it's meee I'm your guardian angel hiiiiii 😇 okay🙏 so. in about six months, you're gonna die of starvation. 🥺 and if I don't protect you, I will get: #fired! 🫢 and that is No Good 🙅♀️ hahaaa So. 🙏 I looked into causes of starvation, and it turns out: Your death is totally preventable! 😯 Uh oh! 😆 There's more than enough food to sustain you without interfering with anyone else's survival, but you're not allowed to have it! 🤨 Whaaat? 🤷♀️ Apparently, your death is premeditated by thousands of things called "shareholders." So. 🙏 I've been killing people,
soy yooo tu ángel de la guarda holiiiiii 😇 okay🙏 bueno. en como seis meses, vas a morir de hambre. 🥺 y si no te protejo, me van a: #¡despedir! 🫢 y eso No esta Chido 🙅♀️jajaaa Entonces. 🙏investigue acerca del tema y resulta que: ¡puedo prevenir tu muerte al 100%! 😯 ¡Uh oh! 😆 Hay más que suficiente comida para que sobrevivas sin que interfieras con la supervivencia de los demás, ¡pero no puedes teneral! 🤨 ¿Queeeé? 🤷♀️ Al parecer, tu muerte fue premeditada por miles de cosas llamadas "accionistas." Y bueno. 🙏 empeze a matar personas,
c'est moooi ton ange gardien coucooou 😇 bon 🙏 alors. dans genre six mois, tu vas mourir de faim. 🥺 et si je te protège pas, je vais me faire: #virer ! 🫢 et ça c'est pas Pas Super 🙅♀️ hahaaa Donc. 🙏 j'ai fait mes recherches sur les causes de famine et devine quoi: Ta mort est 100% évitable ! 😯 Oh-oh ! 😆 Il y a largement assez de ressources pour te nourrir sans interférer avec la survie d'autrui, mais tu n'y as pas accès ! 🤨 Quoooi ? 🤷♀️ Apparemment ta mort a été préméditée par des milliers de trucs appelées des "actionnaires". Du coup.🙏 j'ai tué pas mal de monde,
To ja! Jestem twoim aniołem stróżem, cześć! 😇 OK, więc za około sześć miesięcy umrzesz z głodu. 🥺 A jeśli cię nie ochronię, zostanę zwolniona! 🫢 A to nie jest dobre 🙅♀️ hahaaa Więc. 🙏 Sprawdziłam przyczyny głodu i okazuje się, że: Twojej śmierci można całkowicie zapobiec! 😯 O nie! 😆 Jest wystarczająco dużo jedzenia, aby cię utrzymać bez ingerowania w przetrwanie innych, ale nie wolno ci go mieć! 🤨 Cooo? 🤷♀️ Najwyraźniej twoja śmierć jest zaplanowana przez tysiące istot zwanych „akcjonariuszami”. Więc. 🙏 Zabijałam ludzi,
Hiiii Ini akuuu guardian angel muu 😇 okay🙏 Jadi. Dalam kurang lebih enam bulan, kamu akan mati kelaparan. 🥺 dan jika aku tidak melindungimu, aku akan: #dipecat! 🫢 dan itu tidak bagus uh oh 🙅♀️ hahaaa Jadi. 🙏 Aku mencari tau alasan orang mati kelaparan, dan ternyata: kematianmu 100% bisa dihindari! 😯 Uh oh! 😆 ada cukup makanan untukmu tanpa mengganggu keselamatan orang lain, tapi kamu gaboleh makan! 🤨 APAAAA? 🤷♀️ Ternyata, Kematianmu direncanakan sebelumnya oleh ribuan hal yang disebut "pemegang saham." Jadi. 🙏 aku membunuh orang-orang,
Sono iooo il tuo angelo custode ciaooo 😇 ok🙏allora. in più o meno sei mesi, morirai di fame.🥺 e se non ti proteggo, verrò: #licenziato! 🫢 e quello non va Bene 🙅♀️ hahaa Quindi.🙏 ho ricercato le cause per morte di fame, e per quanto pare: La tua morte é completamente pevenibile! 😯 Oh oohh! 😆 C'è più che abbastanza cibo per sostenerti senza interferire con la sopravvivenza di altri, ma non hai il permesso di averlo! 🤨 Cooosa? 🤷♀️ Apparentemente, la tua morte é premeditata da mille cose chiamate "Azionisti." Allora. 🙏 sono stato a uccidere persone,
Yesterday I told a guy I was ace/aro and he asked what “aro” meant, so I told him, and he responded, “Oh, I thought it might be like A-E-R-O and I was confused.”
Yes. I am asexual/aerodynamic. At the slightest hint of sex or romance I launch myself into the air and land several miles away.
Happy 10th birthday to the most popular post I’ve ever made. I have learned about so many aroace characters with the ability to fly from this post and I love that.
Instead of a stoic hero and a chatty villain or a chatty hero and a stoic villian imagine if they’re both chatty. Just, the villian trying their best to kill the hero while the two of them have a in-depth discussion about their opinion of pumpkin spice
Herding sheep, looking after kids, and playing healer in videogames: every day you're surprised of the sheer innovative genius of how they'll find the most inconvenient goddamn places just outside your reach to get hurt or put themselves in lethal danger.
i could never handle immortality not because of any existential reasons but because i know itd make my procrastination so much worse. catch me putting off tasks for decades. catch me putting off tasks for centuries. what do you mean that movie ive been meaning to get around to became lost media 40 years ago. what do you mean that landmark ive been meaning to visit has been eroded. oooh i got PLANY of time..............
Hello, y'know the really really annoying "I have an appointment at 3 pm, guess I can't do anything until then" thing that always happens?
I found a way around it
- small sidenote this may not work for everyone but it took me way too long to figure this out myself so if it helps you hurrah n all that
So
thing -> u have an appointment,, m gonna use my own thing I did as example and it's at 3 pm
step 1 (only step, but biggest invonvenience ngl) U gotta do the math for it
U gotta count the travel time, so for example getting to the place is 40 mins by bus,, I add 20 minutes to make up for any traffic that may or may not exist
So appointment at 3 get out by 2, but it's not done,
u gotta add the tine to get to the vehicle (could be 5 minutes if u go by car, add at least 10 minutes for all the thingamagibs u will 100% only remember once u get in the car)
because I take the bus I add the walking to busstop time (which is 10 minutes from where I live but always end up adding another 10 just to make up for any last minute remembering or feeling more tired or slower)
and that makes 1.50
That's the time no matter what I gotta leave the house,
so last counting, from there count out the time it takes to get ready, from the moment u wake up to leaving the house, I know for a fact we can all do in about 10 minutes forgetting various things until we feel regret later, 30 minutes which is same result but slower or 40 minutes most of which is spent waiting for my brain to remember what it is I actually was gonna do thruought the day to remember what I need
so for safety we again add 10 minutes to those forty bringing us to 1 pm.
NOW because I've done this math every fucking time I gotta do some shit I know for a fACT that even if I were to only start getting dressed at 1 pm? I'd be completely fine, cus that's the time I need,, so in my head 1 pm becomes the line
This puts in the brain that because it's 10am? I can do anything, cus it's nowhere near 1 pm. (it helps even more when you count it with analog clock,, because you can literally see the clock move and that reminds my brain it takes 300 seconds to wait 5 minutes meaning 60 minutes is forever, amd clearly 3 times 60 minutes is something I really don't need to worry about.)
and so for an appointment at 3 that's 40 minutes away I'm out of the house by 1.50 and I'm fully ready cus I gave myself that full hour I actually mostly don't need because stress is the forever best motivator,
It's annoying amd silly but it helps me and I hope it can help someone else cus it does free me from being stuck in the "oh no I can't possibly take a 20 minute shower at 8 am because what if the clock turns to 4 pm while I'm not looking?" because MATH even if I doubled the time it took me to take a shower, it would still be nowhere NEAR 1 meaning I am FREE TO DO THE THING
obviously this does not get easier over time, that shit's a lie by neurotypicals Istg; however, I have gotten really good at counting time, so the important bit is that I got faster and therefore speand less time stressed.
The pros of this madness:
● I am usually early
++ time before actual appointment to do nothing
● If I am not early I am still perfectly on time because of all the added time
-(great especially with early appointments because waking up is a task in itself)
● I mostly leave with everything I need
● All the extra time lets me feel very calm
● even if I wake up late, knowing that by leaving at 1.50 I will still be perfectly on time gets rid of that social stress of being perceived as a mess
The cons:
● So much fucking counting
● Checking the time a whole lot (again, better on analog)
● Waiting, not usually a problem but stress is a lurker agent depending on the seriousness of appointment
● The mental exhaustion of counting all of this everytime u fucking leave the house
and that about sums it up I know it's a really long post and I applogise but fr fr it would be so much longer if I yapped about the hows and whys because there IS a whole process behind it but I cut it off cus I always get kind of annoyed when the "try this" list starts with the lifestory and then u get to the points amd it's just
-take a deep breath :)
- get a schedule and feel the adhd leave ur body :)
so I tried avoiding that.
The first example is for apointments later in the day, but it works in the morning too, like for classes and stuff it's just
thing at 9 am -> travel time + getting to bus time -> 7.50 am (leaving house time) -> time to get completely ready + extra slow brain because mornings -> 6.30 but safe until 7 (up & at it)
the alarm at 6.30 and 6.45 is mostly to wake up and fall back aseep enough to actually feel like I get that sleep, just make sure ur not exhausted or you will sleep through your alarms.
-on a small sidenote, the way way I fall asleep is just letting my brain be loud,, like if u have a song on loop or a scenario or whatever just close your eyes (often the hardest part) and let it play out in your head it'll usually turm into a dream before u realise it
and again this will probably not always work,, sometimes the struggle is just that,, but this is out here now so ✨️✨️
I apologise for any grammar mistakes, I have tried to find and fix the typos and make sense of my mental gymnastics, but wording is hard so it still might not make semse afterall
tangentwithtanner
amandla
vaporwave
ellievsbear
romaincrisis
