Lizard Queen

Hi. My name is Alex. I like pretending I know about politics and reading books. Sometimes I go outside, but not often.

[lesbiangaara-deactivated2017052]

are you a chopped gay a kitchen nightmares gay or a cutthroat kitchen gay

[corporation-cats]

[bombing]

no your honor I absolutely can make my case like an adult. first things first, fuck the defendant and fuck his family too. secondly,

[kremlinofficial]

It's still freaking me out that I graduate this year

Sob

[kremlinofficial]

business email glossary

thanks in advance: get this done by the time i press "send"

thanks for your interest: why'd you have to bring this up

would you be so kind: fucking do it

best: i have never physically met you

all best: this conversation is over

all my best: i wish you would die

happy to help: this is the easiest thing in my inbox

i hope this helps: i've done all i'm willing to do

i did a bit of research: i googled it, because you're too lazy to

sorry to chase: answer my email

so sorry to chase: answer my FUCKING email

i am really sorry for being a pest but: i am LIVID that you are ignoring me

please contact my colleague: this isn't my problem

i'm copying in my colleague: this isn't my problem and i am thrilled about it

i'll check and get back to you: i might forget to

i'll let you know when i hear anything: i will forget to

can you check back with me in a week?: i'm hoping you will forget to

per our earlier conversation: i just yelled at you on the phone

great to chat just now: you just yelled at me on the phone

thanks!: i'm not mad at you

thanks!!: please don't be mad at me

thanks!!!: i'm crying at my desk

please advise: this might be your fault

kindly advise: this is entirely your fault

mind if i swing by?: i'm already in the elevator

can you confirm for me: you told me before and i deleted the email

sorry if that was unclear: i think you're an idiot

let me know if you need anything else: please never contact me again

[naturalpalettes]

Gif by Julien Douvier, hex values under the cut

Keep reading

[aenigmaepoche]

Acropolis Athens,Greece Barbara Blue© 2015

[kremlinofficial]

someone: we both said some things we didn't mean

me, thinking about how i was right and absolutely meant everything i said: ......... sure did, pal

[thenordroom]

Source: Skandia Mäklarna

www.gravityhomeblog.com | Instagram | Pinterest

[maxeth]

what do you mean au

[crownofbone]

BHOLD MY LEGACY

[slightly-bovverd]

I’M SO FUCKING GLAD????

[mothvibesd]

I need so much more of this.

[big-black-x-wing-deactivated202]

save me poe dameron

[luckyarbok]

@salticinae

[fridaygirlhis]

[kremlinofficial]

When I see a cat

Me: [ sharp inhale of breath ]

Me: It's a cat. Omg. Kitty. Hi sweet kitty. Come here. I love you.

[hazelpalee-deactivated20200531]

[bpddeer]

borderline things: being in love

-wanting to text someone 24/7 just to interact with them -always staring at ur Favorite Person when they’re doing something and soaking up every detail -saying “I love you” an excessive amount of times and the words start to lose their meaning but you just loVE THEM SO FUCKING MUCH you gotta say it 24/7 -when they joke around with u and u take one tiny little possible implication behind what they said and make sure to never do that thing ever again. even if they probably weren’t even implying it -realizing wanting to be with them in person 24/7 is not healthy -CONSTANT ATTENTION AND AFFECTION !!!! CONSTANT !!!! -always feeling like they can never love u as much as u love them -having unrealistic expectations of them bc you always buy them little gifts and shower them with attention and affection but you know that not everyone can be like this :)))))

[kremlinofficial]

me: *laughing*

mum: what’s so funny?

me: I conjugated “potatoes” as a verb

me: ich habe gekartoffelt

[languageoclock]

[kremlinofficial]

me: "no honestly I'm the most chill person you'll ever meet"

me: *throws shade 24/7*

me: *blatantly hates everyone and everything*

me: *is overdramatic*

me: *is a major asshole*

me: *complains about everything*