noise dept.
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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hello vonnie
oozey mess
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
izzy's playlists!
Misplaced Lens Cap
NASA
One Nice Bug Per Day
blake kathryn
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Discoholic 🪩
AnasAbdin
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
$LAYYYTER
taylor price
pixel skylines
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@koala-smiles
My other new bit has been mentioning really obvious stuff as “eagle-eyed viewers may have noticed—“
Like I’ll spill milk all over and say “eagle-eyed viewers may have noticed that there is milk on the floor.”
My husband does NOT like this bit so it’s been traveling with me outside the home.
“Eagle-eyed mutuals may have noticed I’ve reblogged 27 pictures of the blorbo today.”
I realize this is a cast iron gate but I’m choosing to believe it’s a magic protection ritual
It IS a magic protection ritual, and it summons an iron gate to protect you from intruders.
“I cast Iron Gate!”
As a blacksmith I have been called a wizard by several small kids
You Are Not Immune To Pump Shanty
The Mechanisms decided to have some fun with an app that takes songs and makes dance remixes of them and this song was an obvious choice because of the strong rhythm it already has as a shanty.
Unfortunately said app has no concept of song content, much to their mirthful regret, as the app reached the fateful:
"Pump me! Pump me! Pump me! Pump me! Boys! Boys! Boys! Boys!"
top 3 hobbies for young adults:
1. borrowing misery from future
2. carrying grief of the past
3. agonizing over the present
Mulan AU where she does get caught by the other fresh recruits while she's bathing but Mushu helps her spin it like the lake is cursed by an evil lizard demon and will turn men into women if they stay in it for too long.
From there it's not actually difficult to get the other soldiers onboard with covering up the fact that poor Ping took one for the team and got afflicted by the vagina curse, especially since it would have been all of them if they hadn't gotten the warning ahead of time. So they agree to help him cover it up, because obviously the army's not going to understand.
Shang is... tentatively glad that the men are bonding and getting along, even if they continue to be deeply weird about it.
Ling: Hey man, what's up— you've got boobs?!?!
Mulan: Uh, what boobs? Huh? Where did these come from?
Mushu: *facepalms and thinks quickly* (speaks from the shadows) I AM THE SPIRIT OF THE LAKE! BEWARE MY CURSED WATERS FOR THEY WILL TURN MEN INTO WOMEN!
Ling, Yao, and Chien Po: Oh no! The spirit of the cursed waters!
Chi-Fu: SHE'S A WOMAN LI SHANG!
Mulan: Look-
Ling, Yao, and Chien Po: WE CAN EXPLAIN!!
[One convoluted, chaotic explanation later]
Shang: ...is this why you've all been insisting we don't camp anywhere that doesn't have a lake.
Shang: and then none of you actually swim in it.
Shang: and you all keep jumping at shadows.
Shang: wait a second Ping did this happen before or after you became insanely good at fighting?
Shang: did you get better at fighting after you became a woman.
Shang: are women better at fighting than us.
Mulan: ....uh. well. maybe? no one's ever tried to find out.
Yao: [thinking very fast] y'know Captain it's just so hard to find recruits these days.
Chien Po: Real shortage of men.
Ling: Lots of women, though.
Mulan: [catching on] Without marriage prospects.
Shang: You're right, men. The spirits must have done this in order to show us that we should be recruiting women as fighters.
Mushu [from the shadows, seeing an opportunity to do the funniest thing]: EXACTLY, LI SHANG. I HAVE TRANSFORMED PING INTO A WOMAN BECAUSE YOU HAVE TOO LONG OVERLOOKED THE TRUE WAY TO WIN THE WAR.
Mulan [seeing an opportunity to get all the stories straight]: O Great Spirit, is it reversible?
Mushu: WHY WOULD YOU WISH TO REJECT MY GIFT? I HAVE SEEN YOUR HEART, CHILD, AND HAVE ALREADY ALTERED THE MEMORIES OF EVERYONE WHO KNEW YOU BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR THE ARMY. YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN THEIR DAUGHTER.
Li Shang: Welp, the spirits have spoken. Ping - wait is your name still Ping if you're a woman now?
Mulan: Uh. Actually, I was thinking of renaming myself. How do you feel about Mulan?
BONUS:
Mulan [climbing out of the eleventh lake the men have arranged for her to swim in]: Yeah no, it didn't work. Still got boobs. [tries to appear dejected].
Chien Po: If it makes you feel better, they're very nice boobs.
Mulan: Thanks, Chien Po.
Mulan and Mushu, somehow opperating on the same wavelength: oh haven't you heard?
Okay no I need to talk about the book version of Howl's Moving Castle. I love the movie but the book has such a different vibe and you, yes you, should read it.
Movie Howl is a soulful and quiet. Book Howl is a drama queen and Causing Problems and has a long string of jilted exes and couldn't shut up if you paid him.
Sophie and Howl drive each other up the wall at the beginning and it's really funny. Sophie and Howl are (despite themselves) very much in love by the end and they still drive each other up the wall and it's even funnier.
In the movie, Howl has been ordered by the king to participate in The War, and Howl is avoiding it because he is a brave conscientious objector. In the book, Howl has been ordered by the king to rescue his lost brother from the Witch of the Wastes, and Howl is avoiding it by any means necessary because he is a cowardly weasel who wants to stay as far from the Witch as possible.
In the movie, the Witch cursed Sophie because she was jealous about Howl speaking to Sophie for five minutes. In the book, the Witch cursed Sophie because Sophie had been doing surprisingly powerful magic for years without knowing it and it was actually starting to cut into the Witch's plans. (Sophie does not discover any of this until nearly the end of the book, but the reader can start to pick it up much earlier and the way Sophie's magic works is pretty darn cool.)
In the movie, there's a rumor that Howl eats the hearts of maidens, but this is implied to be nothing but nasty fearmongering. In the book, there's a rumor that Howl eats the hearts of maidens because Howl started the rumor so people would stop asking him to do wizard junk all the time.
The book lightly parodies a couple of tropes from Western fairy tales. In particular Sophie has internalized that, as the eldest of three sisters, her "destiny" is to fail so that her younger sisters will look cooler when they succeed, which is why she's so resigned to the hat shop at the beginning. (Sidebar: Sophie's sisters come up much more in the book and they're great.) There's also a really funny bit where Sophie attempts to operate a pair of seven-league boots.
In the movie, the fourth and final location that the magic door connects to is some sort of black void / mindscape / time portal dealy. In the book the fourth location is Wales, in the UK, on Earth, so that Howl can visit his family, because from Howl's perspective this is an isekai story.
Another sword, another cairn. Cut up an old necklace for the chain. The background fabric is scrap fabric from a thrift shop in Edinburgh, Scotland. Photo doesn't do the fabric justice! It's very pretty!
(Also, yes - the sword CAN come out!)
dog i gotta move like yesterday
You know that thing would eat you if you died, right? *pointing to the false image of you that others perceive*
If I'm elected as your president in 2028 I promise to bring back the Western Interior Seaway.
North America peaked with this design and every change since has been worse.
NONONONO NO. NO. DO YOU WANT ANY OF THIS FUCKING SHIT BACK?
Pretty babies come swim in w ater with big fish water is fine with big fish in come taste interior seaway with big fish
Teach a man to fish and the dude with the the thousand fishes will buy the lake where that person fishes and charge them a monthly fee to be able to fish and also take a % of the fish that they catch.
Romeo and Juliet retelling but it's a married couple who are planning to carve time out of their busy schedules to go out together, but she decides to take a little nap to try to get more energy to stay up later, and when he finds her asleep he assumes she's gone to bed for real so he goes all the way to sleep (I'm talking sleep mask + vaporub + white noise + melatonin, or whatever routine people do for a REALLY good sleep) and when she wakes up from her nap and finds him out cold she just goes to bed too. Tragic 😔
I need to build a collection of these low-stakes Modern Shakespeare retellings
The reading comprehension and overall common sense on this website is piss poor.
how dare you say we piss on the poor
no, i do not have cameras in your home (yet)
giant redwood trees really are so cool, they just have something incredibly special going on. it's hard to describe if you haven't seen them
a certain je ne sequoia, if you will
if this post has taught me anything, it's that a great number of people very proudly do not know there's a distinction between "giant redwood" and other redwoods
