a continuation to heart to heart and a branch from do you love me?
SUMMARY. holding on hurts, letting go hurts. regrets just seem to trail after you like a shadow but ultimately, you have made your decision â this is it. (right?) (3.2k+ words)
GENRE. angst, bittersweet breakup, lovers to exes (but itâs so obvi you still love each other).
CW. one use of a pet name, a breakup scene, repeated apologies, reader experiences a headache. + read the alt text on zhongliâs header for an extra summary!
THOUGHTS. this was long overdue, but thanks to those who waited! this was such a ride⌠3,000+ words just to write a breakup scene?? indeed, that might be a sign to buckle up (maybe).
â° masterlist.
Cold, so cold.
The night breeze was already nipping at your skin moments before but as you mustered the courage to hesitantly face your lover, it felt as if the goosebumps on your arms had all turned into thorns that began to prick at you slowly.
But you just couldnât bring yourself to meet ZHONGLIâs gaze, not yet.
I can imagine sakusa being such a fun little dad. He has cute patterned Sanrio plasters for little accidents. He keeps a small ouch full of âlittle me essentialsâ. He takes his kid to the coolest places and has an Instagram page just full of his kids outfits, that he picks out, sometimes they match (they have matching Ryan bear sweaters). He always matches their shoes :( and he makes his kid the cutest lunches with little anpanman rice balls :(
And after a match his kid would play with his msby uncles until sakusa is out of the shower ready to swoop his baby home for cuddles :( heâs so precious and attentive, he also loves giving his kid a bubble bath and never fails to snap a picture of his kid with Santa Clausâs bubble beard. He keeps a nice little reading corner, full of plushies, he sinks into them with his kid on his lap, reads a soft story to sleep. And when you walk into the room you see them both asleep in the reading corner, sakusa holding your child like precious merchandise
Also sakusaâs kid doesnât like the msby mascot as much as they like bulbasaur, at first sakusa felt defeated. He tired to convince his child everyday how cute their mascot is buy bringing home so many plushies and keyrings, each time his child would ask for bulbasaur. Soon, sakusa gave up and that is why you see his gym bag have a tiny cute bulbasaur plush attached to the zipper. Unlike the rest of his team who have the mascot, he smiles at the way he can differentiate his bag from theirs, mentally thanking his kid for liking bulbasaur.
Social anxiety, and Someone else hurt your feelings; Sakusa comforts you
Genre: established relationship, hurt/comfortÂ
Contents: social anxiety, Fairness fallacy, not feeling ânormalâ, feeling too nervous to eat, not feeling like you can show your true self/not feeling like you can be yourself, crying, pet name: baby, *Sakusa doesnât hurt your feelings, itâs an unspecified person at a party, whatever was said was not specified, but itâs something that would hurt the readerâs feelings/play on an insecurity of the reader
i dont think i havent read any fics that made me relate to ynâs situation except this.
having social anxiety is so hard. as the fic says social anxiety tends to make you overthink what u should wear, how would you act, who are the people uâll hang out with, and etc. itâs so hard bcoz it feels like youâre in a tight situation all the time, especially dealing with society/gatherings.
Me, a first-hand experience of social anxiety made my social life a hell. Because even when im hanging out with my long time friends i still get anxious, to the point i once back out from our meet up and instead cried inside my room. I felt so stupid or like a coward because i couldnât pick up the courage to meet up with my OWN friends.
But time skip to many years later, i gained a new friend and learned that she too experiences social anxiety. And it opened up something in me. I realized that im not alone in this thing we call âsocial anxietyâ a lot of people experience it too, i was just unfortunate to be surrounded by people who are very extroverted and it pressured me into thinking that i was âweirdâ because only i feel that way. But apparently i was wrong, and i also realized that itâs fine backing out from any social gatherings when you feel so scared or anxious about it, because being scared for the sake of your OWN SELF is not a characteristic of a coward. It means you care for your mental health and thatâs something to be proud of, because you know how to take care of your mental health, and know the boundaries of your social battery. You are simply guarding your health, not being selfish or a coward for not attending that social gathering.
The moment you knew that this gathering/meet up feels a bit intimidating to you, and backed out from it, you protected your mental health from any distress.
I still have a lot of things to say regarding to this matter but i think iâll stop here𼴠one last thing: i praise the author for this <3
they get super flustered when you tuck their hair behind their ear. they stutter over their words and their face flushes a pretty red. itâs the cutest thing in the world, you do it randomly to catch them off guard.
same thing but instead they do it to you. they do it when youâre super focused on something or when youâre talking passionately about something. they donât do it to get you flustered or anything (well maybe a little bit), they just really love to admire you.
âholy shit! i donât think i can do this, yn,â a deafening string of curses escaped atsumuâs mouth the moment he looked down; his heart thumping as he was welcomed by the overwhelming view of new zealandâs high mountains. he gripped the thick ropes that held him in the air by his sides as his thoughts scrambled all over his brain, if it was still there, he hopes.Â
âoh my god, stop being such a whiny bitch, you big coward,â you howled in laughter out loud upon seeing his rather comical face, a louder round of them when the one of the staff instructed him to stop shaking and to stay still.
âdid ya really have to fucking pick bungee jumping in nevis swing as yer birthday wish?!â he seethed, head moving side to side as an attempt for a âsafety checkâ while the instructor shushed him, telling him that itâs dangerous if he keeps on thrashing around, âdangerous?! is she stupid or something? even if i donât move, itâs still fucking dangerous! the fact that iâm hanging on these ropes are enough to lead me to my death! shit, iâm not ready to die, yn! we still have to get married in five months, have you forgotten already? i canât believe yaâd want to die before our wedding!â
âtsum, you wonât freaking die! if anything, this⌠is what living really feels like! besides if you do, iâll follow you so we can both die together, isnât that like⌠your last will?â you giggled when he glared at you the hardest he can, only for the annoyance to vanish from his face and be replaced with horror when the instructor began counting down from ten.
âohhh, god⌠oh my god⌠i love you, yn! you have to remember that, okay? if i die, donât you ever follow me⌠holy shit⌠i love you⌠FOR THE REââ he screeched, body finally being pushed and falling towards the spacious air with him facing the view, much to his utter despair. other spectators even let out their own set of snickers when his girly-like screams reached their ears while you got ready to jump as well, smiling as the countdown began for you.
âi love you too, doofusâŚÂ for the rest of my life,â you finished before yelling as the cold wind hit your face. nonetheless, your heart was filled with joy and satisfaction, feeling it become even fuller as you both smiled at each other lovingly while dangling in the air and patiently waiting for the staff to pull you back up.
Waiting for the day people realize Sakusa is not a germaphobe. Furudate even said he wasnât. Heâs not gonna hold sanitizer at u like ur scary. Heâd probably just be blunt and ask you to wash ur hands.
âdo you believe in aliens?â suna rintaro asks, eyes leaving the glimmering stars above and landing on you â his love, his soulmate, the light of his life.
and you turn to look at him â smile making its way onto your face, your temple meeting the soft blanket rintaro had purchased to place comfortably on your buildingâs rooftop. âhm. i think so, yeah.â
his eyes seem to glimmer like the stars above. his eyes seem to hold a billion stars. his eyes seem to hold a tender sort of love, the soft kind that sounds like giggles on a lazy sunday morning and feels warm â as if youâre bathing in the sunlight.
you turn your body to face his. âdo you believe in love, rin?â
he turns to face you. âobviously,â he almost scoffs, thumb sliding down your cheek and onto your bottom lip â he shows his love through touch, youâve noticed, on sleepless nights and early mornings and rainy days. âbecause iâm in love with you.â
sunaâs movements are quick and heâs smiling as he pulls you onto his body â hands on your hips, smile on his face. he admires your figure, eyes filled with stars appreciating every small thing of yours.
âyou make me believe in love,â a butterfly perches itself on his rib cage and flutters itâs wings. heâs about to be all romantic and cheesy â if atsumu were here, heâd surely make fun of him. but he doesnât care, is too lost on you and the halo that the moon has made atop of your head. and the way you make him feel â all breathless and loved.
you lean down per his request and his thumb grazes the side of your face. âyou make me believe in love with the way you take care of me,â he starts again, âand with the way you cling onto me every night and every morning. with all your little love notes and the things you might find insignificant â like buying my favorite snacks even when i donât ask you to.â
tears threaten to spill from your eyes â how had the conversation changed so drastically?
âyou make me believe in love because you pour so much of it into my heart.â
and the tears spill and heâs wiping them away, breathless laughter escaping his lips as he kisses your forehead. âdonât cry! iâm confessing how much i love you!â
you hide your face in the crook of his neck, burying your nose in his hair â smelling his strawberry shampoo, the one you always buy for him.
he kisses your cheek and you think heâs crying, too.
âeven if i donât always tell you how much i love you, i really do. iâm always thinking of you and how i can make you all happy and smiley.â
you sniffle, raise your head. âi love you, too, rintaro. a lot. a little too much.â
he smiles and you want to cry again.
âi love you so much it hurts, my love.â and he kisses you and the world seems to stop spinning.
the stars and the moon are the only witnesses to yours and suna rintaroâs immeasurable love.
note. dedicated to my cutie pie fawn aka @sunascupid
thanks for reading â Ë･âËâ¸(⥠ŕĽá ŕĽâĄ)⸠Ëâď˝ĄË â reblogs are appreciated
Both you and Kiyoomi are clearly passed out and cuddled under the comforter. But it was very much hard for the both of you to cancel out the noise coming from the outside. It was undoubtedly loud, hence why you and Kiyoomi arose.
You sighed. âKiyoomiâŚâ rubbing your eyes to clear out the sleepiness, you saw Kiyoomi slowly standing up.
âMhm, Iâll go check it,â he mumbled as he reached out for your arm to stop you from further rubbing your eyes. âStay here. Iâll be back, love.â
You merely nodded your head as a response.
More than 5 minutes had already passed and Kiyoomi hasnât returned yet. Concern and confusion started to manifest in you, so you got up and went to see it for yourself.
âOh no, not only you made papa wake up but mama too!â Kanaeâthe six year oldâcomplained, and shaking her head as she frowned at her four year old sister; Kaoru.
Ah⌠so it was your twoâcuteâdaughters who caused the commotion. You stood beside your husband who was crouching and resting his hand on both of your daughtersâ shoulder.
âIt was not me, mama!â Kaoru whined, her eyes fleeting back from you to Kiyoomi and to Kanae (which had a deadpanned expression that was clearly from your Kiyoomi.)
Kiyoomiâs hand moves to their back, rubbing it softly. âHey, itâs all right, okay? Mama and papa are not mad.â his reassuring voice calmed Kaoruâs rigid posture.
âBut why are you both up, my babies?â Glancing at the clock, your eyes widen at the time. âItâs 4am in the morning.â That got your voice stern.
âSorry, mamaâŚâ That was Kanae mumbling.
âWe got hungryâŚâ Kaoru added, pouting at you and Kiyoomi.
Both you and Kiyoomi couldnât do anything but sigh. How could you even scold them? They were only hungry and you love your daughters too much to be actually disappointed at them.
Kiyoomi stood up, taking their hands. âLetâs just go back to sleep alright?â
âNuh uh!â Kaoru stated, smiling brightly that had you and Kiyoomiâs eyes squinting in suspicion. âLetâs have a midnight snack!â
At that Kanae perks up.
âOh no.â
The four of you ended up having a âmidnightâ snack in the dining area. You werenât entirely strict with Kanae and Kaoru, neither is Kiyoomi, so this would be a problem for the both of you in the future.
âŚ
30 minutes had passed, Kanae and Kaoru are finally sleeping soundly in their shared room. While you and Kiyoomi are back at the masterâs bedroom.
âKiyoomi?â you questioned.
âYeah?â
âDo you think we should be more strict with them? They shouldnât be up at 4am eating after allâŚâ
Kiyoomiâs breathy laugh resounded in your ear. That laugh. Never fails to put you at ease no matter whatâŚ
âFrom whom do you think they got that trait, hm?â
âOh, shut up.â You nudged his leg with yours. âNever mind, just go back to sleep you annoying ass.â
Kiyoomi merely laughed and kissed you endearingly. âGod, I love you so much and your odd midnight snack rituals.â
âShh! No more talking.â
Kiyoomi kissed you once more before drifting back to slumber.
notes: haikyuu dads are too fun to write, i just love making those tough boys soft for their wife and child (1.3k words)
warnings: none
his lucky charms are always ready when his game was about to start; he'd play just as well without you there. but it's better when you are.
masterlist
more haikyuu dads
he tightens the straps of her mask as youâre pulling a coat over your shoulders, her giggled filling the hallway of your home as he messes with her neatly brushed hair afterwards.
âready?â he asks, picking up izumi and turning to you. you smile to yourself as you watch your baby girl leans into him. her black curly hair fell forward covering what little of her face was left uncovered by her black mask.
nodding, you followed sakusa out of the house, whispering things that made izumi giggle; you smiled to yourself as he turned to you with a smile. "daddy says you're pretty." izumi called out over his shoulder.
sakusa gasped, his fake offended earning more giggles from the young girl. âi told you that in secret!â
you smiled to yourself, remembering the way his face fell when you told him you were pregnant which turned to pure adoration when he saw izumiâs tiny little body in your arms the day she was born. you were watching him raise his own little best friend.
he strapped her into her car seat, pinching at her cheek as she pulled at her mask; turning to you as he shut the car door. âyou still think iâm pretty?â you joked, pulling his mask down to his chin resting your arms on his shoulders.
âyouâve always been beautiful.â he replied; you blushed as his arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you against his chest.
âshut up.â you whispered kissing him deeply; pulling away as his hands began to wander your body. âour daughter is in the car.â
âour daughter might want a sibling.â he joked, his arms hugging you tightly again and pecking your lips again before letting you go.
you both climbed into the carâyou daughterâs favourite song playing as soon as the engine started. she sang along, her singing voice what you would expect from a 4-year-old girl, but it made the two of you smile nonetheless.
sakusa took hold of your hand and gently rubbed his thumb along it as he drives. heâs quietly singing along too; he thinks you never notice but you know heâs got every one of these songs memorised to the point he could sing it in his sleep. but youâll never say anything.
thereâs complaints as you take hold of izumiâshe wants to go inside with sakusa; she wants to see her uncles and play until the game started. you knew she would be content when you eventually got her to her favourite cafe just a street away, but until then you and sakusa were trying to calm the tears falling from her eyes.
with his training bag at his feet, he held her tight against his chest; you stood beside him wiping the tears from her eyes as she sniffled loudly. âweâre coming backâ you smiled at her, âand weâll see daddy play, and uncle âtsumu.â
âuncle sho?â she whispered, the orange-haired man was her favourite of her msby uncles, even though sakusa would much rather none of them were favoured by his daughter.
âyep, uncle sho too. but you can only see them if you come with me.â you smiled, laughing to yourself as she pushed away from her fathers chest and reached out to you.
even though his mask covered his face, you knew he was frowning at her actions. âiâll see you soon.â be mumbled, rubbing izumiâs head and bringing his mask down to kiss your cheek.
izumi is happy once she sat in a chair with a cream and sprinkle covered, small, hot chocolate and half a muffin you were sharing with her; proudly showing off the new jacket you had handed her once you all sat down.
more as a surprise for sakusa, you had commissioned a toddler-sized msby jacket with her name and his number on the back. she always wore a jersey with his number, but the izumi above her fathers number had her jumping in her seat.
finishing your drinks, you held her hand as you walk back to the venueâearly enough to beat the crowds but not too early that the gym was silent.
the msby team are warming up as you approach bokutoâs girlfriend, who waved at you eagerly. as the men line up in preparation for the game, sakusa looks to the stand to exactly where youâre always sat.
you smile, and heâs enchanted by you and everything around you only being distracted as you point down to him; izumi happily waves at him before turning around in her seat under your instruction.
he wishes he was wearing his mask: he canât control the smile that falls on his face as his heart swells with the pride he holds for izumi and it doesnât go unnoticed by his teammatesâexcept atsumu ruins it when he calls out âomi omiâ and sakusaâs scowl returns to his face.
during the game, izumi wants to watch from closer but settles for sitting in your lap cheering for her father, her yells are drowned out by the fans around her but she screams regardless. after every spike; every point; every good play he glances to you. youâre holding your childâhis world is watching him from one seat.
the game ends with an astounding win for msby, and izumi is fidgeting in her seat when she sees sakusa walk off of the court. sheâs waiting for the moment you say itâs okay to leaveâgiving sakusa enough time to freshen up before he held his precious family after a game.
when you finally stand, izumiâs in your arms giggling. sheâs so excited that she kicking her chubby feet and clapping her hands as youâre walking down the stairs with bokutoâs girlfriend beside you. when you reach the bottom of the stairs you can see him waiting for you.
his hair is a little damp; his mask is back on his face and heâs wearing his msby jacket; you know heâs more proud about it now his daughter was wearing a matching garment. you place izumi on her feet; sheâs running to him instantly with an adorable shout of âdaddyâ and a smile on her face that immediately lights up sakusaâs mood.
sheâs in his arms as soon as sheâs close enough for him to pick up, sheâs congratulating himâkissing his cheek and hugging his neck tightly. you join when youâre closer, wrapping an arm around his waist on rubbing the izumiâs back. âdaddy played well didnât he?â you asked, smiling up to sakusa as he looked your way. izumi nodded frantically.
âso did uncle sho!â she cheered, and you try to hold in your laughter as the emotion in his eyes completely changes. heâs jokingly handing izumi to you as he fakes being offended again. izumi giggles, a noise that makes sakusa smile again; his cheeks crinkle and you smile at the sight wishing you could see his grin under his mask.
hinata comes out of the locker room, beaming a smile in your direction and accepting the eager embrace from izumi as she leans over to himâgiving him his own congratulatory hug.
âsheâs going to prefer him one day.â you joke; sakusa shivers at the thought. his hand snakes around your waist as you watch your daughter giggle and pull at hinataâs hair.
âif she ever does weâre having another.â he states quietly enough for only you to hearâhe didnât often share jokes with anyone else.
âyou canât replace your child.â you giggle, leaning your head on his chest. âyou played really well, omi.â you smile, looking up to him again.
âi had my lucky charms here.â patting your waist as he spoke, âi donât think iâll ever lose with my girls watching.â your smile brightens, izumi runs to your feet as hinata put her down again and waves goodbye to you.
picking her up again you hold her tight, âyour girls arenât going anywhere.â
