let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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cherry valley forever
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
$LAYYYTER
macklin celebrini has autism
Xuebing Du
occasionally subtle
Show & Tell
NASA
bliss lane
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Noah Kahan
todays bird
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
Kiana Khansmith
noise dept.
taylor price
almost home
YOU ARE THE REASON
seen from Australia
seen from United States
seen from Serbia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Belgium
seen from Poland
seen from United States
seen from Netherlands
seen from Malaysia
seen from China
seen from Germany
seen from Argentina
seen from Canada
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seen from Malaysia
@lois-lanes-strapon
hey don't cry. on december 3, 1926, agatha christie went missing for eleven days and because the uk police didn't know what to do they recruited sir arthur conan doyle, creator of master detective sherlock holmes, but all he did was conduct a séance to try and contact her distressed spirit
last line hit like a mack truck
ink: diamine oxblood
*I sit bolt upright in bed* Ilya started smoking because his mom smoked to self medicate and the smell reminds him of her
Shane, blissed out as they’re having sex: Vas-y plus fort, je veux te sentir dans ma gorge, je veux te sentir pendant des jours
Ilya, to himself, with heart eyes: Ah, he too is hiding behind his language to conceal how he really feels about us
ilya pre first hookup: i wouldn't be surprised if this is his first time i better be a little careful with that awkward canadian i don't wanna spook him
ilya coming out of room 1410 at 9:12PM with his third eye opened: oh okay so i might have underestimated him
i know in my heart that shane is the most obnoxious sick person of all time
not because he's a baby a la classic man cold
but because he will AGGRESSIVELY try to pretend he is not sick
he is trying to gaslight others but ALSO himself
he has a gold medal immune system thank you he did NOT get taken down by ill pikeling spreading Elementary School Plague to him
not happening
as an itty bitty he lied so he wouldn't have to skip hockey, and that has NOT changed as an adult
his true toxic trait is that he WILL be typhoid mary in that locker room if it means he doesn't have to stay home and miss playing
the majority of the struggle when shane is sick is just making him ADMIT he is sick
Tags via @penandinkprincess
also CACKLING about the way this looks on the outside.
like. no one else on the team understands Hollander Illness Behavior yet, so they're teasing ilya about being overprotective because shane is SO underplaying it and meanwhile ilya is just, "no, i am so fucking serious. get a medic and then call an ambulance."
and shane who is barely on this realm of existence and about 0.2 seconds from having Involuntary Floor Time is just, "don't worry :) i'll just take an advil or something :)"
WHICH IS NOT HELPING EVERYONE ELSE UNDERSTAND THE MOTHERFUCKING GRAVITY OF THE SITUATION, SHANE, NO MORE CONTRIBUTIONS AT THIS TIME FROM YOU, THANK YOU
I know it's fun in fics but I truly don't think Shane/Ilya would be that open about their sex lives in the Centaurs group chat, they'd really want to keep it professional, but I do think it would take the Cens like half a season to notice that they often both went radio silent in the chat at the same time or disappear from a party at the same time. So the joke is that they're leaving to have sex. They're not texting back because they're having sex. But it's really not serious, they're probably just having lunch without their phones or watching Netflix in the hotel room. Like yeah it's funny to wiggle their eyebrows suggestively when Shane/Ilya come back from the bathroom together but obviously they weren't hooking up in the bathroom, that would be unhinged.
Except, you know, they definitely fucking are.
David jumping to all stars as the moment where Shane and Ilya first hooked up is so funny when you think about it. "You had such great chemistry." Like it's funny enough if he thought they hooked up because of their chemistry on the ice. It's even funnier if he thought they fucked to get that chemistry. He assumes they arrived there as enemies and had sex as some kind of really intense get-along shirt.
ilya is definitely going to a salon and not a barber shop. theyd massacre those curls
mm thinking… he goes out of his way to to to a salon way on the other side of town that many older eastern european ladies frequent so he can shoot the shit in russian with the hairdresser. and all the ladies there love him and dote on him soo much and treat him like a son. and he gets invited to his hairdresser’s daughter’s big russian wedding and bring shane as his date and then he gets to feel at least a little bit of how it might have been for them if everything was different…
one of the reasons I love service submission for them is how it enables maintaining their power dynamic while ilya has a bad mental health day. ilya feeling his most worthless still being served, shane at a point where many partners feel their most helpless knowing exactly how he’s meant to help
Movie about a depressed and rather morbid autistic man planning to commit suicide and picking up a number of odd jobs in an effort to raise enough money to meticulously plan and prepay for his funeral so his mother doesn’t have to worry about it after he is gone. He begins to connect with people and enjoy life for the first time while working part time as a greeter in the funeral home, helping an eccentric old lady organize her basement, walking 7 dogs and maintaining a feral cat colony for a guy with a broken foot, playing a number of bit parts in local ads and stocking the shelves at the convenience store at night. In the end, he has befriended many of his neighbors and he decides he does not want to die and goes back to school to become a funeral director instead.
He is popular at his funeral home gig because he keeps accidentally saying things that are very reassuring and death positive. Because he wants to die. He eventually donates his funeral fund to the old lady’s granddaughter after her sudden death so she does not have to sell her grandmother’s prized possessions to pay for her funeral.
The old lady gifts him one of her ceramic cats at the beginning of the film which he reluctantly accepts out of politeness. Near the end of the film, he adopts a friendly cat from the cat colony that looks remarkably like the ceramic cat and names it after her, signaling his commitment to surviving and caring for his cat the way the old woman lived for her ceramic collection.
[OC] SOMEDAY A MORTICIAN GETS TO SUPERGLUE HIS LIPS SHUT, Seen in Cleveland
if you have to rely on specific scripts or turns of phrase to socialise that's totally fine, but you must NOT reveal them to your friends while slightly drunk. it's like showing how the magic trick works, you can't do it in front of them afterwards
i like dogs a lot but i can never remember the differences between breeds (apart from the few types i've actually owned/interacted with). but i know people looove their dogs and love talking about their dogs, so whenever im talking to a dog owner i'll ask what breed it is, and no matter what breed they say i'll say "oh! i've heard they have a really nice nature :D" and they always go YESSS THEY'RE GREAT and start gushing about their dog and we have a nice conversation and i build social credit with this person. anyway i told my friends about this script a few weeks ago when slightly drunk and now every time we're in public together and a dog goes past they turn to me and ask "does that one have a nice nature?" im in a hell of my own making
rose finally dates a straight man and he has to kindly sit her down and explain that she's definitely a lesbian
Hello skinny tgirl. Lately you've been complaining that your tits aren't growing. In front of you is a plate of food.
Unironically my tits grow faster for a few days every time I eat salmon
I should probably cook more salmon
Well yes salmon does have some fat in it! And it is good! Try and eat it with some carbs, like potatoes, or maybe blinis. Why not add some vegetables as well? Steamed brocolis, grilled leaks, roasted eggplant, and maybe some cream? That sounds delicious.
Idk who this man is but he is right. Eat girls
commas save lives,,, rip girls, you were delicious,
Girls can be eaten many times if you know what you’re doing.
No this is accurate
biology of a stapler
some more speculative staplings
please wear sunscreen!!! I've seen "fuck the beauty industrial complex" posts about complicated skincare regimens and am 100% with them except sometimes they mention sunscreen and no. no. absolutely not. sunscreen is a wonderful supportive friend who wants to keep you safe, and you should let her do it. throw out all your other cosmetics and skincare products if you want, but keep your sunscreen. and if you're not wearing sunscreen, start wearing it!!!! this is not about terror of aging, this is not about every tiny imperfection our fucked-up culture has made you feel insecure about, this is about protecting yourself from skin cancer. wear the damn sunscreen.
