this is my last critical byler post this is just something through my experience of watching discourse and interaction that arrived me to this point of view.
the hardest thing ive had to come to terms with is *why* is byler honestly shipped? If i humour the fan theory that el/will are similar and “cant co-exist”, the fucking dogshit misogyny that is the “andrew in drag” theory, and the funny fact that bylers re-imagine mileven scenes with an insertion of Will, it would appear that bylers lean towards the mileven dynamic with the exception of a girl. Why? ultimately, Ive come to the conclusion that its sexualisation. Mileven is vanilla, digestible and sweet. Byler is sexual by default since its centred around Mikes sexual repression and “internalised homophobia”.
if byler is anyway based on canon, the narrative would be that mike loves will and is dating eleven as a facade, within that deceit and inherent disdain mike would hold for eleven leaves a sense of buzz and erotica for the shipper in question. Its taboo, its the 80s, theres something tempting in knowing what he’s doing is wrong and evil(cheating). Hes using a female character “to conform” (how do you conform by dating someone fugitive whos targeted by the gov? Not sure) and loving his best friend all the while. Fujoshis are far and wide straight women, and we live in a world where women are shamed for pretty much everything; our sexual lives, how we dress, our roles, ETC. you would build up an internal hatred of your own sex, (ie, internalised misogyny) and to see this female character be hated on is what makes it so exciting because you project that hatred of yourself onto her, and you can escape and indulge in your love of the male and the liberation of them onto that.
its why i cannot take “mike wheeler is a bad [insert relationship]” seriously because he actually positively isnt, he is characteristically empathetic, loyal, and would do anything for any of his friends. Hes never been “the bad guy”, which makes sense because the rest of the party are good, normal and friendly characters because this is a fluffy and sappy show. the push for this perception of him as evil is a direct consequence of the influx of byler and projecting their female hatred onto Mike.
to show how much of it is routed in female hatred, mike is regarded as the “bad one in the relationship” which “el deserves better from” yet it is eleven who is deeply criticised and considered flawed, a lot of them boil down to claiming el has no character, personality, rendering her “mentally under-developed”(which is only an opinion you cultivate if you’re media illiterate, she can literally play chess at 8, is emotionally perceptive and intelligent, she travelled to a whole ass city by herself at 13, just because her lived experiences aren’t conventional doesn’t mean she is unintelligent, we are told in s4 it is a selective mutism built out of trauma, and anyway above all it is ableist rhetoric to use that against her), straight up dismissing the nuance and context of her character, refusing to engage honestly with her and only seeing her through a lens of her faults by saying nitpicky things like “she has no interest in dnd therefore shes incompatible with Mike”. and through their disdain they objectify el as just this doll, this female substitute that mike just “has around”. Its why i find this “wondertwins” “willel” heavily disagreeable, to suggest they are the same when its roots stem from the perspective that eleven is just a tool and non-character only to hide his feelings for Will. They essentially become so divorced from who El is as a character they attribute this cookie cutter “female personality” of the “sunshine girl”, who is happy, ditzy and docile (especially about being cheated on!) and unaffected by anything. It is an infantilisation that only serves to humiliate and degrade Els significance to the narrative, to Mike, and to somewhat “punish” canon El for being with him in the first place.
When S4 aired, most I saw was people talking about Mike appearing like hes gawking at Wills butt and lips in a sexually interested way. The ship itself runs on sexualisation because thats where your “proof” comes from on Mikes side, a sexual repression that “comes out” (when in actuality, its splicing and slowing down scenes OOC and manufacturing them into something that has meaning where there isnt). this would be fine except the relationship in question is teen boys, and it invites a rather malicious and paedophilic subgroup of people, which is categorically not fine and actually straight up evil and disgusting. And whats worse is, those type of people thrive in this fandom because theyre all in quiet agreement that the only reason theyre here is to sexualise mike+will. *thats* the pull, theres no need to play moral police according to them.
I flinch like an abused child when I see a tweet talking about some “maga” “misogynistic” “hetslop” (which… come on. stranger things is not quality tv(besides s1), you could extend that “slop” to all relationships and characters including, and actually especially will since he had nothing to do for 3 seasons). ALL of it is performative, not one word of it has any basis and its harmful rhetoric to spread around and downright disrespectful to these genuine global issues for you to use it in a pathetic shipping war.
and its dumb as shit to politicise shipping, shipping is not activism. that being said, its bylrs attempt to vilify mileven through relating them to maga, having conservative values. only one ship warps the truth, creates fake accounts across all social media platforms to bastardise and misinform people, dox and harass those who disagree with you, upholster lies if it aligns with their ideology, and oh yeah, protects pedophiles and fucking hates women. and its not milevens.
The fucking rep bylers have built for mileven, particularly on this site is insane. Stranger things season 1 and 2 defined my early adolescence and i loved it so fucking dearly that i showed up for 3 & 4 even when I knew the quality was dipping. So I come back for 5 again and check out what people are saying and all I see is slander against this simple ass ship. Mike and El. I literally couldnt understand it, it didnt compute in my head that you could actively HATE on this - dislike it, maybe. But Hate? To the point you make posts and insults to the shippers in question, larp as them on fake accounts and spread misleading information and basically propagandise people into why this fan made relationship called “Byler” is superior to the canon material?
Their attempt at defaming Mileven as “misogynistic” is claiming its “BSY - born sexy yesterday trope” which DOES NOT APPLY. The person who coined BSY has literally made video essays on problematic writing for the couples Lumax, Jopper and Jancy, but NOT Mileven. I find it very fucking crazy that bylers can even utter the word misogyny when their ship relies upon Mike being internally homophobic and thus misogynistic in the way he uses El. Like thats what your ship is BUILT ON. Another, is that because the duffer brothers were inspired by a misogynistic anime series of some kind, that makes el misogynistic from her inception. The idea shes ontologically evil, not because of her writing, but because of the mere fact shes created by the duffer brothers, is beyond stupid. if the misogyny was that rampant, what keeps you from not watching the show? And its completely out of touch with reality. Eleven is literally given the most thought and care to her story from 1-4, Max and Nancy are well-written, well-loved and respected characters that have arcs outside of their love interests, whilst the likes of Lucas Mike and Jonathan seem to be their cheerleaders and are way less competent/well-rounded. Again, just saying shit.
And it doesnt stop there, they apply heteronormative thinking onto bylers fanon dynamic, with will who is feminised “princess will”, can do no wrong, is so small and little and gentle, and mike is jealous, nasty, a pervert, protective and “dominant”. With of course El being a *required* presence so they can get the thrill of hurting this female character. They get so up in arms about a mileven fantasising about mike and el having children one day, whilst also having fics upon fics of will being “impregnated” in S1 and him being an “omega” because of that like youre NOT serious.
You actively play around with misogynistic framework and dynamics but you think it looks better cause it’s dressed onto two boys. You actively humiliate and mischaracterise one of pop cultures most powerful female MCs Eleven, size her down so AO3 Wills feelings doesnt get hurt. She deserves more than being hurt and humiliated by you on fanon, I mean jesus.
I havent even touched on their incel rhetoric but through their apathy of eleven and projection/self insertion of Will, they convinced themselves that Will somehow *deserves* Mike. Like his suffering as a child can only be taken away if Mike likes him back. This is why these so called Will “fans” are displeased by his ending despite him getting everything he needed and more: love and acceptance, and a future. They centre and reduce Will to Mike, yet are all up on twitter claiming that for El shes “just a girlfriend” like youre losers and youre liars! Like they just got mad about El and Mike sharing a bike like come the fuck on, seriously. They dont care about Will, or El, OR Mike. It’s entirely self gratuitous and just plays upon their personal sexual fantasies. That is all there is to it, and I cannot be convinced otherwise for I have seen *too* fucking much.
Psychologically, I understand it because weve been conditioned to see women as secondary and men as inherently more deep, complex, (even though eleven actually is the most developed character with the richest history and is the “heart of the story” (yes the duffers said that)). Its just very fucking sobering that people can be so apathetic to a female main character, and project so much nuance and depth onto a character the duffers had NO clue how to write beyond his feelings for Mike. and I know its hard to unlearn internalised misogyny, and also its easier to play around without feeling the shame/“degradation” of a woman in sexual context. But byler? It is tasteless. And even it being tasteless is fine, its just the way byler fandom is literally scum and bottom of the barrel when it comes to etiquette, literally scroll on any mileven post and theres unnecessary slander, and misdirected hatred when its YOUR fandom thats been gaslighting eachother into believing byler could ever be real, you were so scared of “doubt”,literally in a toxic relationship with eachother and thats quite ironic to say the least. Be immoral and weird in fiction, just be fucking kind and understand where to draw the line.
edit: and self admittedly so, thats what its always been, why people try so hard to discredit mikes canon love for el, reduce her significance to the narrative, to mike, and say shes nothing more than a prop for mikes internalised homophobia and stand-in for will. Im not against exploring shit in fiction, its just bylers particular brand of evil that make them become chronically misogynistic and hellbent on discrediting, downplaying, humiliating, infantilising, and demonising El and making it everyone elses problem online. JHC.
