broken but gold

I’m Lexi (she/ her), a 27-year-old poet, aspiring writer, self-taught calligrapher and amateur photographer. 🏳️‍🌈♾️ read my blog Buy me a cup of tea on KoFi

[lexiklecksi]

Welcome to my [tumblr] blog!

Here is everything you need to know about my blog. Please read through it before you follow me. If you still have questions, send me an ask.

Disclaimer: this is an LGBTIQA+ safe space and also my personal safe space, so I'll block whoever I don't want to sneak around. Blogs with no content at all, mostly nsfw content or blogs promoting self-harm and romanticizing mental illness will be blocked. Also, please don't repost my work! If you like something, you are very welcomed to reblog it.

Get in touch: I’m open to poetry collaborations! Just send me a dm and maybe we can write together. Oh also feel free to tag me in tag games, send me a message or ask questions.

About me: I'm Lexi (she/ her), 26 years old and living in Germany. If I have to describe myself with only three adjectives, I go for: creative, talkative, open-minded. The languages I speak are German, English, French and (Cypriot) Greek. My posts are written in my father tongue German and in English. I’m a poet, aspiring writer, self-taught lettering artist and amateur photographer. I've been posting nearly daily to weekly on this blog since July 2017 and I'm very thankful for the online friends I made here, especially in the writing community. Shout-out to my mutuals (you know who you are) I appreciate you very much!

About writeblrcafé: Together with @matcha-chai I founded @writeblrcafe, a platform dedicated to show the great variety of writing on tumblr. We aspire to inspire. Join our writing family or just use our tag #writeblrcafe to get your writing reblogged!

About my wip: You can read a very short synopsis of my ya fantasy wip “Drachenbrut” here (tw: murder):

Enya Arati, a half-breed of dragon and human, seeks revenge for her murdered family. She flees from her hometown Trevena and travels through the magical forest Avni, the high mountains of Zaltana and even the ocean in search of other dragon-borns. Humans, elafids, dwarfs, giants, satyrs and magical beings like faeries, elves, witches and mages either help her or hunt her down. Will she get her revenge and set Trevena on fire? Or will her girlfriend, the siren Meara Kailani, help her forgive and chose a different path?

Mobile links:

Wip page

Wip master post

All poetry collaborations

Flash fiction and fanfiction on AO3

German poetry book

Poetry zine

Tag game list

Tag lists (under the cut): I have three different tag lists: a tag list for my original writing in English (poems and short stories), a tag list for my wip and a tag list for my original writing in German (poems and short stories). Let me know if you want to be tagged by commenting.

My frequently used hashtags are listed under the cut in case you want to browse my blog easier. For a quick search just click on the hashtags under this post. I hope you find something interesting you enjoy! ;-)

Tag list for tag games: Comment for which tag games you want to be tagged under this post.

Tag list for English writing: Never miss a poem or a short story I write! Comment + if you want to be added or - to be removed from my tag list.

@matcha-chai @dg-fragments @silversynthesis @heartofmuse @scatteredthoughts2 @rhapsodyinblue80 @alaskaisnothere @stoic-words @wordsforsadpeeps @writingitdown @intothevortex @raevenlywrites @alex-a-roman @artsymagee @theheightofdepression @writing-is-a-martial-art @beautifulimposter25 @callmepippin @a-musingmichelle @kirkshiresloss @rhythmiccreatorofbeuty @eos109 @azriel-alexander-holmes @tini-rat @captain-kraken

WIP only tag list (comment + if you want to be added or - to be removed): @matcha-chai @callmepippin @zettelkaestchen @silversynthesis @ladywithoringes @stargazingandpoetry @scaevolawrites @lyra-brie @constellationapex @eos109 @azriel-alexander-holmes @charlies-storybook @pinkybenson @captain-kraken @thesorcererspen @poetinprose @writernopal @fantasyizzy-1 @hippiewrites

Used hashtags: You can find my own poetry under #poetryportal, poetry by other talented poets under #poetryreblog, my random thoughts under #2amthoughts and poetic ramblings under #misplacednote, the music I listen to under #recommendedsong and #alternativemusic, inspiring art under #artsy and #originalart, my calligraphy under #calligraphy and photography under #originalphotography. Posts about mental health can be found under #mentalhealthawareness and #selfcare. If you wanna learn something on Tumblr, check out #educationalpost. Oh and do yourself a favour and don't search for #shitpost.

[inkskinned]

Every day I handle more money than I will ever make. Every day.

At the start of my employment, my boss showed me videos of people stealing, and we both had a chuckle about it. How silly they were! There was a camera overhead, and it’s not to watch the shoppers. See, we can’t actually stop shoplifters. They get away with it maybe nine out of ten times. But we, who are watched and tallied and witnessed? We are always caught.

At first it was hard to hold one hundred dollars bills. An amount I had never seen before. An amount that didn’t exist in my household. It’s normal now. Here is something that is not for me.

“What the hell, I’ll take another,” says the man, pondering our 200 dollar watches. What the hell. Total comes to 580 and not even a flinch in his face. I have been working for 11 hours today and made only 110 dollars. It will go to my rent. Today I work for free, it feels. When I get my check, I will have 35 dollars left for food and saving.

The six hundreds he hands me go into the cash register. For a moment, I imagine having money. Then I put it away, counting out his change.

I know for a fact we sell our products for double what they are worth. That I could be making commission. That they could hand me those 580 dollars and change my life and not even mark the difference in their checkbooks. He’s not the only sale they make today, but I am the reason they made it. He’s not the only one spending 600 dollars, but if I hadn’t spent two hours with him telling me about his life, he wouldn’t have spent any. I go home. I don’t own a watch.

I have watched and rewatched a video on how to make salmon four ways. My shopping list is always the same. Pasta. Rice. Tuna. If I can afford butter it was a good week. I dream of the world I will never walk in, where I can throw the best fish fillet in the cart with a shrug. I hold hundreds in my hand and look up at the camera. I put them under the cash drawer.

I go to work. I scrap together my savings. I eat my bowl of rice slowly. My manager takes a paid week off from work just for his birthday. He owns a yacht. 

I’m not worth the cost of a watch.

[inkskinned]

i wrote this while i was working at orlando’s walt disney world parks.

i was part of their college program. i moved to the state for it. they legally owned the building i was living in and still charged me rent. i ostensibly was being charged to work for them. it was a 2 bedroom apartment and they placed 6 adult women in it in forced triples.

as many as one in ten disney employees have experienced homelessness while working for the company. despite huge efforts to unionize, strike, or otherwise demand fair treatment; disney has refused to increase employee quality of life.

disney admits publicly that a good portion of their success is because the employees (“cast members”) are dedicated, passionate, and selfless. this is never reflected in pay. even “face” characters (ie those that are princesses etc) make barely above a minimum wage.

at the time that i worked there, i made $8.50 an hour. at one point i was asked to create a human shield around a bag because a bomb dog had alerted to it. for eight fucking dollars an hour.

i now work a very cushy office job. i have bought the salmon and cooked it all four ways.

i go to the store. i am nice to the person behind the counter. she looks up at the camera while she counts out my change. there is nothing fundamentally different about her and i.

we are both worth more than the watch, anyway.

[madamejadex]

Please remember that Pride is important because someone tonight still believes they’re better off dead than being themselves.

[lexiklecksi]

[renthony]

I've been seeing a lot of posts lately that tell dropouts "you can always go back!"

And that's not bad! It's true for a lot of people! You CAN go back later! You can apply to university, you can get your GED, you can pursue whatever level of education you want. It's not bad to share that message. If you dropped out and want to go back eventually, there is zero timeline. You can go back at any age, with any life experience. You do not have to graduate by a specific age.

But as someone who dropped out of college over a decade ago, sometimes "you can always go back!" starts to feel a little like an empty platitude. Sometimes it starts to feel grating instead of hopeful. Even when it might technically be true, sometimes it still feels like a hollow sentiment.

I just want to say, to anyone else out there who feels that way, who dropped out and CAN'T go back, potentially EVER, whether it's due to poverty or disability or any other reason:

It's okay to drop out and never go back. It might feel shitty, and you may even feel grief over it. That's real, and painful, and allowed. But you are not lesser. Even if you never go back, you are not a failure or a loser. Academics do not define your worth. You are not stupid. And it is almost certain that the system actually failed YOU.

With love,

A fellow burnout

[renthony]

A couple people have reblogged this with the comment that it's also okay to be totally confident in the decision to drop out, and to not grieve about it at all. And you know what? Yeah! They're right!

I personally still deal with a lot of grief about how my university career ended, but that's just one experience. I know other people with zero regrets, who talk openly about the ways that dropping out literally saved their lives. Life throws nasty curveballs sometimes.

So, to everyone who dropped out, for whatever reason, and however you feel about it: the educational system is a fucking minefield, but academics don't define your worth, and sometimes dropping out is the only option. Rock on.

[sariahsue]

@sketchy-panda​

[carpisuns-archive]

[uberfluss]

first 5 faceless emojis are how your summers gonna go

[paper-mario-wiki]

do not forget the patron saint of these weeks that we celebrate ourselves proudly and openly in the streets

her name was Marsha P Johnson, and we have her to thank for so much.

remember, the first Pride was a riot, and she was one of the brave souls who endured it to help carve the path which so many of us walk today. she helped found several activist groups regarding LGBT safety and wellbeing. and she was absolutely radiant, too.

thank you, Marsha. we remember you.

[werewolf-transgenderism]

breaking news! new beautiful photo of the best species of frog in the world just dropped

cochranella euknemos, 📸 nuqui_herping on instagram

[werewolf-transgenderism]

for everyone in the notes lamenting that this guy is poisonous: they are not! they're just pretty :) since they're a glass frog, their major defense mechanism is being translucent and hiding their blood while they sleep so they look extra translucent and blend in with leaves <3

[mckitterick]

[fipindustries]

I cannot stand the parodies of modern major general, they're overdone and simply not as good as the original. They've done them about everything, whatever topic, big or small.

And when i notice one of them my eyes will always start to roll.

The diction's always slurry when they rush the complicated words, and adding many fricatives will turn it so cacophonous. The slanted rhymes are silly and they keep just making more and more, please someone stop the parodies of modern major general.

The scanning of the lyrics in the meter is unbearable, they emphazise the syllables in ways that are untenable, in short in matters musical, prosodic and ephemeral, i cannot stand the parodies of modern major general!

[unorthodoxchronicles]

[creature-wizard]

So, you know how certain Christian missionaries are trained to act in a very obnoxious way, so that most people they preach to will reject them outright, so they feel like the world hates them for being Christian and they can only be friends with fellow Christians? You know that thing?

I think as activists, we sometimes need to stop and ask ourselves whether we're acting like those missionaries. I think this type of behavior is a little more ingrained into our society than some of us realize, and some of us have internalized it without realizing what it's actually meant to do.

[penrosesun]

OP I know that this is probably a different direction than you were going, but genuinely this advice would do so so much to help people not fall into secular political cults.

A lot of high control groups use this tactic to isolate their members. It’s absolutely not just evangelizing Christians. New age wellness cults often encourage their members to make outlandish and offensive accusations regarding the mental and physical health of other people or their children, because they know that the backlash their members receive will reinforce the idea that the “mainstream” simply has no room for people who like crystals and essential oils. White supremacist cults will seed the vocabulary of new recruits with Nazi dog whistles that fly over those recruits heads, specifically so that they will get clocked as possible neo-Nazis and shunned by anyone who might offer them another perspective and help them to get out before it’s too late. And a lot of left-leaning political cults strongly encourage members to share their views in the most inflammatory ways possible, and then say “you see? everyone outside of this small circle is evil and cannot be relied on” when, inevitably, that produces bad results.

Sometimes I think that activists fall into these patterns completely accidentally, either because they were raised in culturally Christian evangelical environments and never unpacked it, or else because they just aren’t any good at approaching things in a non-inflammatory way and no one’s shown them how.

…But sometimes, these structures emerge in activist circles because those circles are legitimately becoming high control groups.

I think some things to watch out for especially in this regard are:

Are you being directed to behave in an extremely hostile and alienating way? (even if it’s by someone who you trust!)

Does the group you are in immediately shut down any conversation about the effectiveness of an antagonistic strategy? In particular, do they shut that conversation down using in-group stock phrases?

Is experiencing harsh rejection seen as something of a rite of passage?

Do you receive more validation from the group you are in after you have been rejected by someone outside the group than at any other time?

Have you ever been concerned that the antagonistic strategy you are using hurt someone you cared about, only to be quickly advised by members of the group that that person was toxic and that you should actually completely cut them out of your life?

These to me are all pretty significant red flags about the group in question, whatever the specific thing that brings people together there is. If you start noticing them in a group that you are a part of, be that an in-person activist circle or a Discord server or anything in between, take a step back and seriously consider the possibility that the good thing that you joined is turning into something different, and possibly dangerous.

In the words of Jonestown survivor Deborah Layton, “Nobody joins a cult. You join a self-help group, a religious movement, a political organization. They change so gradually, by the time you realize you’re entrapped – and almost everybody does – you can’t figure a safe way back out.”

[moxleyrollins]

"All of Torino chanting you deserve it..." MONDAY NIGHT RAW | 06.01.26

[decomposedmaw]

Pixel post dividers for everyone! It's not much, but feel free to use them if you'd like. I don't know the ideal size for these, so let me know if they're too tall. I can make them a bit shorter next time.

[dovesndecay]

I see a lot of folks defending their vitriolic repugnance towards toddlers with cries of "but my sensory needs!" as if children are not also in possession of sensory needs. As if you, an adult here on Tumblr.com, do not have the capability and resources to learn the skills or acquire aids for coping with competing access needs. Or, y'know, just the option to leave, the way children most often do not.

You're holding an actual child to higher standards than you hold yourself, but it's the child that should be removed from public and community spaces. For your comfort.

Go fuck yourselves.

[thornendless2498]

As someone with high sensory needs... I do not claim assholes like that.

If you are using your issues to force kids out of public spaces you can go choke on your own saliva. A grocery store is sensory hell on a good day (and that includes without children screaming) but I would never advocate for someone leaving public because their child, who just so happens to be upset or having sensory issues of their own is now screaming or crying in that same store.

If you try to advocate for children (which my brain automatically categorizes as 'anyone under 18' but that's neither here nor there) not being allowed in public spaces because they might cry, or scream, or otherwise make loud noises/throw tantrums, go fuck yourself. I hope you trip and hurt yourself. I HATE you and everyone like you. You are not more important than a child.

[imsopopfly]

It’s like some people have never heard of noise canceling headphones. Or ordering your groceries delivered if you’re having a REALLY bad sensory day. There are a million ways to deal with sensory issues without making it some kid’s problem

[scorpionlafemme]

[demareth]

but it isnt too late to start tho! if you suddenly wake up and realize the years have slipped by you can start actively living again!

[demareth]

and you know what im not done i think that its actually a very normal and healthy ebb and flow of life

its okay to have stagnant periods, all life has periods of time in its life cycle just to exist and conserve energy and its okay for people to do that too.

but its also very important not to stay in that stagnant period forever!

[sandstone72]

They should make a content label for ai posts like they do for mature content so I dont ever have to fucking look at it

[lizardlicks]

okay nah but this is what I've been saying. everyone arguing over how to regulate AI and what it means for copyright and how do we account for AI without hurting creative industries and and and

Require it to be labeled. that's it. require every instance of AI output to be clearly and obviously labeled that it is AI. Every decision made with AI has to be disclosed in plain phrasing, every email, every paper, every image and video must be clearly and obviously watermarked. Make removing the label/identifier a procecutable offence.

Now everyone who doesn't want it can avoid it. Now everyone using it with intent as a bad actor has to jump through extra hoops (and is on the hook for additional charges when caught). Now every single person who has had their insurance claim or credit application or resume rejected or denied because of AI can point to it and demand a reconsideration. Make. Every. Single. Instance. Of AI use mandated to be legally disclosed. That's it!

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

be kind and respectful to fanfic writers

be kind and respectful to fan artists

be kind and respectful to people in your fandom

be kind and respectful to people

[icantspellthings]

Top 3 things people love insisting they don't have despite it being impossible

Pronouns

An accent

Bias