[nuka-rockit]

“if she eat the fruit, she a thot”, the Allmighty said

“all women are queensssss” the serpent hissed into Eve’s ear

[nuka-rockit]

HE saw that they had eaten the fruit. and so with divine fury, he cast them out of Paradise as HIS voice thundered across the planes

“This bitch sentient. YEET”

[nuka-rockit]

Jesus handed his disciples the cup with wine

“take a sip babes, for this is my blood”

[zombiebrainsoup]

as he cast samael the lightbringer out of heaven, the lord turned to his voice. metatron, this is so sad. play despacito

[blue-fluffy-dragon]

God saw how corrupt the earth had become, for all the people on earth had corrupted their ways. Then said for all, but Noah and his family, “then perish”

[alleenickel]

And on the seventh day, God said: “It is Sunday, my dudes.”

[quinintheclouds]

And He told His followers about the Promised Land:

Moses commanded the red sea in the name of God, “Move, I’m gay.”

And the Lord spoke to his disciples, “Take, cronch. This is my body, given for you.” Then, lifting the wine, Jesus cracked open a cold one with the boys.

The blind man was made to see by Jesus’ hand, and he looked up in awe. “I’d like to thank not only God but also Jesus.”

The Pharaoh of Egypt would not relent, for he was the sand guardian, guardian of the sand, and the Israelites quivered before him.

Tied up and helpless, Samson’s wig was snatched.

On the third day, Jesus rose again. “I’m a bad bitch, you can’t kill me.”

“PSA: here are the new Commandments, thank you for coming to my TED talk.”

“Um OP literally created the world and everything in it but go off I guess”

Witnessing Jesus walking on water, the disciples were in awe: “Oh, my God — He on x-games mode”

Jesus, bound to the cross, spoke thusly:

[freshlysalted]

Lol biblical memes

[matchasilver]

Fhdhdhdhdhdhsh

[killemzombies]

@indycrash

[colehersch]

filmed my boss firing me from my sales position

[nvlliel]

What.

[xxxtictacion]

Whatever I just heard, make it into a TV show

[joosh-actual-deactivated2018092]

This is the greatest thing I’ve ever seen

[axelinabox]

For the 3rd year in a row I’m seeing people give Netflix’s A Series of Unfortunate Events a try and then get disapointed/angry that nothing good ever comes out of it that everything always seem to go wrong for the Baudelaire and I’m just… if only someone, anyone…. had warned them

[naturelidragon]

me: *is repeatidly told by the story itself that it doesnt end well, has a title sequence song that is just about how one should stop watching immediately because it’s sad, the narrator, each episode, tells me that i have an option of not watching it and proceeds to wait a few seconds for me to leave*

A Series Of Unfortunate Events: *isn’t a happy story*

me:

[fictionismyfreakinglife]

A Series of Unfornate Events: *is a A Series of Unfornate Events*

me:

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[sirartwork]

[glorianas]

this is why god allows him to be that hot